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OfflineXUL
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Social Anxiety from HELL
    #4296780 - 06/14/05 08:55 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

.


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TRUMP 2020

Edited by XUL (10/02/12 09:46 AM)

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InvisibleRandalFlagg
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: XUL]
    #4296840 - 06/14/05 09:07 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

XUL said:
okay, so I am sure I have a very severe case of social anxiety.





I have it too sometimes.  It sometimes feels like everybody is scrutinizing me when I am in a super crowded area.

Quote:

XUL said:
Well, I was sitting and eating alone, and I make eye contact with this really fuckin hot girl, and this is always when I fuckin freak. First I get locked into their eyes and I feel frozen and my eyes buldge really wide, then I (Automaticly) turn my head, but I have a muscle spasm or something in my neck and I shake like crazy. I tried to play it off, but I fuckin spazed out like a spastic idiot.





Haha...way to look like a freak.  :lol:  Don't worry...I have "girl-looking mishaps" too.


Quote:

XUL said:
How can I fix this, or can I?
:sad:




Welcome to the world of being a weird dork (Prime Minister: RandalFlagg).  I suggest alcohol because it makes you not give a shit about stuff.

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InvisibleBi0TeK
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: XUL]
    #4296848 - 06/14/05 09:08 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

does this only happen around girls?  :smirk:

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PROMOTE BACTERIA. THEY'RE THE ONLY CULTURE SOME PEOPLE HAVE.

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OfflineXUL
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: Bi0TeK]
    #4296856 - 06/14/05 09:10 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

its more severe with girls, but it also happens with doods depending who they are.

I have no problem with teachers or facutly, just students, peers, u know


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TRUMP 2020

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Offlinebelomor123
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: XUL]
    #4296867 - 06/14/05 09:16 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

hehe is ok dude, i used to be sorta like that...well w/o spasm but i know wut u talking about. It IS best to not give a shit about them, but u gotta kickstart this...a few shots of vodka or a good spliff should keep you so busy enjoying urself that the last thing u'd actually care is how you seem to other ppl...make sure u dont become an addict tho :wink:

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InvisibleRandalFlagg
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: XUL]
    #4296870 - 06/14/05 09:16 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

XUL said:
its more severe with girls, but it also happens with doods depending who they are.

I have no problem with teachers or facutly, just students, peers, u know




Maybe PA has something in the water that makes people weird (I saw you say that you are from PA and I am from PA as well).

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InvisibleBi0TeK
elephant man

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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: XUL]
    #4296885 - 06/14/05 09:21 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

in that case, I do suffer from it a bit too.

as randal said, alcohol helps

just out of interest, what drugs do you partake in?

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PROMOTE BACTERIA. THEY'RE THE ONLY CULTURE SOME PEOPLE HAVE.

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OfflineXUL
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: Bi0TeK]
    #4296900 - 06/14/05 09:24 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

marijuana alot, done lsa before, lookin to try some shrooms some day


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TRUMP 2020

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OfflineXUL
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: RandalFlagg]
    #4296907 - 06/14/05 09:25 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

Maybe PA has something in the water that makes people weird (I saw you say that you are from PA and I am from PA as well).





where u from in pa?


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TRUMP 2020

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InvisibleBi0TeK
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: XUL]
    #4296914 - 06/14/05 09:27 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

XUL said:
marijuana alot




try cutting that stuff out of your life for a while and see if you notice a difference.

I know I did.

--------------------



--------------------
PROMOTE BACTERIA. THEY'RE THE ONLY CULTURE SOME PEOPLE HAVE.

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InvisibleRandalFlagg
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: XUL]
    #4296918 - 06/14/05 09:28 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

XUL said:
Quote:

Maybe PA has something in the water that makes people weird (I saw you say that you are from PA and I am from PA as well).





where u from in pa?




Northwest side yo yo nigga.

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InvisibleIcelander
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: XUL]
    #4296921 - 06/14/05 09:29 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

IMO since you asked. Your problem really isn't social anxiety. The problem is you don't love yourself unconditionally exactally the way you are. That is where love lives. :heart: :mushroom2:


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"Don't believe everything you think". -Anom.

" All that lives was born to die"-Anom.

With much wisdom comes much sorrow,
The more knowledge, the more grief.
Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC

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OfflineXUL
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: Bi0TeK]
    #4296937 - 06/14/05 09:33 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

try cutting that stuff out of your life for a while and see if you notice a difference.

I know I did.




I think I know wat u mean man, Cuz I think I was more confident here for a while in the summer cuz I hadnt been smoking, then I got an eigth of hydro and I been smokin like nuts, and I think it brought this on. I wonder why tho you know?


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TRUMP 2020

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OfflineXUL
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: Icelander]
    #4296941 - 06/14/05 09:34 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

The problem is you don't love yourself unconditionally exactally the way you are. That is where love lives.





yea, so hard tho.. ahh, Ill work on that


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TRUMP 2020

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InvisibleRandalFlagg
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: RandalFlagg]
    #4296954 - 06/14/05 09:37 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Here's my view:

Social anxiety comes from lack of confidence. Lack of confidence arises because you have a poor view or yourself or because other people have a poor view of you and you pick up on that.

The next thing to determine is why whatever is happening is happening. Are you ugly? Are you not fun to be around? Be honest with yourself. There is nothing more pathetic than lying to yourself.

Once you know the truth, you can begin to focus on your strengths. Do you have a good sense of humor? Do you do something well that will get you respect from other people?

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InvisibleBi0TeK
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: XUL]
    #4296957 - 06/14/05 09:38 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

XUL said:
I think I know wat u mean man, Cuz I think I was more confident here for a while in the summer cuz I hadnt been smoking, then I got an eigth of hydro and I been smokin like nuts, and I think it brought this on. I wonder why tho you know?




Because I've been there.

--------------------



--------------------
PROMOTE BACTERIA. THEY'RE THE ONLY CULTURE SOME PEOPLE HAVE.

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InvisibleRavus
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: Bi0TeK]
    #4296973 - 06/14/05 09:40 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

Bi0TeK said:
Quote:

XUL said:
marijuana alot




try cutting that stuff out of your life for a while and see if you notice a difference.

I know I did.





Marijuana makes me much more confident paradoxically. Whenever I smoke it I'm not afraid to go out and socialize with people I barely know, just striking up a conversation and reading their expressions. Alcohol just dumbs me down, but marijuana is perfect.


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So long as you are praised think only that you are not yet on your own path but on that of another.

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OfflineXUL
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: Bi0TeK]
    #4296974 - 06/14/05 09:41 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

Because I've been there.




I didnt mean why did you know,  I mean like I wonder why weed does that.

sorry
:wink:


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OfflineXUL
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: Ravus]
    #4296985 - 06/14/05 09:43 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

Marijuana makes me much more confident paradoxically. Whenever I smoke it I'm not afraid to go out and socialize with people I barely know, just striking up a conversation and reading their expressions. Alcohol just dumbs me down, but marijuana is perfect.




I wish I was like that.. I am somewhat relaxed when high, but it makes me paranoid like a crazy man. I dont get paranoi all teh time, but usually I get some everytime im high.

I only get high for music


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InvisibleBi0TeK
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: XUL]
    #4297029 - 06/14/05 09:51 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

XUL said:
I didnt mean why did you know, I mean like I wonder why weed does that.





who knows?

theres a program on BBC1 (British Broadcasting Corporation) this sunday thats all about the harmful effects of cannabis (paranoia, schizophrenia , lack of motivation etc)

Weed isn't what it was like in the 60's, its now totaly different

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PROMOTE BACTERIA. THEY'RE THE ONLY CULTURE SOME PEOPLE HAVE.

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InvisibleRavus
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: Bi0TeK]
    #4297045 - 06/14/05 09:54 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

You're right! Totally different chemicals man!

No, not really. Weed has stayed the same for thousands of years. We may get some more potent bud now, but the hashish that the Arabs did over a millenia ago was still at least as potent as the best bud the Netherlanders have to offer (maybe not their hash though) and yet there wasn't mass insanity among the Arabs. If anything, when they were big into their hashish and coffee, they were leading the world in mathematics, astronomy and chemistry.

Maybe the hippy's had shitty pot, but the Arabs had some hash that would kick even the best stoner's ass many centuries ago, so marijuana smoking really hasn't changed much.

I'm simply derailing this thread though.


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So long as you are praised think only that you are not yet on your own path but on that of another.

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InvisibleBi0TeK
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: Ravus]
    #4297069 - 06/14/05 09:58 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Whatever Ravus.

I respect your opinion but it simply didnt do myself or any of my friends any good.

It's not for everyone.

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--------------------
PROMOTE BACTERIA. THEY'RE THE ONLY CULTURE SOME PEOPLE HAVE.

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InvisibleRavus
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: Bi0TeK]
    #4297092 - 06/14/05 10:01 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

I wasn't responding to whether it's any good, that's totally variable on the person. But I disagree with the DARE/ DEA endorsed myth that pot has changed from some shitty herb into some superpotent schizophrenic causing reefer, when really it's changed very little if you look at the methods of getting potent marijuana/ hash throughout history.

Pot isn't good for me if I abuse it anyway, a few times a week is the most I like to do it so as to remain mentally clear.


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So long as you are praised think only that you are not yet on your own path but on that of another.

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InvisibleBi0TeK
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: Ravus]
    #4297133 - 06/14/05 10:08 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Whatever.

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--------------------
PROMOTE BACTERIA. THEY'RE THE ONLY CULTURE SOME PEOPLE HAVE.

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InvisibleRavus
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: Bi0TeK] * 1
    #4297170 - 06/14/05 10:18 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

What are you, 12?


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So long as you are praised think only that you are not yet on your own path but on that of another.

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OfflineOrganic
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: Bi0TeK]
    #4297175 - 06/14/05 10:19 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:


Weed isn't what it was like in the 60's, its now totaly different




Sorry, but this is entirely false. Growing knowledge and methods may have improved in the West and there may be more commercially available potent strains out there, but they all came from the strains people were smoking in the 60s and prior. The chemicals in cannabis simply have NOT changed, you just may need to smoke less to achieve the same effect.


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Offlinefaslimy
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: Bi0TeK]
    #4297357 - 06/14/05 11:02 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Go and educate yourself before you try educate other people

http://www.jackherer.com/

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Invisiblebuckwheat
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: Organic]
    #4298999 - 06/15/05 11:05 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

No he's right things have changed. The ultra paranoia Sativas of the 60's and 70's would make him have a seizure if he saw a really hot girl. If anything the indica dominant sensi of today is better for anxiety.In theory anyway but it sure would be alot more forgiving than the pot from back in the day.IMO

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OfflineOrganic
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: buckwheat]
    #4299162 - 06/15/05 11:49 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

I wouldn't say it is "totally different", thats all. SWIM has some seeds from the 70s that were given as "Skunk". They make indica dominant plants. I really don't think you'll find a huge difference between the homegrown of the 60s&70s and that of today. Too many factors go into cannabanoid profiles of plants--environment, care, nutrients, light source, harvest timing, etc. Give those growers some credit, they knew how to harvest for a stony sativa :smile: There was likely as much stony bud going around as racing sativa bud.


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Invisiblerogue_pixie
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: Organic]
    #4299258 - 06/15/05 12:16 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Hmmm I get spasms when I smoke weed.

Maybe it's weed related, but then again, it's probably more likely to be lack of self confidence as Randalf said, who provided some sound advice.


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"Whatever you do, you need to keep moving.  Because when you stop moving you die (physically and emotionally).

Good luck and blessings of happiness and fortune." ~ RandalFlagg RIP


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InvisibleBi0TeK
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: rogue_pixie]
    #4299444 - 06/15/05 12:59 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

rogue_pixie said:
Hmmm I get spasms when I smoke weed.





Yeah, I get them too from weed, its not down to confidence.

Quote:

faslimy said:
Go and educate yourself before you try educate other people

http://www.jackherer.com/




I know all about Jack Herer thank you very much.

And as far as education goes myself and my friends nearly educated ourselves to the point of no return with that shit.

Five out of six of us developed extreme anxiety and paranoia and one commited suicide due to smoking pot.

My neighbour works in the mental health department at my local hospital and has to deal on a daily basis with people who have mental problems due to cannabis use.

XUL stated he smokes a lot of cannabis and I simply advised him to cut back for a while to see if it helps.

Quote:

Ravus said:
You're right! Totally different chemicals man!





Quote:

Organic said:
The chemicals in cannabis simply have NOT changed




Who mentioned anything about chemicals?

When I said its different to the stuff that was around in the 60s I meant in strength.

I don't see you guys offering XUL any advice.

This threads gone totaly off topic.

--------------------



--------------------
PROMOTE BACTERIA. THEY'RE THE ONLY CULTURE SOME PEOPLE HAVE.

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Invisiblerogue_pixie
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: Bi0TeK]
    #4299500 - 06/15/05 01:12 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

I only get spasms when I'm actually stoned though........and I'm guessing he's not stoned all the time, so it may well be something else as well.


--------------------
"Whatever you do, you need to keep moving.  Because when you stop moving you die (physically and emotionally).

Good luck and blessings of happiness and fortune." ~ RandalFlagg RIP


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OfflineJacquesCousteau
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: Bi0TeK]
    #4299566 - 06/15/05 01:26 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Not trying to be a dick here, just want to try to open your eyes to another way of looking at you and your friends' mental health history.

The fact is, birds of a feather flock together. You and your friends all probably had mild versions of the various conditions you named in the first place... it's probably why you ended up being friends.

Marijuana is notorious for increasing paranoia and anxiety in individuals who are already prone to it.

I am not saying frequent marijuana use will not make it worse, because it obviously did. However, I am suggesting that you not jump to a conclusive decision that marijuana CAUSED these conditions. Instead, it's much more likely that it aggravated already existant conditions.

P.S. I could be way off, and you may have your reasons for why I'm way off... but I don't care, because it's just speculation. Something to consider. So consider it, instead of looking for ways to dismiss it.

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InvisibleBi0TeK
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: JacquesCousteau]
    #4299747 - 06/15/05 02:08 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

JacquesCousteau said:
The fact is, birds of a feather flock together. You and your friends all probably had mild versions of the various conditions you named in the first place... it's probably why you ended up being friends.

Marijuana is notorious for increasing paranoia and anxiety in individuals who are already prone to it.





We were adrenaline junkies.

Skateboarding, surfing, bungy jumping, snow boarding, free climbing, jet skiing, you name it we did it. We used to laugh in the face of death. We didn't know the meaning of fear.

We were the life and soul of any party we went to and oozed confidence.

Then we started smoking weed and everything changed.

I'm pretty damn sure it was the weed.

--------------------



--------------------
PROMOTE BACTERIA. THEY'RE THE ONLY CULTURE SOME PEOPLE HAVE.

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Invisiblebuckwheat
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: Organic]
    #4299783 - 06/15/05 02:13 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

Organic said:
I wouldn't say it is "totally different", thats all. SWIM has some seeds from the 70s that were given as "Skunk". They make indica dominant plants. I really don't think you'll find a huge difference between the homegrown of the 60s&70s and that of today. Too many factors go into cannabanoid profiles of plants--environment, care, nutrients, light source, harvest timing, etc. Give those growers some credit, they knew how to harvest for a stony sativa :smile: There was likely as much stony bud going around as racing sativa bud.




I know what your saying. But i was referring to what is commercially available because chances are that unless you grow you're own you will never run into something like Panama red or Vietnamese that was available commercially back then but you can still grow now.

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InvisibleArp
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: buckwheat]
    #4299855 - 06/15/05 02:37 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

I have had simular reactions with girls.

Once I was going to confront a co-worker which I found
attactive. Didnt realy know her or anything and I was going
to ask her something work-related and I started to studder! :crazy:

Another time, pretty recently I was at a club. There
there was this amazing girl. I've had a couple of drinks
that boosted my perceptions but I wasnt realy drunk.
I thought I had to leave an impression and not let it
just pass. My friend agreed. So I made my moove.
I confronted her and said Hi shaking her hand. There I frooze
with a huge grin on my face. Her friend started to laugh &
she just stared. I went back to where I came from and
breathed out :grin:

It's so strange how the body can react.
But confronting your fears is the best thing to do.
Learn your body and how it reacts. Remember breathing. Don't
try to plan everything. I think that can lead to doubt and
it'll fuck up :crazy: But fucking up & making a fool of yourself
can also be a learning experience imho and something you should
try once in awhile :smirk:

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OfflinePowerTrip
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: XUL]
    #4300056 - 06/15/05 03:35 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

This is how you are going to conquer your social anxiety.

I am in the process of defeating social anxiety.  I fought a losing battle to the disorder all through high school.  I will share with you all of the things that have helped most in my life.  I have made a great deal of progress since my youth.

Lift weights.
Aside from the simple fact that weight lifting is very healthy, it will give you a huge boost of confidence when you find yourself face to face with men or women.  Getting muscular is not as difficult as people make it out to be.  If you commit yourself to your training, you will achieve results.  If you try weight lifting whole heartedly, I guarantee you will find some relief.

Take Kanna.
Kanna has helped me very much with social anxiety, especially around women and people who I do not know very well.  You can order it from one of the shroomery sponsors.  It comes in the form of crushed plant material.  All you need is a little pinch under your tongue in the morning and you are good most of the day.  Feel free to redose before all of those parties you get invited to when the women start to notice your new physique, because you have been working out, right? :wink:

Make Friends.
You need to network and try to meet people whenever possible.  Do not decline any invitation to hang out or party with anyone.  The more you get out and meet people the greater your list of acquaintances will grow.  Friends have parties where there are women and beer.  Partake in the beer freely as it will only help you open up, but know your limit.  You won't be taking any women home when you spend the entire night puking in your friend's ficus plant.  Just strike up conversations with anyone you see on a daily basis(school or work).  They will begin to invite you to hang out with them outside of school/work.  This is how we make new friends.

Talk to women.
I have been in your shoes before, and I know exactly what it feels like.  You are completely confused about the way to speak with a woman or how to act towards her.  Forget even trying to ask her out, you have no idea how that is supposed to happen!  This accurately describes the way I felt about women, because I had no experience speaking with them.  Talking to women online at first was very helpful because I quickly began to realize that women are nothing special.  You just have to make small talk or any talk.  Two important things to remember when it comes to talking to women are eye contact and keep her talking about herself.  Do not ramble on about how you won the state chess championship when you were in 3rd grade.  Keep her talking about herself and it will subtly let her know that you are interested in her.  Not to be sexist, but your goal should be getting laid.  The more women you bed, the more confidence you will have around them.  The more confidence you have, the more women will like you.  Interesting the way that works, isn't it?  The guys who get laid are the ones who keep getting laid.

Don't smoke weed!
Personally, weed makes me feel very zoned out and anti-social.  I like weed, but there is a time and a place for it.  The time is once every few weeks and the place is somewhere you can chill by yourself and just enjoy the buzz.  I have a feeling you partake in your weed this way already.  Just stick to a little bit of alcohol at the parties and you will be much more social.

If you need any advice on any of the above topics, feel free to PM me.  I can help you with the weight lifting or kanna dosage or whatever your question may be.  I've been though this.  I want to end social anxiety for anyone who is afflicted by it.


--------------------
I spit reality, instead of what you usually learn
and I refuse to be concerned with condescending advice
cause I'm the only motherfucker that can change my life

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Offlinethe_phoenix
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: PowerTrip]
    #4300593 - 06/15/05 05:24 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Forget these sayings "it doesn't matter what others think", stop trying not to care what others think, stop trying to make yourself inconspicuous and remove yourself from the world, stop trying simply to pass by unnoticed. This is impossible because people notice other people and what everyone thinks of everyone else constitutes the realm of social interaction which is an integral part of humanity.

Instead, assert yourself as an individual. Work on yourself so that you're proud of who you are and so that you needn't fear what others think of you. If you fear what others think it's because you lack confidence in yourself, because you aren't happy with yourself. So you're afraid that others will see your shortcomings. Don't hide your shortcomings from others, and then call it social anxiety to hide them from yourself as well. Work on them and you'll have nothing to fear. Then you can go out proactively in the world, partake in social interaction, and dance the dance of creation.

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Offlinenightkrawler
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: PowerTrip]
    #4300728 - 06/15/05 06:03 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

good advice powertrip :thumbup:

about the whole weed thing, if you have any social anxiety, weed is only going to make it worse while you're high, and maybe even for the rest of the day(in public that is). but, smoking definitely brings people together.

once you start talking to the girl, invite her to smoke with you. with just the two of you getting high(but not too high), you'll probably bond really well. become smoking buddies first. you'll get more comfortable around her like that. usually the only girls i ever hook up with(aside from drunken one night only hookups) are pot smokers. the common ground of smoking pot helps a lot.

when she leaves and the next day rolls around and you are thinking about calling her, ask her to smoke again, then go to the movies or find something to do while you're high. i find it a lot harder to ask girls to go to the movies or somewhere than i do asking them to come over and smoke. when i do this, in my mind it seems more natural, it doesn't feel like i'm asking them out on a date.

i guess the hardest part is the initial meeting and getting her to be interested enough in smoking with you the first time. you just gotta be confident. make eye contact. make it seem like you talk to girls all the time. make it look like you're interested in her, but not too interested.

just my two cents on the whole thing. it's what seems to work for me. hope this helps.


--------------------

Not all who wander are lost - J.R.R. Tolkien

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InvisibleRavus
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: PowerTrip]
    #4301329 - 06/15/05 08:53 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

I've taken pretty massive doses of kanna, both insufflated and chewing, and have never noticed a confidence boost. It's possible that it works for you, or possibly it's a placebo. But whatever works for you eh?

But I agreee, talking to women is the way to go, and is really the main thing that will help. Experience is without a doubt the best teacher; if you talk to women and actually feel the sting of rejection and notice what to say and what not to do, you'll not only boost your confidence but actually increase your skills.


--------------------
So long as you are praised think only that you are not yet on your own path but on that of another.

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Invisiblerogue_pixie
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: PowerTrip]
    #4301509 - 06/15/05 09:44 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

PowerTrip said:Not to be sexist, but your goal should be getting laid.  The more women you bed, the more confidence you will have around them.  The more confidence you have, the more women will like you.




Not true. Using women as tools to help massage your ego is not the way forward. :rolleyes: And it will not make more women like you.


--------------------
"Whatever you do, you need to keep moving.  Because when you stop moving you die (physically and emotionally).

Good luck and blessings of happiness and fortune." ~ RandalFlagg RIP


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InvisibleRavus
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: rogue_pixie]
    #4301532 - 06/15/05 09:50 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Not necessarily. There's plenty of women to fuck, but there's only one ego to massage that's relevent to you. A man's ego is more important than the women he gets practice from.


--------------------
So long as you are praised think only that you are not yet on your own path but on that of another.

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Invisiblerogue_pixie
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: Ravus]
    #4301540 - 06/15/05 09:52 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

yeah if you're a selfish twat.


--------------------
"Whatever you do, you need to keep moving.  Because when you stop moving you die (physically and emotionally).

Good luck and blessings of happiness and fortune." ~ RandalFlagg RIP


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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: rogue_pixie]
    #4301556 - 06/15/05 09:57 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Women like that in a man. It makes him appear confident and gets rid of social anxiety.

Haven't you ever heard that many women like assholes? It's for a good reason.


--------------------
So long as you are praised think only that you are not yet on your own path but on that of another.

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Invisiblerogue_pixie
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: Ravus]
    #4301572 - 06/15/05 10:00 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Submissive doormats may like that.


--------------------
"Whatever you do, you need to keep moving.  Because when you stop moving you die (physically and emotionally).

Good luck and blessings of happiness and fortune." ~ RandalFlagg RIP


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OfflinePowerTrip
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: Ravus]
    #4301589 - 06/15/05 10:04 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

I never told him to use women to further his ego. I simply explained that as he experiences anxiety around women, sleeping with a few would definitely ease that pain. It is a fact that a man's confidence is directly tied to the amount of sex he is getting. Please do not respond with "yeah if he is a shallow asshole pig of a twat." I would apologize for the way the male psyche operates, but a man should never apologize to a woman.


--------------------
I spit reality, instead of what you usually learn
and I refuse to be concerned with condescending advice
cause I'm the only motherfucker that can change my life

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InvisibleRavus
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: PowerTrip]
    #4301593 - 06/15/05 10:05 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

a man should never apologize to a woman.




:thumbup:


--------------------
So long as you are praised think only that you are not yet on your own path but on that of another.

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Invisiblerogue_pixie
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: PowerTrip]
    #4301609 - 06/15/05 10:09 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

PowerTrip said:a man should never apologize to a woman.




You really are a moron.

And probably still a virgin, if you think that's the way to treat women.


--------------------
"Whatever you do, you need to keep moving.  Because when you stop moving you die (physically and emotionally).

Good luck and blessings of happiness and fortune." ~ RandalFlagg RIP


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Offlineotoroko
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: Ravus]
    #4301662 - 06/15/05 10:22 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Weed is not a magic drug that just causes paranoia, it makes one more self aware . You start to think/see everything (when anxious) as because/relating to you, and this can be too much to handle. And it self reinforces that kind of thought, think for example places/events that commonly trigger anxiety, do you get a feeling of it just by thinking of it? Try this: when anxious, pay attention to how much useless "vocal thought" is running in your head, I had it bad. Think where it comes from, "you" are generating it based on you're version of reality. Pay attention what your body is doing, this is generated by your mind.

You should lay off the weed before you are again comfortable with it.
(I had to quit for approx half a year, then came back to it. when you realize how much of anything happens in your head, it's not much of an issue anymore)

Working out.To keep this short, the body is also (projection of) your sub-consciousness.


--------------------
when you're watching television the higher brain regions (like the midbrain and the neo-cortex) are shut down, and most activity shifts to the lower brain regions (like the limbic system). The right hemisphere is twice as active as the left, a neurological anomaly. The crossover from left to right releases a surge of the body?s natural opiates: endorphins, which include beta-endorphins and enkephalins. Endorphins are structurally identical to opium and its derivatives (morphine, codeine, heroin, etc.).After just 30 seconds of watching television the brain begins to produce alpha waves, which indicates torpid (almost comatose) rates of activity.

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InvisibleRavus
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: rogue_pixie]
    #4301686 - 06/15/05 10:26 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

rogue_pixie said:
Quote:

PowerTrip said:a man should never apologize to a woman.




You really are a moron.

And probably still a virgin, if you think that's the way to treat women.




You act as if it's hard to get laid, when even the most beautiful of women can be melted by a confident man who knows the right things to say and do. You don't actually go up to women and tell them these things, but many men know it's true.


--------------------
So long as you are praised think only that you are not yet on your own path but on that of another.

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OfflinePowerTrip
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: rogue_pixie]
    #4301811 - 06/15/05 10:51 PM (18 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

And probably still a virgin, if you think that's the way to treat women.




Oh, I know that's the way to treat women. :wink:

If you have a problem with me please take it to PM's.  I don't see you actually trying to help this guy.  I have been in his shoes.  I find it hard to believe that you really understand what it is like to live as a man with social anxiety.  I find it even more difficult to accept that you would know how a man would go about getting over his fear of women.

Final Lesson:
Never, ever, under any circumstances, should you take dating advice from a woman.


--------------------
I spit reality, instead of what you usually learn
and I refuse to be concerned with condescending advice
cause I'm the only motherfucker that can change my life

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Offlinebhopkinz
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: PowerTrip]
    #4302115 - 06/16/05 12:02 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

i find it surprising that so many guys around here just wanna get laid.now call me macho, but to me theres nothin more important than being a man.and fuck yea i love sex, but that doesnt mean i have to go around acting like a fool who's too "tough" to actually be sincere and sensitive with women.

dont go around with the sole aim of having sex.have different relationships with women where you have sex but ALSO have the other side of a relationship where you care about each other.being with one partner often doesnt work out because you get bored with each other or are around each other too much. having more than one chick allows you to get a different vibe each time you get laid and a different kind of conversation with each girl. its fun cuz u get more than one personality and u get to meet more people (their friends) so its great in tackling social anxiety. eventually from these relations?ps you'll find one thta means more to you than all the rest. then jsut settle down with her and ull be fine.

theres nothin more imp?rtant in life. u can say all the macho shit u want, but to me its just as important for me to get hugged and listened to by a girl that likes me when ive had a bad day than get laid.

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OfflineXUL
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: bhopkinz]
    #4303086 - 06/16/05 10:07 AM (18 years, 9 months ago)

well thanks doods, ill take this advise and use it

thanks


--------------------
TRUMP 2020

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InvisibleEgo Death
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: XUL]
    #4575390 - 08/24/05 03:35 PM (18 years, 7 months ago)

Your mental mapping is incorrect

Blame your scoiety

Go re-program yourself.


--------------------

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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: bhopkinz]
    #4577223 - 08/24/05 11:18 PM (18 years, 7 months ago)

word bhopkinz

sex will always be the driving force but becoming obsessed with it just leads to an emptiness... a robotic repetitiveness, things lose their color...

real girls have so much more magic in them

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OfflineGrav
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: Grav]
    #4577243 - 08/24/05 11:22 PM (18 years, 7 months ago)

i suppose it might all be called "sexual" energy though

girls are everything if you ask me... in some mysterious way

do not fear them

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OfflineMJF
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: Bi0TeK]
    #4594139 - 08/29/05 02:06 AM (18 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

Bi0TeK said:
Quote:

JacquesCousteau said:
The fact is, birds of a feather flock together. You and your friends all probably had mild versions of the various conditions you named in the first place... it's probably why you ended up being friends.

Marijuana is notorious for increasing paranoia and anxiety in individuals who are already prone to it.





We were adrenaline junkies.

Skateboarding, surfing, bungy jumping, snow boarding, free climbing, jet skiing, you name it we did it. We used to laugh in the face of death. We didn't know the meaning of fear.

We were the life and soul of any party we went to and oozed confidence.

Then we started smoking weed and everything changed.

I'm pretty damn sure it was the weed.





That is the dumbest shit I've ever heard.  :blush: sorry but i had to say it. how can you say that weed was THE cause? imo it's impossible to trace that back to a single cause and if you were to do that....i would agree more with God/Universe being the cause rather than weed. there were probably lots of factors involved.

Edited by MJF (08/29/05 02:07 AM)

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OfflineMJF
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: rogue_pixie]
    #4594150 - 08/29/05 02:11 AM (18 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

rogue_pixie said:
Quote:

PowerTrip said:Not to be sexist, but your goal should be getting laid.  The more women you bed, the more confidence you will have around them.  The more confidence you have, the more women will like you.




Not true. Using women as tools to help massage your ego is not the way forward. :rolleyes: And it will not make more women like you.




i'm wondering what kind of guy you are attracted to rouge-pixie.

attraction is a pretty much subjective thing.

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InvisibleVirgilKane
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: XUL]
    #4605809 - 08/31/05 09:02 PM (18 years, 6 months ago)

Quote:

I wish I was like that.. I am somewhat relaxed when high, but it makes me paranoid like a crazy man. I don't get paranoi all teh time, but usually I get some everytime im high.




Sounds like this could be part of the problem. I know that I used to feel like this a lot. I also smoked a lot at that time. When I used to get paranoid smoking I would go into myself a lot and stay there. Very introspective and introverted especially if I smoked alone. IMO social anxiety AND paranoia are about the same thing. Not scientifically I know, but personally.

Feeling this anxiety straight is much different than feeling it stoned in my case. Live with yourself straight for a while and all those fucked up thoughts that you have about yourself won't be as bad as they are when your stoned. And after a while you'll probably just say "fuck it...I am who I am and fuck anyone who has a problem with it". It's just hard to do that when you have a bunch of crazy thoughts or opinions about yourself going on in your head from being stoned. Maybe just save the smoking for when you're with someone else and that way it'll help keep you from going "inside" so much and help you gain confidence from hanging out with someone.

Chances are that one day you will happen into a situation where you're suddenly taken off guard and find yourself talking at ease with a stranger at school and this will start to build your self-confidence and will automatically be the first step into something good.

Hang in there,,,
it'll get better


--------------------
Absense of evidence is not evidence of absense...

"Religion is a defense against a religious experience"
              Carl G. Jung

 
"So really, ordinary reality is a kind of chemical habit, sanctioned by culture, which says it's okay to use certain drugs, eat certain foods, and have certain sexual behaviors. However, when you transcend all this pre-conditioning by returning to the original wisdom of the animal body, then you discover this immense dimension of opportunity. For some people, it is a frightening risk. To me, that's the psychedelic experience."
Terence McKenna

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OfflineRifki
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: PowerTrip]
    #16949493 - 10/01/12 11:50 PM (11 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

PowerTrip said:
This is how you are going to conquer your social anxiety.

I am in the process of defeating social anxiety.  I fought a losing battle to the disorder all through high school.  I will share with you all of the things that have helped most in my life.  I have made a great deal of progress since my youth.

Lift weights.
Aside from the simple fact that weight lifting is very healthy, it will give you a huge boost of confidence when you find yourself face to face with men or women.  Getting muscular is not as difficult as people make it out to be.  If you commit yourself to your training, you will achieve results.  If you try weight lifting whole heartedly, I guarantee you will find some relief.

Take Kanna.
Kanna has helped me very much with social anxiety, especially around women and people who I do not know very well.  You can order it from one of the shroomery sponsors.  It comes in the form of crushed plant material.  All you need is a little pinch under your tongue in the morning and you are good most of the day.  Feel free to redose before all of those parties you get invited to when the women start to notice your new physique, because you have been working out, right? :wink:

Make Friends.
You need to network and try to meet people whenever possible.  Do not decline any invitation to hang out or party with anyone.  The more you get out and meet people the greater your list of acquaintances will grow.  Friends have parties where there are women and beer.  Partake in the beer freely as it will only help you open up, but know your limit.  You won't be taking any women home when you spend the entire night puking in your friend's ficus plant.  Just strike up conversations with anyone you see on a daily basis(school or work).  They will begin to invite you to hang out with them outside of school/work.  This is how we make new friends.

Talk to women.
I have been in your shoes before, and I know exactly what it feels like.  You are completely confused about the way to speak with a woman or how to act towards her.  Forget even trying to ask her out, you have no idea how that is supposed to happen!  This accurately describes the way I felt about women, because I had no experience speaking with them.  Talking to women online at first was very helpful because I quickly began to realize that women are nothing special.  You just have to make small talk or any talk.  Two important things to remember when it comes to talking to women are eye contact and keep her talking about herself.  Do not ramble on about how you won the state chess championship when you were in 3rd grade.  Keep her talking about herself and it will subtly let her know that you are interested in her.  Not to be sexist, but your goal should be getting laid.  The more women you bed, the more confidence you will have around them.  The more confidence you have, the more women will like you.  Interesting the way that works, isn't it?  The guys who get laid are the ones who keep getting laid.

Don't smoke weed!
Personally, weed makes me feel very zoned out and anti-social.  I like weed, but there is a time and a place for it.  The time is once every few weeks and the place is somewhere you can chill by yourself and just enjoy the buzz.  I have a feeling you partake in your weed this way already.  Just stick to a little bit of alcohol at the parties and you will be much more social.

If you need any advice on any of the above topics, feel free to PM me.  I can help you with the weight lifting or kanna dosage or whatever your question may be.  I've been though this.  I want to end social anxiety for anyone who is afflicted by it.


 

(i kinda feel likea douch for quoting the whole post)
                that being said...
                :seriousthumbsup:

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OfflineXUL
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Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: Rifki]
    #16950950 - 10/02/12 09:51 AM (11 years, 5 months ago)

Quote:

Rifki said:
Quote:

PowerTrip said:
This is how you are going to conquer your social anxiety.

I am in the process of defeating social anxiety.  I fought a losing battle to the disorder all through high school.  I will share with you all of the things that have helped most in my life.  I have made a great deal of progress since my youth.

Lift weights.
Aside from the simple fact that weight lifting is very healthy, it will give you a huge boost of confidence when you find yourself face to face with men or women.  Getting muscular is not as difficult as people make it out to be.  If you commit yourself to your training, you will achieve results.  If you try weight lifting whole heartedly, I guarantee you will find some relief.

Take Kanna.
Kanna has helped me very much with social anxiety, especially around women and people who I do not know very well.  You can order it from one of the shroomery sponsors.  It comes in the form of crushed plant material.  All you need is a little pinch under your tongue in the morning and you are good most of the day.  Feel free to redose before all of those parties you get invited to when the women start to notice your new physique, because you have been working out, right? :wink:

Make Friends.
You need to network and try to meet people whenever possible.  Do not decline any invitation to hang out or party with anyone.  The more you get out and meet people the greater your list of acquaintances will grow.  Friends have parties where there are women and beer.  Partake in the beer freely as it will only help you open up, but know your limit.  You won't be taking any women home when you spend the entire night puking in your friend's ficus plant.  Just strike up conversations with anyone you see on a daily basis(school or work).  They will begin to invite you to hang out with them outside of school/work.  This is how we make new friends.

Talk to women.
I have been in your shoes before, and I know exactly what it feels like.  You are completely confused about the way to speak with a woman or how to act towards her.  Forget even trying to ask her out, you have no idea how that is supposed to happen!  This accurately describes the way I felt about women, because I had no experience speaking with them.  Talking to women online at first was very helpful because I quickly began to realize that women are nothing special.  You just have to make small talk or any talk.  Two important things to remember when it comes to talking to women are eye contact and keep her talking about herself.  Do not ramble on about how you won the state chess championship when you were in 3rd grade.  Keep her talking about herself and it will subtly let her know that you are interested in her.  Not to be sexist, but your goal should be getting laid.  The more women you bed, the more confidence you will have around them.  The more confidence you have, the more women will like you.  Interesting the way that works, isn't it?  The guys who get laid are the ones who keep getting laid.

Don't smoke weed!
Personally, weed makes me feel very zoned out and anti-social.  I like weed, but there is a time and a place for it.  The time is once every few weeks and the place is somewhere you can chill by yourself and just enjoy the buzz.  I have a feeling you partake in your weed this way already.  Just stick to a little bit of alcohol at the parties and you will be much more social.

If you need any advice on any of the above topics, feel free to PM me.  I can help you with the weight lifting or kanna dosage or whatever your question may be.  I've been though this.  I want to end social anxiety for anyone who is afflicted by it.


 

(i kinda feel likea douch for quoting the whole post)
                that being said...
                :seriousthumbsup:





I tried this method for 10 long years and made very little progress. I think some people just have an anxiety that needs more attention. Therapy and possibly medication for a short time. That is what a psychologist recommended to me, and I am going to take his advice and try a new approach.

And here is what I responded to another recent post.

Quote:

This is pretty great advice.

Last month I finally decided to seek help for my social anxiety issues.

The Doctor was great. He made sure that I knew that anxiety is indeed beatable.

I told him I had been using techniques like LittleDister is talking about. I had been saying "NO" to anxiety it my mind, literally. And it works to some extent, but there comes a point where eventually my anxiety is too strong which when breathing techniques and a strong mental constitution do not help.

The doctor told me that it's normal. He said that the best way to beat anxiety is medication AND therapy. And so, when I get home that is what I will do. I can't wait. I am very excited to wage a ware against my anxiety.

Just make sure you don't let anxiety beat you. I am a VERY socially anxious guy, but I still live a full life. I was a fireman for 5 years, I am in the Navy, I graduated from college, and I go on dates. Yes, I am socially terrified during much of the experience, but that doesn't stop me. Push forward and be sure to live a full life regardless of anxiety.




--------------------
TRUMP 2020

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Offlinenhmi
Stranger
Registered: 08/18/13
Posts: 44
Last seen: 10 years, 2 months
Re: Social Anxiety from HELL [Re: XUL]
    #18722886 - 08/18/13 01:31 PM (10 years, 7 months ago)

hope you start to feel better man

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