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Shop: Myyco.com Isolated Cubensis Liquid Culture For Sale   Unfolding Nature Unfolding Nature: Being in the Implicate Order

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Re: My life without god [Re: OrgoneConclusion]
    #11416335 -

    It's still hard for me to speak of these things, frankly because there so close to home,i haven't fully overcame God, which apart of me feels ironic to say,even guilty.. you see since abandoning my previously conceived notions of God i experienced what was said would be experienced great turmoil, but what an easy prediction i must say.. with or without God i would have experienced great turmoil never the less.

    The religion i was taught (non-denominational christian) seemed to create a trap, a mental vice to the point i feel i could develop a split personality, as ridiculous as that sounds there is a part of me that is firmly grounded in the belief in God and that because of my disbelief in God i am going to go to hell. yet paradoxically to realize my punishment for not believing by default means i believe, but once again we are talking about two different parts of me... the one that is typing is going to hell and then the one that believes this i wonder where it (as i don't associate it with my active self) is going..

    I developed a heart problem, a debilitating heart problem that went undiagnosed for a year an a half, i used to say sadly to my mom people with bad hearts have bad hearts.. so you can probably see that i struggle with depression very severe at times.. before this i joined the army and i was an infantry soldier i was proud for the first time in my life, much like my father, i had aspired to be just like him, even craving submissive women.. regardless i had trouble there (army) not physically as i achieved a lot, but mentally anyway i got booted after 2 years of my life was spent..

    I must have subconsciously realized i was chasing my fathers dreams and that i could not meet his standard his expectations, i was ashamed i couldn't look at myself the anxiety flared. So around that time of being booted i gave up on God and have struggled since.. My father knows of my beliefs and respects them for nothing, i suppose if you knew him you would say he's trying in his way to understand and respect.. but to understand my father who was in the army as well, and a over achiever making something from nothing, and his personality defiantly fits his body, he is a very intimidating person to say the least..

What was i saying oh yea to understand my father you must understand his father an even more intimidating man, ex special forces/ Vietnam veteran/black water/CIA/Wife abuser/child abuser/playboy/millionaire/asshole/real mother fucker/piece of shit; you can understand why my father is the way he is and perhaps why i am the way i am, but maybe this is a bunny trail, but this dose have to do with my relationship with god, and i suppose as children we are paying for our ancestors mistakes, but it is also on us to break the cycle as my father tried so hard to do by teaching us everything he did, but it seems as far as we try to escape the tree we rarely get far carrying on a legacy whether we know it or not.. i don't know sorry for the jumble of thought...

  I gusse after all this, and there's alot more i just don't have the time nor writing capabilities to put it all down, the point is i am still lost i want so badly in this time a God something i can rely on something that is perhaps more persistent than loneliness. Yet my rational mind wont allow me to go further with any belief, i don't know where to start or how to start over, i don't know if i must believe in a God to go on, or if i did how would i see him any different from the God that i was taught.. needless to say i am more confused then spiritual which closely resemble each other... anyway thanks for reading this good topic:thumbup:

Edited by CaptainCrunch (11/09/09 02:11 AM)

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Re: My life without god [Re: MushroomTrip]
    #11416532 -

This seems your talking about beleif in free will & its effects on the psyche
You didn't like the idea of decisions being controlled by a supreme being, you prefer the idea 'you' are in control of decisions
Different ideas make different people feel different ways

Myself having investigated what 'I' is
Have the feeling decisions simply happen by themselves, they are in & of the same environment over which the decision is being made, its inseparable
There is no separate 'decision maker' outside of the environment over which decisions are being made
Its all happening by itself, the real neurosis (IMO) is that "'I' am doing it"
Its happening by itself, nobody has ownership over the universe functioning


Nothing in the objective world will give evidence for anything other than itself


How would it feel to see that every decision you 'think' your making has already been decided by the subconscious 6 seconds earlier?





--------------------

Edited by Chronic7 (11/09/09 03:41 AM)

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Re: My life without god [Re: MushroomTrip]
    #11416671 -

Good to hear that your life belongs to you and only you. However, and this is a more philosophical question, if your life really did belong to you, then no-one or nothing could take it from you. And yet, when death comes we will all have to surrender 'our' life anyway.
So, yes we should free our life from being 'owned' by others, but at the same time realise we have our life 'on loan' from nature so to speak... :leafromp:

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Re: My life without god [Re: Chronic7]
    #11416693 -

Quote:
Nothing in the objective world will give evidence for anything other than itself



Did I say otherwise? I simply said that, from my perspective, spending a great deal of time, especially in the past, actively looking for signs of existence of a god, I couldn't find anything that pointed to his existence.

Quote:
This seems your talking about belief in free will & its effects on the psyche



No, I am talking about my own experience as a kid with a specific notion of god, in a specific context, and how irrational thinking can lead to a great deal of anxiety and abandonment of self-control. I used god as an example because in my case it was an issue that appeared and re-appeared and has influenced the way I chose to live my life, but I thought I made it clear enough that the same thing goes for any kind of blind belief one can possess.
I set myself free from suffering and anxiety not when I stopped believing in god, but when I started thinking about what real evidence there is to support the claims of the Christian dogma I was raised in, when I chose to put my mind through the trials of reality, and when I decided to simply refuse to feel miserable anymore.

Quote:
You didn't like the idea of decisions being controlled by a supreme being, you prefer the idea 'you' are in control of decisions



Correction: I didn't like the idea of a being of any kind dictating my life and setting parameters for it. Until now no "supreme" being came to me to tell me how to live my life, it was only other people that have done that, in the name of a supposedly-existent supreme being. The fact that I didn't like this idea has determined me to look around me and analyze the nature of this belief, and somewhere along the road I came to the conclusion that there were far more chances that the whole idea is nothing but an invention, than there were chances for it to be true. Another conclusion I came to was that I am indeed in control of myself, and the decisions I take, even though they are limited by the nature of reality.

Quote:
Different ideas make different people feel different ways



duh...


--------------------
:bunny::bunnyhug:
All this time I've loved you
And never known your face
All this time I've missed you
And searched this human race
Here is true peace
Here my heart knows calm
Safe in your soul
Bathed in your sighs

:bunnyhug: :yinyang2:

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Re: My life without god [Re: Chronic7]
    #11416702 -

Quote:
How would it feel to see that every decision you 'think' your making has already been decided by the subconscious 6 seconds earlier?



And what's this supposed to mean? Last time I checked, my subconscious was still mine, which would still make the decision MINE.
I find it funny how some people act like they have discovered some hidden meaning on the human nature when they learn minimal things about the brain. :lol:


--------------------
:bunny::bunnyhug:
All this time I've loved you
And never known your face
All this time I've missed you
And searched this human race
Here is true peace
Here my heart knows calm
Safe in your soul
Bathed in your sighs

:bunnyhug: :yinyang2:

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Re: My life without god [Re: Ahimsa]
    #11416750 -

Ahimsa said:
Good to hear that your life belongs to you and only you. However, and this is a more philosophical question, if your life really did belong to you, then no-one or nothing could take it from you. And yet, when death comes we will all have to surrender 'our' life anyway.



How in the world did you make such a connection between things?
It's sort of like saying, if cherries are indeed red, how do they end up rotting and having a dark color when they do?

You make it sound like nature is a person who gives you this life with a contract, and that one of it's clauses is for us, humans, to agree to surrender our life to death, eventually.


--------------------
:bunny::bunnyhug:
All this time I've loved you
And never known your face
All this time I've missed you
And searched this human race
Here is true peace
Here my heart knows calm
Safe in your soul
Bathed in your sighs

:bunnyhug: :yinyang2:

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Re: My life without god [Re: MushroomTrip]
    #11416761 -

MushroomTrip said:
Ahimsa said:
Good to hear that your life belongs to you and only you. However, and this is a more philosophical question, if your life really did belong to you, then no-one or nothing could take it from you. And yet, when death comes we will all have to surrender 'our' life anyway.



How in the world did you make such a connection between things?
It's sort of like saying, if cherries are indeed red, how do they end up rotting and having a dark color when they do?

You make it sound like nature is a person who gives you this life with a contract, and that one of it's clauses is for us, humans, to agree to surrender our life to death, eventually.



I don't understand what you are trying to say. Could you explain it in more simpler terms please?

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Re: My life without god [Re: Ahimsa]
    #11416763 -

Ahimsa said:
Good to hear that your life belongs to you and only you. However, and this is a more philosophical question, if your life really did belong to you, then no-one or nothing could take it from you.



The conclusion to your philosophical question isn't based in sound reasoning when one considers the nature of the concept of belonging or ownership. I don't understand how you can make an appeal to “if something "really" belongs to you it cannot be taken away from you” when there's nothing in the concept of belonging or ownership itself that specifies that ownership cannot be negated or taken away anyways. Utilizing the qualifier ”really” to convey such a point is a fallacy. :wink:


--------------------
:redpanda:
If I should die this very moment
I wouldn't fear
For I've never known completeness
Like being here
Wrapped in the warmth of you
Loving every breath of you

:heartpump: :bunnyhug: :yinyang:

:yinyang: :levitate: :earth: :levitate: :yinyang:

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Re: My life without god [Re: fireworks_god]
    #11416771 -

Oh, so you mean there is a difference between your life being 'owned' by someone and your life 'belonging' to someone? Is that it?

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Re: My life without god [Re: Ahimsa]
    #11416809 -

Ahimsa said:
I don't understand what you are trying to say. Could you explain it in more simpler terms please?



I am saying that it doesn't make sense to give human attributes to nature and death, as if they were the ones who gave your life to you (nature) and will take it away from you (death).
Life is a process, and like any process it has different stages, and that's all there is to it really. It doesn't mean that the nature of this process implies that your life belongs in fact to someone else than yourself, it only means that everything that exists changes. :mushroom2:


--------------------
:bunny::bunnyhug:
All this time I've loved you
And never known your face
All this time I've missed you
And searched this human race
Here is true peace
Here my heart knows calm
Safe in your soul
Bathed in your sighs

:bunnyhug: :yinyang2:

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Re: My life without god [Re: MushroomTrip]
    #11416812 -

Cool thread, I went through a similar experience but kinda the other way around. I didn't believe in God and used to go through mental hell because of what other people might think. But now that I believe in God I know everyone thinks the same and everyone thinks about God and either believes or not believes in him and based on how people see God they live their life and even think their thoughts. It seems to me God is the most important aspect of everyone's thinking no matter who they are or what they believe in. So now that I take God into account into my thinking, as a concept, I can now understand peoples behavior, why they act like they do, why some are assholes for no apparent reason.. it's all about their hate or love towards the concept God, weather you like it or not God is always in your thoughts, it's like a computer virus. You always feel judged in each thought you think. So whos there judging you?

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Re: My life without god [Re: Ahimsa]
    #11416832 -

Ahimsa said:
Oh, so you mean there is a difference between your life being 'owned' by someone and your life 'belonging' to someone? Is that it?



No, that isn't it, and if I had meant to say that I would have expressly stated as much. I really don't see anything cryptic in what I wrote.
The concept of ownership doesn't include any definition that suggests that whatever it is that is owned cannot be taken away, nullified, or lost. A brief look at anything that we commonly consider to be "owned" will make this all the more clear.
Therefore, to suggest that something isn't "really" owned because it can be taken away doesn't make any sense, because there isn't any aspect of the concept of ownership itself that suggests it cannot be lost, nullified, or taken away.


--------------------
:redpanda:
If I should die this very moment
I wouldn't fear
For I've never known completeness
Like being here
Wrapped in the warmth of you
Loving every breath of you

:heartpump: :bunnyhug: :yinyang:

:yinyang: :levitate: :earth: :levitate: :yinyang:

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Re: My life without god [Re: Diaboleros]
    #11416865 -

Quote:
It seems to me God is the most important aspect of everyone's thinking no matter who they are or what they believe in.



How did you determine this? Are you in the minds of other people?

Quote:
So now that I take God into account into my thinking, as a concept, I can now understand peoples behavior, why they act like they do, why some are assholes for no apparent reason..



How does taking god into consideration help you understand why people behave in certain ways? Can you elaborate on the process of "understanding"?

Quote:
it's all about their hate or love towards the concept God



:lol:
What a foolish thought to think that there's only love and hate, first of all.
Secondly, at the risk of repeating myself, can you expand more on this thought of yours?

Quote:
weather you like it or not God is always in your thoughts



Prove it.

Is this also the same for people who are raised in a culture that doesn't mention anything about god?
Also, the idea of god differs so much not only from individual to individual, but also from religion to religion and culture to culture, that simply naming all that stuff "god" seems senseless to me. Taking this into account, you're saying that everybody has something in their thoughts, even thought that something is different from person to person.

Quote:
You always feel judged in each thought you think.



I don't I have no idea what you're talking about, are you using the general you, or what?


--------------------
:bunny::bunnyhug:
All this time I've loved you
And never known your face
All this time I've missed you
And searched this human race
Here is true peace
Here my heart knows calm
Safe in your soul
Bathed in your sighs

:bunnyhug: :yinyang2:

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Re: My life without god [Re: MushroomTrip]
    #11417032 -

MushroomTrip said:
Quote:
How would it feel to see that every decision you 'think' your making has already been decided by the subconscious 6 seconds earlier?



And what's this supposed to mean? Last time I checked, my subconscious was still mine, which would still make the decision MINE.




By the time 'you' are making the decision, its already been made, you just think your making the decision
Its already happening, you then just say 'im doing it' ontop of whats already happening...
If it is an already happening process, then how isit 'MINE'?

Quote:
I find it funny how some people act like they have discovered some hidden meaning on the human nature when they learn minimal things about the brain. :lol:




Yep thats me :thumbup: :rolleyes:

Ive learned what i have about the psyche through deep introspection, not through books or documentaries
This sort of documentary just backs it up, yet still fails to recognize what 'I' or 'Consciousness' really is

What that video is talking about compared to most psyche documentaries is not 'minimal'
When your starting to ask quesitons about consciousness & intent then its not minimal, its fundamental


--------------------

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Re: My life without god [Re: Noteworthy]
    #11417299 -

Noteworthy said:
I thank my mother because she never imposed any belief system on my except by telling me her values and our family's values.

I understood from an early age that there were different opinions about praising god, because different parts of my family had different denominations (catholic, and orthadox, and the anglican school I went to).

When I was young, I accepted the concept of God just because everyone seemed to take it for granted.

However what I could not understand was where people were making their claims. Once accepting the notion of God, it seemed ridiculous that this all pwoerful being would require anything of me.. because it would clearly know what I think and how I feel and that I am a good person. Religion became, to me, a matter of pleasing eachother and reminding eachother that we are after the same things in life. People went to church to convince eachother that they were good people. This was the sort of thing I began thinking around 5, when my mother married an atheist.

He and my new step siblings did not go to church or celebrate anything religious but were good people, and very smart people, who taught me about science, mathematics, and computers. My notions of god slipped away, and I stopped respecting religion and saw people not only as trying to prove something to eachother but more importantly just trying to prove something to themselves. I felt annoyed that I had been told things about god as if they were real only to find out that other people on earth have other equally valid (invalid) explinations for why we are here.

As I developed into an adolescent, my grasp on science improved, and throughout highschool I was fascinated in learning how science could explain the 'true' nature of the universe.

My interest in science led me to my interest in biology and evolution.

my interest in these led to my interest in the mind, in the brain. This could only happen when I was older, around 14/15. I heard things about chemicals in teh brain and nerve impulses and all this stuff and it sounded like a cool sort of organic computer.

I started playing with consciousness by drinking alcohol and by hypoerventilating, etc. By 16 I tried marijuana and that was a launch pad for my fascination with psychology, mental illness, and 'reality'.

This led to my interest in Logic and Philosophy, something that I only became significantly interested in by around 18 when I had started university and realised that a lot of things that I thought were just ways of seeing the world and deriving information from it, were actually considered to be philosophical concepts that people studied and argued about.

When I really started applying logic to areas of science, it showed me that dispite being the logical highground, science cannot magically become perfect with logic - logic can never prove its own premises. a lot of people who were scientific or at least, claimed to not be religious, constantly made claims about the way the world was, as if these claims were sound, by the laws of science. But these claims were merely 'better' than the religious claims.

Over the last few years I have probed the world that is available to me and it has become clear that God is as likely as he is unlikely. there trully is no way of assessing the likeliness of god.

It is obvious that depictions of god given in ancient books are bogus and have been embellished over the ages from origins that wre much less specific or grandiose.

The fact that God represents all that we do not understand about the universe is very significant because, there will always be more we don't understand, about the source of ourselves, where we are going, how we judge good and bad, etc.  BUT we will also always have an emotional connection to those questions, and someone will always demand some sort of answer to these questions in order to justify moral stances.


There is, now, a 'religion of science' that takes 'the best science' to be the truth. And this is, on principle, as illogical as many religions.

Now I have an open view on life. My psychedelic experiences have shown me so many things that baffle scientists. Namely, consciousness itself. Whether or not God is real does not really matter.. what matters is that we don't know.

What I think should be understood about God is, however, that the only way that God can expect anything of humans, and thus force people to watch their steps and evade hell, is if god in fact is not a perfect, loving being. And if god is not a perfect loving being, fuck him. It is likely that he is just using us to some evil end and it is likely that existance is meant to be, overall, difficult and painful.

So the only reasonable deduction about god is that, if he exists, and is worth honouring,
then the best way to honour him is to keep doing what we are doing, following the feelings that we feel, and doing whatever we think ought to be done.




Beautiful use of a mind. :thumbup:


--------------------
"Don't believe everything you think". -Anom.

" All that lives was born to die"-Anom.

With much wisdom comes much sorrow,
The more knowledge, the more grief.
Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC

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Re: My life without god [Re: fireworks_god]
    #11417406 -

fireworks_god said:
Ahimsa said:
Oh, so you mean there is a difference between your life being 'owned' by someone and your life 'belonging' to someone? Is that it?



No, that isn't it, and if I had meant to say that I would have expressly stated as much. I really don't see anything cryptic in what I wrote.
The concept of ownership doesn't include any definition that suggests that whatever it is that is owned cannot be taken away, nullified, or lost. A brief look at anything that we commonly consider to be "owned" will make this all the more clear.
Therefore, to suggest that something isn't "really" owned because it can be taken away doesn't make any sense, because there isn't any aspect of the concept of ownership itself that suggests it cannot be lost, nullified, or taken away.



We have a different idea about the meaning of 'ownership'. :undecided:

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Re: My life without god [Re: Ahimsa]
    #11417595 -

Care to elucidate, perchance, which type of objects or states one could own, then, consistent with your conception of ownership?


--------------------
:redpanda:
If I should die this very moment
I wouldn't fear
For I've never known completeness
Like being here
Wrapped in the warmth of you
Loving every breath of you

:heartpump: :bunnyhug: :yinyang:

:yinyang: :levitate: :earth: :levitate: :yinyang:

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Re: My life without god [Re: fireworks_god]
    #11417664 -

If one owns something then it cannot be taken away. Since there are no such things, there is no 'ownership' in that sense of the word. There is possession perhaps, meaning that one is in some way connected, but never to the extend that that connection can never be changed.

If Mushroomtrip was being 'owned' by God then that is a sorry case. One has to be free from such constraining influences to be able to realise ones self i feel.

But now, if one says that one 'owns' oneself then that can only be meant symbolic to indicate one's freedom from external 'ownership'. Therefore one might want to remember that one's self-ownership is not absolute. One remains bound by the forces of nature, and no-one is free from death.

Unlike God, death doesn't impose such restraints. Or does it?

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Re: My life without god [Re: Ahimsa]
    #11417708 -

If one owns something then it cannot be taken away.

You can't take away my "true essense" :hissyfit:

Just ask Chronic. He knows.


--------------------
"Don't believe everything you think". -Anom.

" All that lives was born to die"-Anom.

With much wisdom comes much sorrow,
The more knowledge, the more grief.
Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC

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Re: My life without god [Re: Icelander]
    #11417734 -

Just when you thought it was all over...
There is no 'true essence' apart from everything else.

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Shop: Myyco.com Isolated Cubensis Liquid Culture For Sale   Unfolding Nature Unfolding Nature: Being in the Implicate Order


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