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I am always lonely
    #18610670 -

I'll try to make this as short as possible for you guys.

In short, I'm 19 years old, and I'm just pretty much always lonely and unhappy. I have friends, but the friends I have feel more like acquaintances more than anything. I mean once school is out for the Summer, I'm pretty much alone. I attempt to make plans to chill and do shit with friends, but they always have some excuse as to why they can't make it. I was in a relationship with this girl for a while who I thought was my first love, until I found out she had cheated on me, which I has always suspected, but she fucked with my mind and made me feel stupid always saying "You're paranoid, it's all in your head."

My family isn't too close. My mom is moving out soon because she wants a divorce from my Dad, and both of my brothers are pretty much always doing their own thing, which I understand, so I don't see them too often. Even they shrug me off though, when I try to make plans just to hangout or go do something. I feel like I'm happiest when I'm in a relationship, but it's hard to get into a relationship when  none of your friends want to go out with you and do shit. I mean, there are a few decent chicks around here definitely, but I'm not just gonna go to a party alone without a friend with me. I feel like every time I try to make a new friend that I'm just not good enough, or cool enough in their opinion. I went and chilled with these girls that I was sorta friends with a while back, and we just smoked and chilled and talked, and I had fun. I guess they didn't though, because neither one ever texted me again or tried to make plans with me after that.

The friends I have, like I said, are always shrugging me off. That hurts ya know, because I get on facebook and see them posting pics of them chillin and doing shit with other friends, so I feel like people can make time for me, they just don't want to. After a while of this happening, this starts fucking with your head and you get to the point where you're like, what the fuck is my problem?Is there something wrong with me? So I try not to be lonely, I try to do shit with people, but everyone just pushes me aside, and this makes me feel unwanted, like some fucking stray dog that no one wants. It's been like this since high school. Like I said, it's not that I don't try to do shit with people, because I really do, it's just like no matter who it is, whether it's a dude I'm 'friends' with, or a girl I'm interested in, everyone just doesn't give a shit and it's straight up tiring.

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Re: I am always lonely [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18610756 -

I used to be this way, too. I eventually started doing things myself. New hobbies, travel, camping, whatever. The key was, I stayed positive, and made myself happy. You have to stop paying attention to what other people are doing and with whom. When you're happy with yourself, other people notice and gravitate to you. Before long people were looking at my pictures of all the shit I was doing, and they wanted to tag along. Friends, girls, it all snowballed from learning to be happy with myself. Good luck.

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Re: I am always lonely [Re: Anonymous #2]
    #18610986 -

Anonymous #2 said:
I used to be this way, too. I eventually started doing things myself. New hobbies, travel, camping, whatever. The key was, I stayed positive, and made myself happy. You have to stop paying attention to what other people are doing and with whom. When you're happy with yourself, other people notice and gravitate to you. Before long people were looking at my pictures of all the shit I was doing, and they wanted to tag along. Friends, girls, it all snowballed from learning to be happy with myself. Good luck.

:whathesaid:

Don't count on other people for your happiness, if you do, you will end up a very unhappy person. Girls will let you down, guy friends will blow you off for something better, deal with it.

Learn to be happy being alone, large parts of your life are going to be alone, that's a fact.  You need to be independent, even if you meet some friends, are you going to do everything with them?  No, do your own stuff.

Work on improving yourself, have something to offer other people, what do you have to even offer at age 19?  You are still developing into a man, keep working on you.

The more comfortable you are with yourself, the more people will gravitate towards you, stop looking on FB and the nonsense people post on it, it's phony BS.

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Re: I am always lonely [Re: Anonymous #3]
    #18611033 -

Yea, I'm aware that I will be alone for a lot of the time, but it just seems like every single person I know is always doing something with someone, and is always involving themselves in something socially. I mean I'm a teenager still, I feel like I should be surrounded by friends more often than I am alone. I do do things when I am alone, and they keep me busy for a little bit, but that sense of loneliness is always there, no matter what things I occupy myself with. I mean, this entire summer I have gone out and hung out with people twice, the entire summer. It just makes me feel like sortve a loser, ya know

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Re: I am always lonely [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18611760 -

DUDE!!!!! LET ME HELP YOU IN THIS SITUATION I AM IN A VERY SIMILAR SITUATION....

Alright so my story is this: I have never had any more than few CLOSE best friends who have always been there to watch my back and have fun and get crazy drunk and talk shit with all the time... Back in high school I had a tough time with anyone and everyone around me because of how shy and cynical I was of people. I'm cynical because of certain reasons based on an idea. The idea is this: My entire life I've always had what people call a "baby face" and I look very young for my age. And I know that every single person in the world sees this and they all have judged me more than you can imagine and that's one of the reasons I never made friends and barely had the ability to get girlfriends because how do you meet girls without a group of guys to go to parties and look COOL with ya know?
Well, I'm now 19 and I moved to a city only 45 minutes away from my home city to pursue my academic career(college, and yes I'm 19 and I already call my profession a "Scholar"). Well, let me tell ya. I'M LONELY AS FUCK AND HAVEN'T FUCKED A GIRL SINCE I LOST MY VIRGINITY THREE YEARS AGO. It fucking sucks bro. But listen to something very important.

My entire life I have been a black sheep. Even in my family (have a very split family in which my dad is now married to the woman who he was cheating with on my mom... yeah she's a straight up gold digger and ruins everything but that's besides the point) but even in my family life I'm a kind of black sheep but yet people have been recognizing my over exuberant intelligence and people seem to only listen to me because of it. It's not that they like me or even want to be around but because of how intelligent I am they know they HAVE to listen to what I have to say. But yeah moving on. So I'm out here all on my own and I'm beginning to find that being alone is my only way to cope with reality. I have the ability to see things in a third person perspective and understand more clearly why I act certain ways and why others act certain ways... But basically dude, I'm as lonely as you but yet I'm actually excited for what's to come in life. I know that people don't like me now but that's what drives to do better and better each day. Each day I get up, ALONE, and work out/ do something beneficial to my life. I'm studying stocks and getting ready to start investing and I've even taken up mycology to make things a bit interesting... But the point is this:

PEOPLE DON'T LIKE ME. I'M A BLACK SHEEP. BUT I MADE A REALIZATION ALONG THE WAY. WHATEVER PEOPLE THINK OR SAY IS SIMPLY WHAT THEY THINK AND SAY. IT'S NOT REALITY. REALITY IS CREATED FROM WITHIN YOU AND YOU ARE THE ONLY DRIVING FORCE WHICH PROPELS YOUR LIFE FORWARD. FUCK THEM ALL AND KEEP ON MOVING. REMEMBER THIS ONE FUNDAMENTAL TRUTH ABOUT LIFE: WHEN YOU DIE, DO YOU THINK THERE'S GOING TO BE FAMILY AND FRIENDS REALLY THERE TO HOLD YOUR HAND ALONG THE WAY THROUGH THE AFTERLIFE WE ARE GOING TO?

(the answer should be no and you should understand that yes, I do love them all but once you begin to see the beauty of how hard and cruel this world is you'll begin to realize that in the end it all doesn't matter and by you not doing anything, you've simply missed out on a lot)

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Re: I am always lonely [Re: Anonymous #4]
    #18611805 -

By the way, I wake up to this video every morning to ensure success for the day...



Hell, people may not like or hang out with me now, but this is what drives to be that person who they WISHED they woulda hung out with more or listen to more often. Trust me dude... I'm completely straight and people have accused me of being homosexual the last couple years. But i know someday they're all gonna wish they woulda shut the fuck up and listened to what I have to say cuz someday I'm going to own a multi-million dollar enterprise that they're all going to wish I would hire them into. But fuck em. I am what drives my life forward and "I'm not afraid to create those opportunities for myself." Get out there and JUST DO IT.

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Re: I am always lonely [Re: Anonymous #4]
    #18611877 -

Anonymous #4 said:
DUDE!!!!! LET ME HELP YOU IN THIS SITUATION I AM IN A VERY SIMILAR SITUATION....

Alright so my story is this: I have never had any more than few CLOSE best friends who have always been there to watch my back and have fun and get crazy drunk and talk shit with all the time... Back in high school I had a tough time with anyone and everyone around me because of how shy and cynical I was of people. I'm cynical because of certain reasons based on an idea. The idea is this: My entire life I've always had what people call a "baby face" and I look very young for my age. And I know that every single person in the world sees this and they all have judged me more than you can imagine and that's one of the reasons I never made friends and barely had the ability to get girlfriends because how do you meet girls without a group of guys to go to parties and look COOL with ya know?
Well, I'm now 19 and I moved to a city only 45 minutes away from my home city to pursue my academic career(college, and yes I'm 19 and I already call my profession a "Scholar"). Well, let me tell ya. I'M LONELY AS FUCK AND HAVEN'T FUCKED A GIRL SINCE I LOST MY VIRGINITY THREE YEARS AGO. It fucking sucks bro. But listen to something very important.

My entire life I have been a black sheep. Even in my family (have a very split family in which my dad is now married to the woman who he was cheating with on my mom... yeah she's a straight up gold digger and ruins everything but that's besides the point) but even in my family life I'm a kind of black sheep but yet people have been recognizing my over exuberant intelligence and people seem to only listen to me because of it. It's not that they like me or even want to be around but because of how intelligent I am they know they HAVE to listen to what I have to say. But yeah moving on. So I'm out here all on my own and I'm beginning to find that being alone is my only way to cope with reality. I have the ability to see things in a third person perspective and understand more clearly why I act certain ways and why others act certain ways... But basically dude, I'm as lonely as you but yet I'm actually excited for what's to come in life. I know that people don't like me now but that's what drives to do better and better each day. Each day I get up, ALONE, and work out/ do something beneficial to my life. I'm studying stocks and getting ready to start investing and I've even taken up mycology to make things a bit interesting... But the point is this:

PEOPLE DON'T LIKE ME. I'M A BLACK SHEEP. BUT I MADE A REALIZATION ALONG THE WAY. WHATEVER PEOPLE THINK OR SAY IS SIMPLY WHAT THEY THINK AND SAY. IT'S NOT REALITY. REALITY IS CREATED FROM WITHIN YOU AND YOU ARE THE ONLY DRIVING FORCE WHICH PROPELS YOUR LIFE FORWARD. FUCK THEM ALL AND KEEP ON MOVING. REMEMBER THIS ONE FUNDAMENTAL TRUTH ABOUT LIFE: WHEN YOU DIE, DO YOU THINK THERE'S GOING TO BE FAMILY AND FRIENDS REALLY THERE TO HOLD YOUR HAND ALONG THE WAY THROUGH THE AFTERLIFE WE ARE GOING TO?

(the answer should be no and you should understand that yes, I do love them all but once you begin to see the beauty of how hard and cruel this world is you'll begin to realize that in the end it all doesn't matter and by you not doing anything, you've simply missed out on a lot)


Thanks man! Yea, I've also always had a baby face, and people have accused me of being gay before too because I'm not into sports like all the other guys around here and I have long swooshy hair. I definitely don't give a fuck as much as I used to but it's still hard at times.

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Re: I am always lonely [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18612717 -

Bro, grow a pair of hefty, thick, no fuck around balls.


stop being such a dramatic pussy that you need to be accepted by others. learn to excel by your self because you will be better off rather than comparing yourself to others success. be a fucking man(or woman)

hate to tell you, but in the real world, no one cares about your problems. so turn your stupid fucking problem around and be a success story. show the people that blew you off how fucking fantastic you are, and when the times comes that people want to kiss your ass cause of how great you are, you can finally get that acceptance and tell em' to fuck off.

grow a fucking pair pussy.

i wish i knew that knowledge before i got into my profession. just don't be a dick. be a knowledgeable dick.

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Re: I am always lonely [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18612759 -

21 year olds advice: SIMILAR SITUATION

Dude, im in a similar situation, I do have 2 friends that I do see, which is weird for me because before my life got ruined with the law (long story) I used to have more friends than I knew what to do with, I had to ditch people constantly, but for the past 3 years, its been only me, and my one friend that I see a few times a month and one that moved to miami but we still talk.

What I do is I look forward to how awesome life with be once I have a job where I can support myself and I live on my own, I want to move to the city and go out to bars and clubs and just meet people and start a new life, and thinking of this makes me happy, I look forward to it.

I havent really left my house other then to get things in a couple years, except for maybe a few times. Whenever I see people we go to my house because its really chill as far as getting fucked up and smoking.

Just look forward to the future, your goodlooking enough to get girls apparently, so once youre on your own and move to a city, youl be fine. Just look forward to it. Count this as your life on pause, thats what im doing. I just put on a FUCK IT attitude until then and go through it.

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Re: I am always lonely *DELETED* [Re: Anonymous #5]
    #18612778 -

Post deleted by Anonymous

Reason for deletion: yes


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Re: I am always lonely [Re: Anonymous #7]
    #18612789 -

Yeahhhh... Just dont even read #7 you dont want that attitude.

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Re: I am always lonely [Re: Anonymous #6]
    #18612980 -

cmon op...

what im trying to get at, is figure yourself out. find out WHO YOU ARE. once you figure that out, everything will fall into place. stop worrying about having friends. only 8% of people keep their child hood friends. get your fucking career straight, and everything will line up. your only 19. go to college. get a usefull degree. not photog or drama cause you wanna bang the chics. do you notice how that was contradicting? welcome to the real world. here ill help you..

Stop listening to other people's opinions on what you should do. you know what you want to do. so fucking do it. stop asking. if you want to be the best under water basket weaver, than fucking do it. don't ask ANYONE for permission or to be accepted for it. do what you want, and be happy. cause your going to work for the next 30-40 years just so you have enough money to die. its up to you if you want to make it feel like work. I hate to be a stupid cliché, but do what you love, and you will never work a day in your life. and that's what it is all about.

get to work you slacker..

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Re: I am always lonely [Re: Anonymous #5]
    #18612996 -

f

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Re: I am always lonely [Re: Anonymous #5]
    #18612999 -

Anonymous #5 said:
cmon op...

what im trying to get at, is figure yourself out. find out WHO YOU ARE. once you figure that out, everything will fall into place. stop worrying about having friends. only 8% of people keep their child hood friends. get your fucking career straight, and everything will line up. your only 19. go to college. get a usefull degree. not photog or drama cause you wanna bang the chics. do you notice how that was contradicting? welcome to the real world. here ill help you..

Stop listening to other people's opinions on what you should do. you know what you want to do. so fucking do it. stop asking. if you want to be the best under water basket weaver, than fucking do it. don't ask ANYONE for permission or to be accepted for it. do what you want, and be happy. cause your going to work for the next 30-40 years just so you have enough money to die. its up to you if you want to make it feel like work. I hate to be a stupid cliché, but do what you love, and you will never work a day in your life. and that's what it is all about.

get to work you slacker..


The only thing I am remotely interested in is philosophy, which has an extremely low employment rate. I also like writing. So I'll probably just struggle, barely getting by as a philosophic writer until I die. What a shitty existence.

Edited by Anonymous (07/26/13 01:07 AM)

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Re: I am always lonely [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18613063 -

stop whining.

I know people that get degrees in hospitality and stupid shit like that. they spends 4 years in college and get 100k in debt to work in a fucking hotel just to check people in. I know people who have degrees to be a fucking animal doctor, but you know what, they lost interest and now they work at a god damn paint store as a interior associate decorator. I did that same stupid job making the same amount they are, except I was 19, and there 24, and they have a fucking 4 year degree. 

what im saying is, yea there fucking dumb for getting in degrees they don't want, and yea there fucking dumb for spending serious amounts of money on said degrees they don't fucking use.

but you know what, at least they chased the dream they wanted and stopped bitching about how there existence might be shitty.

in life, you have to take chances. you think all these great men you have read about made a fucking killin with the ladies and money? fuck no. have you ever read about Nostradamus fucking bitches? I mean fuck, Einstein figured out math problems I can even solve now, but I bet I banged more chinks than him and whos more famous? not me!

as much as you want money,chicks,fame,fortune and what ever, you need to realize even if you have everything, it doesn't mean your happy. you need to do what makes YOU happy. not what society thinks makes you happy. That's a very hard lesson to learn. you will figure it out. just be the best you can be..as lame as that sounds...but you will find your own fortune. Just Fucking Go For It.

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Re: I am always lonely [Re: Anonymous #5]
    #18614781 -

Dude i fucking love philosophy too and that's all I want to study in college. I've always told my family and friends that if I was able to do what I TRULY wanted to do on this planet, I would become a theoretical physicist with a minor in philosophy because those are my TRUE SCHOLARLY PASSIONS. But along the way in my life I made a startling realization that this HUMAN EXPERIENCE is not about what YOU want in this life. There's a higher power dictating the true nature of everything around you and you have to grasp the difference between what is you and what is everything you have no control over.

I'm going to graduate with a double major in economics/finance and don't get me wrong when I say this. I love the shit out of economics and I have a great talent and great ambition to succeed in the business world but that's not what I TRULY want to do. But the thing is, I've given myself up to the "ALL ONE-NESS" which dictates the true nature of reality. We live in a culture in which people like us (introverted people who DON'T thrive off of social interaction but rather thrive FROM WITHIN OUR OWN SELVES) are not allowed to be "ourselves". It sucks man but you just have to fake it until YOU ARE ALLOWED TO DICTATE THE FUTURE. I've accepted this confrontation hungry society and I'm hitting it head on. I plan to work my ass off in business for the next 20 years of my life so that when I'm done conquering the economic/political realm around me, I can then finally make some truth out of life with the last 50 years I'll have to live. Yes I plan to retire by the age of 40-45 so that way I can spend the last 50 years of my life studying WHAT I WANTED TO STUDY. It sucks but you have lend yourself to the true direction the world is going and you have to fit yourself in closely. I don't want to venture too much into my beliefs but you just have to say "fuck it and go out there and just do it."

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Re: I am always lonely [Re: Anonymous #4]
    #18616196 -

Yes, you need to be ok with being alone sometimes.  But all of these people who say you don't need anyone but yourself is wrong.  You NEED personal interaction to be happy.  So you think people think they are too cool hang out with you? Fuck them, try to make friends with someone who you think is uncool.  Just talk to absolutely anyone who you come into contact with and try to find a common interest.  Do you have any hobbies? That will help to meet people.  Have you gone away to college?  It's not for everyone, but go live in a dorm at a big university.  I guarantee you will meet tons of people who are your type of people.

It's normal to have slow periods where you feel like you have no friends. It's like when you can't find anyone to buy weed from.  It'll be around again.  A year from now, you will probably be hanging out with an entire different crowd.

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Re: I am always lonely [Re: Anonymous #8]
    #18616273 -

I'm happy that you understand man! Everyone has been saying to pretty much  say to hell with everyone and get used to being alone. I know that I am going to be alone sometimes, and at times, probably alone for a while, but it's rough to go with extremely little social interaction for three months, fuck that's a quarter of a year pretty much solitary, and it's not cool. My interests make it a bit hard to make friends around here, so a lot of the time when it comes to talking to girls or making new friends, I kinda just have to lie about what I believe in, which is hard, but I would honestly have no one at all if I completely upfront about my beliefs. Being a politically radical, atheistic, somewhat intelligent guy, here in the southern US isn't typically popular with most people, or girls that I may be into. So that's part of the problem likely.

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Re: I am always lonely [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18617060 -

Well then there's your problem right there. Your ideas and beliefs no longer vibe with the environment that you've been accustomed to being involved with. If you're so politically radical and somewhat intelligent, move to a new area of the US with the intent to go to school or gain a high level position somewhere. Trust me dude, here in the Midwest we have no accents and we're all pretty nice to each other. Don't get me wrong, we do have areas of cities where everyone is stuck up when they're not even really rich but for the most part we're pretty accepting of people around here. We don't have the "Bible Belt" status where everyone is a devout christian or at least has to act that way. Or I recommend going to Boston or New York if you have great political ideas. Just remember from the video. "You are your driving engine, and you are your own brake... They know where they are going in this world, do you?"

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Re: I am always lonely [Re: Anonymous #1]
    #18617219 -

some of what the others said may sound harsh at first bro but its tough love. at your age things may be confusing, the earlier you understand that people are attracted to success, the better. but it all depends on your definition of success. a guy with the worlds greatest acid will be the shit to a bunch of hippies, maybe temporarily, maybe they'll develop even closer bonds because of the substance...thats where variables fall in. to me its making other others happy and to feel successful with what they have and can have. i have this buddy whos overweight, drives a prius, and doesnt make much money, but hes the life of the party and gets mad pussy. and dudes in his mid-30's. he exuberates confidence and makes other people feel good about themselves while still reminding them that they can achieve more and more, and shows he content with his definition of success. existence can be endured and enjoyed at the same time. dont feed yourself this garbage that you'll always be alone. it can lead to mental illness especially depression. you are what you believe. theres people with loads of friends that feel alone. some of the stuff i wrote has probably already been said by others here, but they all care for your well-being if they took the time to type it out. take care my friend, i know online replies dont make up for lack of physical contact/interactions with people unfortunately, but you'll have different people in your life soon. remind yourself that with all hardships comes ease. happy tripping.

Edited by Anonymous (07/26/13 08:44 PM)

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