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Schizophrenia, Immortality, Tree of knowledge
    #22647335 -

Hey guys I thought I would come here to get some things off my chest. I am a diagnosed schizophrenic. It all started in 2012 after a series of magic mushroom trips. After tripping awhile I became delusional and paranoid. I started thinking that the world was a big evil machine sucking the life out of every individual, or battery in the matrix. Literally sucking them dry until they turn old and die. I thought that with the newly found expanded mind I had unlocked that I could easily take over the world from my bed and make a million dollars easily. I became convinced that everything in the world that we consume is being poisoned by the elites to control the population. I believed by intuition that the oral consumption of cannabis was they key to health and ever lasting life. after a couple of hospitalizations and quitting drugs and being stable for a while, something strange happened. I bought terrence mckennas book food of the gods and was surprised to read the passage in genesis "behold the man has become one of us, knowing good and evil now lest he put forth his hand and take also of the tree of life and eat and live forever. in this book terrence says that the magic mushroom is the original tree of knowledge, so I immediatly started thinking that i had become enlightened, know the secret of the death machine, and was destined to bring eternal life back to the human race. In the book terrence mentions soma which gives eternal life. After research I had come to believe that somas secret identity was cannabis. I recently read a book called "cannabis the key to becoming nigh-immortal. I also believe there are messages about death and immortality in the doors music, and personally believe jim morrison faked his death to escape it.

Now im always thinking about going up into the mountains and building a log cabin and living a poison free existance with the tree of life - or soma, or medical cannabis, what ever you want to call it and living to at least 200

I know I have gone totally mad

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Re: Schizophrenia, Immortality, Tree of knowledge [Re: DerekSeip]
    #22647367 -

Ask your doctor if there is anyway you could be treated without medication. If there is, try that. If not, or if that doesn't work, then I would say you should probably take medication.


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"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment" - Ralph Waldo Emerson

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Re: Schizophrenia, Immortality, Tree of knowledge [Re: HardTrippin]
    #22647382 -

Do you think what I am thinking is totally crazy?

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Re: Schizophrenia, Immortality, Tree of knowledge [Re: DerekSeip]
    #22647403 -

I appreciate your candor in describing your delusions.  Without trying to be offensive, it seems clear that your diagnosis, or a diagnosis very much like it, would be correct.  Marijuana is particularly unconstructive for someone with schizophrenia to take.  It's way, way more trouble than it's worth for you or anyone with your condition.  I would say lay off the substance use for a while, and see if you can't get your mind right without medicinal therapy.  If you don't make progress that you're aware of, or if you can't stay off the weed, I would recommend seeing a doctor and taking oral medication.  You'd be a lot better off not having delusional thoughts, although I know it wouldn't be as much fun.  It all depends on how much reverence for the truth you have.


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Vi Veri Universum Vivus Vici

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Re: Schizophrenia, Immortality, Tree of knowledge [Re: DerekSeip]
    #22647443 -

It's not crazy its in art throughout the world.

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Re: Schizophrenia, Immortality, Tree of knowledge [Re: DividedQuantum]
    #22647444 -

A bit alarming that mushrooms set it off... I've had severe psychotic symptoms in the past, resulting in a schizophrenia diagnosis, but it's all in remission now. I was planning on taking some mushrooms next season but I'll keep this in mind... maybe just become a booze hound. :sun:


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My solitude...
My shield...
My armour...

TESTED
WITH
FULL
FORCE

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Re: Schizophrenia, Immortality, Tree of knowledge [Re: DividedQuantum]
    #22647445 -

I do take medication, heres a music video I made

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Re: Schizophrenia, Immortality, Tree of knowledge [Re: DerekSeip]
    #22647449 -

lol.

So, uhm, what medication are you on?


--------------------
My solitude...
My shield...
My armour...

TESTED
WITH
FULL
FORCE

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Re: Schizophrenia, Immortality, Tree of knowledge [Re: DerekSeip]
    #22647455 -

I agree with HardTrippin and DividedQuantum,

in the meantime perhaps there is a way to enjoy life a bit without  thinking so much, -- you know like riding a bicycle, digging in the garden, -- anything physical

it is not necessary to take most of our thoughts so seriously.

some simple physical activity sometimes works wonders

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Re: Schizophrenia, Immortality, Tree of knowledge [Re: laughingdog]
    #22650311 -

Realizations are always true..you need to know to not discount or dis take any one of them specifically and then learn to write in graphic novels or poetry..to set your mind at ease..and there in you can teach us what you have learned..like a shaman.. In the olden days..they were not diagnosed with Schizophrenia..but were told by the group or clan that they were mystics..or even voyagers...like shamans..and that their role in the culture was to subdue and explain the otherworldly domains to the common day folk..that may go hunting or collecting of berries for example...and therein lies the nuance itself..which is kind of like a missing link in the library..there is going to be a book on each individual subject..and keeping them all IS INDEED Objective! So we have no book burnings..or witch hunts anymore..so that we can come out in the open..and show our magical skill...in schools and in evidence that Miracles are real..and the forlorn rainbow of truth will prevail..in all the meta sciences of time..and the forlorn nutrient of the guild itself..which is indeed the Tree of Life..and from there we get the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil..and from there we find the Sequitur..of the most common made Bride..which is made in Braids..or Pony tails..or even Mohawks..the notice is inside the time itself..which like a cube, can expand to any direction on Earth..and in a Sphere can totally encapsulate a notion or not of a truth..from the knots of Mother Earth.. which are like twisted roots or vines...and therein lies the mechanics of the force..which is ever novel and more chaotic than the last..but is also most well in orderly significance towarding which is what I tower or term to coin the word..Morbid is only a design of the most Frenching Matter at Hand; And sometimes the mourning is a moving beacon of the light of the times themselves...and that in and of itself is a Light house...and that is where we find our light..internally and externally..broad across all regions..and into and out of the fraternal light itself...or Freemason Compost!


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Thank you for your Time...

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Re: Schizophrenia, Immortality, Tree of knowledge [Re: BrendanFlock]
    #22650542 -

some of the most intelligent people and inventors that are well know throughout history have had some sort of mental disorder IMO.  it is the suppression of these disorders(as they are refereed to) with such things as antipsychotics that could possibly numb the effects and possible positive outcomes they could lead to due to the way society views this issue, due to how they are treated.

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Re: Schizophrenia, Immortality, Tree of knowledge [Re: DerekSeip]
    #22651765 -

DerekSeip said:
I do take medication, heres a music video I made



HAHAHA That is the best thing I've ever seen!

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Re: Schizophrenia, Immortality, Tree of knowledge [Re: enlightened seed] * 1
    #22651968 -

enlightened seed said:
some of the most intelligent people and inventors that are well know throughout history have had some sort of mental disorder IMO.  it is the suppression of these disorders(as they are refereed to) with such things as antipsychotics that could possibly numb the effects and possible positive outcomes they could lead to due to the way society views this issue, due to how they are treated.


But then you could say this take allows schizophrenia to get worse and commits the brain to ongoing grey matter loss.

In the mental ward, where I've been 3 times, the people there were not creative and mystical, they weren't even aware they were talking in paradoxical, meaningless sentences and they didn't even care that nobody responded.

When I was in the depths of it I didn't even have a mind. I was blank, completely unable to be 'creative' or 'mystical'.

I'm not having a go, just presenting another side of the story.


--------------------
My solitude...
My shield...
My armour...

TESTED
WITH
FULL
FORCE

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Re: Schizophrenia, Immortality, Tree of knowledge [Re: circastes]
    #22652165 -

circastes said:
enlightened seed said:
some of the most intelligent people and inventors that are well know throughout history have had some sort of mental disorder IMO.  it is the suppression of these disorders(as they are refereed to) with such things as antipsychotics that could possibly numb the effects and possible positive outcomes they could lead to due to the way society views this issue, due to how they are treated.


But then you could say this take allows schizophrenia to get worse and commits the brain to ongoing grey matter loss.

In the mental ward, where I've been 3 times, the people there were not creative and mystical, they weren't even aware they were talking in paradoxical, meaningless sentences and they didn't even care that nobody responded.

When I was in the depths of it I didn't even have a mind. I was blank, completely unable to be 'creative' or 'mystical'.

I'm not having a go, just presenting another side of the story.


well i have been diagnosed with a mental disorder, unspecified.

which means it meets none of the criteria as is used to diagnose people with certain disorders. 

i was told that my symptoms were very atypical. 

on some paperwork i received from one of the doctors it said schizophrenic. 

the psychiatrist has been dumbfounded that none of the medications work. 

i am thinking it is either something i have to learn to deal with or something i myself can get rid of. 

leaning on the latter.

edit :  i think that there are quite a few people out there who have mental disorders which are undiagnosed. 

maybe they are just borderline mental disorders but i do think that there is something which causes them. 

whether it be genetic mutations or something in the atmosphere such as the food we eat or the air we breath, which could be false.

i do not know but they may be contributing factors. 

Edited by enlightened seed (12/13/15 10:05 PM)

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Re: Schizophrenia, Immortality, Tree of knowledge [Re: enlightened seed]
    #22652225 -

When taking part in the psychedelic experience or suffering 'disorders' I don't think you can dismiss that there are mysterious beings that take part in and manifest symptoms of 'mental illness.'

Quote:
On the mental ward, Dr Somé saw a lot of “beings” hanging around the patients, “entities” that are invisible to most people but that shamans and psychics are able to see. “They were causing the crisis in these people,” he says. It appeared to him that these beings were trying to get the medications and their effects out of the bodies of the people the beings were trying to merge with, and were increasing the patients’ pain in the process. “The beings were acting almost like some kind of excavator in the energy field of people. They were really fierce about that. The people they were doing that to were just screaming and yelling,” he said. He couldn’t stay in that environment and had to leave.

In the Dagara tradition, the community helps the person reconcile the energies of both worlds–”the world of the spirit that he or she is merged with, and the village and community.” That person is able then to serve as a bridge between the worlds and help the living with information and healing they need. Thus, the spiritual crisis ends with the birth of another healer. “The other world’s relationship with our world is one of sponsorship,” Dr. Somé explains. “More often than not, the knowledge and skills that arise from this kind of merger are a knowledge or a skill that is provided directly from the other world.”


http://www.wakingtimes.com/2014/08/22/shaman-sees-mental-hospital/

Good article.

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Re: Schizophrenia, Immortality, Tree of knowledge [Re: FishOilTheKid]
    #22652244 -

when i consume a significant amount of something often referred to as cubes(i like to put them in "00" capsules) it is a fantastic feeling which i prefer to experience on my own. 

i think my poor eye sight is the cause as to why i can not receive the full benefits of them. 

or maybe i had ought to just close my eyes.

Edited by enlightened seed (12/13/15 10:20 PM)

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Re: Schizophrenia, Immortality, Tree of knowledge [Re: enlightened seed]
    #22652663 -

Interesting.  I have astigmatism and I'm required by law to where corrective lenses when I drive.  My last two trips seemed like they sharped my vision although temporarily.  Such a nice vibe and such wonderful subtle effects.

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Re: Schizophrenia, Immortality, Tree of knowledge [Re: FishOilTheKid]
    #22659816 -

5 to 1 baby 1 in 5 no one here gets out alive you get yours I'll get mine, gonna make it baby in our prime , blood in the streets it's up to my ankles, meeting you at your mothers gate I will tell you what you must do to survive, flee the blood stained streets and poisoned wells of your father enter the sweet forest, an ancient lunatic reigns in the trees of the night, take a long holiday let your children play, if you give this man a ride sweet family will die, girl you gotta love your man the world on you depends our life will never end, ride the snake to the ancient lake, choose the ancient ones beside the ancient lake, show me the way to the next whiskey bar oh don't ask why: I tell you we must die, the day destroys the night night divides the day tried to run tried to hide break on through to the other side, let me sleep all night in your soul kitchen, speaking secret alphabets,

Some wise words from jim morrison

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Re: Schizophrenia, Immortality, Tree of knowledge [Re: DerekSeip]
    #22682049 -

When I had my psychotic experience for like two weeks I felt it to be completely spiritual, mystical and religious in nature. I was hospitalized and during that time I was in this amazing state of religious and spiritual mystical possession and entrainment with some kind of mythological process- as though the events of my life were of biblical significance...


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Everything I post is fiction.

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Re: Schizophrenia, Immortality, Tree of knowledge [Re: Moonshoe]
    #22682209 -

Maaaan...!!  I've been there.  They just labeled me Bipolar but that explains nothing of what I went through.  They call it religious preoccupation, paranoid, delusional, etc.  They ruled that I am 'gravely disabled' with the state superior court.  Its taken allot of reflection and time to piece back together what the hell happened after the forced meds and what not.  I had a true awakening and contact with non human entities, the harbinger of death, and experienced the end of the world.  Which in other schools of thought is acknowledged as a sort of death and rebirth event that sparks true change.  I felt it was all interrupted to claim that I am insane legally.  ...To hide what I had found.

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