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my self esteem is its lowest its ever been in my life ; (
    #16787710 -

Technically I have a good enough life. I'm not in deep shit or suffering from a brutal addiction.


I have no motivation, everything is always too complicated, every time there's a minor speed bump, I give up and walk away. I can't seem to be able to put effort in anything. Instead of seeing fun and potential or whatever, I pathologically always see the negatives in things.

I've have pissed away 3 years of my life doing fuck all. I tried applying to like 4 jobs in 3 years. all minimum salary. I ended up getting one but I quit after less than a week because I had anxiety issues.

I thought of going back to school for the fall semester but when I got to the university and saw a long line at the registrar office and decided to just give up cause there was too many people.

I always ask myself what I'll do with my life and I can never find the answer

Its stupid cause I know its as easy as getting a job... But for some reason its isn't easy like that for me, even though I know that it should be.

I have lost all sense of self worth to a point where I just constantly put myself down to get pity from others.

Is there anyone that can relate? How did you get out of it? I can't seem to find the way out.

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Re: my self esteem is its lowest its ever been in my life ; ( [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #16788132 -

No replies :frown:

Too much ranting I guess?

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Re: my self esteem is its lowest its ever been in my life ; ( [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #16788195 -

Theres really nothing to say you know what you have to do. As cliche as this sounds life is what you make of it if you see negatives in everything then your life will be negative. However if you embrace positive thinking I guarantee your life will turn around and allow you to reach your full potential. Also I would quit weed if I were you smoking it made me depressed and useless after long term use. Good luck man :sun:

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Re: my self esteem is its lowest its ever been in my life ; ( [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #16788250 -

I'm willing to try anything at this point man.

I can't continue that way

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Re: my self esteem is its lowest its ever been in my life ; ( [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #16788332 -

Fortunately your problem is really easy to fix. All you have to do is get a job. Stop pitying yourself and just do it. You know what you need to do.

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Re: my self esteem is its lowest its ever been in my life ; ( [Re: Anonymous #3]
    #16790275 -

:feelsbatman:

I'm in the same situation. I've had jobs and still felt the same :shrug:

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Re: my self esteem is its lowest its ever been in my life ; ( [Re: Anonymous #4]
    #16790650 -

Wow, what a self defeating attitude.
You need to do something, anything other than sit around feeding your depression.
Go Out Side. Walk around the block, anybody can do that, you'll feel great for accomplishing something.
Happiness is attainable if you reach out and grab it.

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Re: my self esteem is its lowest its ever been in my life ; ( [Re: Anonymous #5]
    #16791192 -

Congratulations!
Today is your day.
You're off to Great Places!
You're off and away!

You have brains in your head.
You have feet in your shoes.
You can steer yourself
any direction you choose.
You're on your own. And you know what you know.
And YOU are the guy who'll decide where to go.

You'll look up and down streets. Look 'em over with care.
About some you will say, "I don't choose to go there."
With your head full of brains and your shoes full of feet,
you're too smart to go down any not-so-good street.

And you may not find any
you'll want to go down.
In that case, of course,
you'll head straight out of town.

It's opener there
in the wide open air.

Out there things can happen
and frequently do
to people as brainy
and footsy as you.

And then things start to happen,
don't worry. Don't stew.
Just go right along.
You'll start happening too.

OH!
THE PLACES YOU'LL GO!

You'll be on y our way up!
You'll be seeing great sights!
You'll join the high fliers
who soar to high heights.

You won't lag behind, because you'll have the speed.
You'll pass the whole gang and you'll soon take the lead.
Wherever you fly, you'll be best of the best.
Wherever you go, you will top all the rest.

Except when you don't.
Because, sometimes, you won't.

I'm sorry to say so
but, sadly, it's true
that Bang-ups
and Hang-ups
can happen to you.

You can get all hung up
in a prickle-ly perch.
And your gang will fly on.
You'll be left in a Lurch.

You'll come down from the Lurch
with an unpleasant bump.
And the chances are, then,
that you'll be in a Slump.

And when you're in a Slump,
you're not in for much fun.
Un-slumping yourself
is not easily done.

You will come to a place where the streets are not marked.
Some windows are lighted. But mostly they're darked.
A place you could sprain both your elbow and chin!
Do you dare to stay out? Do you dare to go in?
How much can you lose? How much can you win?

And IF you go in, should you turn left or right...
or right-and-three-quarters? Or, maybe, not quite?
Or go around back and sneak in from behind?
Simple it's not, I'm afraid you will find,
for a mind-maker-upper to make up his mind.

You can get so confused
that you'll start in to race
down long wiggled roads at a break-necking pace
and grind on for miles cross weirdish wild space,
headed, I fear, toward a most useless place.
The Waiting Place...

...for people just waiting.
Waiting for a train to go
or a bus to come, or a plane to go
or the mail to come, or the rain to go
or the phone to ring, or the snow to snow
or the waiting around for a Yes or No
or waiting for their hair to grow.
Everyone is just waiting.

Waiting for the fish to bite
or waiting for the wind to fly a kite
or waiting around for Friday night
or waiting, perhaps, for their Uncle Jake
or a pot to boil, or a Better Break
or a string of pearls, or a pair of pants
or a wig with curls, or Another Chance.
Everyone is just waiting.

NO!
That's not for you!

Somehow you'll escape
all that waiting and staying
You'll find the bright places
where Boom Bands are playing.

With banner flip-flapping,
once more you'll ride high!
Ready for anything under the sky.
Ready because you're that kind of a guy!

Oh, the places you'll go! There is fun to be done!
There are points to be scored. There are games to be won.
And the magical things you can do with that ball
will make you the winning-est winner of all.
Fame! You'll be as famous as famous can be,
with the whole wide world watching you win on TV.

Except when they don't
Because, sometimes they won't.

I'm afraid that some times
you'll play lonely games too.
Games you can't win
'cause you'll play against you.

All Alone!
Whether you like it or not,
Alone will be something
you'll be quite a lot.

And when you're alone, there's a very good chance
you'll meet things that scare you right out of your pants.
There are some, down the road between hither and yon,
that can scare you so much you won't want to go on.

But on you will go
though the weather be foul.
On you will go
though your enemies prowl.
On you will go
though the Hakken-Kraks howl.
Onward up many
a frightening creek,
though your arms may get sore
and your sneakers may leak.

On and on you will hike,
And I know you'll hike far
and face up to your problems
whatever they are.

You'll get mixed up, of course,
as you already know.
You'll get mixed up
with many strange birds as you go.
So be sure when you step.
Step with care and great tact
and remember that Life's
a Great Balancing Act.
Just never foget to be dexterous and deft.
And never mix up your right foot with your left.

And will you succeed?
Yes! You will, indeed!
(98 and 3/4 percent guaranteed.)

KID, YOU'LL MOVE MOUNTAINS!

So...
be your name Buxbaum or Bixby or Bray
or Mordecai Ali Van Allen O'Shea,
You're off the Great Places!
Today is your day!
Your mountain is waiting.
So...get on your way!

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Re: my self esteem is its lowest its ever been in my life ; ( [Re: Anonymous #5]
    #16791366 -

Anonymous #5 said:
Wow, what a self defeating attitude.




Exactly the words I should have written.

I seem to do this unconsciously. It seems ingrained in me to be like this. It seems to always be the first thing that comes to mind.

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Re: my self esteem is its lowest its ever been in my life ; ( [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #16791455 -

Anonymous #1 said:
Anonymous #5 said:
Wow, what a self defeating attitude.




Exactly the words I should have written.

I seem to do this unconsciously. It seems ingrained in me to be like this. It seems to always be the first thing that comes to mind.



Thats because you've come to accept it as reality and have stayed in this mind state of self defeat for too long. To get out of this rump you need to force yourself to do what you want to do. FUCK that voice that says I can't do it. You will realize if you go for it sure you may be turned down but sooner or later you'll get what you want and also have different experiences.

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Re: my self esteem is its lowest its ever been in my life ; ( [Re: Anonymous #7]
    #16791488 -

Anonymous #7 said:
Anonymous #1 said:
Anonymous #5 said:
Wow, what a self defeating attitude.




Exactly the words I should have written.

I seem to do this unconsciously. It seems ingrained in me to be like this. It seems to always be the first thing that comes to mind.



Thats because you've come to accept it as reality and have stayed in this mind state of self defeat for too long. To get out of this rump you need to force yourself to do what you want to do. FUCK that voice that says I can't do it. You will realize if you go for it sure you may be turned down but sooner or later you'll get what you want and also have different experiences.



Thats good advice. I'll give it a shot.

I'm tired of living in the place Im in right now.

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