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White lies
    #1221795 -

They are evil!  They lead to nothing good. 
Think about it...

"No, you're not fat at all."

...Makes you sound nice, but makes the person, who really is fat, think that he/she doesn't need to excercise or change their diet at all.  So they go on being fat and lead a sad, lonely life.

If only someone would've told them! :frown:

Or how 'bout this...

I have this friend who I wish wasn't my friend.  I didn't realize until after I became "friends" with him that he was the most annoying person in the world, and now I am stuck in a situation where I am forced to hang out with him or risk being the asshole who says "I don't want to be friends with you anymore."

But by lying to him and pretending that I still like him and like to hang out with him, although the intentions are nice, really makes my life a living hell sometimes.  I guess I need to learn to be more selfish.

To me, a person who makes white lies a lot is a very fake person.

The truth is out there... Find it!

-RebelSteve 


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Namaste.

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Re: White lies [Re: RebelSteve33]
    #1221861 -

Bro, I hear ya...

I'm back and forth on this one. :confused:


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Note: In desperate need of a cure...

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Re: White lies [Re: RebelSteve33]
    #1221869 -

You can't exist in society and be 100% honest to everyone all the time.


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RIP Acidic_Sloth

Sunset_Mission said:
"larry the scary rex
verily scary when thoroughly vexed
invoke the shadows and dust, cast a hex
mercifully massacring memories masterfully
relocate from Ur to 8th density and become a cosmic bully
mulder and scully couldn't decipher his glyphs
invoke the shadows and dust, smoke infernal spliffs"
April 24th 2011

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Re: White lies [Re: RebelSteve33]
    #1221885 -

I hope you're not down with Kant... for your sake.


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Note: In desperate need of a cure...

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Re: White lies [Re: RebelSteve33]
    #1221914 -

It's not being selfish to tell him you don't want to be his friend, it's being honest with yourself. You are much more important than the people in YOUR life, especially since this person is bringing you down. Trust your instincts and don't let someone or something else dictate. Good luck . . .


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you have nothing unless you have nothing

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Re: White lies [Re: RebelSteve33]
    #1222380 -

HELLO !!! CABLE GUY !!!! DO YOU WANT TO BE MY BUDY ?!?!
Invent some excuse, just start getting away from him. I know what you feel, i've been in the same situation, i just told him i needed more time to myself.

MAIA


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Spiritual being, living a human experience ... The Shroomery Mandala



Use, do not abuse; neither abstinence nor excess ever renders man happy.
Voltaire

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Re: White lies [Re: MAIA]
    #1222456 -

i think that was just an example about the friend, but i've been in that situation and i agrea nothing good comes from a white lie. atleast nothing universally good, know what i'm sayin?


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KB

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Re: White lies [Re: RebelSteve33]
    #1222577 -

I think the goal of a white lie is the hope that one can avoid a small pang of unessecary uncomfortablness on either side of the lie. If a person gets away with this lie and the lie is sucessfull, then nobody feels any emotional pain and life goes on.



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focusing
Flow
The Enneagram

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Re: White lies [Re: David_Scape]
    #1222662 -

True. But what if you just tell a little white lie & you think there is no harm done... but then you find that you have to tell another small lie to cover the other one & it just keeps going. Then what?


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I know what you want, I can give it to you.

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Re: White lies [Re: TeTr0]
    #1222710 -

Well then your lies arent going very well... But, perhaps you have a more specific example?


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focusing
Flow
The Enneagram

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Re: White lies [Re: David_Scape]
    #1222725 -

lol... I don't really have an example. I wasn't meaning that I lie about stuff & my lies get uncovered. I just meant in general. What if you told a small, stupid lie to a friend & they ask you something more specific about it. You then have to come up with another lie to cover that one, ya know what I mean? You would either have to tell that person that you lied to being with, or make up more lies to cover the other lies. That can get tricky if you lie a lot & don't cover them up too well... you know what I mean?


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I know what you want, I can give it to you.

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Re: White lies [Re: RebelSteve33]
    #1223537 -

MAN I HATE WHITE LIES TOO. FUCK.. I MEAN IF THERE'S SOMETHING TO GET OUT, SAY IT. Telling the truth is a lot better than beating around the bush to me that is.

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Re: White lies [Re: TeTr0]
    #1223571 -

True. But what if you just tell a little white lie & you think there is no harm done... but then you find that you have to tell another small lie to cover the other one & it just keeps going

"oh, what a tangled web we weave........", or words to that effect, sound familiar? :grin: 


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"Being crazier than a shithouse rat is not sufficient grounds for banishment"


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Re: White lies [Re: RebelSteve33]
    #1223595 -

Quote:
I have this friend who I wish wasn't my friend. I didn't realize until after I became "friends" with him that he was the most annoying person in the world, and now I am stuck in a situation where I am forced to hang out with him or risk being the asshole who says "I don't want to be friends with you anymore."



Why are you forced to hang out with him? Fear of guilt? If he's making your life worse, why keep him in it? That's the way I see it.


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Re: White lies [Re: RebelSteve33]
    #1223620 -

I made a promise to myself back when I was around 17 to try to not lie anymore.

I've certainly lied since then, but I do make a conscious effort to NOT lie, even if it is going to make things easier for me.

For instance, I recently failed a drug test, and will not contest it - I simply told the dr. when he called "yup. I smoke marijuana, so that might explain the results."


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Insert an "I think" mentally in front of eveything I say that seems sketchy, because I certainly don't KNOW much. Also; feel free to yell at me.
In addition: SHPONGLE

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Re: White lies [Re: RebelSteve33]
    #1223830 -

the problem is not in you trying to find a lie... it is not a question of honesty. the real issue at hand, is why does your friend annoy you? i personally believe it possible to enjoy any situation, if you just look at it from the right angle. not that i'm always happy, because im not perfect. nowhere near. but i have learned to appreciate annoying people a lot more. Try to look deeper into them. Look into their eyes, and find what they're thinking.

If you dont feel like appreciating yer buddy, then you can either lie, or not lie. I suggest lieing. Its a sacrifice you make for the sake of someone elses ignorance... But then again, i always think of blatant ignorance as a bad thing.

So I guess the only solution hear, that will yield no unpleasant results, is to learn to appreciate your friend. and trust me, it is DEFINITELY possible.

except for this one time, this kid who thinks me and my friend love him or something kept throwing paper airplanes at me from the seat next to me in class.... and i'm considered the most nonviolent guy in school mind you... i got up, went to the stack of textbooks, picked one up, walked up to him, and hit him repeatedly with him, then got his airplanes, and jabbed them into his ears and face. that was so much fun. but it fucked my ... um... bliss, if you will... just be happy

i dont know why i made this so long....


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"I think it's time we stop
Children, What's the sound,
Everybody look what's going down"

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Re: White lies [Re: RebelSteve33]
    #1225248 -

> I have this friend who I wish wasn't my friend. I didn't realize until after I became "friends" with him that he was the most annoying person in the world, and now I am stuck in a situation where I am forced to hang out with him or risk being the asshole who says "I don't want to be friends with you anymore."


I have been in this situation before & belive me, it is way better to just let that person know how you feel! I was friends with this girl who was without a doubt in my mind a pathological lier. Does anyone know how aggravating it is to be lied to about everything & anything... no matter how fucking stupid it may be? This girl didn't understand what it meant to tell the truth! I got so fed up with all the lies she told & actually believed that I just told her straight up that I was done with the bullshit, goodbye. I mean, I felt a little bad for her, but at the same time I knew that no matter what I did (I tried so many things to get her to understand!) that she was not going to change & I knew that I didn't want to deal with all that crap. It may seem harsh, but why should you just pretend to like someone & hang around with them all the time when you really don't want to? You just have to do what you feel is best for you.



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I know what you want, I can give it to you.

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Re: White lies [Re: TeTr0]
    #1226613 -

i compleyle understand what your saying about your "friend"

i just got out of a friendship. he too was anoying as hell, and never respected my personal space,( i really hate it when people poke/hug/touch me) i would try to tlka to him about it nicely, and nothing would change. i tryed to just let it go, but enough was enough, i told him i didn't want to be his friend, i was hoenst, and got labled the bitch for it, for a long time, just now is everyone seeing that i only told the truth. how it made me feel.

it's hard always trying to be truthful, it gets mixed up with being mean. but they are completly different things. i try to be copmletly hoenest with people, but at the same, i try to respect what they feel as well.

being truthfull is a challange, but i think in the end, you form stronger relationships with those who count


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What fun is it in Nirvana while other beings are suffering?

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Re: White lies [Re: soylent_green]
    #1227110 -

Quote:
being truthfull is a challange, but i think in the end, you form stronger relationships with those who count


I agree 100%

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Re: White lies [Re: soylent_green]
    #1227135 -

Wise words, my friend. Very wise indeed. [heart]


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