(Female)
If someone DESERVES to be decked, I don't think gender matters.
Especially if someone hits you. If someone seriously hits you, even a girl, for NO reason other than they think you won't hit them back, then you should hit them exactly where they hit you, and with the same force to show them that it is not funny or cute.
For instance, I have male friends who have been hit in the solar plexus or kicked in the nuts by girls and they dropped to the ground. The girls hit/kicked them so hard that they fell to their knees.
This abusive, "playful" behaviour that girls engage in makes me sick. It is not a fun game if one of the opponents is unarmed, so to speak.
In both of the situations mentioned above, I think that my one friend should have punched her in the solar plexus, and the other should have kicked her in the crotch. Let me say- IT HURTS GETTING KICKED THERE, regardless of gender! It may hurt worse for men, but I can personally attest to the fact that my crotch is among the most painful places to get kicked!
The social problem is that if a guy returns the blow, he is very likely to get the shit beat out of him by guys or girls, and have a bad reputation of hitting girls. People will say "It doesn't matter what the circumstances are or were, you DON'T hit a girl- EVER."
This notion is completely unfair, and uncivil.
Generally speaking, I think the only times that physical violence is called for is if someone it putting their hands on you. If someone attacks you, or you have made it clear that they are not to touch you in anyway, and they do anyway, then you have a right to physically assert yourself.
Lastly, it is NOT OKAY to take advantage of a situation because you are bigger or stronger or better trained than someone else. This applies to male vs male fights as well. It is fucked up for a much larger person to initiate violence towards someone obviously less equipped. However, if let's say, a smaller girl was to sock a large guy in the face, I think he is justified in hitting her back with equal force- not harder.
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