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OfflineLoverofEarth
spirit on ajourney

Registered: 10/09/02
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Loc: the in-between
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Overcoming fear
    #1400754 - 03/22/03 03:07 PM (13 years, 8 months ago)

Certain fears are deeply rooted within us. Fear of the dark, of the unknown is the oldest fear I think. As we struggled for survival through the ages this probably remained constant. I am confronting this fear. I ride my bicycle further and further into the dark every night. It's not much, but is a start. Fear or confront? By confronting our fears do we overcome them?


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Anonymous

Re: Overcoming fear [Re: LoverofEarth]
    #1400849 - 03/22/03 04:00 PM (13 years, 8 months ago)

Confronting your fears doesn't guarantee you'll succeed in getting rid of them. Your chance of success in overcoming fear will be equal to your determination to do so. If you're looking for advice, there is one method that'll always get rid of a fear, and that's repitition. Do something a good number of times and suddenly you'll realize you're no longer scared to do it. Obviously this can't be applied to a couple things, like death. :wink: But for most things it'll work. 


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OfflineViBrAnT
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Registered: 07/30/02
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Re: Overcoming fear [Re: ]
    #1401036 - 03/22/03 05:22 PM (13 years, 8 months ago)

if you want to begin to overcum fear you should try lightly focusing on your root chakra for as long as it takes to clear your head. then after you feel better begin to focus on your breath lightly on and off to wear your mind down. on the filmstrip of your mind like your t.v, there are spaces between your thoughts/pictures. you have to learn to feel them. when you feel one you go with that, and then the next one comes, and then the next, in waves, pay attention. good luck..........


--------------------
" liken this life illusory, for your sand castle will one day be adrift amongst the wind "




Edited by ViBrAnT (03/22/03 05:29 PM)


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Offlineshaggy101
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Re: Overcoming fear [Re: LoverofEarth]
    #1401183 - 03/22/03 06:36 PM (13 years, 8 months ago)

Great post dude! :cool:

I overcame that fear the exact same way. I walked in the dark forest alone at night..if I became frightened I looked within and found strenghth, I actually found visualizing how beatiful my surroundings would be with the simple addition of the sun made me feel at home.
I eventually broke down and ran about 1.2 miles out shouting vocalizations of power and strenghth..I think the dark was scared :smirk:


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Invisibletekramrepus
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Re: Overcoming fear [Re: shaggy101]
    #1401552 - 03/22/03 09:24 PM (13 years, 8 months ago)

I agree with much said here...


One good way to overcome fear is to first contemplate the fear, and notice the reactions, feelings, and thoughts associated with it. Then, confront the fear, and keep in mind the reactions, feelings, and thoughts associated with it.

remember, its all a head trip and no fear is reality - fear itself creates no physical manifestation, only reaction to fear. fear it not a reality - its a self-created illusion that you must overcome by breaking through the patterns in which you see this fear


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InvisibleSclorch
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Re: Overcoming fear [Re: LoverofEarth]
    #1401560 - 03/22/03 09:27 PM (13 years, 8 months ago)

Fear is the mindkiller, indeed.

Ultimate fears:
Philosophy- fear of the unknown.
Psychology- fear of being alone.

Interesting how nicely those two pair up...


--------------------
Note: In desperate need of a cure...


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Invisiblexganon
polydrug abuser
Registered: 10/11/02
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Re: Overcoming fear [Re: LoverofEarth]
    #1401746 - 03/23/03 12:33 AM (13 years, 8 months ago)

Dextromethorphan (cough syrup) fucks up pain responses somehow. You still find yourself reacting in some ways, but it's hollow, and really just background noise. I have often beaten my arms and legs dexed. The sensation was unique and very pleasant, once it was divorced from our lifelong phobia of it.

Nothing's ever as bad as fear says it is. All fear is a bluff, even fear of jail, or death, or parapalegia. Calling said bluff makes it seem a little less urgent the next time.


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Please remove all dollar signs from my listed contact information


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OfflineAislingGheal
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Re: Overcoming fear [Re: shaggy101]
    #1402004 - 03/23/03 04:50 AM (13 years, 8 months ago)

Shaggy101 really hit on something for me, brought back some memories. I used to go hiking almost everyday. I live close to some extensive park land with great bridle trails, many miles of continuous trails through the woods. Sometimes I wanted to hike so bad but couldn't find free time 'till nightfall and I wouldn't go in the woods at night because I thought it potentially dangerous. I soon decided I had to hike at night, I didn't want to miss anymore hikes and I convinced myself I was being childish, after all I knew these trails like the back of my hand, whats to fear?

I'll never forget the first time I did it. I walked the trail into the woods about ten steps maybe and froze in my tracks. It was SO dark, a living total darkness, you hear things but see almost nothing but black. I couldn't go forward although I had hiked this same trail for years. The fear was in my spine and forearms like electricity, I almost ran out it was so bad, but I was determined to face this and deal with it. I told myself there was nothing to fear, this is Ohio, no animals to kill me, no human could be lurking in here without making some noise, no deadly insects, I know the trail and if I go slow I won't break a leg, so forth. I walked in slow and quite and the experience started to change after 40 minutes or so.

I noticed that my senses had become increasingly sharp and this was liberating, like a moving meditation. I never felt more present or truly grounded in nature. It was like this beautiful facet of nature was being revealed that I had never expected was there. I also found my imagination and thoughts where amplified. They would arise and seemed 3-dimensional, but did not interfere with my awareness of my surroundings.

The experience turned out so well that I had to hike alone at night at least once a week, I thought things out better on these walks, it was therapeutic.

I said all that to say this; to overcome fear you need to find acceptance of the situation, whether it's walking in a forest at night or the death of a loved one or your own mortality. All fears are smoke, just deal with the situation to the best of your ability.





--------------------

"I hate having to pick between the lesser of two evils. But I'm glad Obama was elected. McCain was another war monger. I'd rather deal with our country going into debt than trying to take on afghanistan...oh wait FUCK!" - Fungus_tao


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InvisibleRebelSteve33
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Re: Overcoming fear [Re: AislingGheal]
    #1402327 - 03/23/03 07:27 AM (13 years, 8 months ago)

Wow, cool post!!  :laugh:

I'm going to have to try the hiking at night thing!

-RebelSteve


--------------------
Namaste.


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Offlineshaggy101
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Re: Overcoming fear [Re: AislingGheal]
    #1404217 - 03/23/03 07:49 PM (13 years, 8 months ago)

Ya exactly, I am a nightwalker now. It is so peaceful now that all fear is gone.
So relative- apply

I liked how you went into detail about the feeling of fear, No matter how tough you are I think you feel it.. I beat it pretty much by realizing I am a part of it. Nice post.

Greatest fear? I think Sclorch hit it.

The more I ask the hard questions, the more afraid I become..
The more I ask the hard questions, the stronger I become for asking them.
If you know what I mean.


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Invisiblebuttonion
Calmly Watching

Registered: 04/04/02
Posts: 303
Loc: Kansas
Re: Overcoming fear [Re: LoverofEarth]
    #1405638 - 03/24/03 10:57 AM (13 years, 8 months ago)


Great thread. I am a psychotherapist right now and something a supervisor told me a while ago that has stuck in my head is ?all psychotherapy is ultimately systematic desensitization,? i.e., with increasingly strong steps, you expose the individual to that which underlies the negative feelings (whether it?s depression, anxiety, fear, or whatever else). Different therapists have different ways of doing this. Over time, one develops the ability to accept the situation as it is.

Max Headroom: Obviously this can't be applied to a couple things, like death.

Interesting. Definitely agree that we can?t kill our selves over and over until we come to accept our mortality. But a theme in a lot of writing (St. Augustine comes to mind) is that by exposing our selves to the fact that we will someday die, rather then essentially denying it like we currently do, we can not only overcome the fear of death, but live a much more authentic and fulfilling life. Maybe just by incorporating the idea of ?mortality? into your definition of you and others around you, instead of ignoring it. Although not everyone agrees that the fear of death can be overcome, there are plenty of people that do. Maybe just like most other fears, identify it, expose yourself to it, and accept it, and then laugh because it really wasn?t that bad in the first place.


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Concepts which have been proved to be useful in ordering things easily acquire such an authority over us that we forget their human origins and accept them as invariable.- Albert Einstein


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InvisibleSwami
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Re: Overcoming fear [Re: buttonion]
    #1405903 - 03/24/03 12:46 PM (13 years, 8 months ago)

There seems to be this underlying assumption that fear (not phobia) is bad.

Native Americans (and others) may get over or not have a predisposition for a fear of heights and so are great as steel workers; however they die just like the fearful when they fall.

Last year there was a "best of" Climb magazine with 20 years of breath-taking photographs for free-climbers and glacier scalers, etc. Every second or third page had the term "deceased" under the picture.

Sometimes our fears ACTUALLY serve a purpose. It is called survival.


--------------------



The proof is in the pudding.


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OfflineNoviseer
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Re: Overcoming fear [Re: Swami]
    #1406012 - 03/24/03 01:29 PM (13 years, 8 months ago)

Surfing big waves at night made surfing bigger waves during the day seem pale in comparison :smile:


--------------------
_______________________________________________________________
namaste said:
no flamz in da ODD, if you got nothing to contribute then keep yo lips zipped
_________________________________________________________________


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OfflineLoverofEarth
spirit on ajourney

Registered: 10/09/02
Posts: 206
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Re: Overcoming fear [Re: Swami]
    #1406189 - 03/24/03 02:35 PM (13 years, 8 months ago)

Fear clouds and distorts making dangerous situations life-ending.. making safe situations dangerous. You are right, you can put yourself into dangerous situations whether you are fearful of them or not. Still, we have the ability to mitigate fear consciously. Preparation of the body, mind, and soul (if you believe in such a thing, of course  :wink:) makes fear utterly useless. 


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InvisibleSwami
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Re: Overcoming fear [Re: LoverofEarth]
    #1406389 - 03/24/03 03:47 PM (13 years, 8 months ago)

...making safe situations dangerous.

If a situation is safe then it cannot by definition be dangerous. Even accepting your paradox, that would be a phobia, not a natural fear.


--------------------



The proof is in the pudding.


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OfflineMarkostheGnostic
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Re: Overcoming fear [Re: buttonion]
    #1406527 - 03/24/03 04:40 PM (13 years, 8 months ago)

Come on now, there's more than one way to skin a cat. Whereas systematic desensitization IS a particular approach to a phobia, a la Wolpe, there have also been 'implosive' therapies which inundate the person with phobic stimuli, and paradoxical treatments (V. Frankl) in which an individual attempts to intentionally enhance their symptoms, only to find the opposite response occuring. I use hypnotherapy and hypnoanalysis to uncover the forgotten event that gave rise to the symptoms. I wouldn't reduce all of these avenues to a single process. They're different approaches to be used for different types of individuals. Skinnerian behaviorism may work well with autistic kids, but I wouldn't want to inflict a high functioning adult to it.

Fear of death can be taken in an existentialist way like Irv Yalom teaches - acceptance of one's mortality, living life more fully by virtue of its end, or perhaps more wisely by the Buddhist Abhidharma psychology which takes a very close analytical look at the source of our fear - our false identification of ourselves with being an 'individual wave,' which comes into being and goes out of being, instead of identifying ourselves with the very 'Ocean of Existence.' AS BE HERE NOW puts it, one must surrender the ego to Something Higher:

"SURRENDER. What are you giving up? - A hollow little trip that's good for another 40 years at best. You're giving it up for ETERNAL UNION. PURE ENERGY & LIGHT. Because surrender means YOU NO LONGER DIE. It's as simple as that. That's what it means, because: YOU that lives and dies is YOU...EGO. And fear of death only comes through the brittleness of the EGO. TOTAL SURRENDER. There's no more YOU, no more Life and Death."

As the Good Book says: "Perfect love drives out fear.' (NIV, 1 John 4:18), so the Ultimate therapeutic response to fear is loving surrender to God. Compassion expansively overcomes the survival-based body-ego. Ken Wilber gives lots of attention to this process of transcendence and transpersonal psychology. The bottom line answer is a spiritual answer.
Peace.


--------------------
γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself


Edited by MarkostheGnostic (03/25/03 02:54 PM)


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Invisiblebuttonion
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Registered: 04/04/02
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Re: Overcoming fear [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #1406588 - 03/24/03 05:21 PM (13 years, 8 months ago)

Sorry if this is a bit tangential?


Right, good points. Maybe systematic desensitization was not the right phrase? and I didn?t mean it in the strictly behavioral sense. Maybe the exposure does not necessarily have to occur in stepwise increments, but it does occur and some sort of integration eventually takes place. Couldn?t it be said that even in hypnotherapy you are ultimately exposing them to unacknowledged, repressed emotion attached to a memory- by bringing up the memory, you arose the emotion, and some how help them integrate it.

And Yalom and Tolle are awesome. Although I am leaning more toward Tolle?s ideas.


As the Good Book says: "Perfect love drives out fear.' (NIV, 1 John 4:18), so the Ultimate therapeutic response to fear is loving surrender to God. Compassion expansively overcomes the survival-based body-ego. Ken Wilber gives lots of attention to this process of transcendence and transpersonal psychology. The bottom line answer is a spiritual answer.
Peace.


I do agree with this. However, working with lower functioning clients that aren?t necessarily seeking higher states of consciousness necessitates working within their ego system- retaining their ego and helping them to lessen the particular problem that they identify. Of course you will not always agree with their take on the problem and will lead them in directions that they did not originally conceive of, but not everyone is willing to travel to the (often very distant) point of realizing ?ego is the source of all of your difficulties? or ?live now, it?s as simple as that.?


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Concepts which have been proved to be useful in ordering things easily acquire such an authority over us that we forget their human origins and accept them as invariable.- Albert Einstein


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OfflineViking
"I've beenworking on myrr..rou..routine!"

Registered: 11/21/02
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Re: Overcoming fear [Re: buttonion]
    #1409240 - 03/25/03 05:04 PM (13 years, 8 months ago)

Go to amazon.com and look up "Fear: The Friend of Exceptional People" by Geoff Thompson. Absolutely outstanding book.

Viking


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