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How to integrate my psilocybin experience into my life?
    #29645965 -

I had my first psilocybin trip and all felt right with the world! I have been on a long healing journey and I had no idea what to expect and did very little research on what the experience might be like, but I have just felt within myself that I  was finally ready to experience it. I felt absolute feelings of unity, sacredness, ultimate truth, unshakeable peace. I felt like I was meeting a living ... Thing? I don't know what to call it. Like a presence or just a state of being that was alive. Like we are all a part of a giant living tree, each of us tiny branches connected. It felt like there is a level of consciousness that I was not aware of before my trip. It felt like I was near the presence of those that have passed away, and that they are not really gone. I felt like I could see or sense other people's energy. It felt like everything we do in life is just an effort to express this part of us. Apologies if that makes little sense, it's very difficult to put it into words and wrap my head around.

It all felt like such a profound experience of love and insight, but unfortunately the day after it feels like I'm becoming so rigid again and it's so hard to grasp on to those emotions I was feeling during the trip. During the trip I remember thinking "our minds must wipe memory of this experience because how could someone experience this and not have their life completely and radically changed, why don't I see more people screaming this from the rooftops?". And now, the day after, I already find myself doubting my experience, trying to explain it away. Why? I want to live a life that is more open, free, and loving; but I don't understand how to integrate the experience I had into my life on a day to day basis, and how to not lose sight of the experience I had.

Edited by Moomalicious (08/12/26 01:56 PM)

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Re: How to integrate my psilocybin experience into my life? [Re: Moomalicious]
    #29645982 -

You worded it very well! I get images too of a tree-like network of interconnected nodes. And the realm where our true souls live is the realm of Eternity, where we always actually are (and the physical plane is an outward manifestation).


I recommend listening to lectures by Ram Dass. He talked a lot about the frustration of having peak spiritual experiences on psychedelics, but always coming down and being unable to maintain that supreme awareness. That’s what drove him to go to India to see if he could find anyone who could show him a more sustainable path. He nearly gave up, before serendipity brought him to Neem Karoli Baba, and afterward the practice/awareness of “guru kripa” became his primary path, for the rest of his life.


Personally, I like to take low doses of psychedelics fairly regularly, in addition to a regular spiritual practice that includes meditation, reading holy texts, some New Age literature, energy work like qigong. For daily life, the principle of “everything that happens to me is grist for the mill” has proved essential. To go all the way, nothing can be excluded from the embrace of the One.


--------------------
All communication
is pattern
and rhythm

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Re: How to integrate my psilocybin experience into my life? [Re: Blue Cthulhu]
    #29646037 -

:whathesaid:

That's great!  I would recommend going down the rabbit hole of non-duality.  Advaita Vedanta, Buddhism, Taoism, Christian Mysticism (not mainstream Christianity; that's rooted in dualism.  People like Meister Eckhart, Teresa of Avila, Thomas Merton, as well as many others you won't hear about in a traditional church; I've recently discovered a podcast called "The Tao of Christ", run by Marshall Davis.  He does a fantastic job of explaining non-duality across all spiritual traditions, but having been a pastor for 40 years, he does an especially good job at explaining the non-dual nature of Jesus' teachings.  He has an episode titled "Psychedelics and Nondual Awareness"; you could start with that one, considering you are fresh off of this experience). 

They are all pointing to the same thing, just from different angles.  It appears that what you experienced was a brief glimpse of non-duality.  The more you research it, the more rewarding it becomes, and the more you'll be able to integrate your experience into your life.  Don't doubt your experience or explain it away; seek to understand it more deeply.  Good luck on your journey!

Edited by OakTree (08/12/26 01:31 PM)

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Re: How to integrate my psilocybin experience into my life? [Re: Blue Cthulhu]
    #29646053 -

Thank you so much! I'm about 30 minutes in to one of his lectures and this is very helpful!

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Re: How to integrate my psilocybin experience into my life? [Re: OakTree]
    #29646055 -

Thank you so much for sharing a direction, I will explore all of this!

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Re: How to integrate my psilocybin experience into my life? [Re: Moomalicious]
    #29646186 -

I say just give it time and keep an open mind.  You’re integrating it right now whether you recognize it or not. 

Those sensations you experienced and memories you created will continue to worm their way into your conscious/subconscious for a long time.

And then take another dose when you get the “itch” :smile:


--------------------

When we constantly pull things apart trying to see how it works, we may end up with only an understanding of how to destroy something
- nick sand


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Re: How to integrate my psilocybin experience into my life? [Re: Moomalicious] * 1
    #29646239 -

Moomalicious said:
I had my first psilocybin trip and all felt right with the world! I have been on a long healing journey and I had no idea what to expect and did very little research on what the experience might be like, but I have just felt within myself that I  was finally ready to experience it. I felt absolute feelings of unity, sacredness, ultimate truth, unshakeable peace. I felt like I was meeting a living ... Thing? I don't know what to call it. Like a presence or just a state of being that was alive. Like we are all a part of a giant living tree, each of us tiny branches connected. It felt like there is a level of consciousness that I was not aware of before my trip. It felt like I was near the presence of those that have passed away, and that they are not really gone. I felt like I could see or sense other people's energy. It felt like everything we do in life is just an effort to express this part of us. Apologies if that makes little sense, it's very difficult to put it into words and wrap my head around.

It all felt like such a profound experience of love and insight, but unfortunately the day after it feels like I'm becoming so rigid again and it's so hard to grasp on to those emotions I was feeling during the trip. During the trip I remember thinking "our minds must wipe memory of this experience because how could someone experience this and not have their life completely and radically changed, why don't I see more people screaming this from the rooftops?". And now, the day after, I already find myself doubting my experience, trying to explain it away. Why? I want to live a life that is more open, free, and loving; but I don't understand how to integrate the experience I had into my life on a day to day basis, and how to not lose sight of the experience I had.


This is seriously like one of two intelligible trip reports I have read on this website. 

I am happy for you that you had such a profound experience. 

I think if you keep at it, you will find yourself in a much better place.

Good luck!

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Re: How to integrate my psilocybin experience into my life? [Re: Moomalicious]
    #29650114 -

Moomalicious said:
I had my first psilocybin trip and all felt right with the world! I have been on a long healing journey and I had no idea what to expect and did very little research on what the experience might be like, but I have just felt within myself that I  was finally ready to experience it. I felt absolute feelings of unity, sacredness, ultimate truth, unshakeable peace. I felt like I was meeting a living ... Thing? I don't know what to call it. Like a presence or just a state of being that was alive. Like we are all a part of a giant living tree, each of us tiny branches connected. It felt like there is a level of consciousness that I was not aware of before my trip. It felt like I was near the presence of those that have passed away, and that they are not really gone. I felt like I could see or sense other people's energy. It felt like everything we do in life is just an effort to express this part of us. Apologies if that makes little sense, it's very difficult to put it into words and wrap my head around.

It all felt like such a profound experience of love and insight, but unfortunately the day after it feels like I'm becoming so rigid again and it's so hard to grasp on to those emotions I was feeling during the trip. During the trip I remember thinking "our minds must wipe memory of this experience because how could someone experience this and not have their life completely and radically changed, why don't I see more people screaming this from the rooftops?". And now, the day after, I already find myself doubting my experience, trying to explain it away. Why? I want to live a life that is more open, free, and loving; but I don't understand how to integrate the experience I had into my life on a day to day basis, and how to not lose sight of the experience I had.


That's a gorgeous post, and reminded me when I first had my first real trip.  All of 'this' as your described is like water..and what happens when you try to grab and capture the water with your hand?  Well, it squeezes out of your hand doesn't it? And what happens when you wade out in the water and it gets too deep?  If you're used to being on land all the time, then your initial instinct to stand up, to try to find some footing.  But that's not how to move with water.  Instead you need to float, and to do that correctly, your body needs to flow with it, you need to breathe the right way, and so forth.

AS a few have mentioned, meditation is good.  Not to 'attain' a state of mind, but to bring about more awareness of your surroundings. Try your best not to go with a goal, but to just practice peace.  Go to a place that naturally relaxes you, and do your best to clear your mind.  Try to lesson the input of your thoughts, so you can pay more attention to your other senses.  What can you hear?  What can you smell?  How does the air feel on your skin. As you think less, you'll be surprised by how much you've been missing out on. This brings your mind and body from a place of living inside your head, to experiencing the world around you. It's a muscle that needs some love, and with more practice, the better you'll become.


--------------------
Annnnnnd I had a light saber and my friend was there and I said "you look like an indian" and he said "you look like satan" and he found a stick and a rock and he named the rock ooga booga and he named the stick Stick and we both thought that was pretty funny. We got eaten alive by mosquitos but didn't notice til the next day. I stepped on some glass while wading in the swamp and cut my foot open, didn't bother me til the next day either....yeah it was a good time, ended the night by buying some liquor for minors and drinking nips and going to he diner and eating chicken fingers, and then I went home and went to bed.

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Re: How to integrate my psilocybin experience into my life? [Re: Moomalicious]
    #29651556 -

It is a well written report about what it is like to experience pychedelic alteration of the basic way mind works moment to moment

normally:
changes in sensation -> become active mental content -> eliciting memory response while becoming new memory -> memory response mixes with changes in sensation in next mind moment while the previous active mental content fades away....

but on psychedelic:
the previous moment's active mental content does not fade away so quickly,
several moments of active mental content layer together producing the richness and perspective and altered ssense of time passing that cannot be felt directly when the psychedelic effect wears off.


--------------------
:brainfart: _ :finger:

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Re: How to integrate my psilocybin experience into my life? [Re: redgreenvines]
    #29651983 -

Thats great

Maybe write
Maybe write notes

Maybe write what you have to do

Maybe do self authoring by Jordan Peterson

Maybe write who said what


Youre a great guy glad youre having a great time


--------------------
Make love not war
And art
Save the planet
Fix the earth

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Re: How to integrate my psilocybin experience into my life? [Re: Ferdinando]
    #29656641 -

Good report. I have written on here a bunch about something I call "spiritual amnesia". It means that the insights you feel during visionary experiences are real understandings in that state of consciousness, but can't be translated into the ordinary state of consciousness. It just doesn't compute.

Some people claim they can live by the lessons, and maybe that's true, but for me... it's consistently wiped clean. I'm a perpetual Doubting Thomas. After the experience, I don't understand what was such a big deal, but during the experience, I remember again. This has been going on now for over a decade.

Don't let so-called "skeptics" (not really skeptics, more pseudo-skeptics) tell you they aren't real thoughts. I've considered that, and it's just fundamentally not the case. There absolutely is real understanding in these states. Real information. It just can't be translated.

For me, the real lesson has been that your mind filters information and constructs reality. What makes sense to you in one moment, may not make sense in another. Just because you can't "see" it now doesn't mean it's not there.

I mean, all sorts of animals hear different sounds and understand what it means, but our minds can't translate any of that either. When you change the frequency of your thinking, is it surprising that your consciousness can pick up new forms of understanding?

Needless to say, this is an extremely big deal.

This is a very nice way of looking at things also, because it forces me to be open minded and not rule anything out a priori. You don't know what you don't know. And even when you learned something, you might not have really learned it all the time.

The psychedelic experience is easily the greatest gift I've experienced in my life, and I agree with you when you say that you're confused why people don't "shout it from the rooftops". I'm a bit surprised people don't talk more about visionary experiences,... like, at all.

I mean, you would think at some point, someone would go "I was able to transcend my structuring of space/time, and do things my mind couldn't normally do", but we don't have that kind of interest in western society, at least. It's kind of just a weird quirk of human society, is what I've determined. We are more interested in just the football game or moving ahead in the rat race than talking about the nature of self and existence, and how absolutely freaking incredible it is. It's been weird to me for a very, very, very, very, very long time.

Existence is incredible -- I think you are just starting to crack open the nut.


--------------------
Chopin in Eternal Sonata: "I believe that I am somehow being tested. That I am on this journey to come to some realization. And in order to do so, I think I’m supposed to live my life to the fullest, even if it is in this muddled world of dream and reality."
Magic is FOR YOU. :mushroom2:

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Re: How to integrate my psilocybin experience into my life? [Re: solarshroomster]
    #29656724 -

I do that. "The world doesn't care about this."

It's taught, closing them down like that is a reflection of our fear. The truth is no less true for them than it is for you.

Everyone wants what you have whether they keep it in their awareness or not. You want what they have; they are your salvation, seeing them truly; they'd take it in a second if they had a peek.

That is a release, an opening; everyone wants it.

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Re: How to integrate my psilocybin experience into my life? [Re: syncro]
    #29656729 -

Our conundrum - an elder, an influence doesn't care about it. We are loyal to those we respect, so we clam up. "This is the way the world is."

Truth is that strong "elder" is not, but will cry like a baby seeing what you have, you seeing for them what they have.

The amnesia is our fear of their rejection of it. That is a way we reject it.

Edited by syncro (08/28/26 01:32 PM)

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Re: How to integrate my psilocybin experience into my life? [Re: syncro]
    #29656855 -

So the collective field resists our integration of these higher states, back into human form


--------------------
All communication
is pattern
and rhythm

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Re: How to integrate my psilocybin experience into my life? [Re: Blue Cthulhu]
    #29656980 -

There's said to be opposition, implying out there as well I guess. Sometimes I picture anti-yogi yogis, and all kinds of entities are mentioned, ghosts and up. They don't have much against a liberating means and vigilance. Same for our own anti-reason. Except for when not sometimes. Anyone who's set foot in the shroomery spiritual forum should not need fear, realm of endless merit.

Seriously with all the scripture and so on, testimony, from everywhere posted here, a lot. Om

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Re: How to integrate my psilocybin experience into my life? [Re: syncro]
    #29657828 -

The most simple function that is complete. I believe this is what true elders seek to give for minds. This one thing is complete, for liberation. Falling into that is the return of the gift while it manifests.

About spiritual battle, my mind resists, but I've come to increasing belief that the most powerful are like universal prayers for happiness and wellbeing.

The effects of successful spiritual war would be the happiness, health, sight of the auspicious, and nonsuffering of beings. Praying for that fruit may be the best nuke.

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Re: How to integrate my psilocybin experience into my life? [Re: syncro]
    #29658309 -

syncro said:
There's said to be opposition, implying out there as well I guess. Sometimes I picture anti-yogi yogis, and all kinds of entities are mentioned, ghosts and up. They don't have much against a liberating means and vigilance. Same for our own anti-reason. Except for when not sometimes.


Reminds me of Wetiko. These “adversaries” can actually be the means for awakening. They reveal our own blind spots , how gracious of them!


--------------------
All communication
is pattern
and rhythm

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Re: How to integrate my psilocybin experience into my life? [Re: Blue Cthulhu]
    #29658349 -

I like the description of wetiko as in the dark psyche and iirc associated with alchemy, but the source is unidentifiable - so that led to the same nature of wisdom; 'looked for, and it can't be seen...' They are in the same place of purpose. The darkness becomes mahamudra. Phenomena become as light. War turns to peace.

I have doubt. Yesterday I was stuck in the thought that the only purpose for creation is war. It is sourced in the split. But it wouldn't be correct in the books or testimony. Our creation goes beyond gravity.

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Re: How to integrate my psilocybin experience into my life? [Re: syncro]
    #29658362 -

However apparently it depends on where dimensionally, karmically.

"Uncanny visions arise in my mind: of timeless evil, and a battle older than the earth, which has been fought before on countless worlds, in forgotten ages. Even after this battle of Lanka, the war shall be fought again and again; until time ends, and dharma and adharma with it." -Rama

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Re: How to integrate my psilocybin experience into my life? [Re: syncro]
    #29658433 -

From following commentary, "Having arrived on the shores of Lanka, Rama speaks these words to Lakshmana as if in a trance. Rama is alluding to his great destiny: to eradicate the evil of the age. This passage also emphasizes the deep and cyclical nature of time in Hindu cosmology; over long ages, events tend to repeat themselves."

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