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Become An ORDAINED MINISTER.100% Legal & FREE
    #631315 -

http://www.ulc.org/
Become an ordained minister in less than 3 minutes and start
your own ministry or church of any faith or religion, TODAY.
After your instant ordination, proceed to print your instant full color
ordination credential with your name and ordination date,
all within 3 minutes and absolutely 100% legal.

Whats does everybody think about this
Just thought i would share

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Re: Become An ORDAINED MINISTER.100% Legal & FREE [Re: MuShi_KiNg]
    #631418 -

I became a ULC minister over a year ago and recommend it for those who go into it with the right spirit. They are totally serious about their work, but have an environment free from religous dogma and repression. They encourage debate amongst their members and have a bulletin board for that purpose. The posts are substantive, informed, and respectful. I think we could all learn from them here.


--------------------
I am what Willis was talkin' bout.

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Re: Become An ORDAINED MINISTER.100% Legal & FREE [Re: MuShi_KiNg]
    #632198 -

i was at that site a while back and was going to do it, but i wasn't sure if i was getting sucked into something that i didn't realize, so i didn't do it...

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Re: Become An ORDAINED MINISTER.100% Legal & FREE [Re: Anonymous]
    #632199 -

No Requirements Or Commitments EVER!

maybe i failed to see that part last time...

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Re: Become An ORDAINED MINISTER.100% Legal & FREE [Re: Anonymous]
    #632224 -

sweeeet... for an easy $10 i can be a "Missionary of Music"

or i can just skip all the little accessories and get the "Ministry In A Box" for a mear $89.00.. they even throw in some Holy Land Incense !!!


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Re: Become An ORDAINED MINISTER.100% Legal & FREE [Re: Anonymous]
    #632342 -


ULC:

"We offer special titles such as Shaman, High Priestess, Yogi, and any other variety of title that you can imagine! Contact us for more information on our current titles, or one that is appropriate for you"

ROFLOL

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Re: Become An ORDAINED MINISTER.100% Legal & FREE [Re: Middleman]
    #632356 -

for like $30 you can get your DD and legally use the name "doctor"

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Re: Become An ORDAINED MINISTER.100% Legal & FREE [Re: Anonymous]
    #632366 -

I wanna be a doctor.

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Re: Become An ORDAINED MINISTER.100% Legal & FREE [Re: Middleman]
    #632402 -

"We offer special titles such as Shaman, High Priestess, Yogi, and any other variety of title that you can imagine! "

Sorry, but you cannot take the name of Swami. If you send me an essay on why you want to study under me, I will bequeath on you the title of "Disciple" for free (after you sign over all your worldly goods and renounce materialism.)


--------------------



The proof is in the pudding.

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Re: Become An ORDAINED MINISTER.100% Legal & FREE [Re: Swami]
    #633188 -

well folks... you may now address me as "The good Reverend Smack!"

yes indeed, the lord works in mysterious ways...


one odd thing though. when you sign up, they send you two emails. the first one explains what you can do, a little of their history, and then they try to get you to buy a bunch of stuff. the second email... that was the odd one. it contains some of your "benefits" of joining, and on one of them... well, just read this for yourself!


BONUS #2
=========

The other GREAT BONUS we mentioned was information on how to
obtain a FREE prescription discount plan. We have no idea how
long this service will remain FREE but do phone and make your
own inquiries. Works with most manufacturers. We regularly get
discounts of up to 60% on many prescriptions ourselves so this
is valuable information.

All you need to do is call this number: 1-800-511-1314
They will answer as MEMBER SERVICES. (8:30am - 9pm EST)

The program is called "MATURE RX" (Prescription Drug Program).
There are no age limits or other requirements we know of. This
is a great service so jump on this one folks. They will ask how
you heard about the program. If you say from a friend, they will
charge you a one time $9.95 fee. If you say you heard about it
from a pharmacist (like at Wal-Mart) your lifetime membership is
free. This is because they run thousands of promotions and they
have to know where your information came from. If you like, call
your local Wal-Mart pharmacist and ask about the Mature RX
program. That way you have indeed heard about it from a
pharmacist. We would not advise you saying that you heard about
it from a church however. :-)


Now what the fuck was that all about?

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Re: Become An ORDAINED MINISTER.100% Legal & FREE [Re: Anonymous]
    #633230 -

*frantically writes number down*
Now... uh... they don't require scripts or... hehe... diazepam... adderall... oxycodone... GOD I sound like a fiend.
*rips up number and throws it in the trash can*
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
*Digs ripped up pieces of paper out of trash can....*


--------------------
Note: In desperate need of a cure...

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Re: Become An ORDAINED MINISTER.100% Legal & FREE [Re: MuShi_KiNg]
    #633282 -

"Egon, this reminds me of the time you tried to drill a hole through your head!" -Dr. V.

"It would have worked, if you hadn't stopped me!" - Egon


--------------------
"New shit has come to light..."

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Re: Become An ORDAINED MINISTER.100% Legal & FREE [Re: MuShi_KiNg]
    #633302 -

I would like to be a Minister in The Church of The Banjo!


(' might be able to get tax free banjo strings!!)


--------------------
>>Jammer>>

Edited by Jammer (05/16/02 02:29 PM)

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Re: Become An ORDAINED MINISTER.100% Legal & FREE [Re: MuShi_KiNg]
    #633410 -

Yes, well, I'm all for religious freedom, both Constitutionally and ontologically - as a consequence of our participation in Being, but...I do not like bogus degrees. It's kind of a hoot if you want to give yourself a title like Arthur Klepps did when he called himself Chief Boo Hoo in his psychedelic church in the 60's, but if someone wants to be taken even a little seriously, there's a problem ahappenin'.

Reminds me of the incredibly hot looking platinum blond I went out with who told me she was a "shrink." No...she NEEDED a shrink. She was delusional in a textbook sense. I met her on the phone, so I didn't know how she looked, but she misrepresented herself by saying she was a shrink (which I interpreted as a psychiatrist - an M.D.). Of course, if I had seen her first, I STILL would've gone out with her probably - but that psychosis thing is a real turn-off for me (especially since I had just left a sick, sadistic, alcoholic wife, and I really am a psychotherapist!)

On the other hand, no one with any credibility is gonna recognize these Doctor of Metaphysics degrees, so only the mentally challenged would be taken in by such claims. That would be unfortunate for them, if the 'doctor' turned into a Jim Jones or David Koresh. If one is ethical, one can sometimes use a doctor title to get airline tickets refunded for a client, or ask a judge to take a kid off probation so he can redeem himself by joining the Marines. I have been able to do these things, but I don't use the title to help get restaurant reservations, for example. There's a world of difference between altruism and egotism, and the rewards of the first infinitely outweigh those of the second. Peace.


--------------------
γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself

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Re: Become An ORDAINED MINISTER.100% Legal & FREE [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #633446 -

gday markos the g...hisashiburi! (longtime no see)
in japan, the locals have a fetish for things foreign, including me. but they love having lavish christian style weddings, with of course a foreign celebrant dressed appropriately conducting the ceremony in english. nobody understands a word of it, so you can prattle on about any old shit, it doesnt matter.
anyway if you are foreign and game you can earn $300 for an hours work pretending to be a minister.
if i join this church and have the papers to show my status, i'll be cashed up in no time. one of their authentic (looking) marriage certificates to complete the deal too!
is this ethical? after all the bride and groom are not even christains.

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Re: Become An ORDAINED MINISTER.100% Legal & FREE [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #633785 -

I'm kind of suspicious of this "rug doctor" as well.

I'm also beginning to suspect the "furniture king" is not really royalty.


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Re: Become An ORDAINED MINISTER.100% Legal & FREE [Re: Anonymous]
    #633789 -

I wonder if they have any doctrine regarding Social Security.

I know You can opt out on that if you are a conciecious objector and belong to certain religious organizations.


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Re: Become An ORDAINED MINISTER.100% Legal & FREE [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #633946 -

...but...I do not like bogus degrees...

And you differentiate a bogus degree from a real one by...? Aren't all degrees a document bestowed on an individual by a "group of experts"? And we know they are experts because some other group gave them a degree and so on.

It reminds me of the US Treasury bitching about counterfeit money, while they crank out "billions of dollars" worth of worthless paper, which only works as long as we agree that the government's counterfeits are "real".


--------------------



The proof is in the pudding.

Edited by Swami (05/17/02 05:14 AM)

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Re: Become An ORDAINED MINISTER.100% Legal & FREE [Re: Swami]
    #633955 -

Damn, Swami. Sometimes you're pretty insightful.

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Re: Become An ORDAINED MINISTER.100% Legal & FREE [Re: ]
    #633957 -

Actually that is pure Robert Anton Wilson style of thinking.


--------------------



The proof is in the pudding.

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