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Shop: Myyco.com Golden Teacher Liquid Culture For Sale   Unfolding Nature Unfolding Nature: Being in the Implicate Order

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Re: If you have low self-confidence, where does it stem from? [Re: swm]
    #3814485 -

Yeah, I'm getting to the point where I am able not to listen to the nagging little voice in my head telling me I'm not good enough...it's definately a part of me. I think that maybe everyone has a voice like that, but some of us have maybe begun to believe it somehow. I don't know, just a thought.

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Re: If you have low self-confidence, where does it stem from? [Re: MOTH]
    #3814609 -

I agree,I just think I come off harsh and cold hearted sometimes.I try to give my opinion and sometimes it is taken wrong.I get that nagging little self conscious voice sometimes and I ignore it or try to at least.
At some point you just become numb and can't interact with people properly,or maybe it's just me.


--------------------
I can't spell and I have poor grammar.The crap I just posted is proof enough.

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Re: If you have low self-confidence, where does it stem from? [Re: Locus]
    #3814968 -

Locus said:
You have no idea what you're talking about.. :rolleyes:


he's a noob, why would he?

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Re: If you have low self-confidence, where does it stem from? [Re: WiserGod]
    #3814980 -

im gonna tell you the same thing my mother told me:
"GET THE FUCK OUTTA HERE"

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Re: If you have low self-confidence, where does it stem from? [Re: DF2K]
    #3815900 -

DF2K said:
Locus said:
You have no idea what you're talking about.. :rolleyes:


he's a noob, why would he?


yeah, i know.. thanks.. i just couldn't help getting pissed off though.


--------------------

The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existing. One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure of reality. It is enough if one tries merely to comprehend a little of this mystery every day. Never lose a holy curiosity. ~ Albert Einstein
"Fear is the great barrier to human growth." ~ Dr. Robert Monroe



~~~*Dosis sola facit venenum*~~~

*Check my profile to listen to my music* :smile:

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Re: If you have low self-confidence, where does it stem from? [Re: MOTH]
    #3823053 -

From your surroundings. Take my oldest for example, she is smart, gorgeous, an excellent volleyball, and a decent basketball player. She thinks she's ugly, won't get accepted to the college of her choice and sucks at volleyball and basketball. (all teen-agers do that) Ripple and I have always told her what a great kid she is. We've always told her she is pretty and smart. In grammar school she was a good basketball player. What happened? Her high school coach thought she was going get taller. She didn't. So she's on the bench alot. Yet each time she plays she scores! In grammar school her volleyball coach didn't have the time of day for her, her high school volleyball coach only sees one player and has blinders on. She plays "club" volleyball and her coach there is amazed at her low self-esteem on the court.
What do I blame it on? Her best friend. This girl is conceited and believes the world revolves around her. My daughter does have other friends who do build up her self esteem but she doesn't hang out with them enough to make up for the damage her "best" friend has done.

Understand what I'm saying or did I just ramble on?


--------------------
Just a little nervous from the fall.

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Re: If you have low self-confidence, where does it stem from? [Re: chinadoll]
    #3823494 -

Well, speaking personally, I'd say being bullied throughout school is the main reason for my lack of self-esteem. This is not the same thing as blaming others; I realise now that I probably didn't respond the way I should/could have done to minimise the harm. If I'd known then what I know now maybe it wouldn't have been such a big deal, but the fact is those experiences did cause problems which persist to this day. I'm learning how to deal with this shit all the time but it's hard to change ideas that have been burned so deeply into one's subconscious.

Dan

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Re: If you have low self-confidence, where does it stem from? [Re: chupucabras]
    #3825878 -

I have had the same problems as you guys! Low self-esteem and confidence, for the same reasons. Parents that are very critical typically have children that are very critical of themsevles, as well as others. There is something you can do it about!

The feeling of low self-esteem is a blockage of your normal, instinctual brain patterns. It is your nature to be at ease, confident, and happy all the time. The key is removing the obstacles. This does not mean you have to sit on a couch and talk about your childhood etc. You simply need a different type of brain excercise that you are probably not used to.

You guys should look into neuro/biofeedback, or try to find a local hypnotist. They can help you even out your physiology<sic>. Basically what happens is you learn to excersize different frequencies of brain activity that you don't normaly use. I have a custom hypnosis CD from a professional hypnotist that I listen to every morning. It has turned my life and career around in the direction I WANT it to go in.

If you go through life believing, and expecting to have trouble, you will indeed find trouble. All you have to do is change your current belief system(not too hard with practice) to something more usefull.

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Re: If you have low self-confidence, where does it stem from? [Re: BillyGrass]
    #3850853 -

I am only 18 and i am hating my life already. I know i am lacking self confidence and I'm not sure how to better myself. It stemed from when i started at high school and i was hated by, i would say most of my year, well that's how it felt at least. a lot of the people in my year called me spam, don't ask me why its a long story. I had people really kick the crap out of me on some days. even though that has all stopped now, it has scared me and now i just feel that people don't want me to be there and I'm probably wrong, i just find it really hard to talk to people and I can never really start conversations.

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Re: If you have low self-confidence, where does it stem from? [Re: lindex]
    #3851382 -

Hey, that sounds really familiar.  :hug: 

This sounds kind of funny, but one thing has has been invaluable towards helping my confidence in conversations, is making eye-contact with the people I am talking to.  I stare them right in the eye and suddenly I find I am not so nervous or frightened, and the words come easier.  I don't know why this is, but it has been helping me a lot.  It took awhile to work up the courage to make eye-contact at first, but now I use it all the time.  And most people seem to respond very positively to eye-contact, which is interesting. 

Also I've noticed that just by making eye contact with someone, I don't even need to talk as much.  It sort of says to the other person, "I am interested in what you have to say," and many times they will initiate a conversation first.  I have become a better listener as well by making eye-contact. 

So it seems to me that in matters of social confidence, eye-contact = k3y.

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