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Anonymous

Post deleted by Anno
    #3036886 - 08/22/04 07:06 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)



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Offlinenicechrisman
Interdimensional space wizard
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Re: What is a guru [Re: ]
    #3036983 - 08/22/04 07:31 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

A guru is a spiritual teacher. Almost anybody who claims to be one is full of it IMO. That's not to say that they aren't out there, but you gotta be careful about anybody who claims to be one.


--------------------
"Cosmic Love is absolutelely ruthless and highly indifferent:
it teaches its lessons whether you like/dislike them or not."

John C. Lily

 


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OfflineFrog
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Re: What is a guru [Re: nicechrisman]
    #3037004 - 08/22/04 07:35 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

My guru doesn't claim to be a guru. My guru is just so smart and knows answers to all my questions about life and the universe so that I call him "my guru".

And he doesn't just have answers. He lives what he teaches.


--------------------
The day will come when, after harnessing the ether, the winds, the tides, gravitation, we shall harness for God the energies of love. And, on that day, for the second time in the history of the world, man will have discovered fire.  -Teilard


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InvisibleSwami
Eggshell Walker

Registered: 01/19/00
Posts: 15,413
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Re: What is a guru [Re: ]
    #3037009 - 08/22/04 07:36 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

A swami.


--------------------



The proof is in the pudding.


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InvisibleHuehuecoyotl
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Re: What is a guru [Re: ]
    #3037146 - 08/22/04 08:10 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

There are no gurus. Any one claiming to be one is merely feeding their ego by increasing their self importance. We all have something to teach...and we all have something to learn. We are our own gurus truly.


Edited by Huehuecoyotl (08/22/04 10:47 PM)


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Invisiblekaiowas
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Re: What is a guru [Re: Huehuecoyotl]
    #3037154 - 08/22/04 08:11 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

life is our guru and all of us are apart of it.


--------------------
Annnnnnd I had a light saber and my friend was there and I said "you look like an indian" and he said "you look like satan" and he found a stick and a rock and he named the rock ooga booga and he named the stick Stick and we both thought that was pretty funny. We got eaten alive by mosquitos but didn't notice til the next day. I stepped on some glass while wading in the swamp and cut my foot open, didn't bother me til the next day either....yeah it was a good time, ended the night by buying some liquor for minors and drinking nips and going to he diner and eating chicken fingers, and then I went home and went to bed.---senior doobie


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OfflineMarkostheGnostic
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Re: What is a guru [Re: ]
    #3037163 - 08/22/04 08:14 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

I recommend the book BE HERE NOW which profiles a 'Sat' Guru by the name of Neem Karoli Baba. Remarkable story, remarkable being. Hari Dass Baba was an 'Upa' Guru. The former 'teaches' by his 'being' ['sat'], while the latter type teaches formally. Gurus belong to Hindu tradition.


--------------------
γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself


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InvisibleSwami
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Re: What is a guru [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #3037173 - 08/22/04 08:18 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

The way to test if your guru is for real or not is to give him 1000 mcg. of LSD and see how he responds. :smile:


--------------------



The proof is in the pudding.


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Offlinedaba
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Re: What is a guru [Re: Swami]
    #3037213 - 08/22/04 08:35 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

Swami said:
The way to test if your guru is for real or not is to give him 1000 mcg. of LSD and see how he responds. :smile:




915 mcg to be exact.

"... that little scientist in me says, 'This is going to be very interesting!'

"All day long I'm there, and every now and then he twinkles at me and nothing--nothing happens! That was his answer to my question. Now you have the data I have."


--------------------
Fold for The Shroomery!


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Offlinedaba
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Re: What is a guru [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #3037225 - 08/22/04 08:38 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

Quote:

MarkostheGnostic said:
I recommend the book BE HERE NOW which profiles a 'Sat' Guru by the name of Neem Karoli Baba. Remarkable story, remarkable being. Hari Dass Baba was an 'Upa' Guru. The former 'teaches' by his 'being' ['sat'], while the latter type teaches formally. Gurus belong to Hindu tradition.




Beat me to it.

You can find the book easily by its purple cover. The pages are brown, sandwiched by two layers of white sheets.

The formal name is:

BE HERE NOW by Dr. Richard Alpert INTO BABA RAM DASS

I recommend this read as well.


--------------------
Fold for The Shroomery!


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OfflineMarkostheGnostic
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Re: What is a guru [Re: daba]
    #3037243 - 08/22/04 08:45 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

Right on to you AND Swami. Later Neem Karolie took 1200 mcg because he knew that Ram Dass thought that he had tossed them over his shoulder. And still, nothing happened (well, probably some stimulation occurred, but it didn't show him anything 'more').


--------------------
γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself


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OfflineMarkostheGnostic
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Re: What is a guru [Re: daba]
    #3037254 - 08/22/04 08:51 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

Yep, the book changed my life. I still have two vintage copies ($3.33), a vinyl purple and white sign in my meditation room, and a tee-shirt! I've been giving it away for 31 years now, and still use it. If, after all this time I can still read it with 'new' eyes, then I 'Know' that I am becoming the lesson it teaches - which has been my goal all along.


--------------------
γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself


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InvisibleHuehuecoyotl
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Re: What is a guru [Re: ]
    #3037754 - 08/22/04 11:00 PM (12 years, 3 months ago)

Here is some wisdom from the late Frank Zappa:

The mystery man came over
And he said "I'm outta sight!"
He said for a nominal service charge
I could reach nirvana tonight
If I was ready, willing and able
To pay him his regular fee
He would drop all the rest of
His pressing affairs and devote
His attention to me

But I said "Look here brother
who you jiving with that cosmik debris?
Now who you jiving with that cosmik debris?
Look here brother, don't waste your time on me"

The mystery man got nervous
And he fidget around a bit
He reached in the pocket of his mystery robe
And he whipped out a shaving kit
Now I thought it was a razor
And a can of foaming goo
But he told me right then when the top popped open
There was nothin' his box won't do
With the oil of Aphrodite, and the dust of the Grand Wazoo
He said "You might not believe this, little fella
But it'll cure your asthma too"

And I said "Look here brother
Who you jiving with that cosmik debris?
Now what kind of a guru are you, anyway?
Look here brother, don't waste your time on me"
*(Don't waste your time)*

"I've got troubles of my own", I said
"And you can't help me out
So, take your meditations and your preparations
And ram it up your snout!"
"But I got the crystal ball", he said
And held it to the light
So I snatched it, all away from him
And I showed him how to do it right

I wrapped a newspaper 'round my head
So I looked like I was deep
I said some mumbo-jumbo, then
I told him he was going to sleep
I robbed his rings and pocketwatch
And everything else I found
I had that sucker hypnotized
He couldn't even make a sound
I proceeded to tell him his future, then
As long as he was hanging around
I said "The price of meat has just gone up
And your old lady has just gone down!"

And I said "Look here brother-who you
Jiving with that cosmik debris?
Now is that a real poncho or is that a Sears poncho?
Don't you know, you could make more money as a butcher?
So, don't waste your time on me"
Don't waste it, don't waste your time on me


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Offlinegnrm23
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Re: What is a guru [Re: ]
    #3038696 - 08/23/04 08:30 AM (12 years, 3 months ago)

gee
you
are
you


--------------------
old enough to know better
not old enough to care


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