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Re: validating beliefs through action [Re: DoctorJ]
    #5698510 -

one more thing:

I always leave half my meal on the table

I do not desire to be completely filled,

for there is value in possesing some emptiness.

room to grow!

always room for improvement!

ever-expanding, ever lasting!

you ever seen 'The Goonies"?

Leave some for one-eyed willie!

you know me, always the workaholic.

work is my vacation, vacation is my work

zen is a difficult art to understand

sorry.

"What else should I be? All Apologies."

OK, I'll shut up now.

Edited by DoctorJ (06/01/06 05:17 AM)

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Re: validating beliefs through action [Re: DoctorJ]
    #5698534 -

OK, to make a liar out of myself:

you have little respect for Justice

you have little respect for vengeance

but I wonder,

how many truly evil people have you encountered?

How many bitter injustices have you suffered?

If I hadn't suffered so much dishonesty, treachery, theivery, and violence,

then I would see no need for justice

but unfortunately, I have seen all of these things

so I do see a need for Justice

*sigh*

the Illuminati upbringing was not an easy one.

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Re: validating beliefs through action [Re: DoctorJ]
    #5699582 -

Quote:
oh yes, and the torus is a beautiful shape,

but there are many others

do you not appreciate variety?

"the spice extends life. The spice expands consciousness. The spice is vital to space travel. Traveling, without moving!"

what is a universe without disorder and chaos?

a pretty boring place if you ask me.



Does that mean you are a taurus? Gemini is the sign of the twins and most are like 12 different people in one. That's why my daughter thought you might be.

I love diversity, growth and change and I rarely feel bored with life.( To the contrary, so much to see and do. Curiosities abound around me to be explored understood and discovered.

Quote:
All those hydrogen and helium atoms, lined up in neat little rows and columns. seems like such a waste to me. Turning what could be a work of art into a spreadsheet.



What gave you that idea of how I feel about things across the board, up, down, out, around, in, over and under? I like inanimate objects in order and animate objects enjoying the dance to the beats of their own drummers. I enjoy harmonic blends like a bass beat that stays consistent and a horn and bongo that is going all over the place at the same time.



Quote:
Though you are a great King,

even the lowliest anarchist could teach you a lesson


I'm a servant and always learning from everything. Even with the darkness you love and appreciate. I can learn from that. What I learn from it is where I don't want to be, how not to get into it and how to get out of it.

Haven't you also noticed that I have made you a curious subject to study? Do you pay attention, notice or listen to anything but yourself? How often do you ever clear "empty" and  quiet your frenetic chaotic mind and just observe and listen? I hope you get your home and take up gardening some day. Gardening is a great teacher too.
 

Quote:
you have little respect for Justice

you have little respect for vengeance


I understand peoples needs to wan to justify imbalances in the external world. I understand peoples need to seek vengeance and justification.

I also understand that two wrongs do not make a right. It just puts two people in the shitz instead of one. The ideal for me is to help pull everyone out of the shitz of life, including myself.

I look at someone like a Jeffrey Dahmer and want to know, what caused his pain for him to have it to such a depth and wealth of it,  to want to inflict on others in such a way, for some temporary relief from it. I learned about his childhood. I wonder where was his justification for being brought into a world so unloved and unnurtured. Suffering is suffering and I would like to see it end for human kind. I don't want to be the cause of any more if I can help it.

Anyway, reconciliation, justification, rebalancing, and restoring peace and harmony is becoming more of INTERNAL event for me.

If someone slaps me and I slap them back, I will not feel good about myself for doing that. If someone slaps me, and I find a way to understand, forgive, and look at where I fell off kilter to not even see it coming, and rebalance myself out to draw more gentility and kindness to myself , I will feel better about things.

If we never work, to rise above things and be the bigger heart and mind in the matters of life, we doom ourselves to small prisons built in the muck.

Mud wrestling makes no sense to me, nor does self imprisonment.

I prefer to justify, reconcile and restore balance and harmony from within, when life wrongs me. When I am reconciled and balanced, wrongs don't exists.

I use to be a vengeful type in my younger years. There was this girl I worked with who keyed my beautiful new alpha romeo. Wrote Fuck You on the trunk. After I got it repainted, she keyed a scratch in it again. I ratted her out to police that she was working in a bar underage and she got fired. It was getting freaking expensive to keep having my car redone.

HOWEVER, I was my big judgmental careless mouth at the time brought her actions to me. I made an ignorant crack about adopted kids getting screwed by their own flesh and blood, never knowing, she gave a child up for adoption in her teens.

My words must have cut her deep. Its a no wonder she took a sharp instrument to my car. Then I got her fired to boot. Dad had to leave the state, a great life and move back in with her dad.

Did she deserve my comment or my retaliation? I don't think so now.

Did I deserve to have my car keyed twice for saying something like that. No, she could've equally written me off as an ignorant ass and found a way to forgive me.

The moral of this story and life is, Someone has to be the first to lay their weapons down or we will never know peace. Now, in life I want it start with me and rise to the occasion best I can and continue getting better at it.

I would've handled that situation so much differently today. I would've apologized to her and let it go.  I work to watch my words and actions better too.

Quote:
how many truly evil people have you encountered?



Come off that one like no one here but you understands or has seen what you have seen doc.  You insult everyone here when you act like the only person who has faced the abyss.

I got news for you, when I read that someone could easily pop a cap in another's ass, and take a human life out of vengeance, I am encountering evil energy.

Evil to me is whatever runs in opposition to life evil is live spelled backwards.

Quote:
How many bitter injustices have you suffered?


Where do I freaking begin? I won't help myself or anyone else by holding unto to childish resentment for any of it. What did I do to deserve getting beat bloody with a belt for giggling when I was suppose to be falling asleep? We use to plot ways to kill our dad in his sleep when we were kids. Fortunately we never acted on it and grew the fuck up.

When we stopped being so self absorbed, we came to learn, his dad did the same to him, and his his. We all came to understand, forgive and break the chain of inflicting violence, terror and suffering on to our own. Now we know, he probably want to kill his own dad too, and instead, took that anger out on us. Now we understand, his abusive of us, was an immature way for him to justify what happened to him as a child. It's how he made it right in his own mind that is still stuck there.

Justification for us kids was to heal ourselves and stop it from going any further. Never having raised a hand or voice to our own kids is how we justified things and made them right again.


Quote:
If I hadn't suffered so much dishonesty, treachery, thievery, and violence,

then I would see no need for justice


Grow up doc. Justify things by being the change you wish to see. That is the best vengeance. They win when you just perpetuate the hate and violence and you loose.


Quote:
but unfortunately, I have seen all of these things


ALL of us here have. Last time I checked, we were all typing from planet earth.


Quote:
so I do see a need for Justice


*sigh*

I see someone who is in need of some healing and mending up all of the inner shreds and conflict doc.

Quote:
the Illuminati upbringing was not an easy one.

I know what happens to many of the kids doc. Not sure to what extent you were messed with but I know they like to trauma shock kids into split mindedness and submission for easy mind control.

To begin healing, you need to start talking about it and let people know. If you don't it will eat you up alive. 

That is your sweet vengeance. OUT THEM. Pull them out form the dark and make them stand naked in the light of day. Restore justice by not repeating their ways. Grow up and out of it. For every person who stops sending them hate and fear and anger energy, their power weakens.

If you quit feeding the phantoms and their shadows sides, they will wither away.

They don't have spit for their own power source because they all cut themselves off from the love of source. They use ours against us to keep us down. Quit giving your power away to them through hate and anger and respect. There is this twisted side of you that seems to admire their cunning, which is rather unimpressive compared to what you forgot about yourself. 

I am going to send the rest of what I have to say to you on this to your PM box.


:peace: :heart:


--------------------
Ahuwale ka nane huna.

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Re: validating beliefs through action [Re: gettinjiggywithit]
    #5700223 -

I understand what you're saying, here. 

I have been the change I want to see.  Guess what?  No one cares. 

I get hated on daily for practicing my (completely non-violent) beliefs. 

If someone keying your car is what you call evil, then I ain't impressed. 

The love of my life basically destroyed herself in some twisted attempt to fuck with my head.  She went around sleeping with most of my friends and family just to torture me, laughing about it the whole time.  This is a girl I would have married, and still would take bullets for.  I really love her that much.  But now she's disfigured and has STDs and shit, completely twisted wreck of a person.  So sad :nonono:

My family is into some crooked, twisted shit involving ungodly amounts of money and power.  we're talkin big oil and insurance companies and the GOP.  Skull and Bones shit.  Me, I'm the odd man out.  the spiritual one in the family, you might say :wink:

I was in line to inherit shitloads of cash that was misappropriated by the Feds instead.  Oh well, at least they owe me a few favors now.  A few million favors, actually.  I literally have a liscense to kill, and I haven't hurt a fucking fly.  Power doesn't usually corrupt me, but its a serious test of will not to enact Justice on the people who have ruined what could have been a fairly pleasant life. 

Luckily, I'm starting to get out of the woods on this shit, starting to feel good abut myself again.  It was a difficult recovery, but opiates and rum helped a lot :wink:

Anyway, I'm going to a Nine Inch Nails concert this weekend (my favorite band!), so maybe I'll get lucky and meet the girl of my dreams there.  :lol:  Probably not, but at least I can hope :smile:

Thanks for your words of inspiration :thumbup:

PS:  I don't think its wrong to kill someone in defense of one's own life.  If people don't want to be killed, they shouldn't try to kill me, is all I'm sayin.  I'm not going to go out and get vigilante justice over something stupid like a stolen car stereo or something.

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Re: validating beliefs through action [Re: DoctorJ]
    #5700736 -

Quote:
I have been the change I want to see.  Guess what?  No one cares. 

I get hated on daily for practicing my (completely non-violent) beliefs. 



You've been shown a lot of love and support here for your non violent, words of wisdom and insights. Ignore the bad stuff people throw at you and pay attention to hte good stuff. It's out there. It may seem more worthy to you to pay attention to when you value the love and light more then the fear and dark.

Besides, being the change you wish to see is not about doing it to impress others or to get their attention. Being the change you wish to see is about putting you in the life you wish to be living in.

If other people want to walk around hating, even hating on you, so what. If you walk around loving, you are in the energy of love and you're there. Others who are there, will connect with you if you can consistently hold it. When you start with the , I can fill you with darkness, put a gun to your balls, blah blah stuff, you'll push them away. Only a sicko psycho chick, drawn to power players would want to cozy up to that aspect, which, I find hard to beleive is the real you anyway. It's just a costume you can ditch. Its a no wonder all you have known are mentally il, women who use and abuse men.

That bad ass guy talk will draw that type.

Quote:
If someone keying your car is what you call evil, then I ain't impressed.

 

That story wasn't about facing evil. That one was about the absolute stupidity of vengeance. That was 17 years ago. Like I said, now, I would of apologized for my insensitive remark and let the car keying go. Getting her fired didn't resolve anything and just made things worse for her, when I started it with my loose comment.

Just saying that there was a time, I did believe it was the thing to do. It made me feel empowered. :tongue: Now, I just see how "weak" is was of me to not be able to see myself as the cause, understand her reaction and just forgive it and let go of it.

Now, I have found that the most powerful place to be is in forgiveness, in love and in humble being.

You're story is a rough one. When family doesn;t have your back, it sucks. Thats when its time, to go out and find your spiritual family. I'm glad to hear you are pulling yourself out of the woods, and time and new activities, people and environments will help to heal. Hindsight alone usually gives a fresh perspective on things making them easier to understand and manage later on up the road.

Open up to the new and fulfill yourself with newer brighter cleaner energy.

Your life can still be pleasant. Wealth, and partners with messed up heads ruin it for many. There is no guarantee things would've turned up Roses, with the girl or the money. For all you know, either may have destroyed you. Today is a new day with a fresh clean break to begin anew and make each moment as pleasant as you can for yourself.

It doesn't take much, a warm smile, a pause to watch the squirrels at play, a nice song. Moment by moment, take it and make it and give it to yourself and others.

Quote:
Thanks for your words of inspiration :thumbup:


You're welcome.

Quote:
PS:  I don't think its wrong to kill someone in defense of one's own life.  If people don't want to be killed, they shouldn't try to kill me, is all I'm sayin.  I'm not going to go out and get vigilante justice over something stupid like a stolen car stereo or something.



I could see myself killing in self defence as a LAST resort. If you keep your spidey senses sharp, you will be able to evade danger long before it meets you or can catch you snoozing. Consider, how you said, you like living center stage. Drawing attention to yourself when you think people are out to get you probably isn't key. Learn to adopt a low profile mode and you will notice, people will leave you be.

Sounds to me like you need to move out of the area you are in. I caught up into a lot of materialistic superficial Bullshit when I lived in the Chicago burns. Though I started realizing how fucked up it was, it was hard to change because people wanted to hold you to the old you they knew.

Getting out was the best move I ever made.

Hit the islands to find your non materialistic down to earth girl and a more pleasant pace in life. My time In St. Thomas U.S.V.I. and Kauai Hi., was just what my doctor ordered for me. It all turned around from there.

There are  a lot of good people out there doc. Move to a new vibe and give people a chance. Be careful not to push them away with the tough talk. maybe you needed that to survive in your current environment. Change your environment and start fresh.

You have a lot of Charisma and a beautiful heart mind and soul when it comes through. Let people see more of that part of you and they'll start showing you more of that part of them. The world is one giant mirror after all.

No need for anyone to let there yesterdays ruin their tomorrows. Let them go. Its baggage you don;t need to be carrying around. It sounds like its just weighing heavy on you. That's why you are tired and want to leave this place. Lighten your load and let it all go into forgiveness of what just is and was.

A cool and effective exercise for healing the past that effects us in the now is to go into visualization mode and replay the worst of it that still weighs heavy on you to have worked out with the ends all healed up and mended in good will and peace for all. It's amazing how things immediately begin to change and take new shape after you do that.

The subconscious memory doesn't know the difference between the real and imagined. If you reprogram it with really good stuff, when on auto pilot, it will run nicer program patterns for you to experience.  :sun:

You did nothing you need to be punishing yourself for. All has been forgiven of us.  :heart: Screw your dads inheritance. You have a Divine inheritance to accept and spend for all the days of your existence and no one can ever take that away from you. Draw from Source.

:peace: :heart:


--------------------
Ahuwale ka nane huna.

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Re: validating beliefs through action [Re: gettinjiggywithit]
    #5700829 -

something else i'm noticing you've seem to be forgetting DR. J.

there is ONE God.

the devil that stalks you, the evil that torments you
it's a sort of test

focusing in on how satan destroys love isn't the way to fight against him.
hold fast to that which is good.

you say people hate you and nobody cares.
but i care.
right now i'm seeing you as the one who doesn't care.
not enough to answer my pm's anyways, lol

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Re: validating beliefs through action [Re: gettinjiggywithit]
    #5701023 -

good advice, from both of you. 


nothing I didn't already know, but a good reminder

You guys and I are on the same page, and its nice to know there are people out there who think like me.  It gives me hope for this planet after all. 


And let me just tell you this:  My true inheritance cannot be taken away, for it is immaterial.  Lets see them try to steal a ghost :wink:

:rofl:

oh man, this has really cheered me up.  You guys rock

PS:  Yes, I have used the technique of replaying horrible painful memories in my mind to accept them; this works particularly well with opiates, though I'm sure when I get stronger I won't need the drugs.

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Re: validating beliefs through action [Re: DoctorJ]
    #5701364 -

:smile: You put a big smile on my face! :heart:

Of course you know that stuff. When we get a little down in the dumps and the vibe drops, its easy to start forgetting again. Thankfully, there are always those who come along to remind us again. I love it when people put up reminder posts.

The technique I mentioned is a little different from just replaying events to come to terms with it, though it helps to even do just that. What you do is "rewrite it" where everyone acts in good will and all leaves off well. THAT is what changes the form structures your auto pilot programming is running on.  It also seems to shift the timeline you resonate with to one where that "visualized probability" actually happened and then you take off from there with a more sound foundation behind you in your soul matrix memory banks.

What is that book you reccomended about? I havn't read it. I was about to look up books on Akido philosophies to order.(reminder refreshers :wink: )Maybe I will check that one out too.


:peace: :heart:


--------------------
Ahuwale ka nane huna.

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Re: validating beliefs through action [Re: gettinjiggywithit]
    #5701376 -

Well, I don't truly get control of Time for a few more years :wink:

and 'How to Be Perfect in 3 Days' is a children's book.  Good message, though.  You should read it.

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Re: validating beliefs through action [Re: DoctorJ]
    #5702188 -

Three days? :jawdrop:

How do they even define, "perfect"? Thats a relative thing. What would the perfect human be like and would it be perfect to everyones standards.

Ever know how what is "perfect" to you keeps changing over time. Or, how when you get something just right, soon, you get new ideas for improving it.:lol: There's no end to the creative arts of tweaking is there?

You don't have to be able to control time itself to be able to shift probability flows for yourself or start new offshoots.

So many ways to do it.

Haven't you ever had that feeling where, this has happened and I know where this is going? Better yet, like in the matrix, when trinity told Neo not to go down the alley because he got killed in that time line, so he made a new choice which took him into a new probability.

Tweaking!!!!!!!!

You can do it when you get that feeling of, "Hold up. I know or can see where this is going." That's your intuitive guide telling you not to take that route, been there done that, no need to repeat it. Those are the moments we get to make a wiser choice. In the process we can tweak out for ourselves even higher ideals to experience.

The thing is with the "been there done that repeats", the people and the scenes may be different, so people think they are doing something new, but the pattern of how things go down is the same. Thats what one wants to watch for and nip in the bud if the pattern sucks or is getting tiring.

It's more about changing the patterns the fabric of reality will cut out for you to wear(live in) until you choose a new pattern and things change up a lot again.

Its wild when you really get it rolling. Life starts to feel like you are living many life times in one and everything speeds up perceptually yet things get easier with each new choice that shifts you up a vibratory notch.

It becomes an intuitive challenge that gets fun to never repeat the same pattern that leads to something undesirable or medicocre twice, let alone tens or hundreds of times like you see people in habitual, predictable patterns do, that keep crying the same whoa is me tune. Things just keep getting lighter and lighter.

If you feel like things start to get heavier and heavier, that's a sign you are falling back into old patterns. I watch for that too.

It takes discipline and courage though to break from making the same old choices in old patterns. I pulled off a biggy last week. Almost went to make the same "want more now pay in hidden ways later" mistake with a MAJOR purchase. A broker stalled on a get back call, and during that time, I was getting that "feeling". I started seeing potential "hardship" I could've easily fallen back into that I recently just got out of. I made a new choice to put it off until a better time, and now feel great about making that change and things up ahead look even sweeter then they did had I gone for it when I thought it was a good idea.

One thing I noticed that helps is to give your guide regular direction on where you want to go and be. It'll take you anywhere, as it has the birds eye view on what potentials lie up ahead. If you let it know, not specifics, but generals of the place you want to be in.

Just sharing things I am discovering to work. maybe anyone reading can play around with it and get it to work for them and they'll be loving life like never before.

I like how SEAL coined time as just being the space between things.

Thats a fun one to play with.:yesnod:

:peace: :heart:


--------------------
Ahuwale ka nane huna.

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Re: validating beliefs through action [Re: gettinjiggywithit]
    #5702230 -

read the book

kthnxbye

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