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 Amber_Glow
Sat Chit Anand
Registered: 09/02/02
Posts: 1,543
Last seen: 11 years, 1 month
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 Panic attack once complete understanding of death is reached? 
#3402512 - 11/24/04 05:51 AM (19 years, 4 months ago) |
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This could be a hard one to explain. I suppose the only people that could relate to this are athiests, or at least those who believe there is no afterlife.
When I was maybe 15 or so (don't remember really) I had come to a full athiestic understanding that there was no God and no afterlife. At night I would lie in bed waiting to sleep and ponder exactly what death entailed. I would think deeper and deeper about what exactly nonexistence was. Eventually I would come to a point where it was like I reached a full realization of exactly what it was like to not exist, and that I was going to not exist for an eternity.
At this point I would have what was perhaps a panic attack. I have never had anything like this in any other situation, so maybe I am mislabeling what happened. But basically I would reach the point of fully realizing death, and suddenly it was like my whole life came crashing down around me. It was kind of like dying for a second, really. I would become enraged by the fact that my life was utterly and completely pointless because I was just going to die anyway. It would become hard to breath and I would have no control over my emotions. I think it is the lowest point one can ever sink to.
I'm not sure if I am explaining this well enough, and it is extremely hard to explain anyway. What happens at that point of understanding death is extremely trippy and not like anything that one would normally experience. This happened like maybe 4 times probably, and ever since then I just do not steer my mind in the direction of another full realization of nonexistence.
Has this ever happened to anyone else?
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irishboy
Stranger
Registered: 11/24/04
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Re: Panic attack once complete understanding of death is reached? [Re: Amber_Glow]
#3402545 - 11/24/04 06:04 AM (19 years, 4 months ago) |
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I understand what you say...
I suffer with anxiety and panic and I have often thought I got so panicy because I felt I was overeducated about certain things and knew exactly what would happen.
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 spudamore
Stranger
Registered: 06/12/03
Posts: 1,460
Loc: Australia
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Re: Panic attack once complete understanding of death is reached? [Re: Amber_Glow]
#3402650 - 11/24/04 07:22 AM (19 years, 4 months ago) |
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i have came across this too since i was 4 or 5 years old. still get it but very rare now. have to get up and put my mind on something else for it to go away. how can we overcome this??
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suicide a permanent solution to a temporary problem
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druqks46
its dat woowoo
Registered: 09/29/04
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Re: Panic attack once complete understanding of death is reached? [Re: spudamore]
#3402764 - 11/24/04 08:33 AM (19 years, 4 months ago) |
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My cousin (very close friend) has had some serious panic attacks about death. He mentioned the movie donnie darko and something like that was gonna happen to hiim. he freaked out in his class. i feel bad for the poor kid.
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Shroomism
Space Travellin
Registered: 02/13/00
Posts: 66,015
Loc: 9th Dimension
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Re: Panic attack once complete understanding of death is reached? [Re: Amber_Glow]
#3402776 - 11/24/04 08:39 AM (19 years, 4 months ago) |
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It sounds like you were inducing the panic attack on yourself....
The solution is to breathe.. slowly.. deeply.. and rhythmically..
meditate on your center and just breathe
of course if you think about death as nothingness and having no control over your own free will, you are setting yourself up for that kind of thing.
I once had a near death experience and it was nothing like that.. it was very peaceful and blissful and floating feeling. There was no fear or what ifs.
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redgreenvines
irregular verb
Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 38,169
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Re: Panic attack once complete understanding of death is reached? [Re: Amber_Glow]
#3402920 - 11/24/04 09:29 AM (19 years, 4 months ago) |
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non-existence is not comprehensible.
that it is totally different is a shocking concept.
going into a different state is like sliding at an angle inconsistent with the current universe or dimension.
kind of like flowing into sleep
or diving into sleep
or tumbling into sleep.
same as with into death.
anxiety won't help the passage.
we don't know what is met up with during that transit.
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esin
cheesefondue
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Posts: 1,275
Loc: Lysergia
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Re: Panic attack once complete understanding of death is reached? [Re: Amber_Glow]
#3402981 - 11/24/04 09:52 AM (19 years, 4 months ago) |
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Yes, i can totally relate to your experiences.
They mostly happened when i was a kid too, than i learnt things are just the way they are and, like you, started avoiding steering my mind in that direction.
They would happen exactly like you, i'd first think what is it like to be dead and it would come to a point where i would realize everything here is pointless and would feel extremely anxious. Not quite anxiety, another kind of feeling i can't really describe.
Funny it was also always when i was trying to sleep. It would usually result in much difficulty sleeping.
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fireworks_god
Sexy.Butt.McDanger
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Re: Panic attack once complete understanding of death is reached? [Re: irishboy]
#3403099 - 11/24/04 10:22 AM (19 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
irishboy said:
I suffer with anxiety and panic and I have often thought I got so panicy because I felt I was overeducated about certain things and knew exactly what would happen.
For one thing, there is no such thing as being "overeducated". 
I don't think you experienced anxiety and panic because you knew exactly what was going to happen, I think it has more to do with either being mentally uncomfortable with either what you knew would happen or the fact that you think you know too much and have the ability to know what will happen. 
Reality is completely void of emotion and preference - what happens, happens, how you yourself feel about that is ultimately your own choice (whether you consciously make it or not). Learn to accept reality as it is, without emotional attachment. Panic and anxiety will no longer exist.
And to the original poster, it does not seem to me that you had a full realization of death because you still had an aspect of your mind that could not accept the experience of that realization. Your mind was still controlling your perception of reality, overriding it, and applying to it a long line of negative emotions - panic, etc. etc. etc. Death is inevitable and is reality, it is seriously insanity to not accept it and subsequent experiences related to it.
 
Peace. 
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If I should die this very moment
I wouldn't fear
For I've never known completeness
Like being here
Wrapped in the warmth of you
Loving every breath of you
  
 
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Amber_Glow
Sat Chit Anand
Registered: 09/02/02
Posts: 1,543
Last seen: 11 years, 1 month
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Re: Panic attack once complete understanding of death is reached? [Re: fireworks_god]
#3403319 - 11/24/04 11:18 AM (19 years, 4 months ago) |
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Not a full realization of death because I didn't want to accept it? Negative emotions?
I don't see how one can pleasantly interpret the fact that they will cease to exist forever.
When one's mind thinks deeply and gets to a point where you can fathom the eternity you are on the brink of entering...ugh.
How can one accept death? I think I might be one of those nuts someday who will pay like 10 million dollars to have my body frozen so that I at least have some chance to live on.
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fireworks_god
Sexy.Butt.McDanger
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Posts: 24,855
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Re: Panic attack once complete understanding of death is reached? [Re: Amber_Glow]
#3403352 - 11/24/04 11:26 AM (19 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
Amber_Glow said:
How can one accept death?
To repeat myself, how can one not accept death? How can one trash violently agansit a rip tide in an effort to arrive at an imagined place that is impossible to get to?
We already know we are going to die, my friend. Every ounce of energy you waste in an effortless mental struggle, attempting to support the continuation of an imagined sense of self that already knows it will cease to be is only seperating yourself from your life, right here, right now, and your living it.
A car just drove down the street viewable through my window. To mentally deny that fact and strive to make it not so is exactly the same as to disagree with the inevitability of death. I guarantee your negative emotions suffered due to a glitch in the programming of your mind, associated with death, will cease to be when you face reality and accept it as it stands.
Peace.
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If I should die this very moment
I wouldn't fear
For I've never known completeness
Like being here
Wrapped in the warmth of you
Loving every breath of you
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Amber_Glow
Sat Chit Anand
Registered: 09/02/02
Posts: 1,543
Last seen: 11 years, 1 month
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Re: Panic attack once complete understanding of death is reached? [Re: fireworks_god]
#3403944 - 11/24/04 01:36 PM (19 years, 4 months ago) |
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...
You're misunderstanding me. You're reading into this as if I am crying for help because I am depressed because I realized I was going to die. It's nothing like that.
When I say I don't accept death, I mean that I would go to great lengths to avoid it. Wish I was born 2,000 years in the future so maybe they could stick my brain into a robot body, like Krang!
The after effects of these low points of realization were actually that love is great and I need to live it up while I am here.
Does anyone remember that cartoon show Gargoyles? I remember watching this when I was a kid, and I believe the main villain was some dude that was always doing crazy evil shit because he wanted to find some secret to eternal life. I can sympathize with him.
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redgreenvines
irregular verb
Registered: 04/08/04
Posts: 38,169
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Re: Panic attack once complete understanding of death is reached? [Re: Amber_Glow]
#3403969 - 11/24/04 01:42 PM (19 years, 4 months ago) |
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you already have as much eternal life as is sustainable
need to identify with gaia
& with sangha
3 refuges maybe
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deff
just love everyone
Registered: 05/01/04
Posts: 9,428
Loc: clarity 
Last seen: 2 hours, 37 minutes
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Re: Panic attack once complete understanding of death is reached? [Re: redgreenvines]
#3404084 - 11/24/04 02:03 PM (19 years, 4 months ago) |
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the harder you grab
the harder it is to let go
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redtailedhawk
Explorer of the Mystery
Registered: 11/24/04
Posts: 559
Loc: The Old Continent
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Re: Panic attack once complete understanding of death is reached? [Re: Amber_Glow]
#3404416 - 11/24/04 03:10 PM (19 years, 4 months ago) |
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Amber_Glow I understand what you're saying. I'm experiencing this thing from time to time also (including anxiety/panic attacks). What other people here probably don't realize is that is possible to indulge and/or observe the fact that one is going to die from various angles. One can experience this fact with his body, his feelings, his mind or his spirit (ethereal sensations). Try to switch in between of your body, feelings, mind and spirit the next time you'll indulge in the fact of your own mortality. It will be a completely different experience... a lot more natural and not so full of feelings of panic and dread.
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 "Who are you who live in all these many forms? You're death that captures all. You too are the source of all that's gonna be born. You're glory, mercy, peace, truth. You give calm a spirit, understanding, courage, the contented heart."
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BlueCoyote
Beyond
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Re: Panic attack once complete understanding of death is reached? [Re: redtailedhawk]
#3404481 - 11/24/04 03:28 PM (19 years, 4 months ago) |
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I think, the chances are not soo bad, that there could be an after (before/between)-life and our soul really has something eternal.
I think that keeps the excitement high, instead of panic.
And if there is not ? Ok, bad luck, doesn't matter anymore, but perhaps therefore, before I did something 'good' 
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deff
just love everyone
Registered: 05/01/04
Posts: 9,428
Loc: clarity
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Re: Panic attack once complete understanding of death is reached? [Re: BlueCoyote]
#3404556 - 11/24/04 03:39 PM (19 years, 4 months ago) |
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'chances' don't really apply to what is
but I agree, there is no end to nothing
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question_for_joo
i'm left. youall can bite me
Registered: 04/30/03
Posts: 1,591
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Re: Panic attack once complete understanding of death is reached? [Re: deff]
#3404978 - 11/24/04 04:41 PM (19 years, 4 months ago) |
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There Is No Life...In The Void...Only...Death....
so you should go smoke another bowl, but like, i know you were gonna do that anyway
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youi was a pig informatnt so you can go fuckyoruselfs
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zorbman
blarrr
Registered: 06/04/04
Posts: 5,952
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Re: Panic attack once complete understanding of death is reached? [Re: Amber_Glow]
#3405786 - 11/24/04 08:06 PM (19 years, 4 months ago) |
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You should read some real life examples of how people behaved when they knew they were dying. The great majority meet death with peaceful acceptance. Old people particularly are grateful to give up their feeble bodies which have become prisons. Or obvious prisons I should say. Have you ever thought of your body as a prison?
Death doesn't have to drag most people kicking and screaming. And there are things worse than death. If you must spend time thinking of death, consider that as well. Yes, ponder that one as well.
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“The crisis takes a much longer time coming than you think, and then it happens much faster than you would have thought.” -- Rudiger Dornbusch
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Anthrax
Werd
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Loc: GAINESVILLE, Fl
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Re: Panic attack once complete understanding of death is reached? [Re: fireworks_god]
#3405932 - 11/24/04 08:46 PM (19 years, 4 months ago) |
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Quote:
fireworks_god said:
A car just drove down the street viewable through my window. To mentally deny that fact and strive to make it not so is exactly the same as to disagree with the inevitability of death. I guarantee your negative emotions suffered due to a glitch in the programming of your mind, associated with death, will cease to be when you face reality and accept it as it stands.
I totally agree on him I mean just deal with it its not gonna be like you will live forever its impossible to deny yourself death just like to deny your alive. The reality of it is you will die whether you believe we go somewhere or we don't I guess thats up to you, but NONE of us know if we go somewhere after death. So why spend your precious minutes you have on earth thinking about death when you could be doing something just except death and live with it, it will happen to you sometime.
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Werd
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zahudulallah
Sexual Heretic
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Re: Panic attack once complete understanding of death is reached? [Re: Amber_Glow]
#3405946 - 11/24/04 08:50 PM (19 years, 4 months ago) |
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I hate to sound preachy, but there is a God.
A panic attack because you "realized" you weren't going to exist after death? Talk about self induced. Man you atheists crack me up sometimes. If the Big Long Sleep scares the shit out of, try something else.
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