This weekend I had a bad trip. I went to a "hippie" festival and camped out with a girl I know from work, and a bunch of her friends. The first night I decide to really go all out, so I ate 7 dried grams of B+. Now, the most i've ever taken was about 5 grams, and that was by myself.
So I take the shrooms, and walk around. I can feel how powerful they are. I'm looking for the people I came with, but couldn't find them, so I go back to the tent, and there they are. So I sat around and tried to talk to everyone. Soon I realized that I had made a mistake. I realized that I had taken more shrooms than I had ever taken before in with a bunch of other people that I didn't really know who were drinking beer and snorting cocaine. The one girl who I did know is the girl I work with, and we haven't hung out that much outside of work, and at work I act very differently than I act outside of work, so I didn't feel that comfortable tripping around her. I definitely didn't feel comfortable tripping around her friends. These are all the kinds of people who like to bust your balls all the time and fuck with you for laughs. That's just how they are when they aren't drinking and on coke, so now they're really in a different mindset than I was.
I realized that I had made a big mistake by leaving myself VERY vulnerable around people who dress and smoke weed like "hippies", but who are in actuality redneck jock types. I don't know why it took my 7 grams to realize this. THEN it started to rain, so I was stuck in a small area with them!! Luckily some of them went to go see the bands, and left me behind. I started feeling very uncomfortable at this point, and started to realize that I didn't like these people that much, and that I was unable to hide that from them, so I just went to the tent and layed down.
Now remember, these people were drunk and hopped up on coke and whatnot, and will fuck with you for fun if they feel like they can get some kind of upper hand on you. They had that jock mentality, and I was sinking deeper into my mind. When people asked why I was in the tent, I just said I was "too fucked up and needed to lay down", and luckily they bought it! So at this point I realized that I have made a mistake and that I want the trip to be OVER. I'm laying there trying to compose myself in case someone comes into the tent. Luckily again, noone came into the tent for a while, but that only helped a little bit. I was having a BAD trip in there. I was feeling like the devil, and that I was in hell, and when I didn't feel like that, I just felt like I was going to die. The reason I felt like the devil I think was because this place was "heaven" for these drunk and coked up dudes, and it was the opposite for me, so I must have been the devil. I was feeling like the physical embodiment of all of the negative energy at the festival, and even those the people I came with were drunk and high on coke, they are very perceptive. So I was very paranoid that they would come into the tent, feel my bad mood and fuck with me. I was paranoid man. EVERYTHING they said....I thought was about me, but my concious mind was saying no Learyfan, they aren't talking about you, you're just having a bad trip on mushrooms. At one point as I closed my eyes I was seeing these cartoon people who represented EVERYONE at the festival, and then another cartoon person who represented myself, controling all of them on a deeper level. I felt bad because I felt like I was in control of everyone, but I was in no condition to have that power since I was feeling SO negative!
As I got deeper and deeper and DEEPER into my mind I had to try harder and harder to stay grounded because I didn't want to start yelling and screaming and going apeshit because I inturpreted something someone said outside to be something bad about me. I kept talking to myself so that I wouldn't get lost in my mind. I kept saying "love, love, love, love, love" or "God" or something positive like that in order to steer myself in the right direction, which is pretty amazing because at that point I had lost almost any concept of who I was and where I was. I started saying "you're just on mushrooms Learyfan. It's a drug, and you'll come out of it." I started thinking of people who Learyfan knew in his life, such as all of my best friends and whatnot. I also thought of Shroomism since I remembered he was at the same festival. I also remembered to laugh because I remembered reading that laughing actually counteracts negativity in your body and mind or however that goes, so I tried my best to laugh. All of these things helped.
Usually when i'm tripping I have the feeling of being a part of God. This time I felt like I was apart from God, so I was begging God to make it stop, and telling him that i'd never trip again if he could bring me out of it. I knew that love of some kind of God would be the only thing that could help me. At one point, I did feel this devine presence there to comfort me, and it felt good. After that, the good and evil in me fought it out for the rest of the trip. Back and fourth over and over until it was over. I remember people playing accoustic guitar outside of the tent. They were playing "Ring Of Fire" by Johnny Cash. The irony made me laugh.
Towards the end, one of the most annoying and ball busting members of the party I came with came into the tent to pass out. I kept thinking he was going to say something to me, and that I was too fucked up on shrooms to act like I liked him, and that that would start a fight. He felt like the devil to me. I even had this fairly vivid image of me attacking him and then a bunch of people holding me down, but then I remembered that everything that could possibly happen in the universe has already happened, and that we can choose to go that route or not, and so I chose NOT to let that happen. I was proud of myself. Then later on, the girl who brought me came into the tent to fall asleep as well. Luckily I was coming out of it at this point. She wanted to smoke a bowl but I was like NOoooooooooooooooooooooooooooo. I didn't tell her that I had had a bad trip because I didn't feel like getting my balls busted at that time or any time about it.
So eventually, the God part of me won the fight, and I didn't competely humiliate myself infront of everyone I came with and everyone else who came to the festival including 3 other people from my job who also came and camped pretty close to us. I felt really good. I made myself forget about the differences between myself and the people I came with. I just realized again that those people are just another part of me, and that "there's only one of us in the room". It felt so good to be drinking beer and talking to everyone. The beer distanced me from the insane place I had just been. It grounded me in reality. In a way, it was one of my saviors because it took me to where everyone else was.
So that was a FUCKED up trip, but there was no harm done. This was my first ever "hippie" festival, so I got to hear and see things I had never seen before, such as.....
people VERY openly selling drugs
a fucking crack pipe(more evidence that the people I came with are very different than me)
cocaine(yes, i've never even seen coke before. I put some on my gums, but didn't snort it)
molly!(MDA supposidly) (didn't feel like rolling, so I didn't try it! Did get to see it though)
Got to smoke TONS of different strains of weed such as......
"beaster"(BC bud)
Blueberry
Skunk #13
Jack Herer
Misty
.......uhhh I can't remember the rest. Like I said, I smoked a LOT.
Drugs I heard were going around......
psilocybin(!!!)( that's right, someone said synthetic psilocybin pills were there! Me no try after bad trip)
shrooms
shroom's disguised as chocolate cookies
LSD(VERY little of this going around, but I heard a few gel tabs were there)(one of the people I was with got ripped off. He bought a "book" of LSD sheets for $800.00...........................FAKE!   )
Ecstacy
bad shit like coke, methadone, oxy etc etc
some sythetic drug that was supposed to be like mescaline
..........uhh I forget whatelse
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Mp3 of the month: The Mamas & the Papas - Strange Young Girls
Edited by Learyfan (04/10/25 07:18 PM)
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