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ℚṲℰϟ✞ЇѺℵ ℛ∃Åʟḯ†У
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Registered: 11/24/01
Posts: 10,211
Loc: Bloomington, IN
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Inner Demons / Shadow
    #763219 - 07/20/02 09:33 PM (16 years, 4 months ago)

So I was telling my friend about the dreams I've been having lately, about how there's been a common theme of evil pervading them.

Sometimes these dreams come in the form of a snake, representing everything inside of me that I fear. Of course my natural instinct is to run from it, but I am forced into confrontation every now and then. When I face it I realize it's just an illusion to test me, and then it usually disappears.
I keep having dreams where people tell me I seem demonic or evil, and the weird thing is, I agree with them. I don't think I'm innately evil, but then again I don't think anyone thinks that they are evil inside... Could I really just be fooling myself? What is evil anyways? I don't take pleasure or joy out of the suffering or harming of others, I try to love unconditionally, I try to be as fair as possible, considering all sides of any conflict... But are these the types of things that everyone thinks about themselves? Did Hitler think he was a good person?

Is it productive to question or doubt your humanity?

:heartpump: { { { ṧ◎ηḯ¢ αʟ¢ℌ℮мƴ } } } :heartpump:

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altered statesman

Registered: 11/08/98
Posts: 2,261
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Re: Inner Demons / Shadow [Re: Adamist]
    #763378 - 07/20/02 10:21 PM (16 years, 4 months ago)

Nice post, Adamist.

"Is it productive to question or doubt your humanity?"

I confront my dark side at least once a day.
If I'm lucky.
I like to flush it out into the open so I can know "where" it is.
When I don't know, I am in trouble.

The nature and origin of evil will probably always be unclear to us in our present reality.
Does it have its own reality?
I'm unsure.
To me, true evil is WILLFULL ignorance. A shadow is a good way of thinking about it.
Evil comes from something blocking the sun ( light, wisdom, self-knowledge.)
And what is blocking the light?
Ourselves. Selfishness.
We have a secret agenda and we want it to remain hidden by hiding it from the light of awareness.
Many times we do it by hiding it from ourselves.

An example of that from my own life:
A friend who is a girl visits me after breaking up with her bf.
She gets drunk and when I go to lie down for a nap, follows me and lies down on my bed with me.
She cries and addresses me as her bf.
She hugs me and starts touching me in all the right/wrong places.
I don't do it with her although my body strongly urges me to.
She is lying to herself about who I am so she can escape responsiblity for her act.
It is probably a 1 on the evil scale, but to me that's what it is.

I AM what Willis was talkin' bout.

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Criminal Bodhisattva
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Registered: 07/07/02
Posts: 3,289
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Re: Inner Demons / Shadow [Re: Adamist]
    #763383 - 07/20/02 10:23 PM (16 years, 4 months ago)

Concerning being innately evil :
I don't believe anyone, not even the all famous Hitler, is/was innately evil. When your born, you are born into innocence. The world around you influences you, corrupts you, taints you. A child doesnt know how to lie when hes born, but he soon learns. I've even heard that people who have "down syndrome" cant lie, because they dont know how. (whether this is true or not....) This relates back to the Garden of Eden story where at first they were innocent, but then they ate from the forbidden fruit and attained knowledge.

What is evil?:
Dictionary.com says :
Morally bad or wrong; wicked: an evil tyrant.
Causing ruin, injury, or pain; harmful: the evil effects of a poor diet.
Characterized by or indicating future misfortune; ominous: evil omens.
Bad or blameworthy by report; infamous: an evil reputation.
Characterized by anger or spite; malicious: an evil temper.

But go by my rule of thumb. As long as you have some human compassion...some shred of human decency, then you cant be all that evil.

But are these the types of things that everyone thinks about themselves?
Everyone has inner deamons, but not everyone realizes them. Its when you realize them, that you are one step closer to eliminating them. Or even becoming one with them, balancing them, neutralizing them. The ying and the yang. The good and the evil. The light and the dark.

Is it productive to question or doubt your humanity?
I think its productive to question anything and everything. Asking questions soon leads you to answers. Or a mind fool of questions.

T h e r e  a r e  n o  o r d i n a r y  m o m e n t s.

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