There are probably many on this board with very high IQ's. I hope the following helps. I just turned 40. I realized in high school, some of this enlightenment, awareness, without drugs. But, it is true, we can only be ourselves. All humankind really wants to be loved.
Highly intelligent people, and particularly those who have an awarness through whatever means, tend to be on the extreme right hand side of the "bell Curve". So the masses view these people, when they express themselves, as crazy, weird, not of mainstream thought.
You are not alone. The problem with great minds and enlightened individuals is they are a minority. As such, loneliness is not oncommon. In fact , i believe the loneliness exacerbates the use of mind altering substances. This creates further isolation.
The system, well we could talk about this for days on end. the system is what it is. My suggestions, or at least some that help me are the following; 1) reach out, find someone who accepts you as your are, even a small group.......be true to each other 2) travel as much as possible, this helps with the feeling of loneliness and it gives you the opportunity to see various cultures living in different ways, this will make you feel less different 3) read 4) get a hobby 5) try to stay active in some type of phyiscal activity, 6) discipline your self
I live with one ft in each reality. This requires discipline. After one 'feels" the truth or obtaisn an awareness, one realizes even more so that the world system is not what our existence is about. One experiences unconditional love, unity with all, bliss, rigpa, nirvana, utopia, whatever one wants to call it.
This is a gift that most people never experience in their entire lives and they die afraid. Take your awarness, enlightenment and put it to good use, reach-out, dont be a teacher of enlightenment, but you , with patience can be a "guide" for others. Subtleness will allow, in time all, even the most closed minded "lemmings" of society to begin to understand.
If a true spiritual, conscious revolution/evolution, change is taking place this is what need be done. I truly believe that man is evolving exponentially rather than linearly and we are at a time when, the energy and awareness, enlightenment will be easier for some than others. The change , while some may view it as an apocalyptic, or ctastrophic event, is a positive change.
If enough people who have been touched, discipline themselves to be Guides not Masters, not teachers, more human's will awaken spiritually.
Initially, when I first had the awarness and following, having to exist in the system, I found myself having anxiety. (as a side note, i have been in teh system, college, medical school, societies institutions, i agree that all of them are spiritually blinding and creates a type of prison warder of the openening of the spirit, soul and oneness) The anxiety was caused by having these realkizations and then looking at and recognizing the system for what it is. I always think of the movie "American beauty".
Now i have taken this realization and when i start to experience this, albeit at times still hard, take that anxiety and turn it into the felling I had of awarness, enlightenment, bliss and try to project that on society. i used to feel sorry for the others because I knew they had not had this experience. i yearned to open and just telll them. Instead, now I have empathy, i understand teh way they are because they have not had that experience. In this context I try to display unconditional love and an understanding that all, even the most opionated biggots, are all of the same oneness.
This doesnt work all the time, but it does some times. If there is a specific object, piece of music, setting that reminds you of your enlightenement and that feeling of bliss then, when any loneliness or anxiety sets in try to use the music or object to feel the bliss again.
Discipline is important, dont turn to continued rug use to otain this. Dont retreat further into a corner. Accept what is going on and you must, whether you like it or not be involved in the 'system" in some manner. If you dont you, while maybe knowing that this glimpse of your vehicle's existence is surely not what the eternal soul is like, you will be as empty as others who never had been enlightened during their "stay". Without of humans, and teh ability to experience a oneness with them, you will be lonely.
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