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Community > Physical and Mental Well-Being
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Breaking up with someone
    #6110138 -

I am in the process of breaking up with someone. It is tearing me up inside how much it seems they came to depend on me, they are fighting me like a cornered animal now because I basically said I do not think a relationship is possible because I am not feeling it. I fear I may have got involved with someone who is vindictive and may take some kind of revenge on me, cheered on by their harpy girlfriends no doubt. I have agreed to meet up with them tomorrow to 'talk', somehow I suspect it will descend into a fight. I suddenly came to the realization yesterday that I do not need this shit, it just makes my life someone else's business. They do not in any way make me happy, nobody can do that but me. Now I keep getting told that I took advantage, lead them on and that I knew they had intimacy issues. They have given me an ultimatum saying that I can take back what I have said and say that I am emotionally closed off because I fear rejection, then we can pretend that I did not mean what I said in the argument and maybe get married :eek:(is it me or is that bat-shit insane?). During the argument they kept saying stuff like "I know you better than you know yourself, I have spoken to three of my friends they all agree" fucking cunt. Whatever we had it felt more like I was playing to someone else's delusion of what a relationship should be, it was not honest or equal. They say now that they had been raped and were in counseling for a year, which as it was said in the heat of an argument I do not know whether to believe. But that is not my fault! I do not think it is my responsibility to look after them because some guy in the past treated them badly.

Wow I let myself go on a rant there, very self indulgent, you got any horror stories of your own, comments, advice or suggestions? Should I run them over with my car? I do not take pleasure in upsetting other people and I wanted to do it in the kindest way possible, what should I say when we meet up that they get the solid message that this ain't my cup of tea. If I do not get a chance to add to this thread after tomorrow assume I have been kidnapped or murdered.

Edited by Andy21 (09/28/06 06:28 AM)

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Re: Breaking up with someone [Re: Andy21]
    #6110151 -

Any chick who thinks they know you better than you know yourself(like thats even possible) then talks about marriage after you told them to piss off is bad news.Talking to their freinds about your relationship problems alone would get me steamed I hate that shit.I'm guessing she is going to haunt and guilt trip you,so the most important thing is to not let her talk you into anything if your not feelin it you likely never will if she can't understand you for you and respect your feelings shes poo anyway.Be firm and make it clear you'll do fine don't let her cry her way to a win either their genetically programmed to try that shit you know.

Also running them over should be last resort and only done if it can be video taped for hosting on youtube.

Good luck and dont get kidnapped.

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Re: Breaking up with someone [Re: Andy21]
    #6111575 -

You should get everybody including her friends on Breaking Up With Shannen Doherty. Let Shannen handle all those women, she can do it!

http://www.oxygen.com/specials/casting/shannen/


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Anxiety is what you make it.

Edited by LunarEclipse (09/28/06 03:58 PM)

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Re: Breaking up with someone [Re: Mr420]
    #6114869 -

I survived! Although at one point I thought I was about to get stabbed up. I layed it out basically saying I didnt feel things were going anywhere and then she said the stuff about how I lead her on. I apologized for that, she kept saying that it was just because we were both so busy, if we really tried we could have something special etc. I was firm like you said and just said, I have thought about this a lot and made up my mind. Then we just both sort of sat uncomfortably staring into space until I said that I had to be going. So I walked out of the bar leaving her sat at the table, I start making my way to the train station and then I notice that I am being followed! So I stop and ask whats up and shes like "we cant end it like this I still want to be friends" so I said "sure". I set off walking again her following me just a few feet behind and I start looking to see if shes reaching into her pocket. She follows me all the way to the train station and then I said I had to catch my train and that I would message her. I really did wonder if I was gonna get hit with the ashtray in the bar or stabbed on the street. But now it's over, no more relationships with people I meet online.

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Re: Breaking up with someone [Re: Andy21]
    #6115918 -

Good job man. Way to be mature about it.

No sarcasm at all.


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Every mistake, intentional or otherwise, in the above post, is the fault of the reader.

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Re: Breaking up with someone [Re: Penguarky Tunguin]
    #6116163 -

Thanks man, I stuttered and paused a lot in real life but I guess it is like pulling a band aid.

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Re: Breaking up with someone [Re: Andy21]
    #6116483 -

Good job, glad you made it out ok
:thumbup:


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\m/ Spanksta \m/

"do you have the freedom to do with your nervous system what you want?"

"MolokoMilkPlus said:
I'll respect you if you let me give you a blow job"

"tactik said:
respect the can."


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Re: Breaking up with someone [Re: eligal]
    #6124153 -

Maybe you should mail her that book... "He's just not that into you" so she knows better next time!
To bad I didn't read this before you had already fixed everything!
Also good to note not to get heavy into a relationship- ie sex- before you know if you even want a relationship.  To most girls (and I say most not all) sex = wanting a relationship... if you men would just come out and say... hey I just want to fuck and thats it... there would be a lot less of these episodes :wink:


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mipa

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