Homeless/Lonely/Stuck for the Holidays...

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AbstractHarmonix
Love is like a train...

Registered: 07/09/04
Posts: 3,509
Loc: The Sea

Homeless/Lonely/Stuck for the Holidays...

#3344869 - 11/11/04 02:33 AM (21 years, 10 months ago)

Now normally homelessness isn't an issue for me. And even when it was, it was never a dilemma. Things are a little different this time around.

My family (mother, sister, and her daughter) are moving the day after Thanksgiving to Michigan, and leaving me here to rott. I would go with them but I was planning on starting some more classes here in Florida. If I pick up and take off to Michigan, I will have to pay out of state tuition and develop resisdency. Shitty. So right now that isnt an option. Also I am kinda stuck here in Florida cause I dont wanna leave Shroomism to rott here in Marion county, while he is waiting aorund for probation or whatever.

I have a van I can sleep in, but the keys magically vanished on a moped ride home last week, so I cant drive it. Plus it is winter and it is getting chilly, and now I sleep alone.

Someone stole my digital camera that I had just gotten back, at Harvest Fest, before I could even use it again.

Cingular Wireless is charging me 800 dollars for their own conglamorate screw-up, and turned off my cell phone.

Someone stole my djembe drum at MagFest, so now I can't even beat away my predicaments, nor practice at all really.

I got a job, at a local Greek resturaunt in town, and now I have to work this weekend. Which inevitably means I have to miss the Down on the Farm festival, Paralounge drum gathering at Suwannee, and this huge b-day bash rave at Fuel. All this weekend.

Also I dont have the title to my van, and I need to sell it and get a more gas effcient car or something.

AND LAST BUT NOT LEAST - The love of my life informed me earlier yesterday that our relationship has been changed and gone with the wind. As if I really need another person to tell me about how I am more of a "sistah" than a girlfriend. I guess i should take it as a compliment, because I always told him that I was his friend, not his BITCH, so not to treat me like one.

Maybe the kid needs bitches at this point in his life, because I am a little too intelligent to handle or something. Hey I guess it is better than him cheating on me, I just don't know wht the hell is wrong with me. I always find myself in these situations.

Maybe I should act more like a bitchy little girl, just to keep a guy in check, maybe I should bitch and cry the next time my guyfriend wants to comment about how fuckin hot my friends are and how he wants to fuck us both at the same time, instead of biting my lip.

My life is a constant comearound, and im sick of it. Why do people have to be so ridiculous? And no I am not badgering the kid who just broke up with me, I am talking in general, and even about myself.

But why did he have to cheat? And then a week or so later tell me that he doesnt want to be in a relationship. Goodness.

What really sucks is that this kid had turned into my best friend. Now what do I do? It is hard to stay around someone, when you know their feelings have changed....but they still want you around.

By opening ourselves up to our friends, emotionally as well as energetically, we are opening ourselves up to being hurt by them.

I opened myself up emotionally, and let him hurt me.
I opened myself energenitcally, and watched our entities spiral in harmony, just for he to decide he never wanted to be in a relationship in the first place.

I, Ares, have been informally MISLEAD. Thank you.

Will someone drive to Ocala and give me a hug?

--------------------
A plethora of music aspirations control my temptations of future revelations beyond "now". The percussion, and the heart beat of my love and devotion. The rhythm goes beyond, prying into the third eye, releasing the creativity held so far inside. The melodicies, through the out of tune pianos and broken classical guitars...there lies a beauty. A beauty as prevelent as the fire inside. To release these energies is pure ecstacy, to deveop these gifts is sacred. The vocality, so pure as can be, shying away from herself, lies within me. For the underlying serenitity, this is what I live for. I plea for harmony, and nothing more. Music equals love. Creation of love leads to the procreativity of the World, and it's spirals and puddles prevailing.

Extras:

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