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tak
geo's henchman
Registered: 11/20/00
Posts: 3,776
Loc: nowhereland
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My sex life
#4427488 - 07/20/05 09:18 AM (18 years, 8 months ago) |
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I have been with my girlfriend for 18 months, and it seems my sex life is dying, not because of her, but because of me. I think that she thinks its her, even though i try to reassure her that im just not a very sexual person. I dont want her to be unsatisfied, but usually when she wants sex i am either too tired or not in the mood. I dont want to leave her unsatisfied, but sometimes i really just dont want to.
I dunno wtf is wrong with me.
-------------------- The DJ's took pills to stay awake and play for seven days.
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UlisSausage7
seattle
Registered: 02/19/05
Posts: 466
Last seen: 16 years, 9 months
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Re: My sex life [Re: tak]
#4427528 - 07/20/05 09:34 AM (18 years, 8 months ago) |
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well i dont think sex should be the center of a relationship, but should be a main part. As long as you know you guys were/are having sex for the right reasons (love and pleasuring eachother) and not just trying to get laid,.
I went off topic a bit, but anyways, about the problem. you could try maybe somehing new in the sack . Also, viagra will probably get you going, or try something like feeding her chocolote i dunno, im a virgin. Or you could watch a porno together (if your both up for it) because i gurantee that will get you in the mood
-------------------- Marx said: good luck with the microscopy
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The_Hobbit
Bilbo Baggins
Registered: 04/06/04
Posts: 1,382
Loc: The Shire
Last seen: 17 years, 22 days
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Re: My sex life [Re: tak]
#4427551 - 07/20/05 09:38 AM (18 years, 8 months ago) |
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I can imagine that. I'm a virgin, but there are times when I'm just too tired or not in the mood to whack off.
I think the solution is 2 part.
First, get in touch with your body and get things going. Exercise is good for this. There are days when I do nothing and I have much less energy than days when I get up and get myself going somehow. There's nothing like the feeling of a good run or a good workout. It gets your testosterone levels up and makes you feel alive.
Second, excite yourself. Like I said, I've never had sex, but I figure that I have an inherent understanding considering that I've interacted with girls. =) Good intentions lead to good emotions lead to good mood leads to more good emotions. It's always best to start off calmly and slowly. Work from there.
-------------------- Smoking my hobbit leaf... Please keep in mind that I am just a human being. Please read my posts carefully and interpret their meaning for yourself.
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery
Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
Loc: underbelly
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Re: My sex life [Re: tak]
#4427562 - 07/20/05 09:41 AM (18 years, 8 months ago) |
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Sometimes the desire to be physically/emotionally close is a reason for wanting sex. Try some intimate sensual touching and cuddling and sharing your heart feelings. This may be just what is wanted and enough.
However you feel about your sexual needs. There is nothing "wrong with you".
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: My sex life [Re: tak]
#4427673 - 07/20/05 10:20 AM (18 years, 8 months ago) |
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Quote:
root-ninja-tak said: I have been with my girlfriend for 18 months, and it seems my sex life is dying, not because of her, but because of me. I think that she thinks its her, even though i try to reassure her that im just not a very sexual person. I dont want her to be unsatisfied, but usually when she wants sex i am either too tired or not in the mood. I dont want to leave her unsatisfied, but sometimes i really just dont want to.
Send her over my way. I'll make sure that she is taken care of while you work out any issues you might have.
But seriously, I go through low sex drive times myself. There have been times where I barely thought about sex for three months. But, my libido always comes raging back and I turn into a nympho for a few months.
Do whatever you feel like whenever you feel like it. If you aren't in a sex mood, then don't have sex.
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Fucknuckle
Dog Lover
Registered: 04/24/04
Posts: 6,762
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After many years of marraige and sex with the same person. I have a suggestion.
When our sexlife gets in a rut we stop all sexual contact for 2 weeks or longer. Then when the decided time comes we can not wait to tear it up.
Second........ Loveing each other is a matter of sacifice and understanding. There are many times I am too tired to do it. But she really wants it.. So I give it to her good. It is no different from work. hear me out.
When I have worked a 10 hour day and my boss asks me to say a couple more hours. I do it out of respect for the boss and because my resposbilites to the relationship require it.
Now I didn't really want to compare a boss to a girlfriend but the point is. Love requires duty and respect. Combined with a real need to place others before yourself.
Anyway good luck and get to it.......:)
-------------------- What it is, is what it is my Brother. It is as it is, so suffer thru it.
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Society
Mmmm... pizza
Registered: 07/03/04
Posts: 14,303
Loc:
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I agree with someone up there. Sex does NOT need to be part of a relationship. You and her should do what icelander said when you're not in the mood- just cuddle and kiss.
-------------------- Delicious Pizza
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mntlfngrs
The Art of Casterbation
Registered: 07/18/02
Posts: 3,937
Last seen: 5 years, 6 months
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Re: My sex life [Re: tak]
#4439143 - 07/22/05 05:03 PM (18 years, 8 months ago) |
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You sound like my wife!
Maybe if she sucks on it a little first? try usingf porn if it doesn't bother her. find out what is making you tired and fix that. It will probably help a lot.
-------------------- Be all and you'll be to end all
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subterranean_
Wolf at thedoor...
Registered: 06/25/05
Posts: 52
Loc: Lakeland, Florida
Last seen: 18 years, 4 months
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Re: My sex life [Re: mntlfngrs]
#4440092 - 07/22/05 08:54 PM (18 years, 8 months ago) |
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Try something diffrent (positions, places, porn, toys, dirty talk, ect.) You can allways buy her some lingerie. Tell her exactly how you feel though. Women are smart when it comes to this so be real honest when you tell her something.
If none of that gives you a boost then i would think its a mental or physical problem you need to work out with a doctor.
gl bud
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henry21
Stranger
Registered: 06/11/05
Posts: 29
Last seen: 16 years, 10 months
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well..there's simply no logic to go for it even if you are too tired or not feeling like having it coz even if you still do that, then neither of you will be able to enjoy. Why don't you do that on your holidays..better take a leave from work..and go with your gf for a holiday and see how spicy your sex life can become..If even there, you don't find any interest then the problem is really with you and your gf won't be your side for long...
-------------------- Try diflucan for fungal infections
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nightkrawler
explorer
Registered: 06/18/04
Posts: 2,980
Loc: new england
Last seen: 5 years, 8 months
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Re: My sex life [Re: henry21]
#4444101 - 07/23/05 06:24 PM (18 years, 8 months ago) |
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it happens. after you start going out with someone for awhile and having sex with them regularly, it becomes kind of routine.
-------------------- Not all who wander are lost - J.R.R. Tolkien
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Nemo_Hoes
Juan Sánchez Villa-Lobo Ramírez
Registered: 09/16/04
Posts: 39,721
Loc: Ray Ray's Mystery Garage
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Re: My sex life [Re: tak]
#4444920 - 07/23/05 10:13 PM (18 years, 8 months ago) |
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You should get wang pills, and E.
-------------------- We will also report to the NAACP and to Al Sharpton's entourage, how the Shroomery administrators allows their mods and members to be balatantly allowed the use of the 'N' word.
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Society
Mmmm... pizza
Registered: 07/03/04
Posts: 14,303
Loc:
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Re: My sex life [Re: Nemo_Hoes]
#4448086 - 07/24/05 07:23 PM (18 years, 8 months ago) |
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There's always a problem with posting topics about sexual health on this forum- people lack the seriousness and compassion to help with good answers.
Wang pills and E? Why should he risk his health?
-------------------- Delicious Pizza
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Nemo_Hoes
Juan Sánchez Villa-Lobo Ramírez
Registered: 09/16/04
Posts: 39,721
Loc: Ray Ray's Mystery Garage
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Re: My sex life [Re: Society]
#4448855 - 07/24/05 10:52 PM (18 years, 8 months ago) |
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Why wouldn't he.
-------------------- We will also report to the NAACP and to Al Sharpton's entourage, how the Shroomery administrators allows their mods and members to be balatantly allowed the use of the 'N' word.
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Shroomism
Space Travellin
Registered: 02/13/00
Posts: 66,015
Loc: 9th Dimension
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Re: My sex life [Re: tak]
#4448917 - 07/24/05 11:11 PM (18 years, 8 months ago) |
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Eat more fruit, drink more water.
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Irradiated_Feces
doomedgeneration
Registered: 07/11/03
Posts: 4,278
Loc: Great White North
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Re: My sex life [Re: tak]
#4450362 - 07/25/05 12:01 PM (18 years, 8 months ago) |
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Buy her a vibrator. Eat her out. Get your mojo back in action or she will eventually find satisfaction elsewhere.
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Society
Mmmm... pizza
Registered: 07/03/04
Posts: 14,303
Loc:
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If your relationship with your year and half girlfriend is so fragile that she'll "find satisfaction elsewhere" because you don't have sex often, then that's an unhealthy relationship.
How about some thoughtful, constructive advice?
-------------------- Delicious Pizza
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Irradiated_Feces
doomedgeneration
Registered: 07/11/03
Posts: 4,278
Loc: Great White North
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Re: My sex life [Re: Society]
#4464815 - 07/28/05 02:00 PM (18 years, 8 months ago) |
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A year and a half isn't that long. If the girl wants sex and the guy does nothing about it, all the power to her to go out and get it elsewhere. Sex drives need to be compatible for a relationship to work, or there has to be some sort of compromise or understanding. Thoughtfulness is exactly what is needed here. Him thinking of her need for sex. It's unfair to leave her hanging like that because you're just "not a sexual person". I thought my advice was pretty thoughtful and constructive, thanks.
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drtyfrnk
PresidentialCandidate 2008
Registered: 01/24/05
Posts: 2,961
Loc: Ontario, Canada
Last seen: 14 years, 5 months
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It was irradiated, it was.
At least IMHO it was. The girl will go to get sex somewhere else if sex is not readily available from her man.
-------------------- It's Krang, Bitch!
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Icelander
The Minstrel in the Gallery
Registered: 03/15/05
Posts: 95,368
Loc: underbelly
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I agree, thoughfull advice for sure.
-------------------- "Don't believe everything you think". -Anom. " All that lives was born to die"-Anom. With much wisdom comes much sorrow, The more knowledge, the more grief. Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC
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