stubb said:

Ya man, my eldest brother passed a while ago. And while I loved and respected him, I can't even image what my parents went through.

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thumbsy said:

I didn't feel like waiting for the agar to cool to 140 so I poured plates with it probably around 180 degrees. My fingertips will atone me for this sin. Forgive me o fingertips.

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BeefExtreme said:

Like ldk said.  What you do with your pain is ultimately up to you. In my experience there are two byproducts of trauma: bitterness or compassion. 

Committing yourself to helping other people is actually a life hack

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BeefExtreme said:

Sorry to hear that brother. My dad is in advanced stages of prostate cancer presently I will see him tomorrow for a surgery.  Life gets really real after 40

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Love ya dude, I'll keep your pops in my thoughts

BeefExtreme said:

Sorry to hear that brother. My dad is in advanced stages of prostate cancer presently I will see him tomorrow for a surgery.  Life gets really real after 40

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BeefExtreme said:

Sorry to hear that brother. My dad is in advanced stages of prostate cancer presently I will see him tomorrow for a surgery.  Life gets really real after 40

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blakeyface said:

Though I've been on Shroomery for a couple of years, I post infrequently but lurk a lot. Not great at interactions, I am socially impaired...ptsd resulting from some 18 years in federal prison '93 to 2011.  The sentence was a result of a non violent drug offense...manufacture. Initially I was offered a 10 year sentence if I would cooperate, debrief on everyone I had ever worked with, some being very close friends. I was also told that if I left anyone out in my debriefing and it later came to light, that would queer the deal and I would be resentenced to a full 20. If I refused to debrief, I would get the full 20 anyway.  Know that I couldn't roll over nor could I do that much time, I determined to take the 20 and off myself soon after I arrived in prison. I figured that taking myself off would be a simple transaction, an easy exit. It was not. The most harrowing point of my sentence was the 9 year mark. After enduring 9 years of overwhelming shit...riot and lockdowns, watching murders on the weight pile and in the units, dealing with scores of sadistic prison guards (not all prison guards were sadists but prison has quite a few), and enduring more than a few cretinous sociopathic convicts, you realize that you are only at the halfway mark and that you're going to have to repeat that 9 year stretch and all that it entailed yet again.  That's when a sort of emotional rigor mortis sets in.
I have been out since 2011, though I still return to prison 3 or 4 nights a week with some recurring nighmare sweatfests,
I have been using mushrooms for the past few years to decompress, though I can't take too large a dose or the panic locked inside starts to surface. Franz Kafka says that we should only read the kinds of books that act like an axe to the frozen sea inside us. I suppose that psilocybin is currently doing that for me. Reading posts from an ex prison guard unleashed this diatribe. Make of it what you will.

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BeefExtreme said:

That has got to be one of the most powerful posts I've ever read in this thread.  Thanks for sharing that.  I think I needed to hear it. For sure I lost a couple years of my life but nothing compared to what this must have been. I absolutely can't imagine. Thanks for being with us. I hope to hear from you more. Please let us know if there's anything we can do

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I 10,000% agree with beef on this. I was floored while at work i had to sit back and think for a while. pure impact.


Sending all the positive vibes I can to each and every one of you <3

Belintaf said:

For example, the productivity of a genetic line can be stabilized through continuous cycles of selection and recombination. So isn't replicating the same colony until senescence a bit of a waste of time?

I ask and share this from a place of genuine uncertainty.

Hugs

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BeefExtreme said:

Like ldk said.  What you do with your pain is ultimately up to you. In my experience there are two byproducts of trauma: bitterness or compassion. 

I think one of the biggest game changing realizations for me was that it isn't all about me.  Poor me in my trauma. That that's vanity.

Committing yourself to helping other people is actually a life hack

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DV8DUG said:

Belintaf said:

For example, the productivity of a genetic line can be stabilized through continuous cycles of selection and recombination. So isn't replicating the same colony until senescence a bit of a waste of time?

I ask and share this from a place of genuine uncertainty.

Hugs

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When you selectively breed traits or phenos, you don't breed towards senescence. Since you are continually going back to spore this isn't a thing.

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bloodssonnew said:

BeefExtreme said:

Like ldk said.  What you do with your pain is ultimately up to you. In my experience there are two byproducts of trauma: bitterness or compassion. 

I think one of the biggest game changing realizations for me was that it isn't all about me.  Poor me in my trauma. That that's vanity.

Committing yourself to helping other people is actually a life hack

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For me there's eather grief or coldness and bloodlust from trauma dep

DV8DUG said:

Belintaf said:

For example, the productivity of a genetic line can be stabilized through continuous cycles of selection and recombination. So isn't replicating the same colony until senescence a bit of a waste of time?

I ask and share this from a place of genuine uncertainty.

Hugs

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When you selectively breed traits or phenos, you don't breed towards senescence. Since you are continually going back to spore this isn't a thing.

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Hey friend 👋

Isn't senescence also not a problem growing a clone from agar to whatever taking a clone to agar rinse repeat? Or will that also result in senesence?

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bloodssonnew said:

I confess I'm ordering this now.

And il get my ffu withen a month if I can find someplace willing to sell one reasonable price to alaska



Things are finally looking up eh

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