Lets start with the most ignored Oracle of Cyberspace:
http://www.dictionary.com
If you want quick reference on the meaning of a word, translate foreign gibberish into gibberish you can at least try to interpret, or the other way around check that site out!
(I mailed with a Japanese girl thru E-J autotranslation: she said it was all Chinese to her so I said pardon my french  )
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e?go ( P ) Pronunciation Key (g, g)
n. pl. e?gos
1.The self, especially as distinct from the world and other selves.
2.In psychoanalysis, the division of the psyche that is conscious, most immediately controls thought and behavior, and is most in touch with external reality.
3.An exaggerated sense of self-importance; conceit.
4.Appropriate pride in oneself; self-esteem.
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If you discount psychoanalysis and go for definition 1 the Ego is the "you" that not only decides you need to take a leak but locates the bathroom and unzips your fly. An ego seems pretty essential in this definition, if only to prevent embarassment should it return after the peak finding you in a puddle and the center of attention 
Orion, I'm going straight for your starting post..
The way you define crazy is that you cannot understand it and see no point to it all. This means to me you are questioning the core of everything (God/Cosmos/Life Itself) and that i want to poke my nose into.
Striving for Religious-Scientific (Wiccan-Seeker) Insight I am by no means offended! Let me pas some personal dogmatic gas in your general direction before getting on your case 
Here are my personal definitions, where Sci and Re shook hands for now. Please brace for impact and take it one concept at a time because I'm shoving a whole beliefs system up your gullet, 99% of the tech bits wiped off to keep this post on one thread page.
To me the highest force is The All-Encompassing One. This means that the sum of absolutely everything that can ever exist in any way will do so into Infinity. The High One never devided us from the whole: It IS the whole. Nothing is seperate from the Divine. Everything is of equal value, is ESSENTIAL as a consequence of the "laws of nature" which are absolute and interact like cogwheels in a clock.
This will give you a splitting headache so only read the following if you have the stomach for it:
From the outside a black hole is an infinitely small point of infinite density. From the *inside* however it is infinitely large and dense. Such is the nature of our Universe if you let all time merge into one: all things possible are present everywhere. A string of Time is the artist that carves the present out of the block of marble which is the timeless universe. Cause --> Effect makes things progress through the string of time into all eternity, for time is like the serpent that bit its tail: a circle with beginning nor end where everything follows its predestined path. The part of a human that is the "ME" is among this too and travels forever along this all-encompassing path, propelled and steered by cause and effect and the balance in things we call "The Law of Probability" in class and "karma" when on LSD.
You are Eternal and will encompass all which lies in the realm of possibilities of any form that can contain the "ME"-form called Soul.
Since I found no reason yet to believe in seperate souls, I conclude that all sentient beings carry OUR VERY SOUL (You = Me in another form) and that we ARE the "GODSOUL", each in one of our many guises. The sum of all Sentience is the Divine Sentience, Which means that when all time merges into One, you do not only have Infinite Matter, but Infinite Form, Infinite Change, Infinite Time, Infinite Knowledge and Infinite Soul present troughout the Infinity of our Universe, Total Interconnectedness from which our knowledge is seperated only by the string of time in which we live.
(I think half reading this are either hitting a bong or popping a tylenol by now. I know it sucks but I can't help I write and think that way )
Well in my universe you play your part and nothing more and your mind is but a tiny yet essential part of the whole that makes you and your life for what it is. (if you think you can use this theory to waive all responsibility and do as you please you have misunderstood, because it rather equates your freedom of choice to zero, making "responsibility" and "freedom of choice" concepts that statistically are often found between human ears but are just thought concepts. You're NOT a clock you arrogant little cogwheel 
My opinion is my own and makes me happier and more pleasant (unless I try to explain it!) for others. Your opinion burdens you with inner conflict however: your use of negative words seems to me you'd want to call the Helpdesk and demand they fix your God, hoping the warranty isnt expired after 15 billion years 
Following the concept of free will I think its in your beliefs. That you developed beliefs of your own while some old ones that should better be reshaped are left. This is exactly why Windows sucks: internal inconsistencies in the program make it glitch every time. Glitches are unpleasant.
I can do nothing but tell you to look for your new answers, as only you yourself can find them and I believe personal spiritual discovery is one of the big thrills of life. Don't cram other people's ideas up your head and really think about things as long as it's reward increases to you and those around you.
Personally I get the impression you picture God as a sadistic dude chasing ants with the Divine Fire of a magnifying glass.
(exaggerated, ok!) It seems not the kind of thought that makes you feel better. If you feel that you have an Instinct x Conscience conflict which makes you suffer I step back cautiously. A priest can have such a conflict about masturbation, in this case I say tug it, because I see no human-to-Lifeform harm being done. But a serial killer might have had the same dilemma and decided to go for his "instinct" too. You see?
What you should ask yourself is whether harm is done to others or yourself if you did or didn't do "it". Because I don't know the nature of your dilemma I can't coach you either way.
If you want to play gross dirty sexgames with a consenting adult where none gets victimized, it might be OK. If somebody comitted murder and you want to report it to the cops -but its dad-, then I say the greater good would likely be to make the call. But if you want to beat somebody up for their evil wrongdoings or choke a cat in foreplay I say NO because no inner torment of yours can justify hitting the dude or killing the cat, especially since your act will make YOU less happy in the long run too. (Read my thingie in the "Gays and the Bible" thread for my opinion on Right and Wrong in all matters, or if you get horribly vexed PM me to sit in completely partial and subjective judgement over your dilemma. Its good to read you got this conflict but it not just means you listen to urges, but state to have an active conscience too which really is a great asset.
Nothing is likely proven so its all about beliefs!
If new beliefs make you less functional and happifying to yourself and others you should abandon them before becoming someone who sucks.
Word has it nothing has ever been really proven, which means to me that any belief more joy-spreading for you and all around you is more valuable then a less desirable belief which may be the "Ultimate Truth" but which never can be proven anyway.
What do we all want? The Good Feeling! Chase that, its a "truth" that's good enough for me!
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