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Comedy Gold: Rhetorical Genius explains.... well, something, I guess
    #8499983 -

If I were to type this out as a transcript and post it here, the majority of the denizens of this forum would believe it was another speech by good ole fumblemouth Bush. And who could blame them?

Fortunately, there's no need to rely on just a transcript. We have video:



I can imagine The Lightworker now, dealing with the sermon on the mount -

Quote:
Blessed are the poor in spirit, for they... the thing is, it costs the poor... wait, the poor. There are costs. Please, you're confusing me. Please let me get this straight.
The poor, they have this spirit, and it costs about the same... Okay. It costs something.

Blessed are the meek, for they shall inherit... what was that? Yes I'm glad you're fired up. I'm talking about the poor in spirit. No wait, I'm on to the meek now. It costs about the same to feed the meek as it does to put a man on the moon.

I think. Wait, no, let me check my math.

It costs less to feed the meek than it does to build a missile. Yes, less. So we could have this missile, or we could feed the meek. I guess maybe we could do both if we left Iraq. So missiles, and feeding the meek. Pretty good deal.

Blessed are they which do hunger and thirst... Wait, I guess we're supposed to be feeding those who do hunger. All that stuff I said about the meek? I meant it about those who hunger. So, we can feed those who hunger. The meek... I guess we don't have to feed them, because they're usually pretty thin and don't eat a lot.

Yeah, right, the meek are pretty easy to feed, I think. So, actually, you know when I said to ignore what I said about feeding the meek? Ignore that. We can feed both those who do hunger and the meek for about what it costs... it costs something. The costs. We could feed them for the costs. Whatever those costs are. Again I think it has to do with the price of Iraq.

Blessed are the merciful, for they shall obtain mercy. Also we could probably feed them. Since we're feeding the hungry and the meek, I guess it wouldn't be too hard just to put down another plate and feed the merciful too. Because of Iraq.

See, we're leaving Iraq. We have all of our food in Iraq. We leave Iraq, we can feed the meek, the merciful, and those who are actually hungry. Pretty sweet deal.

Blessed are the peacemakers, for they will bring the potato salad. There are costs... Potato salad costs money. We have money going into Iraq for non-potato-salad expenses. We pull out, the costs, you see the costs, we can put that right into potato salad. The peacemakers will bring it.

German style too, if you don't like all that mayonnaise. I like both, actually, so it's cool with me either way.

You can't have a picnic without potato salad.

That's why the peacemakers are so cool.

Rejoice, and have a Fresca. There are costs to Fresca, but I think the meek can handle it. I think they can swing bringing Fresca. Oh, and buns. That's pretty cheap. Fresca and buns. There are costs, but then, Iraq.

The meek shall also bring the meat.

I know I have the meek bringing a lot of stuff now, but the meek are inheriting the earth, I think, so they're still coming out way ahead on the deal.

I'm tired. I haven't slept much in forty eight hours.

Oh shit-- someone has to bring a vegetarian meal.

I guess we'll stick that on the meek, again. I think they're mostly vegetarians anyway. Besides, they're meek, so they probably won't complain. That's what makes them meek.

Costs.



Sermon on the mount parody from Ace of Spades at ace.mu.nu







Phred


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Re: Comedy Gold: Rhetorical Genius explains.... well, something, I guess [Re: Phred]
    #8500276 -

The meek shall also bring the meat.


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Re: Comedy Gold: Rhetorical Genius explains.... well, something, I guess [Re: Phred]
    #8500359 -

Bush speaks like this, yet you support his presidency. Where is the consistency?

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Re: Comedy Gold: Rhetorical Genius explains.... well, something, I guess [Re: Redstorm]
    #8500393 -

The thing is -

1) Bush doesn't speak like this. At least, I've never come across anything from Bush anywhere close to as bad as this, and believe me, if there were anything out there even half that bad from Bush, it would have been posted in this forum by now. Dozens of times. Probably hundreds.

2) Obama has nothing going for him except his supposed compelling speaking ability. He has no experience, no platform other than the standard one of the hard left fringe of the Democratic party, no political accomplishments... nothing but his supposed better judgment (and we've all seen how that's worked out so far) and his "charismatic" speaking ability. As you will recall from my comments on his "great race speech", I have found even his scripted speeches read from teleprompters to be mediocre at best. His extemporaneous remarks are flat out awful - see his dismal performances at the debates.

McCain's campaign advisors were doing their jobs by having McCain challenge Obama to some Town Hall style debates - Obama will stumble all over himself at such venues.




Phred


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Re: Comedy Gold: Rhetorical Genius explains.... well, something, I guess [Re: Phred]
    #8500406 -

Hey, at least Bush gets it right every so often.



Also, you are flat out insane if you believe Bush speaks better or even close to equal as Obama does.

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Re: Comedy Gold: Rhetorical Genius explains.... well, something, I guess [Re: Redstorm]
    #8500485 -

Bush certainly speaks better than Obama was speaking in the video I posted, that's for damn sure. Of course, toothless smokehounds clutching three-quarters empty bottles of Ripple ricocheting off opposing sides of the alleyway on their way to the soup kitchen speak better than Obama was speaking in that video, so I'm damning with faint praise, I guess...





Phred


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Re: Comedy Gold: Rhetorical Genius explains.... well, something, I guess [Re: Phred]
    #8500584 -

lets see..

1) people were interrupting him and he lost his train of thought
2) on another one of the obama "gaffe" videos, he admits to not having much sleep in the 48 hours prior to making the speech

no one is saying obama is perfect, but at least put the shit in context. bush has stumbled and fumbled through the english language for 8 years now, with no one interrupting him and no apparent lack of sleep. so whats his excuse? that he's an idiot? what about all the mistakes mccain has made while speaking?

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Re: Comedy Gold: Rhetorical Genius explains.... well, something, I guess [Re: danknugz81]
    #8501026 -

Quote:
Bush doesn't speak like this. At least, I've never come across anything from Bush anywhere close to as bad as this, and believe me, if there were anything out there even half that bad from Bush, it would have been posted in this forum by now. Dozens of times. Probably hundreds


Quote:
Bush certainly speaks better than Obama was speaking in the video I posted, that's for damn sure. Of course, toothless smokehounds clutching three-quarters empty bottles of Ripple ricocheting off opposing sides of the alleyway on their way to the soup kitchen speak better than Obama was speaking in that video, so I'm damning with faint praise, I guess...



How can you expect anyone to ever take you seriously when you make statements like that? You must be delusional to think that one distracted statement made by Obama is somehow worse than President Bush's daily butchery of the English language.  There are literally hours of Bush stumbling over prepared speeches, using the word "awesome" four times in 10 minutes, using words like "childrens" and "internets" as opposed to just children or internet, making up words like "recruitiments", "suiciders", and "misunderestimated". The man stumbles over common sayings like "fool me twice, shame on me" as if it were Shakespeare, yet somehow Obama is the worse speaker. Amazing. 

How ridiculous is it that you hold up 45 seconds of footage as if it were enough evidence anyone would ever need to make a decision as important as whom they would choose to be the leader of the Free World?  The link that follows is one minute of John McCain misrepresenting troop levels in Iraq.  It is a fact that we are still above pre-surge levels one year later.  This comes from a candidate who is running almost solely on his reputation as a "straight-talker", and master of national defense matters.  Personally, I think that the election of the President should be based on substantive issues, and not on whether one of the candidates stumbled a little in one of the thousands of speeches he has made in the last year and a half.  Maybe that's just me.



"Our enemies are innovative and resourceful, and so are we. They never stop thinking about new ways to harm our country and our people, and neither do we." —President George W. Bush, Washington, D.C., Aug. 5, 2004.

Now, that's comedy gold.


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I am become death, the destroyer of worlds.

Edited by thedefone (06/08/08 06:52 PM)

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Re: Comedy Gold: Rhetorical Genius explains.... well, something, I guess [Re: Phred]
    #8501805 -

:whatever:


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All I know is The Growery is a place where losers who get banned here go.

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Re: Comedy Gold: Rhetorical Genius explains.... well, something, I guess [Re: afoaf]
    #8501878 -

Quote:
1) Bush doesn't speak like this. At least, I've never come across anything from Bush anywhere close to as bad as this, and believe me, if there were anything out there even half that bad from Bush, it would have been posted in this forum by now. Dozens of times. Probably hundreds.




Haha get the fuck out of here man. The more statements you make like this fewer and fewer people will give your opinions any credibility.

Obama stumbled on his words and that is indeed a pretty awful sounding clip you've presented us yet I don't see how this can possibly abrogate the routinely high quality of Obama's rhetoric. This sort of thing happens to even the best of politicians at times and this is hardly representative of the speeches which Obama routinely delivers. If he was so ineffective at speaking at town hall meetings like this one, why pray tell, was he so overwhelmingly successful in these meetings and caucuses throughout the primary season?

Bush on the other hand is the exact opposite of this. He repeatedly makes awful 'speeches' if you could even muster the gall to call them that and cannot seem to string a coherent sentence together. I'd be hard pressed to find a single speech wherein Bush delivers his speech effectively and does not come across as a total fucking idiot. Reagan, as much as I disagreed with his policies, knew how to give a speech and rhetoric is one of the most important weapons in a politician's arsenal.

On an almost daily basis Bush makes cringe-worthy comments and stumbles so badly on his words that it makes me, as an American, cringe in embarrassment. This bumbling idiot has damaged our prestige and diplomatic sway throughout the world but this wont register with you as you're a Canadian who's never even lived in the US.

You've tried attacking everything else about Obama and you're clearly very desperate to come up with negative things about him, almost obsessively so. 

Keep amusing us with these blatantly desperate posts.

Edited by Virus_with_Shoes (06/08/08 11:31 PM)

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Re: Comedy Gold: Rhetorical Genius explains.... well, something, I guess [Re: Virus_with_Shoes]
    #8501925 -

Quote:
Virus_with_Shoes said:This bumbling idiot has damaged our prestige and diplomatic sway throughout the world but this wont register with you as you're a Canadian who's never even lived in the US.




This keeps getting bandied around like it means something.

Give an example.  Any example.  Please.



Don't strain yourself too hard though, because it really is a load of bullshit.


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i finally got around to making a sig
revel in its glory and quake in fear at its might
grar.

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Re: Comedy Gold: Rhetorical Genius explains.... well, something, I guess [Re: Mushmonkey]
    #8501964 -

So... you're saying it doesn't matter that other countries widely distrust and disapprove of our country and it's leadership?

An example? Surely. Here's a summary of a gallop poll on world opinion of the US:
"Confidence in President Bush, which was already sagging, has dropped further in most countries over the past year. Global distrust of American leadership is reflected in increasing disapproval of the cornerstones of United States foreign policy, according to the survey report."



http://www.nytimes.com/2007/06/28/world/americas/28pew.html

Also, mush, have you by any chance lived outside of the US and talked to anyone about world politics? It'd probably be quite eye-opening. I have never met anyone on 3 different continents that had anything good to say about Bush.


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Re: Comedy Gold: Rhetorical Genius explains.... well, something, I guess [Re: Mushmonkey]
    #8502093 -

Mushmonkey said:
Quote:
Virus_with_Shoes said:This bumbling idiot has damaged our prestige and diplomatic sway throughout the world but this wont register with you as you're a Canadian who's never even lived in the US.




This keeps getting bandied around like it means something.

Give an example.  Any example.  Please.




Don't strain yourself too hard though, because it really is a load of bullshit.



way to live in a cave with fox news on constantly.


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praise "Bob"
did you mean shmooed-R.I.P.

"drought besets the mind, decay besets the man"-me

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Re: Comedy Gold: Rhetorical Genius explains.... well, something, I guess [Re: Virus_with_Shoes]
    #8502431 -

People don't like America.  Ok....  big deal.  All you've posted is an opinion poll.  That's a pretty far cry from any actual, tangible change in anything.

They're still eating big macs and wearing blue jeans, and only an idiot would underestimate or brush off the economic, or military, might of this country.  Christ, look at China!  Who fucking likes China, their human rights record is worse than ours, and people don't like them -- but their prestige and diplomatic sway is as strong as ever because they are a military might, and an economic juggernaut.

The President of the United States could attend an international conference on human rights and wag his dick at the world...  and yanno what, they'd still have to fucking deal with an America that holds the same prestige and diplomatic sway as it always has.  They'd just talk shit about the President.


You are inflating the role of the President.  He is not the nation.  He does not control the nation.  He's never around for more than 8 years.  He can make us the butt of jokes, but he cannot significantly lessen our international clout because our international clout is not the result of the strength of our President but rather the strength of our Nation.


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i finally got around to making a sig
revel in its glory and quake in fear at its might
grar.

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Re: Comedy Gold: Rhetorical Genius explains.... well, something, I guess [Re: Phred]
    #8502636 -

Are you kidding me?? He stumbles over one sentence whilst being interrupted. Big deal!! How you can possibly compare that to some of the unbelievable stuff Bush has come out with is beyond me. Grasping at straws that arent even there dude.


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Always Smi2le

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Re: Comedy Gold: Rhetorical Genius explains.... well, something, I guess [Re: Mushmonkey]
    #8502784 -

Mushmonkey said:
People don't like America.  Ok....  big deal.  All you've posted is an opinion poll.  That's a pretty far cry from any actual, tangible change in anything.

They're still eating big macs and wearing blue jeans, and only an idiot would underestimate or brush off the economic, or military, might of this country.  Christ, look at China!  Who fucking likes China, their human rights record is worse than ours, and people don't like them -- but their prestige and diplomatic sway is as strong as ever because they are a military might, and an economic juggernaut.

The President of the United States could attend an international conference on human rights and wag his dick at the world...  and yanno what, they'd still have to fucking deal with an America that holds the same prestige and diplomatic sway as it always has.  They'd just talk shit about the President.


You are inflating the role of the President.  He is not the nation.  He does not control the nation.  He's never around for more than 8 years.  He can make us the butt of jokes, but he cannot significantly lessen our international clout because our international clout is not the result of the strength of our President but rather the strength of our Nation.



i'm sorry, but i don't want to be represented on the world stage by a fuck-tard. not to mention, how is the dollar doing these days? i enjoy this country, for the most part, but we're not invincible. no he could not go "wag his dick" at the world and everyone still respect us. the world knows we're a democracy, and guess what, that means they know WE ELECT THE PRESIDENT. how would we hold diplomatic sway if the rest of the world just thinks we all just want to wag our dicks at people, or at least elect someone who will. coupled by the fact that our money is getting less valuable i think we are getting less sway.

oh, and i don't think people eating big macs is indicative of our influence. and just because our military is strong doesn't mean that people have to respect us. fuck, right now our president is wasting it's might making us more enemies instead of defending us by finding the people who caused the ruckus of 911.

by the way, were you a bully in school? why do you think people have to respect a strong military. if people are our allies out of fear their just going to wait for the day they can take us out. what the hell kind of logic tells you it would be a good thing that the world will still respect us because of our military might? it's good we have a strong military, but the world should respect us, not fear us.

bottom line, we elect the president and the world knows that. he is our representative to them.

and as far as this thread in general goes... obama has my vote, this video is not common place for his speaking efforts. for fuck's sake, why don't you just cut one word out of a bunch of different speeches he's made so when you edit it together the video is all jumpy but it sounds like he's a terrorist or something. it would be about the same thing as using this video to represent all of his speeches. did you get this from fox news or something, because it seems like the kind of dumbass thing they would try to report as credible justification for not voting for the best candidate.


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praise "Bob"
did you mean shmooed-R.I.P.

"drought besets the mind, decay besets the man"-me

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Re: Comedy Gold: Rhetorical Genius explains.... well, something, I guess [Re: Phred]
    #8504041 -

Obama the "GREAT" orator!

:rofl2:


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America's debt problem is a "sign of leadership failure"

We have "reckless fiscal policies"

America has a debt problem and a failure of leadership.

Americans deserve better

Barack Obama

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Re: Comedy Gold: Rhetorical Genius explains.... well, something, I guess [Re: afoaf]
    #8504051 -

afoaf said:
:whatever:




Its all funny when its about Bush.

What you cant take what you dish out?


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America's debt problem is a "sign of leadership failure"

We have "reckless fiscal policies"

America has a debt problem and a failure of leadership.

Americans deserve better

Barack Obama

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Re: Comedy Gold: Rhetorical Genius explains.... well, something, I guess [Re: Redstorm]
    #8504243 -

> Bush speaks like this,

Nah, Bush tends to make good one liner mistakes that are often Freudian slips stating the exact opposite of what he is trying to convey.  The Obama video was nothing like that.  All I got from Obama is that whatever he is talking about is going to cost... and considering that all that came out, as he stammered for words, was the word "cost", it must cost a hell-of-a-lot.  It was almost like somebody blocked the signal from his remote controllers at the CFR. 

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Re: Comedy Gold: Rhetorical Genius explains.... well, something, I guess [Re: Seuss]
    #8504449 -

Quote:
These suppositions are taken to task in this article by Michael Gerson. Gerson makes three general points: we are not overwhelmingly despised by the whole world as the Dems would claim, we won't necessarily become more popular if we reverse Bush policies, and popularity doesn't necessarily translate into influence.

According to a Pew research poll Gerson cited, several areas of the world love America: Sub Sahara in Africa, New Europe, much of Latin America, India, and Japan. Much of the perception of the world hating America comes from animosity from old Europe and the Middle East.



http://theeprovocateur.blogspot.com/2008/03/myth-of-americas-unpopularity.html

And Old Europe is tending......rightward.  Germany, France, Italy, England keep repudiating leftists at a record pace.

The notion that a sample of personal contacts a 20 something shroom head has is indicative of any kind of consensus is just so self-absorbed and narcissistic as to make me believe that the holder of such an idea is so deluded as to be in danger of institutionalization.  For his own good.


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