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Unhappiness and self-absorbed tendencies
    #4429379 -

unhappiness is caused by dwelling on the self. Happiness is outward, more encompassing, and somewhat beyond yourself. Unhappiness is a by-product of self-absorbed reality.

You arent special. You dont matter. Get over it, and live life or dont.

**a message brought to you by a certified heartless asshole**

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Re: Unhappiness and self-absorbed tendencies [Re: SneezingPenis]
    #4429415 -

Quote:
*(Well then Fido got up off the floor, and he rolled over
and he looked me straight in the eye
And you know what he said?
"Once upon a time, somebody say to me"
This is the dog talkin' now
"What is your, conceptual, continuity?"
"Well I told 'em right then", Fido said
"It should be easy to see
"The crux of the biscuit
is the apostrophe"
Well you know, the man that was talking to the dog
looked at the dog, and he said
Sort of staring in disbelief
"You can't say that"
he said
"It doesn't, and you can't, I won't, and it don't
it hasn't, it isn't, it even ain't, and it shouldn't
it couldn't"
He told him, "No, no, no"
I told him, "Yes, yes, yes"
I said, "I do it all the time

Zappa :wink:

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Re: Unhappiness and self-absorbed tendencies [Re: falcon]
    #4430204 -

Quote:
You arent special. You dont matter. Get over it, and live life or dont.

**a message brought to you by a certified heartless asshole**


i gotta admit i'm heartless with myself from time to time. i usually end up feeling like i've deeply hurt myself by neglecting my wants and needs. and this realization makes me feel very sorry for myself.


--------------------
"consensus on the nature of equilibrium is usually established by periodic conflict." -henry kissinger

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Re: Unhappiness and self-absorbed tendencies [Re: crunchytoast]
    #4433033 -

>> i usually end up feeling like i've deeply hurt myself by neglecting my wants and needs.

Is the mind which feels hurt the same as the mind of unconcern for your desires? What is it that has caused you pain: the mind of unconcern for your desires, or the mind frustrated by their unfulfilment? Considering that there are always desires to go unfulfilled, and that fulfillment of desire is always temporary, ask: which mind serves you better?


--------------------


:poison: Dark Triangles - New Psychedelic Techno Single - Listen on Soundcloud :poison:
Gyroscope full album available SoundCloud or MySpace

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Re: Unhappiness and self-absorbed tendencies [Re: Ped]
    #4433144 -

thanks for reviving this thread, i thought it was going to die a quick death...

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Re: Unhappiness and self-absorbed tendencies [Re: Ped]
    #4435034 -

Quote:
Is the mind which feels hurt the same as the mind of unconcern for your desires? What is it that has caused you pain: the mind of unconcern for your desires, or the mind frustrated by their unfulfilment? Considering that there are always desires to go unfulfilled, and that fulfillment of desire is always temporary, ask: which mind serves you better?


if i'm hungry, why dont i eat? sure the satisfaction of a good meal will be temporary. sure there's other things i'm dissatisfied about. but wont eating temporarily satisfy the desire to eat?

i would say that its the frustration of the desires, not the mind itself that causes dissatisfaction. if i have 'hungry mind' and i eat, that's satisfaction. if i have hungry mind and i dont eat, that's dissatisfaction. like satisfaction/dissatisfaction is something like the product of desire X environment. not innate to desire.

IOW its not the desire, but the way the desire interacts with the world that causes frustration.

what do you think? did i at least address what you were saying?


--------------------
"consensus on the nature of equilibrium is usually established by periodic conflict." -henry kissinger

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Re: Unhappiness and self-absorbed tendencies [Re: crunchytoast]
    #4435137 -

IOW its not the desire, but the way the desire interacts with the world that causes frustration.
__________________________________________________

Since all desires cannot be fulfilled at least in the moment, it seems to me that attachment to fulfillment is what causes unhappiness. As in the difference between preference and addiction. If I only prefer that some desire be fulfilled, I don't have to suffer if I can't get it. If I have to have it fulfilled (addiction), I will suffer if it is not fulfilled.

So consider that it is not the way the desire interacts with the world, but the way you interact with the desire.


--------------------
"Don't believe everything you think". -Anom.

" All that lives was born to die"-Anom.

With much wisdom comes much sorrow,
The more knowledge, the more grief.
Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC

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Re: Unhappiness and self-absorbed tendencies [Re: Icelander]
    #4435192 -

i've been wondering about this attitude lately. gotta admit i usually share it.

but what if happiness isn't so great?
i mean, happiness is great, but is it great all the time? do i have to be happy? why should i have to be happy?
maybe i have these sads parts to myself, you know? these parts that suffer or hurt. maybe theyre there and theyre there for a reason.

maybe being happy all the time isn't such a good thing?


--------------------
"consensus on the nature of equilibrium is usually established by periodic conflict." -henry kissinger

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Re: Unhappiness and self-absorbed tendencies [Re: crunchytoast]
    #4435293 -

Being happy isn't something one should or shouldn't be., don't you think?  Sometimes being sad is the best way to be, because it is true. Emotions are flowing when healthy. Just watch a little child. When they are hurt or angry they just let it all out. "All out" is the key. Then when that energy is released they move or flow to the natural next thing. Which often is wonder and joy. I believe as adults we have lost this skill of completely releasing /experiencing our emotions and so stay stuck and cannot move or flow.  Children before they are trained, seem to rest in joy most of the time. Why shouldn't that be our natural state?

All emotions are healthy IMO if experienced completely. I an not saying they need to be acted on, but felt. What do you think? :heart:


--------------------
"Don't believe everything you think". -Anom.

" All that lives was born to die"-Anom.

With much wisdom comes much sorrow,
The more knowledge, the more grief.
Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC

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Re: Unhappiness and self-absorbed tendencies [Re: Icelander]
    #4435378 -

:grin: yeah that makes a lot of sense
honestly i repress my feelings in many ways all the time
instead of diving in i think i'm getting my feet wet, now ankles then knees

i guess when you're talking about preference before addiction, you're making a subtle distinction.  like, sure nothing's perfect, but is it good enough?

and when you say you relate to your desire, i say, your desire relates to reality in different ways.  and we're talking about the same thing.  like, if my desire is ONLY to have this person in my life, that's addiction; but i can also redirect the same need at a different person or persons.

it's we're talking about this almost existential happiness.  it provides relief; it's there if you need it.

?


--------------------
"consensus on the nature of equilibrium is usually established by periodic conflict." -henry kissinger

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