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Unfolding Nature Shop: Unfolding Nature: Being in the Implicate Order

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Monogamy and Polygamy as valid but different paths.
    #5670772 -

If you are monogamous the sexual act is about realizing that you and your partner are the same exact person, and about removing any and all barriers so that the two become one.

It is hard for many people in the modern world to do this, because they are not taught how to meditate, how to focus chi, how to love. How to transcend their own ego and dissolve it into someone else.

Polygamy (by which I mean people cheating on each other, loose sex, etc) is based much more around the sex act. It is about gratification and is a natural path to take to ensure procreation of the species.

It is not particularly about transcendence, although it may be feasible that an illuminated one can merge egos with every person he has sex with in order to heal them. The catch is they cannot merge egos with him and only reap what benefit they are already open to receiving.

Monogamy is about being the other person and opening them up to becoming you.

What do you all think? In a world where both exist we cannot claim absolutes that one or the other is the wrong path. Monogamy seems to be in order with higher levels of consciousness and more relevant to trancsending human "limations" (or realizing human potential) whereas polygamy and the desire to commit infedlities seems to arise from the outdated drives of survival and lower chakra conscoiusness which we are currently shedding.


--------------------
I am the MacDaddy of Heimlich County, I play it Straight Up Yo!

....I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm, to feel connected enough to step aside and weep like a widow, to feel inspired, to fathom the power, to witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain, to swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human......
Om Namah Shivaya, I tell you What!

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Re: Monogamy and Polygamy as valid but different paths. [Re: leery11]
    #5670874 -

I can't choose for others, but for myself I choose monogamy. 

I know a lot of orgy people and swinger people, but its not really my scene.  It sucks though, cuz I've lost some good friends to that scene. 

But I have a hard time trying to see polygamists as 'spiritually enlightened' people.  I know that they exist, but I haven't seen any so far.  All the swinger circles I have ever seen almost always deteriorated into crap.  Egos get hurt, people get pissed, and then everyone hates eachother.  I've seen it a million times. 

Really, I don't have a problem with the prospect of having more than one girlfriend at a time, but we would all have to know, love, and respect eachother a lot.  And there would have to be honesty. 

Oh yeah, and all my sexual fantasies are limited to one penis.  Mine :grin:  It seems wierd to me to be bangin a chick with another guy in the room. 

Still, though if someone can make poligamy work for them and everyone involved, more power to them.  But I think its a rare chance that someone won't get hurt. 

Personally, I would rather find a nice girl and settle down, and be able to trust her and know that we'll always be there for eachother, never keep secrets from eachother, and respect eachother enough to keep our hands to ourselves.  I don't think that is too much to ask from another person if I can fulfill my part of the bargain (which I have never had a problem with before). 

Also, I think polygamy is a sign of the spirtual poverty of mankind.  Its a consequence of our fast-food throw-away mentality.  I would rather not treat other human beings like garbage.  The connection between two who are truly in love is much more meaningful to me than a bunch of people who just fuck eachother.

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Re: Monogamy and Polygamy as valid but different paths. [Re: DoctorJ]
    #5670930 -

Cheating and swinging are NOT examples of polygamy. Polygamy is having more than one wife. To think one can not love more than one woman with all your heart and soul is like saying that as a parent, you can't have more than one child and love each of them with all your heart and soul. It's a different lifestyle than the christian dominated western example, but just as valid, and suits millions of people around the world, including tens of thousands in Utah.
RR


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Download Let's Grow Mushrooms



semper in excretia sumus solim profundum variat

"I've never had a failed experiment.  I've only discovered 10,000 methods which do not work."
Thomas Edison

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Re: Monogamy and Polygamy as valid but different paths. [Re: RogerRabbit]
    #5671538 -

what is good?
or what is more good, governs these issues.
with sex
as opposed to the issue of what is good, often it is just
"where can I go?"
so if there is no sense about implications.
that is all there is, can I go like this here with that person?
then of course
you have to consider that that person may want more than one to touch
or
may want only man or only woman near their nakedness.
many issues resolve in
"where can I go?"
and "what is good"
in sex and relationships.


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:brainfart: _ :finger:

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Re: Monogamy and Polygamy as valid but different paths. [Re: redgreenvines]
    #5671620 -

Its only natural for men to be more promiscuous, as we produce enough sperm to populate New York City a day.

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Re: Monogamy and Polygamy as valid but different paths. [Re: leery11]
    #5671663 -

Gamete and gamets means husband and wife in Greek, gamos means marriage. Polygamy is marriage to more than one wife, polyandry is marriage to more than one husband. Your use of the word polygamy is erroneous, and you demonstrate masculine bias. Moreover, it is beyond mere bias to presume that a male is going to have the ability to "heal" a woman through mere sexual activity. This shows little understanding about human (more-than-mammalian) experience, and even less experience with women. But you are right about being caught in the "Centauric" nature of the lower chakras. You are speaking only to an adolescent male "phallic stage" of psychosexual development (it's all about 'me' and 'getting off'), not about "genital loving" and fully adult sexuality which incorporates the higher emotions, love and hence ego transcendence. Adolescent sexuality (at any age) is not a "path."


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γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself

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Re: Monogamy and Polygamy as valid but different paths. [Re: redgreenvines]
    #5671938 -

Quote:
with sex
as opposed to the issue of what is good, often it is just
"where can I go?"


thats a problem of willpower. I could not have sex for aeons and aeons if I had to. If I couldn't find a worthy partner. People let their desires control them instead of the other way around. They are slaves to their own physiology. They let their desires and physical needs supercede morals and principles. Physical deisre is a very low thing to resonate with, dimensionally speaking. You wanna get off this lousy rock? Throw those desires out the window and start behaving morally.

Quote:
then of course
you have to consider that that person may want more than one to touch


I have considered this, and find it extremely selfish. "There's enough for everyone's need, but not enough for everyone's greed."

I'm sensitive to those who have orgies. Let them wallow in their physicality, if they so desire.

But some people only need one, and I applaud this, because thats really all anyone needs.

Wanting more than one lover, to me, is the same as wanting more food than one can eat, wanting a bigger house than one needs, wanting a car that consumes too much fuel, or wanting the wealth of an entire world in one's own pocket. Its greed, plain and simple. I find greed to be very distasteful.

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Re: Monogamy and Polygamy as valid but different paths. [Re: DoctorJ]
    #5672028 -

DoctorJ said:
Wanting more than one lover, to me, is the same as wanting more food than one can eat...


Wanting more than one lover, to the next man, may be the same as wanting more than one type of food to eat. One could get by just fine eating one kind of food his whole life, but it wouldn't be very much fun now would it?

It doesn't necessarily make us greedy to seek new experiences, after all, "variety is the spice of life"...


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"Quotation is a serviceable substitute for wit." ~Oscar Wilde

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Re: Monogamy and Polygamy as valid but different paths. [Re: Dfekt]
    #5672056 -

thats why they have 'serial monogamy'

you're with someone for awhile, you get bored or shit doesn't work out, so you end things and move on.  Nothing wrong with that. 

Personally, I find most people so fascinating that I get something new out of them every day.  There is no need to move on, usually. 


Some people say: "I need more than one, all at once!" 

Thats fine, but those people should restrict themselves to partners who share their tastes. 

A polygamist with a monogamist won't work because they aren't sensitive to eachother's needs.  I had to find this out the hard way :nonono:

The polygamist wants to be with others, and the monogamist says: "Why can't it just be us?"  Its a conflict of interest that should be avoided at all costs.  I've said goodbye to some girls I was really super in love with because they just couldn't handle monogamy.  I felt like a nazi, but it had to be done. 

You see, I grew up in an environment where swinging, polygamy, and orgies are the rule, not the exception.  I've seen these things firsthand, and found that they don't often work out.  Sometimes, I'll meet a new friend and he will find out what some of my friends do when I'm not around.  He hasn't ever seen anything like that before, and he wants to get involved.  So he does, then he gets hurt, and comes back to me and says: "Why, J, why?"  and I always respond: "You play with matches, you get burned." 

I've burned myself enough times to know not to get involved.  If that means its just gonna be me and Han Solo for awhile, so be it.  But the inexperienced often feel the need to experiment and try new things.  Thats fine, I just wish they'd be careful with their bodies, and considerate of the feelings of themselves and others.  Otherwise, the results are just going to be that much more painful.  Nobody needs to rack up a bunch of bad karma for themselves.

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Re: Monogamy and Polygamy as valid but different paths. [Re: DoctorJ]
    #5672070 -

DoctorJ said:
But I have a hard time trying to see polygamists as 'spiritually enlightened' people.


I was saying that polygamy is conducive to survival and monogamy is conducive to attaining spiritually advanced consociusness..... not sure why you said that ?
Quote:
Personally, I would rather find a nice girl and settle down, and be able to trust her and know that we'll always be there for eachother, never keep secrets from eachother, and respect eachother enough to keep our hands to ourselves.  I don't think that is too much to ask from another person if I can fulfill my part of the bargain (which I have never had a problem with before). 


me 2.
Quote:
Also, I think polygamy is a sign of the spirtual poverty of mankind.  Its a consequence of our fast-food throw-away mentality.  I would rather not treat other human beings like garbage.  The connection between two who are truly in love is much more meaningful to me than a bunch of people who just fuck eachother.


absolutely.

When I said valid paths I did not mean the paths lead the same place. Valid toward human existence and not inherently harmful or wrong.
RogerRabbit said:
Cheating and swinging are NOT examples of polygamy.  Polygamy is having more than one wife.  To think one can not love more than one woman with all your heart and soul is like saying that as a parent, you can't have more than one child and love each of them with all your heart and soul.  It's a different lifestyle than the christian dominated western example, but just as valid, and suits millions of people around the world, including tens of thousands in Utah.
RR


I suppose that's true...... I was thinking about mass procreation but "cheating" came from my monogamist way of viewing things.
MarkostheGnostic said:
Moreover, it is beyond mere bias to presume that a male is going to have the ability to "heal" a woman through mere sexual activity.


I'm not sure what you mean here. I said that two people can become one through the sexual act if they resonate properly. A woman could bring this change about in a man.
Quote:
and fully adult sexuality which incorporates the higher emotions, love and hence ego transcendence. Adolescent sexuality (at any age) is not a "path."


this appears to be in contradiction of what you said.

I am speaking about that KIND of sex though because it seems to be the kind of sex most people seek out regardless of age. And I did use the word erroneously.  :smirk: What's the word I'm trying to use that describes polygamy sans the marriage? Promiscuity?


--------------------
I am the MacDaddy of Heimlich County, I play it Straight Up Yo!

....I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm, to feel connected enough to step aside and weep like a widow, to feel inspired, to fathom the power, to witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain, to swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human......
Om Namah Shivaya, I tell you What!

Edited by leery11 (05/25/06 09:56 AM)

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Re: Monogamy and Polygamy as valid but different paths. [Re: leery11]
    #5672079 -

Quote:
I was saying that polygamy is conducive to survival and monogamy is conducive to attaining spiritually advanced consociusness..... not sure why you said that ?


well, I happen to know a lot of people who think they are 'enlightened' or whatever because they swing and have orgies and it doesn't get to them emotionally. And I must admit, these people have attained a degree of mastery over their emotions in that they have become completely cold and emotionally impotent. But they are very far from being 'enlightened'

to me, an enlightened person is someone who doesn't eat, sleep, or have sex. They are completely free from the bonds of the material world.

many hippies think that they have achieved enlightenment by having group sex. But this is the same, to me, as thinking one has achieved enlightenment by owning a bank, or a Maserati, or a million dollar boat. Material things are not part of enlightenment, and meaningless sex is most definitely a material thing.

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Re: Monogamy and Polygamy as valid but different paths. [Re: DoctorJ]
    #5672093 -

As long as an enlightened person was in a physical body they would need to keep it functioning. They probably wouldn't need sleep (meditation works just as well) or sex, but they would probably need to eat if they wanted to stick around for a while.


--------------------
I am the MacDaddy of Heimlich County, I play it Straight Up Yo!

....I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm, to feel connected enough to step aside and weep like a widow, to feel inspired, to fathom the power, to witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain, to swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human......
Om Namah Shivaya, I tell you What!

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Re: Monogamy and Polygamy as valid but different paths. [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #5672326 -

Actually, polygyny is marriage to more than one wife, and polygamy is marriage to more than one spouse of either sex.

leery 11:
Polyamory is a new term which was coined to describe non-married partnerships which include more than two humans.  This could be "swinging" or "open" relationships.  This would not include pseudo-monogamy, wherein the partners have agreed to remain monogamous, but secretly pursue sexual relationships with others.

I would say that single people engaging in promiscuous sex without any real agreement to be in relationship to one another is just being single. :shrug:

Personally, I think that healthy polygamy and polyamory are only possible in theory.  Without community/cultural support and acceptance, and without emotionally healthy partners, the practice of these agreements cannot work.

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Re: Monogamy and Polygamy as valid but different paths. [Re: Veritas]
    #5672655 -

Personally, I think that healthy polygamy and polyamory are only possible in theory. Without community/cultural support and acceptance, and without emotionally healthy partners, the practice of these agreements cannot work.

Damn! :frown:


--------------------
"Don't believe everything you think". -Anom.

" All that lives was born to die"-Anom.

With much wisdom comes much sorrow,
The more knowledge, the more grief.
Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC

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Re: Monogamy and Polygamy as valid but different paths. [Re: leery11]
    #5672682 -

I think I speak for a lot of guys when I say that my ideal arrangement would be to have a bisexual girlfriend/wife who likes threesomes. But I don't think I could truly commit myself to more than one partner. If someone else can, then more power to them. I'll take monogamy any day.


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Re: Monogamy and Polygamy as valid but different paths. [Re: Silversoul]
    #5672953 -

supposedly, I'm going to have 2 wives simultaneously.  According to a palm reader I met once.  Of course, that guy also said I'm the antichrist, so :tongue:

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Re: Monogamy and Polygamy as valid but different paths. [Re: DoctorJ]
    #5673057 -

Well he got one out of two right. :wink:


--------------------
"Don't believe everything you think". -Anom.

" All that lives was born to die"-Anom.

With much wisdom comes much sorrow,
The more knowledge, the more grief.
Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC

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Re: Monogamy and Polygamy as valid but different paths. [Re: Icelander]
    #5673061 -

I think that the AntiChrist would have an easier time getting laid than I do :lol:

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Re: Monogamy and Polygamy as valid but different paths. [Re: DoctorJ]
    #5673065 -

Polygamy would never work in our society. True polygamy isn't about sex, it is about children. The ideal is a good one. In practice, it hasn't worked because of selfishness.

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Re: Monogamy and Polygamy as valid but different paths. [Re: loopin20]
    #5673081 -

Almost nothing "works" in our society. :tongue:


--------------------
"Don't believe everything you think". -Anom.

" All that lives was born to die"-Anom.

With much wisdom comes much sorrow,
The more knowledge, the more grief.
Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC

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Unfolding Nature Shop: Unfolding Nature: Being in the Implicate Order

General Interest > Philosophy, Sociology & Psychology
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