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InvisibleMOTH
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The importance of sex in marriage
    #3327778 - 11/06/04 03:50 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

How important is a healthy sex life within a marriage really? And what would you consider a "healthy sex life?"


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InvisibleSwami
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Re: The importance of sex in marriage [Re: MOTH]
    #3327821 - 11/06/04 04:04 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

The neighbor lady comes over frequently for afternoon trysts with me. She sez it helps to keep her marriage together.

Rodney Dangerfield: "My wife likes to talk during sex. She will call me from the hotel room..."


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The proof is in the pudding.


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InvisibleHuehuecoyotl
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Re: The importance of sex in marriage [Re: Swami]
    #3328180 - 11/06/04 06:40 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

It is very important, but not the be all end all. Healthy...who knows?


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"A warrior is a hunter. He calculates everything. That's control. Once his calculations are over, he acts. He lets go. That's abandon. A warrior is not a leaf at the mercy of the wind. No one can push him; no one can make him do things against himself or against his better judgment. A warrior is tuned to survive, and he survives in the best of all possible fashions." ― Carlos Castaneda


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Invisiblespudamore
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Re: The importance of sex in marriage [Re: Huehuecoyotl]
    #3328227 - 11/06/04 06:51 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

How important is a healthy sex life within a marriage really?

i think it is pretty important, one should be able to connect with the partner on all levels. but i really don't know because not married.

And what would you consider a "healthy sex life?"
i don't think one could consider what a healthy sex life is, maybe unhealthy sex life..


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suicide a permanent solution to a temporary problem


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OfflineGomp
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Re: The importance of sex in marriage [Re: spudamore]
    #3328352 - 11/06/04 07:33 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

""in marriage""
the state of being united to a person of the opposite sex as husband or wife in a legal, consensual, and contractual relationship recognized and sanctioned by and dissolvable only by law


well.. could you get more 'united to a person' than you can during sex? not saying that you can not :P


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Disclaimer!?


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OfflineMarkostheGnostic
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Re: The importance of sex in marriage [Re: MOTH]
    #3328400 - 11/06/04 08:03 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

When my Lady and I first came together (no pun intended), we would go at it 6 times a night. That was 8 years ago. Taking the eventual death of novelty into account, and my sexual starvation at that time, sex is still extremely important to me but these variables plus my age of 51 reduces the frequency from my perspective. If my Lady initiates, I'm always ready, but she's not a horny 21 year old either. I still find it necessary to 'milk the Cow[pers]' once or twice a day (hey, use it or lose it), and I'm sure that frequency would increase if I didn't practice this bit of psychosexual hygiene every day.

Now, I have a childhood friend who lived in rural New Hampshire and didn't have sex for 15 years! I couldn't do that. He married at 47 to a 47 year old virgin! (Believe it, or not!). I was the Best Man, and I'm the one who thought to buy the condoms and K-Y Jelly for their wedding night, so for them, sex, even defloration, wasn't the highest priority. These people don't talk about sex - I'm amazed at how conservative he turned out to be, but I don't think that she is a Lady who only appears demure and repressed but is actually a wildcat in bed. I don't think that sex is all that important for either of them, they're not having children, they're the same ethicity and culture and those things greatly determine the nature of their marriage, which seems to be OK for them.

I don't think I can answer your question is a general way. Sex is very important to me, not AS important to my Lady, and I have friends like us, and friends like the couple I mentioned. All couples have been together for years, so your answer must be answered by each maried couple.


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γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself


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InvisibleNariusFractal
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Re: The importance of sex in marriage [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #3328423 - 11/06/04 08:13 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

so, from these responses, it seems sex is only as important to you as you make it to be.

And of course, in any relationship you must acknowledge your partners view of sex or anything else.

and they must do the same in return for you, hopefully you figure this out and can have a healthy relation


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You are the microcosm of the macrocosm.


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OfflineMarkostheGnostic
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Re: The importance of sex in marriage [Re: NariusFractal]
    #3328677 - 11/06/04 10:13 PM (12 years, 9 months ago)

It is as important to be matched on the sexual domain as it is on other fronts: intellectual, moral, spiritual, physical. In other words, there has to be a 'good fit' (no pun intended) across the board. Personally, I wish to see sex as more than sex. I want to have a Tantric or Kabbalistic view of conjugal union as Conjunctio Oppositorum, as Yab-Yab, Hatha [Sun-Moon] Yoga [Union], Tifereth and Shekinah/Matronit/Malkuth, God and Goddess, Yin-Yang, Shiva-Shakti, Karuna-Compassion.

In connection with this I'd like to posit the following: Full Union in Love between Male and Female - Holy Matrimony - Tantric Union, can only occur if the order of operations is correct. That is, IF the Union begins with the Head (Intellect) and enough intercourse occurs on this level, it descends to melt the Heart (Love), at which point and only at this point is it correct to continue Union at the Loins (Instinct). Instinct NEVER 'becomes' Love, and so, if one attempts Union at the juncture of Instinct, the attempt will always fail.


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γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself


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