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North Spore Shop: Injection Grain Bag, North Spore Mushroom Grow Kits & Cultivation Supplies

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Re: Am I Antisocial, Parties Depress Me [Re: scott2004bc]
    #2762156 -

Its much more then just that, its not shy, its more of your descent into hating being around others. Friendly people, mean people, anybody, it just goes downhill and for no reason other then something changes inside of you. Once its changed you cant just fix it either, some people need a little help.

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Re: Am I Antisocial, Parties Depress Me [Re: gotmagog]
    #2764960 -

thats when you do need to fucking seek out help. seriously, people shouldn't be so ignorant of their own awareness of depression that they slide into some sort of hate-pit.

i can't give specific advice on this sort of 'trip' because it hasn't happened to me for along time. but i will warn, its horrible. when i was about 14 i was hopping on the 'i-hate-everyone' bandwagon. it made me feel good to be myself and eating off thoughts of hate for others. i felt so wise and enlightened that i had found the ultimate shitty attitude.

both my parents knew i was fucked up. it was hella obvious. the way i acted: i would get out of control and be really hyper and cuss nonstop, i dressed gothic and overwhelmingly, looked everyone down and took the law with a grain of salt. that wasn't the worse year for my teenage years on drugs, so that didn't have anything to do with it. it was this anger that boiled inside and needed to be lashed out. so after two weeks of 9th grade it was fueled and i broke out. at that time i was a complete materalistic closeminded freak. i kept getting in trouble for wearing bondage chains, spiked dog collars and crazy black make up. so i went home to find my mother wanting to kill me almost because i wouldn't give up my important items.

i ended up in anger that wasn't completely based on the stupid clothing but that was the last straw. i had been on a couple earlier warnings with the cops about how i handled my anger.... so that night i was on a rampage, breaking stuff and threatening to kill my mom. so when the cops came i wasn't any different, i cussed at them thinking *i*, kat, wouldn't get arrested. i thought my parents wouldn't do that cause they were so soft around me. but no, i was arrested with a felony and went through many years of rehabiltation and recovery.

it sucked. when you take that slide you can't stop yourself cause you enjoy how time flies, you anticipate every moment when something will happen because of what you've done. and then the impact hits and you completely forget the fun and are sent through a bunch of obstacles..... its mind blowing how bad someone can get.

after that experience and several others in highschool ive forced myself to straighten up and quit falling to the mind's evilness. you have to control how you think. its a damn exercise but it works in the end, you save yourself the wasted energy and torment.

(sorry if this isn't about antisocialness really but its hatred, the same i guess, blindness and whatnot, hope it helps)


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"If you worried about falling off the bike, you would never get on."
Lance Armstrong


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Re: Am I Antisocial, Parties Depress Me [Re: gotmagog]
    #2779243 -

I feel the same way. Especially the dancing part. Except I do enjoy concerts.

For me it's more of a social detatchment that's been going on recently. I just don't feel the need to socialize with very many people anymore.


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North Spore Shop: Injection Grain Bag, North Spore Mushroom Grow Kits & Cultivation Supplies

Community > Physical and Mental Well-Being
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