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I was once deeply in love with a girl, but she only wanted to be friends. We manage to have somewhat of a relationship for a while, but she broke it off and we went back to being friends, except that I still had these feelings for her. Eventually, those feelings ended up destroying our friendship, and it's now been almost a year since I last heard from her. For a while I thought I was over her, but lately I can't stop thinking about her. My memories of her just keep coming back to haunt me. I'm still madly in love with her to this day, and I just can't seem to put her behind me. She meant more to me than I can possibly describe, and just wish I could get some closure. I want to find out why she won't talk to me. But I can't. Any attempts I've made to contact her have been futile. It's clear to me by now that she doesn't want to hear from me, so I stopped trying long ago. But I just can't rest easy until I know why she just gave up on our friendship and refuses to talk to me.
"It is dangerous to be right when the government is wrong."--Voltaire
The trick is to fall in love with someone else. But that won't happen if you're trying to do that... I don't know what the fuck to do.
If you find an easy solution call me.
-------------------- "I have no valid complaint against hustlers. No rational bitch. But the act of selling is repulsive to me. I harbor a secret urge to whack a salesman in the face, crack his teeth and put red bumps around his eyes." -Hunter S Thompson
I know why she is totally ignoring you-cutting you off. I have a lot of girlfriends that talk to me about girl talk and why they do what they do. Anyways, your friend/girlfriend realized that you still had romantic feelings for her even after you decided to "only be friends" She thinks the only solution to you getting over her is to just totally avoid contact so it would be easier to forget. This is true....it would be a lot harder to be friends with her and watch her get together with other guys in front of your face while the love you had still continued to grow. This is a normal act for girls to do in your situation. Trust me...it is so hard to ever be friends again if you decide to be a couple then break up. You can adrress her about it but chances are you probally dont want to for your own good if you are still madly in love with her. Once you are ready to just be friends...chances are she will sense that next time you talk and then your guys friendship will continue.
I feel your angst. I too had a similar relationship with a girl, though probably more pathetic. I never convinced myself that she would actually want to go out with me,(the funny thing is that I was convinced that it was because of my small stature) we had a very wierd but exciting relationship, we were very open about our feelings and at times reached the point of annoyance for one another (mostly her being annoyed by me) but I just could'nt help it, I still think she's the most beautiful girl I've ever had the pleasure to know. The last day of high school she wrote a very heartfelt and creative letter/collage in my yearbook that I still cherish to this day. I miss her sooo much and havn't talked to her in more than a year, though I occasionally speak to one of her close friends. It's hard, and maybe I'll never truly and completely get over her, I just have a hard time thinking about her and the guys/bf's she's with and hope she's happy, for that's all I can do now. Someday I hope to ask her on one official date to make up for all that time, but till then I can only dream of those few memorable days we spent together as friends.
-------------------- Wee, sleeket, cowran, tim'rous beastie,
O, what panic's in thy breastie!
Thou need na start awa sae hasty,
Wi' bickering brattle!