Home | Community | Message Board


SoulSpeciosa Kratom
Please support our sponsors.

Community >> Physical and Mental Well-Being

Welcome to the Shroomery Message Board! You are experiencing a small sample of what the site has to offer. Please login or register to post messages and view our exclusive members-only content. You'll gain access to additional forums, file attachments, board customizations, encrypted private messages, and much more!

Jump to first unread post. Pages: 1
InvisibleDelyrium
lemonadeh.o.n.e.y.

Registered: 12/27/99
Posts: 5,941
Loc: vermont
Am I falling back into bad habit?
    #3857309 - 03/02/05 03:00 PM (11 years, 9 months ago)

Well... i'm not sure how to start this off. i've been seeing this guy for about 5 months. in the beginning he seemed too perfect. i felt too ugly for him, not enough for him.

i got over it. we ended up working out very well. he spoiled me with jewelry, flowers, pays for everything, takes me on vacations, etc...

let's step in my past real quick - i dated this guy for a while and he hurt me mentally. he wanted me to be anorexic... i became sick...my image warped severly. it was unhealthy and kept me damaged for a while afterwards.

i think i jumped into this new relationship too early. i was still bleeding from all the mental cuts that my ex created. i think i was just so relieved to find a guy who wasn't like him. i attached myself.

well now it's come to the point where i'm fustrated. i feel that maybe i'm falling into the same trap. same mental pain but this one is a little more unlying. i can't put my finger on it.

he never fails to tell me when i look bad - even if i think i look alright. however he gets mad at me because i have a low self esteem. he's seen me break down in tears - he's heard stories from my past of abuse and has seen me just fall apart.

i feel like im a doll - bent and shaped and not able to hold myself up.

he tells me i look pasty all the time - i went tanning for our vacation and he tells me i'm an idiot for doing that.

he pinches me, pokes me, slaps me (in his mind - playfully). i have bruises from atleast a week ago from his last poking and pinching. he knows it hurts me - but never stops.

today i told him how excited i was - i have been reading a lot and things have rushed into my head. i've opened up my creative flood gate. i need to start singing again - writing again. i also have realized some things about myself... how i view myself... how i am able to bring respect back into my own mind.

he said "what is all this shit you're talking about?"

i told him to forget it - it wasn't worth telling him. he got all mad - told me "you think you know everything". he is an "artist" ... constantly i have been supporting him, trying to keep him emerged in his artwork. now that i have a burst of these songs coming to me - he thinks i'm crazy.

but at the times that he's like this - he can also be really sweet. when i break down and cry - he turns to sweetness. he says he loves me.

im having problems here... what do i do?


--------------------
Fuck Ted Nugent he?s a fucking jerk
I wish that he?d be gone
Chauvanistic republican
Kills animals cause he
Forgot how to write a song


Post Extras: Print Post  Remind Me! Notify Moderator
InvisiblePsychoactive1984
PositiveCynicist
Male
Registered: 02/06/05
Posts: 3,546
Loc: California, Monterey Coun...
Re: Am I falling back into bad habit? [Re: Delyrium]
    #3857536 - 03/02/05 04:00 PM (11 years, 9 months ago)

Dump him, change him, talk to him, seek counseling with him, or change yourself. What are you willing to do for this person?

http://209.15.29.56/myersbriggs/mating.htm
Scroll to the bottom and read: "The Pygmalion Project"


Seems unsupprotive, abusive, and is only caring when you call him on being an asshole to you. Additionally seem to be just pulling you on a leash constantly, hey, if you like to be dragged on a leash, and to be conformed to what he wants, by all means continue. Don't stay with someone thinking that they will change for you, as it appears from what i've read, it seems like you're doing all the changes and that he's trying to conform you to be his "barbie".

Hope that actually helped and didn't seem to be trite, not my intention to be anyhow.


--------------------
"Their is one overriding question that concerns us all: How can we get out of the fatal groove we are in, the one that is leading towards the brink?" Albert Szent-Gyorgyi
"We may not be capable of eradicating the corruption of reason, but we must nevertheless counter it at every instance and with every means." Dan Agin
"Politics is the best religion and politicians are the worst followers."
-It's ok to trip as long as you don't fall.
-Substance over Style.
-Common sense is uncommon.


Post Extras: Print Post  Remind Me! Notify Moderator
InvisibleBoom
Supervisor
Male

Folding@home Statistics
Registered: 06/16/04
Posts: 11,245
Loc: Cypress Creek
Re: Am I falling back into bad habit? [Re: Delyrium]
    #3857830 - 03/02/05 05:07 PM (11 years, 9 months ago)

Hmm thats a bit tough, the thing is he probably really does enjoy being with you. Its just that he seems like a control freak, or someone that never matured emotionally. I'd personally look elsewhere for a man.

There are too many good people out there for you to be with an abusive dickhead.


Post Extras: Print Post  Remind Me! Notify Moderator
OfflineTodcasil
rogue DMT elf
Female User Gallery

Registered: 08/09/99
Posts: 16,381
Loc: Crawling on the floor...
Last seen: 2 years, 3 months
Re: Am I falling back into bad habit? [Re: Boom]
    #3858184 - 03/02/05 06:17 PM (11 years, 9 months ago)

please, let go of him.

then, go find yourself... go even deeper into yourself than you already have.

let all your wounds heal, then love will find you.

please, for yourself, drop him.

:heart: :heart: :heart:


--------------------
Men look at themselves and they see flawed humans, we look at women and we see perfect
GODDESSES
Women look at themselves and they seem utterly human, when looking at men they see proud
GODS.


~Casil



:cactus:


Post Extras: Print Post  Remind Me! Notify Moderator
OfflineLooksLikeRain
Hood

Registered: 01/29/04
Posts: 266
Loc: NE
Last seen: 4 years, 30 days
Re: Am I falling back into bad habit? [Re: Todcasil]
    #3860471 - 03/03/05 01:17 AM (11 years, 9 months ago)

I am very sorry to hear this...i to have been mentally abused by an ex...

Dump him hes not worth you can be strong be single for a while get things together pursue what you wish to do sing write be creative...


Edited by LooksLikeRain (03/03/05 01:18 AM)


Post Extras: Print Post  Remind Me! Notify Moderator
InvisibleLe_Canard
Danger Man

Registered: 05/17/03
Posts: 93,266
Loc: Earthfarm 1 Flag
Re: Am I falling back into bad habit? [Re: Boom]
    #3860516 - 03/03/05 01:30 AM (11 years, 9 months ago)

Quote:

Booooom said:
Hmm thats a bit tough, the thing is he probably really does enjoy being with you. Its just that he seems like a control freak, or someone that never matured emotionally. I'd personally look elsewhere for a man.

There are too many good people out there for you to be with an abusive dickhead.




yes, "rebound relationships" rarely work out. And, you're not going to change him, no matter what. Besides, he's putting you down to raise his own self-esteem, and no one should do that...


Post Extras: Print Post  Remind Me! Notify Moderator
OfflineUnenlightenedOne
Two Spirited

Registered: 08/12/04
Posts: 612
Last seen: 11 years, 7 days
Re: Am I falling back into bad habit? [Re: Delyrium]
    #3860967 - 03/03/05 03:16 AM (11 years, 9 months ago)

Definitely dump him.Its only going to worsen as time goes on.

Quote:

he never fails to tell me when i look bad




I love my fiancee.More than anything and anyone in existance.Nothing exists that I could love more.But I would NEVER tell her she looked bad.To me she is always the most beautiful thing in existance.Especially when she just wakes up in the morning before showering,before brushing her hair and before she puts on makeup. :grin:



Quote:

he tells me i look pasty all the time




From this and a lot of other things said.He sounds like a shallow asshole.


All in all if someone cant be supportive of you you need to move on.Especially with the past you have, you need someone nurturing and supportive.Maybe even someone who has had a bad past who can relate to and understand what you went through.They should also support your activities even if theyre not into them.

Quote:

but at the times that he's like this - he can also be really sweet. when i break down and cry - he turns to sweetness. he says he loves me.





Sorry to say this but its most likely out of guilt.If someone is sweet they are sweet most or all of the time.Not this "at times" crap.

Quote:

i felt too ugly for him, not enough for him.





Already a huge sign to move on.You wont ever get over that feeling most likely.


Quote:

he spoiled me with jewelry, flowers, pays for everything, takes me on vacations, etc...





All this means is he has plenty of money to blow.Thats it.Any pretentious bonehead with too much money can (and often they do) do this.It takes real love to give something from the heart and spend time on it even if its just a poem rather than to spend two seconds and no thought buying thoughtless gifts.


In essence what I gather is that he flashes around a lot of money and drops a lot of money (and probably thinks he's "the coolest person ever") and he puts TONS of importance on the physical perfection of the girl he dates.Seems to only take interest in his hobbies and activities and calls himself an artist.Sounds like an egomaniac to me all the way.

He sounds disgusting and misogynistic and egotistical.Like I said Dump Him.


--------------------
Do not desire to reach a high level.Rather work without thought of reward to iron out flaws and impurities in one's self for the sake of one's self.When one has done this one needs not to desire anymore. http://www.lifeforceonlinestore.com/yc/


Post Extras: Print Post  Remind Me! Notify Moderator
Offlinestefan
work in progress

Registered: 04/11/01
Posts: 8,932
Loc: The Netherlands
Last seen: 8 days, 19 hours
Re: Am I falling back into bad habit? [Re: Delyrium]
    #3861021 - 03/03/05 03:30 AM (11 years, 9 months ago)

sounds like you need time to figure yourself out in stead of being in another 'difficult' relationship. Although he is really nice to you at times and buys you tons of gifts etc you sound not really happy (from what I can get out of your post).

Quote:

today i told him how excited i was - i have been reading a lot and things have rushed into my head. i've opened up my creative flood gate. i need to start singing again - writing again. i also have realized some things about myself... how i view myself... how i am able to bring respect back into my own mind.

he said "what is all this shit you're talking about?"

i told him to forget it - it wasn't worth telling him. he got all mad - told me "you think you know everything". he is an "artist" ... constantly i have been supporting him, trying to keep him emerged in his artwork. now that i have a burst of these songs coming to me - he thinks i'm crazy.



wtf :confused: what an asshole
he should be supportive about this!
I'm not the one to tell you what to do, but it looks like this guy is no good for you. at least he could show you some support. Do what you want to do; the singing and the writing. and FUCk those who critisize you like that!


Post Extras: Print Post  Remind Me! Notify Moderator
Jump to top. Pages: 1

Community >> Physical and Mental Well-Being

Similar ThreadsPosterViewsRepliesLast post
* Hard time stopping bad habits (Weed and coffee) OddEye 1,031 9 10/02/08 02:42 PM
by MisterMuscaria
* Eating Habits Anonymous 735 9 04/22/09 09:59 PM
by Dudeyourgone
* Do you have any nervous habits?
( 1 2 all )
Signo 1,858 25 09/30/04 07:12 PM
by Society
* Kicking the cigarette habit Microcosmatrix 1,013 11 11/13/05 02:57 AM
by EonTan
* Cum = Concentrated life energy : Masturbation = V.Bad
( 1 2 3 4 all )
Mirth 15,689 79 02/10/09 10:10 PM
by daytripper23
* quitting bad habits to succeed *DELETED* encryptor 347 0 11/01/04 06:30 AM
by encryptor
* Catharsis: Good Drugs, Bad Drugs, getting my life in order Noviseer 1,574 8 05/08/04 11:52 PM
by Noviseer
* Hell & Back - Life shot to shit and I need help bad Adden 1,665 14 08/06/03 07:24 PM
by neutralizer

Extra information
You cannot start new topics / You cannot reply to topics
HTML is disabled / BBCode is enabled
Moderator: CherryBom, boO, Ped, Acidic_Sloth, ZippoZ, Rose, yogabunny, Jokeshopbeard
696 topic views. 1 members, 9 guests and 1 web crawlers are browsing this forum.
[ Toggle Favorite | Print Topic | Stats ]
Search this thread:
High Mountain Compost
Please support our sponsors.

Copyright 1997-2016 Mind Media. Some rights reserved.

Generated in 0.063 seconds spending 0.005 seconds on 15 queries.