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something i noticed about friendships with women
    #9175558 -

I have always been under the impression, based on many people saying so, is that to have a succesful relationship, the person you are dating has to be a friend.


So often I see women, usually its the stupid stuck up lovestruck bitches that actually deserve it, end up with a guy, and you look at their relationship and say "why are they in a relationship together at all?" By that I mean they are just overall stuck up bitchy women who find a guy willing to put up with it just enough to get what they want out of the relationship, and the guys are always the kind of guys who are clearly just going through the motions making themselves look like "they really care about and identify with her"

This is not to say that good women dont end up in relationships which turn sour or they dont get the respect they deserve, but typically thats more along the lines of simply a soured relationship, based on his (or even hers) shortcomings or incompatibilities, than the type of sleazy guy who preys on the stupidity of some women.

The main problem with me is that if i find a girl who is both attractive (to me) and someone i feel is worthy based on other things, she ends up friends, or i am in the friend zone. Not necessarily because SHE puts me there, but because i put myself there. I don't want to be a sleaze, or worse, give her the impression that i only care about her friendship because i want "something more"

ironically, we as guys and girls,  end up typically with someone we just met, havent known that long, and havent had the time to form a friendship that we fear of screwing up.

I wonder if women ever sit back and say "i would like to date him, hes great, but we are too good of friends, and i cant ruin that, or maybe he doesnt like me, etc"


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This section of the signature line has been intentionally left blank.

Remember to always courtesy flush

  we could all use a little more sunshine.

:shrug: yeah, she's funny and somewhat interesting.  not a beauty queen, but not bad lookin.  i'd feel quite honored to fuck janine garofalo. -tiny_rabid_birds

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Re: something i noticed about friendships with women [Re: Cannabischarlie] * 1
    #9175574 -

Yeah, they probably sit back and say that.


On the bright side of things, women are better friends than guys. They listen when you talk, have (or at least show) genuine concern, are rational ~26 days of the month, are always there when you need something... list goes on.

I see those fake relationships all the time on campus and it disgusts and astounds me at the same time. I try not to figure it out. I usually just feel bad for one party or both.

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Re: something i noticed about friendships with women [Re: Adden]
    #9175623 -

I get the best of both worlds with the "friends with benefits" relationships. These are women who I really *click* with, and neither one of us wants to fuck that up. So instead of having a "relationship" we stay friends and fool around every so often.

However, let me say that this type of relationship is not for everyone. If you are at all jealous, it won't work out. My "friends" know that I have other "friends" and are fine with it as long as I use protection, and vice versa.

Works great for me, anyhow.:shrug:


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"Its moving of its own accord...and I like that in a shirt!" - Me, tripping.

deCypher said:
Schizophrenia beats dining alone, you know.

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Re: something i noticed about friendships with women [Re: Cannabischarlie]
    #9175947 -

I do that all the time. I've had several friendships with guys who I would have loved to have had something more with, but wouldn't risk ruining the friendship that we had over getting into a relationship.

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Re: something i noticed about friendships with women [Re: Ima Trooper]
    #9178687 -

Ima Trooper said:
I get the best of both worlds with the "friends with benefits" relationships. 


do you get dental?


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This section of the signature line has been intentionally left blank.

Remember to always courtesy flush

  we could all use a little more sunshine.

:shrug: yeah, she's funny and somewhat interesting.  not a beauty queen, but not bad lookin.  i'd feel quite honored to fuck janine garofalo. -tiny_rabid_birds

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Re: something i noticed about friendships with women [Re: Cannabischarlie]
    #9178716 -

I'm a girl for the record, and I'd like to just say I'm not one of those people who says "I don't want to ruin this friendship."


Personally, I think amazing love is way, way, way worth the risk.


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People like us, who believe in physics, know that the distinction between past, present, and future is only a stubbornly persistent illusion. --Albert Einstein

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Re: something i noticed about friendships with women [Re: Ratci]
    #9178768 -

i find it diffucult to have legitimate friendships with most girls. this is gonna sound shallow, but honestly, most girls ive been able to be friends with are physically unattractive to me. most of the attractive girls ive befriended have either wanted to date me, and so the friendship got weird, or we have hooked up, and either the friendship got weird, or we dated.

maybe im just a douche and let my cock do my thinking for me...

ive always thought the best relationship would start out as a friendship, but in my experience its always been hard to separate the physical side of the relationship once there is mutual attraction.


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Tempul

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Re: something i noticed about friendships with women [Re: Ima Trooper]
    #9178780 -

Ima Trooper said:
I get the best of both worlds with the "friends with benefits" relationships. These are women who I really *click* with, and neither one of us wants to fuck that up. So instead of having a "relationship" we stay friends and fool around every so often.



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now i hear the police comin after me

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Re: something i noticed about friendships with women [Re: doitagain]
    #9178827 -

"friends with benefits" has NEVER worked for me. the girl has gotten attached every single damn time. they tell me they wont get attached, but its happened every time. i dont think its as easy for women to separate themselves from sex. they try, but they are just much more emotional (which is a good thing, especially come time for the serious, loving relationship).


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Tempul

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Re: something i noticed about friendships with women [Re: fischwrap]
    #9178843 -

fischwrap said:
"friends with benefits" has NEVER worked for me. the girl has gotten attached every single damn time. 


That's just 'cause you're too awesome, man. Be less awesome!


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Formula: 0

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Re: something i noticed about friendships with women [Re: fischwrap]
    #9179116 -

fischwrap said:
"friends with benefits" has NEVER worked for me. the girl has gotten attached every single damn time. they tell me they wont get attached, but its happened every time. i dont think its as easy for women to separate themselves from sex. they try, but they are just much more emotional (which is a good thing, especially come time for the serious, loving relationship).


well my current friend with benefits happens to be engaged, or at least thinks she is.  (she has a ring, but she takes it off when we get busy.)


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now i hear the police comin after me

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Re: something i noticed about friendships with women [Re: doitagain]
    #9179201 -

Now that's just wrong!

(On her part. You're in the clear.)


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Formula: 0

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Re: something i noticed about friendships with women [Re: fischwrap]
    #9179266 -

fischwrap said:
"friends with benefits" has NEVER worked for me. the girl has gotten attached every single damn time. they tell me they wont get attached, but its happened every time. i dont think its as easy for women to separate themselves from sex. they try, but they are just much more emotional (which is a good thing, especially come time for the serious, loving relationship).


QFT

This same scenario has happened to me with the last 2 girls I've been with. I'm a really sensitive guy and try to avoid being a dick unlike some other dudes I know, but when I lay out the ground rules "I don't want a relationship, I just got out of a really long one, I just enjoy being with you, etc., etc." shit never goes as planned.

Nothing kills a boner like the words, "So what do you think we should call this?" :suicide:

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Re: something i noticed about friendships with women [Re: Zodiak]
    #9179357 -

Before we end up having sex for the first time, I sit them down and tell them:

"Ok, look. I don't like relationships. I'm not interested in a relationship with anyone. I just want to have a good time, and you're hot as hell.

I don't mind at all if you have fun with other guys, as long as you use protection, and I want to be free to meet new people as well. I don't really want to know about your other guys, all I ask is that you let me know if you get to drinking or something and don't use protection. Go get tested, and we'll continue having fun.:shrug:

If you don't want to do that, then we'll just be friends."

I haven't had a bad one yet.:grin:


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"Its moving of its own accord...and I like that in a shirt!" - Me, tripping.

deCypher said:
Schizophrenia beats dining alone, you know.

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