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Shop: Myyco.com Golden Teacher Liquid Culture For Sale   Unfolding Nature Unfolding Nature: Being in the Implicate Order

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Swami visited by the Spiritual Police
    #1818239 -

*knock knock*

(Sound of drugs being flushed down the toilet in the background.)

Swami: Who dare?

SP: *Two BIG guys in black suits are standing there* Are you the one who calls himself Swami on the shroomery?

Swami: Who wants to know? Are the you the M.I.B.?

SP: *Ignoring question* We received an anonymous tip.

Swami: Yeah, and...

SP: Can you levitate for us or walk on hot coals or manifest flowers from your hands?

Swami: Um, probably not.

SP: Are you one with the Universe, can you meditate for 12 hours without moving?

Swami: I did once watch A Star Trek Marathon for 8 hours without getting up from the couch.

SP: We are afraid that you will have to give us you Bhagavad Gita, your incense, your Tibetan bells AND your ocre robe.

Swami: Don't be afraid.

SP: What?!

Swami: Nevermind. My robe is out being cleaned and pressed, you will have to come back on Monday.

SP: *Glowering* We need it now!

Swami: Cool your jets bros. Need is an ego thang.

SP: *They whip off sunglasses and step forward menacingly*

Swami: OK already - here is your damn robe, but I want a receipt. This ain't over. *Mumbling* Orange ain't my color anyway. *Slams door*


--------------------



The proof is in the pudding.

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: Swami]
    #1818595 -

:alert: :devil: :alert:

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: Swami]
    #1818598 -

HA!! I'M SPORTIN YOUR ROBE AS WE SPEAK! MwuHahAHaHa!!


--------------------
AH HA....

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: Swami]
    #1818640 -

YOU TOO?!

Those fuckers took my yoga-mat as well as my herb garden!!

Dude you're not getting that robe back.... those guys visited me a year and a half ago and they said they'd bring the shit right back, but I haven't seen any of it; I have, however, seen one of the agents stumbling around as if he'd ingested numerous goodies from my garden..

Looks like its time to get yourself a new robe, my man - and damn I thought that orange looked fantastic on you; wasn't that the ONLY orange one they made, too?! RATS!


--------------------
Insert an "I think" mentally in front of eveything I say that seems sketchy, because I certainly don't KNOW much. Also; feel free to yell at me.
In addition: SHPONGLE

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: Strumpling]
    #1819028 -

Thank god they're not interested in the sleaze... I'd be cleaned out!


--------------------
Note: In desperate need of a cure...

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: Sclorch]
    #1819109 -

oh but they ARE, dear Sclorch....

I didn't mention the "shipment" of sleaze they "Held for further investigation."

They didn't return any of THAT shit either, so I now believe that "Held for further investigation" in MY case meant "Held for permanant whack-off material for Mr. Bush N Friends."

Those fuckin scumbags....


--------------------
Insert an "I think" mentally in front of eveything I say that seems sketchy, because I certainly don't KNOW much. Also; feel free to yell at me.
In addition: SHPONGLE

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: Strumpling]
    #1819289 -

Yeah, well, I was up late last night, posting on the Shroomery. I heard a knock on my window, and I thought to myself "Damn, that's strange, since I'm on the second story..". I feared that it might be aliens, but since I am looking for Truth, I decided to lay my fears beside me (I took them off and set them on the floor). I went over to the window and opened the curtain. A man with black sunglasses, shortly cut hair, and a black suit was sitting there (yes, sitting). Nothing appeared to hold him up, and he calmy stated "Open the window, I need to speak with you":

Well, I didn't think I had anything to lose, so I opened the window. He floated in, still sitting down, and then jumped to the floor. I took off my watch and threw it to where he had been sitting in the air, and it quickly disappeared.

The man stepped forward and smacked me. "How dare you tempt with the ripple in reality!" I had already laid my fears down on the floor, so I wasn't nerved. "Well," I replied, "why do you get to tempt the ripple in reality?!"

The man looked around, and spoke again. "That is not of your concern. It seems you have been looking for things that should not be found, tampering with things that should not be tampered with. I have been sent to stop this." He then pushed me onto the floor and kicked me in the head. I barely was conscious, and the last thing I saw before I lost my grip on consciousness was him walking up to my shelf and grabbing my Enlightometer...

I am now lost without it. I can buy a new one, and even get 50 more points towards the Ram Dass picture, but how can I ever recover the information stored in there? I mean, I had the fucking solution to Pi and everything.... I mean, who are you suspossed to call about this, anyways?
Peace.


--------------------
:redpanda:
If I should die this very moment
I wouldn't fear
For I've never known completeness
Like being here
Wrapped in the warmth of you
Loving every breath of you
:heartpump: :bunnyhug: :yinyang:

:yinyang: :levitate: :earth: :levitate: :yinyang:

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: fireworks_god]
    #5919463 -

*bump*

:evil:

:earth: :sun: :headbang: :satansmoking:
Peace. :mushroom2:


--------------------
:redpanda:
If I should die this very moment
I wouldn't fear
For I've never known completeness
Like being here
Wrapped in the warmth of you
Loving every breath of you
:heartpump: :bunnyhug: :yinyang:

:yinyang: :levitate: :earth: :levitate: :yinyang:

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: fireworks_god]
    #5919725 -

I miss Swami.  :sad:

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: Veritas]
    #5919732 -

How much does membership to the Swami Uber Alles Bund cost annually?

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: MushmanTheManic]
    #5919747 -

If you have to ask, you can't afford it.  :wink:

There are arrangements to have your dues waived, however...

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: Swami]
    #5919907 -

Fantastic!

How did I ever come to doubt the Swamster?


--------------------


:poison: Dark Triangles - New Psychedelic Techno Single - Listen on Soundcloud :poison:
Gyroscope full album available SoundCloud or MySpace

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: Ped]
    #5920486 -

who was this swami guy exactly?

some of his post here are just legendary, where he at now?


--------------------
hello, your name is life on earth
------------------------------------

"I traveled a long way seeking God, but when I finally gave up and turned back, there He was, within me! O Lalli! Now why do you wander like a beggar? Make some effort, and He will grant you a vision of Himself in the form of bliss in your heart." -the saint of the Kashmir Shaivism tradition: Lalli.

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: JCoke]
    #5920492 -

JCoke said:
some of his post here are just legendary, where he at now?


I believe he got the banstick.


--------------------

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: Silversoul]
    #5920878 -

I just cant believe they ban people like me and Swami


*shakes head*

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: Jalruza]
    #5921079 -

poker champion of internet


--------------------
:brainfart: _ :finger:

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: redgreenvines]
    #5921229 -

swamisez2


--------------------
Anxiety is what you make it.

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: LunarEclipse]
    #5922152 -

ha, swami's not around anymore.


--------------------
You can check the last post in my journal for contact info.

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: Swami]
    #5922524 -

RIP


--------------------
"A warrior is a hunter. He calculates everything. That's control. Once his calculations are over, he acts. He lets go. That's abandon. A warrior is not a leaf at the mercy of the wind. No one can push him; no one can make him do things against himself or against his better judgment. A warrior is tuned to survive, and he survives in the best of all possible fashions." ― Carlos Castaneda

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: Huehuecoyotl]
    #5922597 -

RIPOFF


--------------------
"Don't believe everything you think". -Anom.

" All that lives was born to die"-Anom.

With much wisdom comes much sorrow,
The more knowledge, the more grief.
Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: Icelander]
    #5922603 -

? I meant rest in peace which I know Swami will never do...


--------------------
"A warrior is a hunter. He calculates everything. That's control. Once his calculations are over, he acts. He lets go. That's abandon. A warrior is not a leaf at the mercy of the wind. No one can push him; no one can make him do things against himself or against his better judgment. A warrior is tuned to survive, and he survives in the best of all possible fashions." ― Carlos Castaneda

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: Huehuecoyotl]
    #5922881 -

Are you saying you know the famous Swami?


--------------------
"Don't believe everything you think". -Anom.

" All that lives was born to die"-Anom.

With much wisdom comes much sorrow,
The more knowledge, the more grief.
Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: Icelander]
    #5922890 -

No, I do not really know anybody...


--------------------
"A warrior is a hunter. He calculates everything. That's control. Once his calculations are over, he acts. He lets go. That's abandon. A warrior is not a leaf at the mercy of the wind. No one can push him; no one can make him do things against himself or against his better judgment. A warrior is tuned to survive, and he survives in the best of all possible fashions." ― Carlos Castaneda

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: Huehuecoyotl]
    #5922892 -

I hope he RsIP.


--------------------
"Don't believe everything you think". -Anom.

" All that lives was born to die"-Anom.

With much wisdom comes much sorrow,
The more knowledge, the more grief.
Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: Icelander]
    #5923277 -

Ya'll were suspossed to read and comment on my elaborate story that I included in this post... :mad:

:earth: :sun: :headbang: :satansmoking:
Peace. :mushroom2:


--------------------
:redpanda:
If I should die this very moment
I wouldn't fear
For I've never known completeness
Like being here
Wrapped in the warmth of you
Loving every breath of you
:heartpump: :bunnyhug: :yinyang:

:yinyang: :levitate: :earth: :levitate: :yinyang:

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: truekimbo2]
    #5924781 -

Swami got permabanned from the Shroomery so you won't see him around anymore as Swami. He's got operatives everywhere though including here so be careful what you say. He could make you disappear or at least give you a tummy ache.


--------------------
Anxiety is what you make it.

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: fireworks_god]
    #5925049 -

I got banned because of Swami and all I got was this lousy "I'm with stupid" t-shirt. :wink:

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Re: Swami visited by the Spiritual Police [Re: Redstorm]
    #5925867 -

Swami gets banned and RESTLESS is still here. Makes sense . . .

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Swami's parole was revoked by the Shroomery Warden.... [Re: fireworks_god]
    #5929424 -

I saw this thread, and was like "KICK ASS, Swami is BACK....!!!!"
:woot:

Then, the grasp of reality set in as I investigated................
>pout pout<


>^;;^<


--------------------
I'll be your midnight French Fry....  :naughty:

"The most important things in life that are often ignored, are the things that one cannot see...."
>^;;^<

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Re: Swami's parole was revoked by the Shroomery Warden.... [Re: PhanTomCat]
    #5929428 -

You deluded yourself and then emotionally reacted when you were disillusioned. If Swami were here, you would probably react agansit him with attacks, the same behavior that got him permabanned.

:smirk:

:earth: :sun: :headbang: :satansmoking:
Peace. :mushroom2:


--------------------
:redpanda:
If I should die this very moment
I wouldn't fear
For I've never known completeness
Like being here
Wrapped in the warmth of you
Loving every breath of you
:heartpump: :bunnyhug: :yinyang:

:yinyang: :levitate: :earth: :levitate: :yinyang:

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Re: Swami's parole was revoked by the Shroomery Warden.... [Re: fireworks_god]
    #5929460 -

fireworks_god said:
If Swami were here, you would probably react agansit him with attacks, the same behavior that got him permabanned.


Attack....?    HHhhmmmmm.....   

Well, I have never contacted a moderator about ANY posters on this site, nor flagged a thread, nor anything else like that....
I don't like politics in the least bit, reporting someone for what their words/ideas is really a whiney :bitch: type thing to do....  (in my humble opinion)
Either way, I don't **think** that I have ever attacked anyone on this site....  :shrug:

Why, you wanna~ fight....????    What the hell are you lookin at....!???  :lol:


Now, if Swami came back as a mouse, I just might have to pounce on him....    :wink:    :tongue:


>^;;^<


--------------------
I'll be your midnight French Fry....  :naughty:

"The most important things in life that are often ignored, are the things that one cannot see...."
>^;;^<

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Re: Swami's parole was revoked by the Shroomery Warden.... [Re: PhanTomCat]
    #5929478 -

I never expressed or implied that you did. It was simply a joke based in my perceptions of what happened. :wink:

I wasn't actually saying that you were responsible for his ban. :lol:

:earth: :sun: :headbang: :satansmoking:
Peace. :mushroom2:


--------------------
:redpanda:
If I should die this very moment
I wouldn't fear
For I've never known completeness
Like being here
Wrapped in the warmth of you
Loving every breath of you
:heartpump: :bunnyhug: :yinyang:

:yinyang: :levitate: :earth: :levitate: :yinyang:

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Re: Swami's parole was revoked by the Shroomery Warden.... [Re: fireworks_god]
    #5929518 -

I do miss Swami's colorful personality on this forum, and would prolly~ come here more often if he posted....
I just come here for fun, nothing "serious"....  :grin:

:poke:  :lol:



>^;;^<


--------------------
I'll be your midnight French Fry....  :naughty:

"The most important things in life that are often ignored, are the things that one cannot see...."
>^;;^<

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Shop: Myyco.com Golden Teacher Liquid Culture For Sale   Unfolding Nature Unfolding Nature: Being in the Implicate Order

General Interest > Philosophy, Sociology & Psychology
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