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otoroko
EsotericIllumination
Registered: 03/30/05
Posts: 61
Last seen: 17 years, 14 days
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Re: My advice on how to speak to people [Re: freddurgan]
#4087437 - 04/23/05 02:03 AM (18 years, 10 months ago) |
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My biggest breaktrough was realising how little what is actually said matters. It's scary how much you can tell about people simply by looking at them (while talking).
-------------------- when you're watching television the higher brain regions (like the midbrain and the neo-cortex) are shut down, and most activity shifts to the lower brain regions (like the limbic system). The right hemisphere is twice as active as the left, a neurological anomaly. The crossover from left to right releases a surge of the body?s natural opiates: endorphins, which include beta-endorphins and enkephalins. Endorphins are structurally identical to opium and its derivatives (morphine, codeine, heroin, etc.).After just 30 seconds of watching television the brain begins to produce alpha waves, which indicates torpid (almost comatose) rates of activity.
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Amber_Glow
Sat Chit Anand
Registered: 09/02/02
Posts: 1,543
Last seen: 11 years, 20 days
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Re: My advice on how to speak to people [Re: The_Hobbit]
#4091524 - 04/24/05 12:33 PM (18 years, 10 months ago) |
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I'm also pretty socially inept and will be putting your advice into practice I hope. I have been working for about 6+ months at a coffee shop now dealing with customers a lot, and that has gotten me a bit more adjusted to small talk and interacting with people, but I still have a ways to go. Thanks!
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Disco Cat
iS A PoiNdexteR
Registered: 09/15/00
Posts: 2,601
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Re: My advice on how to speak to people [Re: Amber_Glow]
#4100035 - 04/26/05 06:04 PM (18 years, 10 months ago) |
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It's awesome to see such a positive & encouraging thread, thanks!
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grphish
the Modern dayPacman
Registered: 04/01/02
Posts: 1,687
Last seen: 9 years, 3 months
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Re: My advice on how to speak to people [Re: Disco Cat]
#4101836 - 04/27/05 05:23 AM (18 years, 10 months ago) |
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a good example of a socially incapable person becoming social and stree-smart is fight club
-------------------- BoUnCy BaLL IS All SoUrCe OF LIGhT AnD HaPPiNeSS!!~! *bEEP* *beEP*
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Muppet69_420
Speed feeder
Registered: 03/23/05
Posts: 2,592
Last seen: 14 years, 7 months
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Re: My advice on how to speak to people [Re: grphish]
#6892096 - 05/09/07 02:27 AM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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the awesome smiley: !
Sorry I have no speculation posted. I'll add when there's something to add IME. Likely to happen using all the wonderfully positive ideas, expressed here it really makes savoring this thread a must. Documenting all this into file giving reference whenever.
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Quote:
I live to learn and learn to live. forget w/e was here b4 it was meth gibberish.... ....thats as old as my account... On that note fart in public and grin. Hail Shroomery!
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eligal
Noobie
Registered: 05/25/05
Posts: 7,021
Loc: California
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Re: My advice on how to speak to people [Re: The_Hobbit]
#6892128 - 05/09/07 02:42 AM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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Good advice man. The part about speaking up I think is very important I think. I used to be very soft spoken and people always misunderstood me. About half a year ago, for some reason, I started to talk a little differently, and its like I can feel my voice coming from deep in my chest and then I feel it in my throat. It felt wierd at first but now everyone can hear me perfectly and people say I sound more confident. It also made my voice ever so slightly deeper, which Im told is good with the chicks but I havent seen any difference...
Im still not good at socializing though, so lets keep this thread going and lets see if anyone else has some more good advice.
Quote:
Sammy said: Better to keep your mouth shut and look like an idiot, than open it and remove all doubt.
I used to think like this for years. End result is I have no idea how to communicate with people I dont know and can never get through one of those get-to-know-you talks. Lets say that it resulted in me barely having friends and I have no idea how to network for future jobs....
-------------------- \m/ Spanksta \m/ "do you have the freedom to do with your nervous system what you want?" "MolokoMilkPlus said: I'll respect you if you let me give you a blow job" "tactik said: respect the can."
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Muppet69_420
Speed feeder
Registered: 03/23/05
Posts: 2,592
Last seen: 14 years, 7 months
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Re: My advice on how to speak to people [Re: eligal]
#6892172 - 05/09/07 03:02 AM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
eligal said: Good advice man. The part about speaking up I think is very important I think. I used to be very soft spoken and people always misunderstood me. About half a year ago, for some reason, I started to talk a little differently, and its like I can feel my voice coming from deep in my chest and then I feel it in my throat. It felt weird at first but now everyone can hear me perfectly and people say I sound more confident. It also made my voice ever so slightly deeper, which I'm told is good with the chicks but I havent seen any difference...
Isn't this deep voice description a bit misleading?
So this voice method is felt from the chest? What? Saying it this way, "exercise towards the vocal chords through practice of using a deeper voice seem flawed? What is the sensation when doing this so you know it's working?
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Quote:
I live to learn and learn to live. forget w/e was here b4 it was meth gibberish.... ....thats as old as my account... On that note fart in public and grin. Hail Shroomery!
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eligal
Noobie
Registered: 05/25/05
Posts: 7,021
Loc: California
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Re: My advice on how to speak to people [Re: Muppet69_420]
#6896127 - 05/10/07 12:56 AM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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Im not sayin you should try to talk deeper, and Im not saying I have a voice exercise. Im saying there is "something" I do, which I guess I cant explain, which amplifies my voice (just a little) and has the side effect of sounding ever-so-slightly deeper (no my voice doesnt become the hulk).
And I know its working because people actually understand what Im saying without having to ask me to repeat myself...
-------------------- \m/ Spanksta \m/ "do you have the freedom to do with your nervous system what you want?" "MolokoMilkPlus said: I'll respect you if you let me give you a blow job" "tactik said: respect the can."
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kotik
fuckingsuperhero
Registered: 06/29/04
Posts: 3,531
Last seen: 4 years, 2 months
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Re: My advice on how to speak to people [Re: eligal]
#6896609 - 05/10/07 05:58 AM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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you forgot a big one - hygiene. you can breathe slow all you want, but you better have fresh breath if breathing out your mouth.
you can have great posture, but you also ought to have a haircut and not smell.
-------------------- No statements made in any post or message by myself should be construed to mean that I am now, or have ever been, participating in or considering participation in any activities in violation of any local, state, or federal laws. All posts are works of fiction.
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michael_lifshitz
Student
Registered: 12/27/05
Posts: 436
Loc: here
Last seen: 16 years, 2 months
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Re: My advice on how to speak to people [Re: kotik]
#6896777 - 05/10/07 07:30 AM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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This is just what I needed.
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Muppet69_420
Speed feeder
Registered: 03/23/05
Posts: 2,592
Last seen: 14 years, 7 months
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Re: My advice on how to speak to people [Re: eligal]
#6899273 - 05/10/07 08:32 PM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
eligal said: Im not sayin you should try to talk deeper, and Im not saying I have a voice exercise. Im saying there is "something" I do, which I guess I cant explain, which amplifies my voice (just a little) and has the side effect of sounding ever-so-slightly deeper (no my voice doesnt become the hulk).
And I know its working because people actually understand what Im saying without having to ask me to repeat myself...
Leaves even more questions...
--------------------
Quote:
I live to learn and learn to live. forget w/e was here b4 it was meth gibberish.... ....thats as old as my account... On that note fart in public and grin. Hail Shroomery!
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Tangerines
Registered: 04/17/05
Posts: 17,918
Loc: woodwork
Last seen: 4 years, 2 months
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Re: My advice on how to speak to people [Re: Muppet69_420]
#6899419 - 05/10/07 09:02 PM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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seems effortless for some people but alot of effort for others to talk. It is a lot of effort for usually. Except this girl i just met...anyways being yourself is the most important thing. Don't try to impress people. I need to work on this myself.
At big colleges there are so many people and the majority of them are fine but just really shallow so I end up having to force myself to talk with them and make conversation.
I just need to find those people like me. Which is proving hard to do.
Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind. ~Dr. Seuss
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Newbie
User of semicolons.
Registered: 07/18/04
Posts: 24,713
Loc: SoCal
Last seen: 10 hours, 25 minutes
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Re: My advice on how to speak to people [Re: The_Hobbit]
#6899838 - 05/10/07 10:36 PM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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Great post man
I forget where I heard it but someone once said a conversation is like a dance. You both have to take the right steps for it to flow right. It just takes practice!
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Epigallo
Stranger
Registered: 09/17/06
Posts: 8,155
Last seen: 7 years, 22 days
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Re: My advice on how to speak to people [Re: The_Hobbit]
#6904780 - 05/12/07 01:08 AM (16 years, 10 months ago) |
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I'm glad you brought it up. I think I tend to not notice how much I suck at talking. I thought I did awesome on this one presentation and then my prof told me my voice projection was bad...its embarrassing.
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