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Invisiblewhiterasta
Day careobserver
 User Gallery
Registered: 04/09/02
Posts: 1,780
Loc: Oregon
the biggest trip
    #623888 - 05/01/02 10:39 AM (15 years, 2 months ago)

Well atrip to the cardiologist and a bunch of tests say that I should plan the big shebang trip home soon.I intend to do this at a time of my chosing as opposed to leaving fate to fuck over my fam if I take the long slow ride down.With this in mind I think that a massive cacti-fungi-xanax combination will be what i will use.I go almost eagerly having glimpsed paradise.Bon Chance WR


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To old for this place


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InvisibleSclorch
Clyster

Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 07/13/99
Posts: 4,805
Loc: On the Brink of Madness
Re: the biggest trip [Re: whiterasta]
    #623891 - 05/01/02 10:47 AM (15 years, 2 months ago)

I take it you're lights are dimming...

Lovely post.
No really, there are many impressionable people in here...
I'm sure they could use your great advice.

?????


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Note: In desperate need of a cure...


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InvisibleSwami
Eggshell Walker

Registered: 01/19/00
Posts: 15,413
Loc: In the hen house
Re: the biggest trip [Re: whiterasta]
    #623896 - 05/01/02 11:01 AM (15 years, 2 months ago)

Sorry to hear of your condition, bro. I like your attitude, I would not take the news nearly as well.

Where do you live? We should have big shroomery send-off and support you on your ultimate trip.


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The proof is in the pudding.


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OfflineBlastrid
e l e m e n t al i t y
 User Gallery

Registered: 01/14/02
Posts: 3,323
Loc: The Desert
Last seen: 9 years, 5 months
Re: the biggest trip [Re: whiterasta]
    #623991 - 05/01/02 01:21 PM (15 years, 2 months ago)

i wish you luck and guidance on your ultimate journey.

what are your planned dosages? i've thought it difficult to do so much shrooms that it will end you... i'm sure you've thought that all out tho. anything you plan on doing? i spose at a certain level it doesn't matter.

best to you.


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Blas'?trid (bl?s tr?d)
    n.  3rd generation derivitave of a combination of 'bastard' and 'blasted'.  Used as both an insult or an expletive.
    ex.  Blastrid!

Stereopattern  <--My music.


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Invisiblebuttonion
Calmly Watching

Registered: 04/04/02
Posts: 303
Loc: Kansas
Re: the biggest trip [Re: whiterasta]
    #624051 - 05/01/02 02:34 PM (15 years, 2 months ago)

Wow... that's heavy. Like blastrid said, I'm sure you thought this through... I'm a psychotherapist... I know their is a huge negative stigma about seeking help or even talking to someone else about a difficult life circumstance (that supposedly you should be able to handle on your own). I guess I just want to say that it is really important to get your thoughts out in the open to someone else, to get a different perspective itself can help a lot. I'm sure you have a lot going on in your head. Don't hesitate to PM me... talk to a friend or therapist if you can. Please keep us all posted. I know everyone in this community cares a lot...






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Concepts which have been proved to be useful in ordering things easily acquire such an authority over us that we forget their human origins and accept them as invariable.- Albert Einstein


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InvisibleRevelation

 User Gallery

Registered: 08/04/01
Posts: 6,134
Loc: heart cave
Re: the biggest trip [Re: whiterasta]
    #624054 - 05/01/02 02:38 PM (15 years, 2 months ago)

That is rather inspiring, if you know what I mean. All the best.


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Invisiblewhiterasta
Day careobserver
 User Gallery
Registered: 04/09/02
Posts: 1,780
Loc: Oregon
Re: the biggest trip [Re: buttonion]
    #624380 - 05/01/02 11:03 PM (15 years, 2 months ago)

I have spoken at length with my wife about this and she is suportive.I am still having some quality of life and my condition is progressive but not rapid and have some time to arrange things.This is not a real shock as 3 yrs ago after being exposed to herbicide I had severe abdominal cramping for a month two trips to the E-room said nothing but they gave me loads of percodan still no relief well a trip to the country doc where my wife works and an antique Ekg showed heart trouble and I went to the local meat rack for an agio.showed old blockages and some congestion but 70-80% collateral regrowth (more than enough to be healthy) but while I was still wasted they had me OK a bypass op(something I wouldn't have agrreed to)BTW no one consulted my wife at all thru this whole thing.so I wake up sore as hell with a crack in my chest a ft long .Since then I have had progressivly worse atrial fibrollation,It is reaching the point where meds are not helping anymore and I will not have any more surgery.Thus I reach a decision to take things on my terms I will not burden anyone with my infirmaty and will not live wth it myself so when I am no longer able to function without my heart threatening to kill me I will use my spirit guides to nudge me over.at that point I will be weak and if I lay off the meds for aday or so my guides should be enough as I will welcome the time.I am road weary high mileage and about ready for scrapping.I sincerely hope this post is taken in a positive way.and thank you all for the kind words.
Bon Chance WR


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To old for this place


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Offlinefrogsheath
Stranger
Registered: 02/18/02
Posts: 915
Loc: Chicago, Illinois U.S.A.
Last seen: 2 years, 24 days
Re: the biggest trip [Re: whiterasta]
    #624807 - 05/02/02 12:45 PM (15 years, 1 month ago)

You have a remarkably clear head for all that. Thanks for sharing that.
peace


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OfflineWeirdShroomer
journeyman
Registered: 04/01/02
Posts: 78
Loc: Sebia
Last seen: 15 years, 1 month
Re: the biggest trip [Re: whiterasta]
    #624870 - 05/02/02 02:21 PM (15 years, 1 month ago)

Best wishes on your voyage...
Just curious what dose you gonna ingest?
Blessings


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----weird-----
Smoking dynamite can seriously blow your mind


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Invisiblebuttonion
Calmly Watching

Registered: 04/04/02
Posts: 303
Loc: Kansas
Re: the biggest trip [Re: whiterasta]
    #625128 - 05/02/02 08:04 PM (15 years, 1 month ago)

We'll be here.


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Concepts which have been proved to be useful in ordering things easily acquire such an authority over us that we forget their human origins and accept them as invariable.- Albert Einstein


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Offlineseeker
Curator ofBarbaricRefinery

Registered: 03/22/02
Posts: 128
Loc: between Here and There
Last seen: 10 years, 9 months
Re: the biggest trip [Re: whiterasta]
    #625189 - 05/02/02 09:21 PM (15 years, 1 month ago)

The Old Farmer

Time just keeps moving on
Many years have come and gone

But I grow older without regret
My hopes are in what may come yet

On this farm I work each day
This is where I wish to stay

I watch the seeds each season sprout
From the soil as the plants rise out

I study nature and I learn
To know the earth and feel her turn

I love her dearly and all her seasons
For I have learned her secret reasons

All that will live is in the bosom of earth
She is the loving mother of all birth

But all that lives must pass away
And go back again to her some day

My life too will pass from earth
But don't grieve, I say, there will be other birth

Just bury me on this farm, it's where I wish to be
So Mother Earth can claim my body and nourish new life with me

So do not stand at grave and weep
I will not be there, and I do not sleep

I will be in the many winds that blow
And the softly falling snow

I will be in the gentle showers of rain
And fields of ripening grain

I will be in the sun's warming light
And graceful birds in gliding flight

I will be in the beautiful flowers of Spring
And in every other lovely thing

So do not stand at my grave and cry
I am not there. I do not die.

- Malcom Beck with Bob Tate and Tom Levine (from The Garden-Ville Method)



P.S. - If there is some expirience after this, remember to smile and have fun.

Peace.


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In a state of anarchy every individual is their own kingdom.

Thou art God (but so am i :wink:)


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OfflineInDiCaToRgReEn
newbie
Registered: 05/02/02
Posts: 47
Last seen: 15 years, 1 day
Re: the biggest trip [Re: whiterasta]
    #625455 - 05/03/02 04:57 AM (15 years, 1 month ago)

i see someone is attempting to step into my world, if you make it here i'll be sure to send the complementary roses.


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"oh to be a kid again, not a worry in the world except mybe the lack of bubbles in the bath tub"


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OfflineMuShi_KiNg
---------|)
Registered: 09/25/01
Posts: 491
Last seen: 7 years, 1 month
Re: the biggest trip [Re: whiterasta]
    #631389 - 05/15/02 09:50 AM (15 years, 1 month ago)

Dude
Dont do it
Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr
YOu got to live till the end !!!!
So life who's bigger and stronger please dude


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Invisibleraytrace
Stranger

Registered: 01/15/02
Posts: 720
Re: the biggest trip [Re: whiterasta]
    #631797 - 05/15/02 03:33 PM (15 years, 1 month ago)

well... best wishes... whatever that means... you sound like a brave person


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