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 symantic
Stranger
Registered: 05/30/03
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 help me figure out my trip ... PLEASE 
#1592106 - 05/30/03 03:21 AM (19 years, 9 months ago) |
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After ingesting 5grammes of howegrown psylocbin, with a friend I had the scariest and weirdest trip ever.
It started with the usual laughter and eye candy visuals, melting of lines, surfaces joining together. Then all of a sudden we had forgotten who we where how we got there but for some strange reason just felt like we needed to know the time and everything would be alright. Unfortunatley we didn't have a watch or a clock in the house and where to fucked to go outside to find out the time. I called my girlfriend who was in work, but after hanging up the phone after learning of the time, I could not remember if I had called her and still felt the urge to know the time. I called her 4 times, according to my girlfriend.
After the forth time I managed to write down the time, I felt safe for some reason becuase I knew the time. I sat back down to enjoy the rest of my trip. Sitting on the couch facing my friend while he was playing guitar I closed my eyes and found that I could read my DNA and while reading it, it shoed my images, I felt like I was been giving a visual crash course in mans history. I saw ancient civilisations, danced with the druids of Ireland during their ceremonies.. as I flew through all of the information that is encoded in my DNA, I turned to my friend and said 'I am evolving, right now' . He was pretty fucked and just said sweet, but was looking at me in a weird way. I then looked at the sofa next to him where he was sitting, some voice in my brain shouted at me 'all of this, you create, all of this, you create' I understood that I created reality and started to play with it. I turned to my friend and said 'look the couch is a fountain' he turned and looked as the couch turned into a fountain, I told him to turn around and look at the curtains which where blue, I commanded them to be red and they turned red. My friend saw this to and was slowly starting to get mad at me.. when all of a sudden he turned into a creature that was not human at all and told me that I'm not allowed to do this, I'm not supposed to be here, the creature was as scared of me as I was of it. I was freaking out, then my girlfriend arrived, I got up to answer the door, still pretty fukcing freaked by the creature had turned back into my friend by the time I got back form the door. I sat back down on the couch and then both my girfriend and my friend turned into these creatures, and where telling me that I had broken the rules, I was fucking terrified and suddenly all of reality that I knew dissapeared, I was a half of a body, that was attached to a steel wall, that had cables and wires coming out of it. I was inside a giant machine, I saw scores of rows of people inside the machine. I turned to the creatures and siad 'what if I resist' they turned to me and told me I would be ejexted form the programme. I couldn't belive what was going on. Things then started to mxi up (realities that is) I coudl see parts of the machine in my realisy and parts of my house, the wall that I was attached to moved me to my bedroom and put me in what looked like my bed, the room went from looking like my bedroom and a small cell in a mass of cells inside a giant machine. My girlfriend got into the bed with me, she was asking me all kinds of fucked up questons liked, why don't I watch telly ? why dont I drink coke ? her appearance went from that of the creature and back to my girfriend every couple of seconds.
Then form his bedroom my friend called me in, my girlfriend said go to him, I went into his room well this giant wall/arm/cell that I was part of moved me his room, when I walked In I knew who the person was sitting on the bed befrore, me it was SATAN, sat on the bed with his legs crossed smoking cigar. He said to me, you have a choice, you can go back into your cell and live in the real world that you can now see and eventually die and go to heaven or you can go back inside and in a few hours everything will return to normal for you ... but you will know forever that your reality is merely an illusion. I was so scared and didn't know what was going, I said to him, I just want to go back, I just wanna go back he smilled looked at me and said go back inside and wait it out, she will look after you until the transition is complete.
I went back inside and lay on the bed but I could feel that I was attached to this machine through some pipes that ran into my spine.
I lay there and waited, I heard a voice singing, the most beautiful voice I have ever heard, a womens voice, the singing was almost like a crying, pleading tune. It was the voice of GOD, she begged and pleaded with me to do something about this now that I know the truth, so many come and see and so many do nothing she said.
The voice subsided afer a while and I waited and waited and waited until finally I coudl no longer see any of the machinery and was just lying in my bed.
I don't know what to do.. I need help
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reality is the part of the imaginatio we all agree on
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Asante
cat door for divine love
 
Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 84,022
Loc: Omnicyclion
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 Re: help me figure out my trip ... PLEASE [Re: symantic]
#1592145 - 05/30/03 04:30 AM (19 years, 9 months ago) |
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Whoa! If you're pretending you're Nobel Prize material!
It sounds pretty severe spiritually. Strong (Level 5) trips generally are in the twilight zone between the Psychedelic and the Psychotic. I mean no offence but I can't distinguish it. I don't mean you've gone mad but you may have been temporarily offwhack.
I don't believe in Satan. You likely aren't Wicca.
What I believe is that Trips work through symbolics, and that they are not necessarily based on reality. It sounds as a complete mindfuck that'squite hard to stomach, but I think it's meaning is symbolic, not literal. I see some Matrix elements in it, some religious andsome psychologic factors too. Have you seen the Matrix recently, if at all? Perhaps these movies have steered you somewhat...
My Gods!
You must be shellshocked 
I believe our realities can only be illusion, but am not alarmed by that. Watch out for the truth, especially the Truth, symantic!
The concept of knowing or not knowing the truth can drive one bonkers.
Being slightly misantropic I'd say the most dangerous people on this earth are the ones that have "found the Truth". I do not know the truth. I just have an idea of it but recognise others have equally vivid images of it that seem incompatible with mine.
Your BRAIN makes the truth & you just fed it an ample dose of Psychedelic lubricant, making your consciousness slip & slide through the corridors of your mind.
It sounds to me like a "Spiritual Bad Trip": not the one that makes maggots crawl out of your eyeballs but rather out of your soul.  These are the REALLY scary ones that can stick to you as long time if you let it.
My personal opinion is that you've been to Hellraisercountry and quite severely so. I do not think Satan sat there smoking Cubans & messing with your head. I believe in no such entity. I think you've got some spiritual fear issues (m'kay, who doesnt?) and that the Trip made you plunge in to them headfirst.
I have done alot of Seeking (Self-Inflation: can't beat THOSE prices  ) and firmly believe all iswell in the world. Life is eternal, everything is temporary into the Infinite and the doG (God inverse) is not out to get you.
My advise to you: take it easy in your life. No difficult things for you're a little fragile shortly after a heman trip like that. Your average Joe doesnt even get as scared as that on his DEATHBED, so you have plenty to cope with.
Do not take any Psychedelics for at least a month, preferably no marijuana too.
Try to steer clear of any & all recreational drugs.
Sounds pretty severe, but all those things cause Dopamine increases (especially Psychedelics, Cocaine and Amphetamine) and this may in your case carry some risks. I've seen and experienced "snapping back into a bad trip" through nasty events or a marijuana cig several times. Try to work through this difficult experience as SOBER as feels comfortable.
Do fun things that require little activity, but by all means think about the stuff. I myself believe your experience was all in your head & akin to a Bad Trip/Waking Nightmare.
I have not much LEVEL 5 experience, but the vividness and "real feel" of your OEV does not sound comfy to me. Generally Psilocybin visuals are not that "real" so please abstain from drugs for a while for your own good, OK?
You've been through a spiritual/mental/psychological crisis or you might stil be into it. Lay low for awhile & seek out beauty. And remember:
WS does Psychedelics
WS does some Opium tea every once in a while
but Wiccan_Seeker thinks "The Truth" is too hard a drug for him to handle!
Distancing yourself from the feeling to have encountered "The Truth" on that trip might act like unscrewing the detonator from the bombshell that was your trip:
I believe your belief in the Ultimate Truth is the major culprit here.
I've done at least 15 years active Seeking with quite some brainpower and have only found Personal Truths.
Don't think you can outsmart the 50 billion people that walked this earth before us.
Tu put it scientifically: we don't KNOW dick!
I'm not around often, but feel free to PM me.
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mikey_
SURFING ON SINEWAVES
Registered: 08/10/02
Posts: 370
Loc: Liverpool
Last seen: 14 years, 5 months
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Re: help me figure out my trip ... PLEASE [Re: Asante]
#1592222 - 05/30/03 06:02 AM (19 years, 9 months ago) |
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Quote:
Sitting on the couch facing my friend while he was playing guitar I closed my eyes and found that I could read my DNA and while reading it, it shoed my images, I felt like I was been giving a visual crash course in mans history. I saw ancient civilisations, danced with the druids of Ireland during their ceremonies.. as I flew through all of the information that is encoded in my DNA, I turned to my friend and said 'I am evolving, right now' . He was pretty fucked and just said sweet, but was looking at me in a weird way. I then looked at the sofa next to him where he was sitting, some voice in my brain shouted at me 'all of this, you create, all of this, you create' I understood that I created reality and started to play with it.
last october, after fasting for 24hours i ingested 5-6 grams of dry homegrown cubenis and after seeing intense visuals in my garden, such as ufo (flying saucers) in the sky shooting laser beams at the ground and the ground emitting a huge coloured glow, i needed to be alone in my bedroom. i had total sensory overload and had the lights, music off. i crawled under the sheets on my bed and went through pretty much what you described above, i didnt know whether my eyes were open or closed, and i saw one big cev/oev everywhere. i had no concept of a body and was exisiting purely as a 'soul', existing infinitely in everything. after this highly visual part of the trip i went into complete headfuck. i had no concept of normal reality, everything around me was an illusion, my friends in the house, tripping, were all there to trick me into believing i am living.
the end of my trip doesnt sound quite as intense as yours but they kind of follow a similar pattern of intense oevs/evolving/dna/then an illusion headfuck.
i didnt quite know what to make of my trip as i had very little memory of the event and people tried to speak to me but i couldnt respond and have no memory of speaking to some people. although quite hellish at the time, i look back on it as an amazing event, my best trip.
if you come to any conclusions, i'd love to hear them.
cheers. mike
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The poison is the dose - Paracelsus
Let your food be medicine and your medicine be food - Hippocrates
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mikey_
SURFING ON SINEWAVES
Registered: 08/10/02
Posts: 370
Loc: Liverpool
Last seen: 14 years, 5 months
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Re: help me figure out my trip ... PLEASE [Re: mikey_]
#1592226 - 05/30/03 06:04 AM (19 years, 9 months ago) |
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i also forgot to mention about my creating reality episode, i was having illusions of being able to pass my hands through solid objects, and when coupled with synaesthesia (sp?) it made for quite and insane time! every object in my room was covered in a purple and yellow flowing fractal pattern 
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The poison is the dose - Paracelsus
Let your food be medicine and your medicine be food - Hippocrates
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gnrm23
Carpal Tunnel
Registered: 08/29/99
Posts: 6,488
Loc: n. e. OH, USSA
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Re: help me figure out my trip ... PLEASE [Re: Asante]
#1592256 - 05/30/03 06:18 AM (19 years, 9 months ago) |
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whew...
if you are a "reading books" sort of person, there may be some tomes that can help explain some of the stuff you went through...
especially some of the psychedelic studies conducted by stanislav grof, and by robert masters & jean houston...
if you are an internet-surfing type, there may be some useful stuff at places like www.csp.org & www.psychedelic-library.org
& maybe at www.erowid.org & www.lycaeum.org & www.thefane.org
some of the awe/terror/confusion may fade with time... but, the veil, once rent, may remain open enough to, well, allow continuing glimpses into some of the chaos-flux that undergirds reality... and the patterns that we somehow impose upon it as well...
if the persistence of the vision maintains for days or weeks or longer, and if it disturbs you... there may be steps you can take, if you desire to do so... anything from diving back into the psychedelic waters (and again risk entering chapel perilous), or a slower approach to the antipodes of the mind via meditative techniques, to contacting someone equipped to deal with "spiritual crisis intervention" (again, some of grof's work focuses on this area; do a googlesearch), to professional medical/psychiatric help (grof is a shrink, but he's been thru plenty of trip sessions & has a much better handle on what the hell is/might be happening than some run-of-the-mill MD, imho...), to chemical intervention --- 'scrip drugs such as major tranx or minor tranx, or (better, imho) abram hoffer's orthomolecular psychiatry methods --- so-called "niacin therapy", in which fairly large quantitities of vitamin B3, along with other nutrients, are given to troubled people in an attempt to allow their brain chemistry to settle down to normal functioning (this may not work for everyone, but it is OTC, fairly safe, fairly inexpensive, and often surprisingly effective...)
~
~
the sultan consulted his vizier, and demanded that he construct a device which would allow the sultan to change his mood - to make him happy when he was feeling sad, and to sadden him when he was feeling happy...
the vizier went into his laboratory, and, after a night of work, returned to his king with a golden ring, upon which was the inscription: "this, too, shall pass."
~
~
let us know how you are doing, ok?
~
~
~
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old enough to know better
not old enough to care
Edited by gnrm23 (05/30/03 06:22 AM)
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Strumpling
Neuronaut
Registered: 10/11/02
Posts: 7,571
Loc: Hyperspace
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Re: help me figure out my trip ... PLEASE [Re: symantic]
#1592554 - 05/30/03 09:16 AM (19 years, 9 months ago) |
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very interesting 
Parts of it reminded me of the Matrix
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Insert an "I think" mentally in front of eveything I say that seems sketchy, because I certainly don't KNOW much. Also; feel free to yell at me.
In addition: SHPONGLE
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symantic
Stranger
Registered: 05/30/03
Posts: 27
Last seen: 14 years, 9 months
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Re: help me figure out my trip ... PLEASE [Re: Strumpling]
#1592557 - 05/30/03 09:18 AM (19 years, 9 months ago) |
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here is another part of this fucked up story. .that is taking over my life
12 of my friends have had the same trip.. they are all living in dublin.. and had the same trip as me.. at different times.. in different countries.. on different shrooms...
they recently came over for a visit.. I told them about my trip.. and they all said they had had the same experience.. exactly !!
what do you make of that
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reality is the part of the imaginatio we all agree on
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symantic
Stranger
Registered: 05/30/03
Posts: 27
Last seen: 14 years, 9 months
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Re: help me figure out my trip ... PLEASE [Re: symantic]
#1592580 - 05/30/03 09:30 AM (19 years, 9 months ago) |
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what I seen is helping me to form a philosophy
here is the jist of it let me know what you think
My philosophy to date....
reality ???
you can never see something until your brain can provide a linguistic
counterpart for it.. try imagining something that cannot be described by use
of language.. you can't.. therfore everything that you see around you is
defined by language, language constructs reality... we are held back be
language.. as we grow up.. we are immersed in it.. it therefore defines all
that we can percieve..
here's the next bit.. as we grow up.. television our parents .. everyone ..
instills in you a 'priory', this is a set of rules that your superego will
follow when allowing to interact and percieve the world around you.. example
of a priory thought ; the sky is blue.. if you woke up one day to find the
sky was red and everybody telling you it was red and that the fact you
thought it was blue is absurd.. your superego kicks in.. to enable you to
maintain a balance in your brain.. and no matter how much you think the sky
was blue and should still be.... with time.. that idea will be pushed deep
down into your subconcious.. becuase it would be dangerous for you to
entertain the concept.. you would according to your priory be crazy...
it's what freud called supression.. supression of thought's that could cause
such an overflow of bioelectrical energy that could cause physical harm..
it's your mind protecting it's machinery.. well imagine as a kid your
growing up and you just see what you see.. but then along come
people,television the system.. system being cultural or not.. giving you
your idea of what the world looks.. the big picture.. instilling a priory of
rules that you can't argue with.. you don't even know they exist
well the big picture is quite tainted.. what you see around you is not what
is really there..
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reality is the part of the imaginatio we all agree on
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Grav
Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 4,454
Last seen: 10 years, 2 months
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Re: help me figure out my trip ... PLEASE [Re: symantic]
#1592645 - 05/30/03 10:12 AM (19 years, 9 months ago) |
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once I did around 8 grams of some Oregon blues (they were potent, people were tripping balls just off 1 or 2 grams)
anyways, what followed was a period of complete beauty and bliss as everything in my apartment began to turn liquid and flow. It turned into some subterranean cavern, dark and echoey and so wild..
but I lost my shit.. began ranting to my friends about all sorts of crazy shit, ceased to believe in gravity, began throwing shit, then the trip quickly turned into hell. I was face down on the floor crying and pleading to be saved from it. Definately the scariest place i've ever been.
it fucked me up, and for a good few weeks after it, I felt so empty and so void of a soul... I was eager to trip again still and I did... I tripped a few times after that and they all felt pretty empty... I wanted to be magically healed, but I knew I was just kidding myself..
It just takes time.. patience... to get over that shit..
maybe the best thing to do when things are getting to intense is to just brush it off.. address your thoughts.. "I know you're there, and that what you're showing me is real, but I choose to stay grounded, because this is MY fuckin head here.."
i think that analyzation of shit is just one spectrum of the whole experience..
another spectrum would be the part of you that just gazes upon something beautiful and doesn't try and process anything at all... or the part of you that would participate in a pointless game, just for the sake of playing
you have to know your limits and not be eager for 'the ultimate truth' like mentioned above.. I think the ultimate truth comes with ultimate pain... too much information for the human mind.
ESPECIALLY one in this fucked up god-fearing culture...
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lucid
Jack's AlteredConsciousness
Registered: 03/29/03
Posts: 6,319
Loc: up on the bidet
Last seen: 9 years, 4 months
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Re: help me figure out my trip ... PLEASE [Re: Grav]
#1592697 - 05/30/03 10:45 AM (19 years, 9 months ago) |
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Yikes !
u guys really think "The Truth" is that scary?!
let's all live in an eternal sea of lies...
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"no-mind un-thinks no-thought..."
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Grav
Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 4,454
Last seen: 10 years, 2 months
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Re: help me figure out my trip ... PLEASE [Re: lucid]
#1592817 - 05/30/03 11:28 AM (19 years, 9 months ago) |
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yes i do think it's very intimidating
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Grav
Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 4,454
Last seen: 10 years, 2 months
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Re: help me figure out my trip ... PLEASE [Re: Grav]
#1592822 - 05/30/03 11:30 AM (19 years, 9 months ago) |
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infinity is a difficult thing to come to grips with, imo...
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 Swami
Eggshell Walker
Registered: 01/18/00
Posts: 15,413
Loc: In the hen house
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Re: help me figure out my trip ... PLEASE [Re: symantic]
#1592835 - 05/30/03 11:33 AM (19 years, 9 months ago) |
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What is there to figure out? There is no underlying truth. You mess with your neuro-chemical pathways substituting psilocybin for serotonin while memories and imagination and sensory input all get scrambled in some sort of delusional waking dream. How does one "make sense" of malfunctioning machinery?
That is like pouring Coca-Cola on your keyboard. Some letters start to skip and others repeat displaying an unusual "message" that you want decrypted.
Sorry, can't be done.
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The proof is in the pudding.
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lucid
Jack's AlteredConsciousness
Registered: 03/29/03
Posts: 6,319
Loc: up on the bidet
Last seen: 9 years, 4 months
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Re: help me figure out my trip ... PLEASE [Re: Swami]
#1592852 - 05/30/03 11:38 AM (19 years, 9 months ago) |
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>How does one "make sense" of malfunctioning machinery?
true, especially when we can't even "make sense" of a "functioning" mind...
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"no-mind un-thinks no-thought..."
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Grav
Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 4,454
Last seen: 10 years, 2 months
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Re: help me figure out my trip ... PLEASE [Re: Swami]
#1592906 - 05/30/03 11:53 AM (19 years, 9 months ago) |
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You mean to say you can't learn a shit-load about yourself when you trip?
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Swami
Eggshell Walker
Registered: 01/18/00
Posts: 15,413
Loc: In the hen house
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Re: help me figure out my trip ... PLEASE [Re: Grav]
#1592951 - 05/30/03 12:06 PM (19 years, 9 months ago) |
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You mean to say you can't learn a shit-load about yourself when you trip?
1. The tripper in question was asking others to figure out his trip via verbal description which is what I was responding to.
2. You may or may not learn anything from your trip. Truth, if it is at all revealed, is so mixed in with fantasy that it is impossible to discern the two.
What do you learn watching the carpet morph into different colors and faces?
What do you learn running down the street naked, ducking oncoming cars because you think they are dragons?
What do you learn thinking that you can walk through solid walls?
Now it may be possible to get a glimpse of how you have injured others through thoughtless words or actions or how you have been less that honest, etc., and I may concede that these could be valid insights.
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The proof is in the pudding.
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Grav
Registered: 02/06/02
Posts: 4,454
Last seen: 10 years, 2 months
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Re: help me figure out my trip ... PLEASE [Re: Swami]
#1592989 - 05/30/03 12:17 PM (19 years, 9 months ago) |
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Okay, sorry for mismatching topics there
i agree with you that there is a shitload of nonsense to wade through (even though it can be fun as hell)
but I do think the honest insights measure up to alot more than a 'glimpse'... imo, its more like they are right in front of your face speaking very directly and clearly to you.
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Anonymous
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 Re: help me figure out my trip ... PLEASE [Re: symantic]
#1593000 - 05/30/03 12:19 PM (19 years, 9 months ago) |
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Incredible thread!
5 shrooms!
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johnnyfive
Burning withCircles!
Registered: 07/02/02
Posts: 886
Loc: Hell
Last seen: 18 years, 10 months
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Re: help me figure out my trip ... PLEASE [Re: symantic]
#1593016 - 05/30/03 12:22 PM (19 years, 9 months ago) |
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LOL, I loved your trip man, thank you for posting!!!!!!
So it presented you with the blue pill or the red pill, eh? And you took the blue pill.
Most would say its all deliusions, in my opinon it (the trip) is right, its all right. I suggest listen, but you probibly won't.
I don't know if you call that a bad trip, but i would have LOVED to have a trip like that!
You create, thought creates reality, psionic manifesto.
So DNA symbolizm in the trips agian, well.. what did you expect a high? You ate of pure knowledge!
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And the gameshow host rings the buzzer (brrnnntt) oh and now you get a face full of face!
Edited by johnnyfive (06/01/03 11:38 PM)
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Adamist
ℚṲℰϟ✞ЇѺℵ ℛ∃Åʟḯ†У
Registered: 11/23/01
Posts: 10,211
Loc: Bloomington, IN
Last seen: 8 years, 26 days
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Re: help me figure out my trip ... PLEASE [Re: symantic]
#1593389 - 05/30/03 01:50 PM (19 years, 9 months ago) |
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Holy shit! Reminds me of an experience I had a long, long time ago..... Oh the memories... I especially think that gnrm23's advice would be very helpful to you, I agree with alot of what he already posted...
One thing's for sure:
You will never be the same.
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 { { { ṧ◎ηḯ¢ αʟ¢ℌ℮мƴ } } }
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