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OfflineAnneBonney
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Registered: 07/01/05
Posts: 3
Last seen: 11 years, 4 months
killed the obeserver...
    #4360420 - 07/01/05 06:24 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

hey there...just wanted to know if anyone can relate to this or has an idea what it means:

all my life there was some part of me that, no matter what i did, how i felt or how pissed i was just sat in some corner of my mind analysing and observing stuff - like even when i was drunk as f****, which has ocurred on rare occasions, this part of me was absolutely clear and untouched by the circumstances.

now what happened is that since i had what i think must have been a level 4 trip some months ago (OBE and several minutes of nonexistence:-), this thing is gone. it is as if for the first time i am actually one with myself, "really being there". part of this is scary, because there is no neutral "oh how interesting, so i am dying" anymore, but still i feel it?s a good thing...am just wondering what it actually was, some part of the ego, or what?

any suggestions? (and sorry if it sounds weird, but...yaknow;-)


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People...they're just the world making funny faces at you...


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Invisibleredgreenvines
irregular verb
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Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 19,702
Re: killed the obeserver... [Re: AnneBonney]
    #4360722 - 07/01/05 07:56 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

you have merged your parents and ancestors into yourself


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OfflineAnneBonney
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Registered: 07/01/05
Posts: 3
Last seen: 11 years, 4 months
Re: killed the obeserver... [Re: redgreenvines]
    #4360830 - 07/01/05 08:25 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

....oh, no please, that?s disgusting...:-)))

but makes sense somehow...


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People...they're just the world making funny faces at you...


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OfflineOldWoodSpecter
waiting
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Registered: 02/01/05
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Re: killed the obeserver... [Re: AnneBonney]
    #4360874 - 07/01/05 08:40 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

God I feel sorry for you, you are comming to shroomery S&P, and whatever you say, you are going to be attacked by emotionally charged people who believe in the oposite.
But you have my most honest wellcome  :thumbup: :heart:


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I descend upon your earth from the skies
I command your very souls you unbelievers
Bring before me what is mine


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InvisibleIcelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery
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Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 93,974
Loc: underbelly
Re: killed the obeserver... [Re: OldWoodSpecter]
    #4360883 - 07/01/05 08:42 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

:rotfl:


--------------------
"Don't believe everything you think". -Anom.

" All that lives was born to die"-Anom.

With much wisdom comes much sorrow,
The more knowledge, the more grief.
Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC


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Offlinefresh313
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Re: killed the obeserver... [Re: AnneBonney]
    #4360906 - 07/01/05 08:49 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

i dont know what happened to Sinbad's post, he directed to search for 'Dzogchen' , i found this http://www.nyingma.com/dzogchen1.htm


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InvisibleIcelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery
Male

Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 93,974
Loc: underbelly
Re: killed the obeserver... [Re: fresh313]
    #4360915 - 07/01/05 08:53 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

Hey I haven't read all of this but it looks really good! :thumbup:


--------------------
"Don't believe everything you think". -Anom.

" All that lives was born to die"-Anom.

With much wisdom comes much sorrow,
The more knowledge, the more grief.
Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC


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Invisibleredgreenvines
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Re: killed the obeserver... [Re: Icelander]
    #4362365 - 07/02/05 06:19 AM (11 years, 5 months ago)



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OfflineKalix
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Registered: 03/20/05
Posts: 1,504
Last seen: 11 years, 8 days
Re: killed the obeserver... [Re: redgreenvines]
    #4362371 - 07/02/05 06:29 AM (11 years, 5 months ago)

You integrated the part of yourself you where disturbed by..


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My Unitarian Jihad Name is: The Shotgun of Sweet Reason


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InvisibleSinbad
Living TheMoment
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Registered: 12/23/04
Posts: 2,571
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Re: killed the obeserver... [Re: fresh313]
    #4362391 - 07/02/05 06:56 AM (11 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

fresh313 said:
i dont know what happened to Sinbad's post, he directed to search for 'Dzogchen' , i found this http://www.nyingma.com/dzogchen1.htm




I sent it to him in a PM, becuase i thought it more appropriate. But yes, in any expereince, that which remians untatined and unstained, is the primodial awarness that is referred to in Dzogchen. This is what the oringinal poster was referring to. If he is living within that presence then he is already connected strongly to the Dzogchen teachings, so i thought it wise to inform him of this in a PM rather than openly on this board, becuase the Dzogchen teachings are something very personal.

if anyone is interested, Choygyal Namkia Norbu Rinpoche, who is a very famous Dzogchen master is giving live teachings over the internet for the nest few days. He has already given teachings for the ast two days. But if anyone is interested, they can find out how to link up to the rest of the teachings at http://www.ambientiweb.com/webcast


--------------------


Edited by Sinbad (07/02/05 07:07 AM)


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Invisibleredgreenvines
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Re: rescuing the obeserver... [Re: Sinbad]
    #4366044 - 07/03/05 12:00 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

i liked the part about
Quote:

The everyday practice of dzogchen is simply to develop a complete carefree acceptance, an openness to all situations without limit.

We should realise openness as the playground of our emotions and relate to people without artificiality, manipulation or strategy.

We should experience everything totally, never withdrawing into ourselves as a marmot hides in its hole. This practice releases
tremendous energy which is usually constricted by the process of maintaining fixed reference points. Referentiality is the process by
which we retreat from the direct experience of everyday life.

Being present in the moment may initially trigger fear. But by welcoming the sensation of fear with complete openness, we cut through
the barriers created by habitual emotional patterns.






it is again the whole teaching in a nutshell:

internal referentiality is the thing to avoid, i.e. dropping clinging and comparing everything as an objective task.

non judgemental acceptance of everything is the task to pick up. including of accepting emotions as they are in the moment including fear etc. - whatever is happenning.

utterly simple, immensely valuable. keeps you from withdrawing into your self, no matter how well decorated the walls may be. letting the guard down as it were (the body armour).

very lovely. much of the rest of the document also deals with how you can share it (natural enlightenment) with others, though of course in sharing it you have to be actively going this nonjudgemental way already (adjsuted to the isness - the already perfect-ness), errr not just pointing at the well decorated walls inside the cultured self, of the clubhouse or membership etc. all of which promotes retreating even further inward and away from the ongoing magnificence of totality.


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InvisibleIcelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery
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Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 93,974
Loc: underbelly
Re: rescuing the obeserver... [Re: redgreenvines]
    #4366052 - 07/03/05 12:06 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

Yes!


--------------------
"Don't believe everything you think". -Anom.

" All that lives was born to die"-Anom.

With much wisdom comes much sorrow,
The more knowledge, the more grief.
Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC


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Invisiblegema
Freedom from the Known
 Arcade Champion: Ms. Pacman, Pac Man, Tetris

Registered: 10/24/04
Posts: 1,767
Loc: t(here)
Re: killed the obeserver... [Re: AnneBonney]
    #4366055 - 07/03/05 12:08 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

the observer is the observed.


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OfflineRedNucleus
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Registered: 02/27/01
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Re: killed the obeserver... [Re: AnneBonney]
    #4366083 - 07/03/05 12:21 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

Hi. I used to be this way as well. I know exactly what you mean. I think if you do enough drugs your mind starts to go with the flow, and your eternal mental sobriety becomes changed by the drug.

Still, I can keep a tight grip on what's going on depending on the drug. I have never vomited on someone's floor while drunk, for instance. Even if I am super wasted, I always have a clue. However, it's more like autopilot nowadays than mental clarity.

I very rarely drink and even more rarely use any drug; I don't mean to sound like a fiend.


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OfflineRedNucleus
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Re: killed the obeserver... [Re: Sinbad]
    #4366094 - 07/03/05 12:26 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

4-6 AM Eastern Time, for the next 3 days, if I'm not mistaken?


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InvisibleSinbad
Living TheMoment
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Registered: 12/23/04
Posts: 2,571
Loc: Under The Bodhi Tree
Re: killed the obeserver... [Re: RedNucleus]
    #4366193 - 07/03/05 01:24 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

Yes, ive been listening everyday, and without a doubt these are the most profound teachings i have ever come accross. Choygyal Namkai Norbu is truly a Precious Jewel. I have recorded all of the teachings thus far as well, if anyone cannot listen but would like too. PM me if you would like to recive these recordings.


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OfflineAnneBonney
Sailor
Registered: 07/01/05
Posts: 3
Last seen: 11 years, 4 months
Re: killed the obeserver... [Re: Sinbad]
    #4369816 - 07/04/05 05:49 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

hello and thanks for the welcome and the info. i looked up Dzogchen, well, might just be what i'm up to...dunno, two days ago i nearly thought myself to the point of losing it (again)...i can think myself to the point of fainting, can you believe that...

i mean, isn't that whole enlightenment thing supposed to be pleasant? meself (on some maniac trip through spain, at the moment), i only feel terribly tired, have a headache, get weird visions and every time i thing too much about my "true nature" i start spinning like a frog in a mixer...

how about that guru who"s supposed to show up when the disciple is ready?

anyway, thanks for your replys, i'm learning loads from this board...


--------------------
People...they're just the world making funny faces at you...


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OfflineGomp
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Re: killed the obeserver... [Re: AnneBonney]
    #4369896 - 07/04/05 06:35 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

it was a same..

:smile:


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Disclaimer!?


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InvisibleIcelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery
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Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 93,974
Loc: underbelly
Re: killed the obeserver... [Re: AnneBonney]
    #4370267 - 07/04/05 09:55 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

how about that guru who"s supposed to show up when the disciple is ready?

Damn I never had a guru show up. I started running out of time, so I became my own.  I do have a really great girlfriend though!  :grin: :thumbup:


--------------------
"Don't believe everything you think". -Anom.

" All that lives was born to die"-Anom.

With much wisdom comes much sorrow,
The more knowledge, the more grief.
Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC


Post Extras: Print Post  Remind Me! Notify Moderator
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