Sinbad said:

No, I don't think it is fixable, she obviously is not so 'perfect' for you IMO. Find someone more on your wavelength spiritually, is my suggestion. Last thing it sounds like you need is a fundie xtian wife/gf.

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Sinbad said:

Obviously you have not had much experience with fundamental xtianity. I've had a few girlfriends who have had that affliction, and believe, whatever else is right about the relationship, fundamental xtianity is such that the brainwashing and co-dependency issues are more vast and numerous than you can imagine.

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Obviously you do not realize that every human being is a unique individual who is presently who they are due to their unique situation, and your continual reference to some generalized, limited, preconceived notion evidences that you simply do not know the woman he is referring to, and, instead of investing effort into building an actual understanding as to who she is and the nature of this circumstance, you'd rather influence the perspective of someone who is evaluating how to make profound decisions as to who they wish to be, directly influencing the life that another human being will lead as well, by referring to vauge, meaningless generalizations as though it actually pertained to his specific situation. Its clumsy and its detrimental.

Tit for tat.

Quote:

When people fall in love, it always feels like 'soulmates'. The nature of reality has nothing whatsoever to do with romantic conceptions and rose tinted glasses. When it comes down to relationships passing the 'test of time' it is near 100% about compatibility of views IMO, i.e the honeymoon period only lasts so long.

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Which brings us to this thread, eh?

What you seem to be proposing is that he should discard what he has described as an amazing experience of love within a relationship because there are present obstructions that prevent them from continuing to share that experience. Clearly they are both not ready for continuing their relationship and immersing themselves in an infinitely rewarding love for each other, as she has misknowledge concerning his usage of mushrooms and will not involve herself with him if he does, and he seems to have an interest in fucking other women like animals.

Trepiodge said:

Sinbad said:

No, I don't think it is fixable, she obviously is not so 'perfect' for you IMO. Find someone more on your wavelength spiritually, is my suggestion. Last thing it sounds like you need is a fundie xtian wife/gf.

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You are perfectly correct. I waited till I was 31 to marry the right woman and it paid off. I have never suffered fools gladly, I refuse to suppress who I am and I refuse to give up the use of reason when examining my currently held assumptions. Why should you want to deal with someone who will not fully accept who you are and is possessed of a dogmatic mode of thinking?

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lolwhut said:

Well, to be honest, it just got old, and I think i respected her too much to be the sexual deviant i really am.  I think i have came on her face once and that was here recently.  But the things I do with these other girls is just ridiculous.  I facefuck them, if they throw up i make them keep going, I spit in their mouths while they suck my dick, i pull out while im fucking them and come inside their mouth and make them swallow, ass slapping, and eventually, with this one chick im going to blindfold her, handcuff her arms behind her back, and just violate her entire body.

I think i respect my current girlfriend way too much to do alot of that stuff to her :/

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If this is truly an aspect of who you are and you feel that it needs to be fufilled, how have you approached the matter with her? What brings you to assume that she wouldn't like to get wild herself? For whatever reason, you are seeking this fufillment from sources other than her, and I'm curious as to what effort you've invested into exploring the matter out with her.

You say you respect her enough to not do those things with her, but do you respect her enough to do those things with her? Part of me wonders if you judge yourself in a negative manner for fucking like that...

Sinbad said:

Indeed. Love can sometimes blind us to the obvious facts that are right in front of us.

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fireworks_god said:

Sinbad said:

Indeed. Love can sometimes blind us to the obvious facts that are right in front of us.

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You've got it backwards there.

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fireworks_god said:

lolwhut said:

Well, to be honest, it just got old, and I think i respected her too much to be the sexual deviant i really am.  I think i have came on her face once and that was here recently.  But the things I do with these other girls is just ridiculous.  I facefuck them, if they throw up i make them keep going, I spit in their mouths while they suck my dick, i pull out while im fucking them and come inside their mouth and make them swallow, ass slapping, and eventually, with this one chick im going to blindfold her, handcuff her arms behind her back, and just violate her entire body.

I think i respect my current girlfriend way too much to do alot of that stuff to her :/

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If this is truly an aspect of who you are and you feel that it needs to be fufilled, how have you approached the matter with her? What brings you to assume that she wouldn't like to get wild herself? For whatever reason, you are seeking this fufillment from sources other than her, and I'm curious as to what effort you've invested into exploring the matter out with her.

You say you respect her enough to not do those things with her, but do you respect her enough to do those things with her? Part of me wonders if you judge yourself in a negative manner for fucking like that...

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fireworks_god said:

Sinbad said:

Obviously you have not had much experience with fundamental xtianity. I've had a few girlfriends who have had that affliction, and believe, whatever else is right about the relationship, fundamental xtianity is such that the brainwashing and co-dependency issues are more vast and numerous than you can imagine.

---

Obviously you do not realize that every human being is a unique individual who is presently who they are due to their unique situation, and your continual reference to some generalized, limited, preconceived notion evidences that you simply do not know the woman he is referring to, and, instead of investing effort into building an actual understanding as to who she is and the nature of this circumstance, you'd rather influence the perspective of someone who is evaluating how to make profound decisions as to who they wish to be, directly influencing the life that another human being will lead as well, by referring to vauge, meaningless generalizations as though it actually pertained to his specific situation. Its clumsy and its detrimental.

Tit for tat.

Quote:

When people fall in love, it always feels like 'soulmates'. The nature of reality has nothing whatsoever to do with romantic conceptions and rose tinted glasses. When it comes down to relationships passing the 'test of time' it is near 100% about compatibility of views IMO, i.e the honeymoon period only lasts so long.

---

Which brings us to this thread, eh?

What you seem to be proposing is that he should discard what he has described as an amazing experience of love within a relationship because there are present obstructions that prevent them from continuing to share that experience. Clearly they are both not ready for continuing their relationship and immersing themselves in an infinitely rewarding love for each other, as she has misknowledge concerning his usage of mushrooms and will not involve herself with him if he does, and he seems to have an interest in fucking other women like animals.

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fireworks_god said:

No, the phrase "fundamentalist Christian" contains no meaning. If you could point me in the direction of precisely what has been presented regarding her that makes her a "fundamental Christian", I would love to hear it. 

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He in fact stated in his initial post that she was a 'fundamentalist christian'. Since he is in a relationship with her, I assumed that he would know that about her. As for the phrase having no meaning, perhaps you might spend a little time researching the meaning of the phrase on google.

Sinbad said:

All I proposed was that, in the long run, a relationship between a funde xtian and an atheist is almost certainly not viable, as the differences in worldview is immense.

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There's always an exception to the rule, and thinking through clumsy, preconceived notions of how things "are" regarding two unique individuals is detrimental, because it belies their very nature as human beings. It could potentially be the most viable relationship ever. The opportunity exists, but when individuals make statements like "No, I don't think it is fixable, she obviously is not so 'perfect' for you IMO. Find someone more on your wavelength spiritually, is my suggestion. Last thing it sounds like you need is a fundie xtian wife/gf. ", without displaying any interest in seeking an actual understanding of the two individuals involved, as well as the specifics of their situation, that opportunity begins to dissipate.

Quote:

For the time being, he can certainly enjoy 'immersing himself in the love' for as long as it lasts,

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Quote:

but believe me, this honeymoon phase does indeed wear off. If I were him, I would get out as soon as marriage became a topic of discussion in the relationship. 

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Well, you aren't him, and simply handing down judgement instead of seeking and providing understanding isn't of any assistance when "this honeymoon stage" wears off. To think that sharing an incredible experience of love some day wears off, and then two must struggle to overcome differences, is a scary, baseless thought. I'd rather consciously experience that love and work out differences, together, if they arise.

lolwhut said:

fucking other women like animals, i couldn't have said it better myself.

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I bet your woman would love it. I would imagine that it would mean so much more, considering what all you share.

Sinbad said:

He in fact stated in his initial post that she was a 'fundamentalist christian'. Since he is in a relationship with her, I assumed that he would know that about her.

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In my opinion, it is a brazen assumption, no different than her views on his mushroom usage.

Once again, asking questions and building an understanding of the actuality of a situation is always more effective than making baseless assumptions and handing down final judgment on a phenomenon that is totally beyond one's understanding - the relationship of two human beings.

Quote:

As for the phrase having no meaning, perhaps you might spend a little time researching the meaning of the phrase on google.

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The word "bazunk" has meaning too; yet, in application to the specific nature of an individual, the phrase has no meaning, no relevance, and it is counterproductive.

fireworks_god said:

Sinbad said:

All I proposed was that, in the long run, a relationship between a funde xtian and an atheist is almost certainly not viable, as the differences in worldview is immense.

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There's always an exception to the rule, and thinking through clumsy, preconceived notions of how things "are" regarding two unique individuals is detrimental, because it belies their very nature as human beings. It could potentially be the most viable relationship ever. The opportunity exists, but when individuals make statements like "No, I don't think it is fixable, she obviously is not so 'perfect' for you IMO. Find someone more on your wavelength spiritually, is my suggestion. Last thing it sounds like you need is a fundie xtian wife/gf. ", without displaying any interest in seeking an actual understanding of the two individuals involved, as well as the specifics of their situation, that opportunity begins to dissipate.

Quote:

For the time being, he can certainly enjoy 'immersing himself in the love' for as long as it lasts,

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It will always last. What they shared has vibrated within their beings and changed them as individuals forever. They may or may not decide to pursue an intimate relationship with each other, but to remain consciously aware of the love that they share within their being, as they are facing opportunities that could or could not propel them even further into each other's arms, is the only way to be. It isn't a question of enjoyment, it is a question of not feeling seperated from the individual that one is trying to work with so that they can transcend, together, obstructions that would seperate them.

Quote:

but believe me, this honeymoon phase does indeed wear off. If I were him, I would get out as soon as marriage became a topic of discussion in the relationship. 

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Well, you aren't him, and simply handing down judgement instead of seeking and providing understanding isn't of any assistance when "this honeymoon stage" wears off. To think that sharing an incredible experience of love some day wears off, and then two must struggle to overcome differences is a scary thought. I'd rather consciously experience that love and work out differences, together, if they arise.

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fireworks_god said:

Sinbad said:

He in fact stated in his initial post that she was a 'fundamentalist christian'. Since he is in a relationship with her, I assumed that he would know that about her.

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In my opinion, it is a brazen assumption, no different than her views on his mushroom usage.

Once again, asking questions and building an understanding of the actuality of a situation is always more effective than making baseless assumptions and handing down final judgment on a phenomenon that is totally beyond one's understanding - the relationship of two human beings.

Quote:

As for the phrase having no meaning, perhaps you might spend a little time researching the meaning of the phrase on google.

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The word "bazunk" has meaning too; yet, in application to the specific nature of an individual, the phrase has no meaning, no relevance, and it is counterproductive.

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Sinbad said:

I wish I had the time and energy to respond fully to your post, but the fact is, I probably don't have as much time to waste as you.

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Yes, giving advice to someone who requests it and fully discussing ideas that have far-reaching implications is a waste of time.

Quote:

He asked for opinions, and i gave my opinion, that has been educated through personal experience with fundamentalist xtians and relationships specifically.

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Quote:

Like i said about love before, it seems that you are in the midst of a relationship where you feel that not feeling separate is a very good thing because of the sense of oneess and totality that you get from that state of mind.

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Quote:

This is precisely what I meant by love blinding one into thinking that there is only one dimension, and not two.

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Quote:

When the rose tinted glasses fall off, in fact we discover that there was always two dimensions, and not one, like we believed previously.

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Sorry, but these "rose tinted glasses" don't just "fall off". Obstructions within oneself and one's relationship arise, and the obstruction that the original poster has proposed is a prime example of this happening. It isn't as though love is some kind of fever that one day disappears and reality remains. Human beings place conditions upon their experience of love and their sharing it within a relationship (which is a framework by which love is focused and intensified within reality), which is evidenced by her statement that "if you use mushrooms, I cannot be with you, we cannot share this". These "rose tinted glasses" (stupid phrase ) don't just fall off. We discover the amazing nature of reality and then we ourselves decide that we will not experience it any longer, out of our own ignorance.

Quote:

Then we see all of the persons characteristics more clearly, and in the case of a fundamentalist xiatian, in most cases, this is not a very pretty discovery, especially if the atheist concerned is already married and has kids with them!

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We always see all of the other's characteristics clearly, provided that our eyes are open. Love has an amazing quality, in that it brings one to amplify the characteristics of another that most represent the true nature of that individual, and this interaction occurs and it changes all involved, giving positive reinforcement to these characteristics, which are manifestations of one's higher self.

Once an aspect of ourselves obstructs the sharing of this experience within a relationship, such as the one illustrated in this thread, one enters a state of mind in which one focuses upon everything that is separated within one's relationship. From such a state of mind, how is it then possible to share that amazing experience of love? It's like like placing a resistor in an electrical current. Either the current is deemed interrupted and the individuals go their separate ways, which is the advice that your handed down, without seeking any further, specific understanding of the situation, or the individual makes the conscious decision to experience that love within themselves, and open up a pathway for open communication, an approach to work together to find a means through which either that resistor can be transcended, or a manner in which the relationship can still exist in an amazing, loving way. Imagine an old couple, married for thirty years, and the wife positively hates the fact that her husband smokes cigars. He still smokes them, but he smokes them outside, and she won't kiss him until his mouth no longer tastes like them. Does the fact that he smokes a cigar necessitate that they cannot have an amazing, wonderful relationship, totally immersed in love? I think not, they compromised, and, of course, through communication, comes understanding, and through understanding, those resistors naturally tend to be transcended anyways.

So what if one of them is a Christian (I have seen no evidence thus far that suggests she is "fundamentalist"), and one is atheist? Your rules do not apply.

Quote:

I now have to go chase up some money problems.

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Well, money never comes to us. I have to go to it in about two hours. If only I got paid to do this, and now I don't even get points for doing it any more because people were too selfish.

Sinbad said:

Maybe for you it is best, but actually I have a lot of experience with the very issues that he has brought up. Fundamentalist xtianity, in all its forms, is an ugly animal. I think you lack some experience and knowledge of fundamentalist xtianity, which is why you need to dig for more information on this topic.

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Assert your experience and question mine, but I haven't seen any evidence of either. This thread is not about "fundamentalist christianity", it is about the relationship of the original poster and his woman. The phrase does not even have any relevance in this discussion, and yet you are utilizing its utterance in reference to her as a means of handing down some mighty, brazen judgment. If you do not seek to understand the actuality of the situation, you have no grounds upon which to place a relevant judgment, and any such judgment is detrimental, as it not rooted in understanding, but ignorance.

The woman he describes sounds like a very beautiful and amazing person, and unskillfully using this term belies all of that. I personally prefer to think through and utilize understanding that can be derived through communication, as opposed to assuming I already know, by way of employing brazen assumptions and preconceived notions.