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Girls who mold their personalities around that of their boyfriend
    #6202333 -

nothing upsets me more than to see a girl completely fall in line with the thoughts and ideals of her boyfriend. All too often this happens, a complete sacrifice of ones individual personality (if there ever was one) to conform to a realtionship that usually dosent last.

Usually girls like this will always be in a relationship beacuse it is how they define themselves, through someone else...

it drives me nuts i tell ya...


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PEACE

:mushroom2:zippoz:mushroom2:



"in times of widespread chaos and confusion, it has been the duty of more advanced human beings - artists, scientists, clowns, and philosophers - to create order. In such times as ours however, when there is too much order, too much m management, too much programming and control, it becomes the duty of superior men and women and women to fling their favorite monkey wrenches into the machinery. To relieve the repression of the human spirit, they must sow doubt and disruption"

"People do it every day, they talk to themselves ... they see themselves as they'd like to be, they don't have the courage you have, to just run with it."

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Re: Girls who mold their personalities around that of their boyfriend [Re: ZippoZ]
    #6202343 -

I agree. My current girlfriend did this when we started dating, and I've tried my best to get her away from this line of thinking. After over a year I think it's safe to say that she has her own opinions to the extent that we argue quite a bit on controversial issues.

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Re: Girls who mold their personalities around that of their boyfriend [Re: ZippoZ]
    #6202345 -

You think creepily. Did a woman tear your heart to bits recently?

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Re: Girls who mold their personalities around that of their boyfriend [Re: Innominate]
    #6202347 -

or does she only have her own opinions beacuse you let her know thats what you want in her?


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PEACE

:mushroom2:zippoz:mushroom2:



"in times of widespread chaos and confusion, it has been the duty of more advanced human beings - artists, scientists, clowns, and philosophers - to create order. In such times as ours however, when there is too much order, too much m management, too much programming and control, it becomes the duty of superior men and women and women to fling their favorite monkey wrenches into the machinery. To relieve the repression of the human spirit, they must sow doubt and disruption"

"People do it every day, they talk to themselves ... they see themselves as they'd like to be, they don't have the courage you have, to just run with it."

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Re: Girls who mold their personalities around that of their boyfriend [Re: Soggy_Donuts]
    #6202425 -

Soggy_Donuts said:
You think creepily.  Did a woman tear your heart to bits recently?



How is what he said remotely creepy in anyway??  I've seen it before many times.

You see it all the time though.  I've known women who dispised heavy metal become obsessed with it while dating a rocker and then once the breakup is over, they hate metal again.  The worst thing is political or religious views.  It's probably where the term "born-again Christian" comes from.  :lol:

My problem lately has been the exact opposite...women who never consider anybody else's opinions. :tongue2:


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Every mistake, intentional or otherwise, in the above post, is the fault of the reader.

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Re: Girls who mold their personalities around that of their boyfriend *DELETED* [Re: ZippoZ]
    #6202430 -

Post deleted by blinkidiot

Reason for deletion: Im sorry



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Re: Girls who mold their personalities around that of their boyfriend [Re: blink]
    #6202442 -

Yeah they do. They call it "whipped". There's not an equal term for when females do it though.


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Re: Girls who mold their personalities around that of their boyfriend [Re: Shroomism]
    #6202450 -

Retarded?


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Every mistake, intentional or otherwise, in the above post, is the fault of the reader.

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Re: Girls who mold their personalities around that of their boyfriend [Re: ZippoZ]
    #6202490 -

zippoz said:
Usually girls like this will always be in a relationship beacuse it is how they define themselves, through someone else...

it drives me nuts i tell ya...



me too this is probably why one or two have that utter horror in their soul when it is time to let go...

dark

*shivers* brrrr


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read books

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Re: Girls who mold their personalities around that of their boyfriend [Re: Penguarky Tunguin]
    #6202511 -

Penguarky Tunguin said:
How is what he said remotely creepy in anyway?? I've seen it before many times.



What does you having seen it many times before have to do with it?

Allow me to adress this anyhow. The member that initiated this thread stated that nothing upsets him more than to see a girl fall in line with the thoughts and ideals of her significant other. Why? Who is this person to care what others do?

Love is a form of obsession. It blinds individuals. Often times, people in love are like dogs. Rather brainless and mostly concerned with being obedient and receiving positive reinforcement.
If a girl shows her commitment, and love through assimilation, that is her choice; if only subconsiously.

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Re: Girls who mold their personalities around that of their boyfriend [Re: blink]
    #6202530 -

blinkidiot said:
guys do it just as much.



i agree, the idea of a relationship is to complement each other, while keeping your identities seperate. But the idea is also to become one in a spiritual way.

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Re: Girls who mold their personalities around that of their boyfriend [Re: Soggy_Donuts]
    #6202539 -

Soggy_Donuts said:
Penguarky Tunguin said:
How is what he said remotely creepy in anyway??  I've seen it before many times.



What does you having seen it many times before have to do with it?

Allow me to adress this anyhow.  The member that initiated this thread stated that nothing upsets him more than to see a girl fall in line with the thoughts and ideals of her significant other.  Why?  Who is this person to care what others do?

Love is a form of obsession.  It blinds individuals.  Often times, people in love are like dogs.  Rather brainless and mostly concerned with being obedient and receiving positive reinforcement.
If a girl shows her commitment, and love through assimilation, that is her choice; if only subconsiously.



Last paragraph:  :thumbup:

But 'who is he to care'... sometimes it affects us, through torturous use of emotional bonds.. ok so thats some scar tissue, but a point i have to agree with on zippoz approach to it as an issue.

In line with your last para: perhaps its not entirely healthy, for both parties? even if it is just the way of some people, in a consuming appropriation (?) of love


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read books

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Re: Girls who mold their personalities around that of their boyfriend [Re: Corporal Kielbasa]
    #6202545 -

Corporal Kielbasa said:
i agree, the idea of a relationship is to complement each other, while keeping your identities seperate.  But the idea is also to become one in a spiritual way.



..yeah  :laugh:


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read books

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Re: Girls who mold their personalities around that of their boyfriend [Re: ZippoZ]
    #6202751 -

I had one who molded herself to me, but for her benefit, not mine.  She's like a chameleon to whoever she's with.  That's what I can't stand. :mad2:

Edited by Newbie (10/23/06 07:14 PM)

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Re: Girls who mold their personalities around that of their boyfriend [Re: ZippoZ]
    #6202798 -

I could never be with one of those chicks. Ever. It would disgust me to have someone's life depend entirely on what is happening in mine, and not be their own person. I wouldn't be able to respect them.


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Acid doesn't give you truths; it builds machines that push the envelope of perception. Whatever revelations came to me then have dissolved like skywriting. All I really know is that those few years saddled me with a faith in the redemptive potential of the imagination which, however flat, stale and unprofitable the world seems to me now, I cannot for the life of me shake.

-Erik Davis

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Re: Girls who mold their personalities around that of their boyfriend [Re: ZippoZ]
    #6203527 -

Girls feel, much too often, valued by the company that they keep. Not having a boyfriend when your family and friends expect you to be picking up wonderful guys can be heartwrenching, and too many girls are simply afraid of being alone because of their own self-esteem issues or those given to them by their family and their issues.

It's just frustrating all-in-all. Many times it feels like we're damned if we do and damned if we don't.

In general, the world needs more of a self-esteem boost imo.


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"Man's real life is happy,
chiefly because he is ever expecting that it soon will be so."
- Edgar Allan Poe

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Re: Girls who mold their personalities around that of their boyfriend [Re: ZippoZ]
    #6203537 -

I thought it was far more common for girls to try to mold their boyfriend the way they want.


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Re: Girls who mold their personalities around that of their boyfriend [Re: ZippoZ]
    #6203663 -

It usually happens to people afraid that a little fight or disagreement means the end of the relationship.  :rolleyes: If you think like that, you aren't mature for a long term relationship, and that's that.


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Don't dream it;be it
===================================

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Re: Girls who mold their personalities around that of their boyfriend [Re: younikrawn]
    #6203787 -

girls should do what their told... as long as they feel like it

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Re: Girls who mold their personalities around that of their boyfriend [Re: Newbie]
    #6203902 -

NewbieShroomie said:
I had one who molded herself to me, but for her benefit, not mine.  She's like a chameleon to whoever she's with.  That's what I can't stand. :mad2:



yeah thats what im getting at.

and no noone has recently broken my heart or hurt me, just musing over past relationships of my own and that of friends.


--------------------
PEACE

:mushroom2:zippoz:mushroom2:



"in times of widespread chaos and confusion, it has been the duty of more advanced human beings - artists, scientists, clowns, and philosophers - to create order. In such times as ours however, when there is too much order, too much m management, too much programming and control, it becomes the duty of superior men and women and women to fling their favorite monkey wrenches into the machinery. To relieve the repression of the human spirit, they must sow doubt and disruption"

"People do it every day, they talk to themselves ... they see themselves as they'd like to be, they don't have the courage you have, to just run with it."

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