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Overcoming social anxiety
    #838814 -

anyone got it bad?
or overcome it?
what are your views on it?

it feels like your missing something that everyone else has..
maybe that has something to do with a childhood event... i dunno
and somehow by allowing myself to overcome it i feel like im leaving a part of me behind.. like a part of my soul..
like i feel unnatural.. or something..
i guess thats the viscious cycle im hearing about..?
my brains playing cruel tricks on me..
too often i feel like i dont know what is right and wrong.. and where i belong in my current time and space, or have a biblical sense that im doing something wrong.. like i feel like untrue morals are contradicting what my heart really feels like doing..

somethin like that
im baked
any input?


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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: Grav]
    #838828 -

Me got it bad.
It started along with E and MG seeds in my case. I have HPPD which is nothing to me. Social anxiety is bad though in my views and i suffer from it dreadfully. Some times i think it is me but other times everyone else. Lost good mates over silly shit aswell, i dont know, drugs these days. I just wish that i could be right inside an amazon jungle snorting snuff with some indian chief sometimes.
Peace.


--------------------
"They all float down here....they all float!!"
"Life is not an act, midgets are real fun"
"What you feel, it might not be"

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: Grav]
    #838837 -

Deleted by admin

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: World Spirit]
    #839321 -

but they do feel totally right and like "the real me" when i do them.. and as i act out on my obscured feelings more and more im starting to feel all-around better (that and im on medication)

its such a mindfuck though
all these bogus negative social classifications and systems that ive made up in my head because of when i felt extremely alienated from peers in the past.. its all total bullshit, yet it continues to haunt me and warp my whole world in the matter of an hour...
it feels so wrong and im trying to put my mind in a state of "letting things go" when it happens..

in the past i used to desperately search in my brain for a 'formula' if you will, of how things worked, or how all people thought and how i fit in, like a puzzle or something.. trying to cling on to an illusion.. thats totally the wrong thing to do, though
you have to just let go and your there... but its the hardest thing sometimes

i know the pieces fit

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: World Spirit]
    #839373 -

Great post enter.


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Don't worry, B. Caapi

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: Xlea321]
    #839510 -

never feel ashamed... after all, its your first time living

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: Grav]
    #839640 -

Deleted by admin

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: Grav]
    #839657 -

Do you mean that you feel uncomfortable socially in any form or just certain forms?
If any are the case then just do what i do, Think to yourself that this is your world, your life, no one can fuck with your life so if someone gives you shit or starts somet give them worse until your smacking there fucking head on the pavement (AHHHHH hu hu)
Works for me. Get on with your shit in life and your thinking.
Then again i guess i am a nutter.


--------------------
"They all float down here....they all float!!"
"Life is not an act, midgets are real fun"
"What you feel, it might not be"

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: Grav]
    #839659 -

I suggest giving up pot for a while if you are regular smoker to see if that helps. Beyond that it is practice, practice, practice. Stretch yourself. Set up an exercise to meet one new person per day. Face your fears and they will evaporate. Hide from them and they will grow.


--------------------



The proof is in the pudding.

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: Swami]
    #839665 -

On the contrary, I suffer from General Anxiety Disorder. I don't have social anxieties. I have life anxieties. I'm a worrier, basically. I have been on Effexor, Paxil and Klonopin for it. The cure for me? Marijuana. It allows me the ability to relax, when I otherwise can't. Plus, it helps me get my appetite back. Because of my anxiety, I have acid reflux, and a lot of times I just can't eat. So after I started smoking marijuana every day, I got to where I needed those pharmaceutical medications less and less. Marijuana is a whole lot easier on your liver than those drugs are. And, it's actually much cheaper!

I started noticing an increase in my panic attacks, because I was rolling every single weekend, and it was fucking with my already unstable seretonin levels. So after I backed off and regrouped and decided how I needed to treat myself to get better, I did my research and chose marijuana.

But also, it wasn't until after I tried ecstasy that I was able to open up and come to terms with a lot of things that were causing me anxiety. Then, I was able to dispel most of it and get on with my life. Everyone has self-doubt. Everyone wonders if they are normal compared to everyone else. But, who's to say what true "normal" is? The majority is not always right.

Another thing, I was up at 6am on a Sunday after an intense night of rolling. I was flipping through the channels trying to come down, and I stopped on one of those televised church services. I paused for a moment to catch the topic (I am a very strong Christian), and it was about worrying. The preacher said, "Worrying is a sin. It shows a lack of faith in God." So from then on, anytime I would start to worry or panic, I would remind myself that I need to rely on my faith and immediately the anxiety would disappear. So, it all ties in together......and life is the same exact way. It just all ties in together coming from different places. Life is hard, but it is harmonious.


--------------------
_________________________________________________

Fuck this......let's go smoke a bowl.

"Weed will get you through times of no money better than money will get you through times of no weed."  --Freewheelin' Franklin

"Life is not all....flowers and sausages!"

I <heart> Joe!

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: Grav]
    #839742 -

I know I shouldn't rely on drugs to help with SAD, but ephedrine pills(you can buy them at any convienence store) or better yet speed are good for that. Of course alcohol doesn't hurt. Meditation is good. I don't know.











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--------------------------------


Mp3 of the month: The Mamas & the Papas - Strange Young Girls


Edited by Learyfan (07/18/10 07:42 PM)

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: Learyfan]
    #839751 -

Deleted by admin

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: Swami]
    #839784 -

I suggest giving up pot for a while if you are regular smoker to see if that helps. Beyond that it is practice, practice, practice. Stretch yourself. Set up an exercise to meet one new person per day. Face your fears and they will evaporate. Hide from them and they will grow.

This is very sound advice. I am a high introvert and despise people in general and groups of people in particular. Let me explain this. I like people individually but people as an overall entity make me sick. Groups of people are panicky, have a mob mentality, and are dangerous. One of the hats I wear is that of an analyst/consultant. In that occupation I have to attend group functions and mix with all sorts of people. At first I was very shy and did not mix very well but I found, over time, that continuing to attend the events and mixing with people has left me adept at it. It did not happen over night but I do not have near the social anxiety that I once did.

As Swami said, "Stretch yourself."

Good luck.

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: Grav]
    #843219 -

Sometimes I'm okay, but lots of times I get it really really bad... I was actually going to make a post about this, but it looks like you beat me to it.




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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: Grav]
    #843348 -

Don't worry too much about it. Like Jung said, all of his most important experiences were to do with exploration of his inner self.


--------------------
Don't worry, B. Caapi

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: Xlea321]
    #843622 -

Oh yea
What are all your views on anti-depressant/social anxiety medication?
i was on it for awhile then for some reason i felt wrong by taking it and got off it and got really messed up in the head
im back on it now and feeling open-mindedly stable for perhaps the first time in my life..

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: Grav]
    #843866 -

I've always had a hard time accepting anti-depressant and anxiety medications as a valid solution to one's problems. It seems to me that these medications serve only to mask the underlying subconscious issues that are creating these emotional difficulties. By masking these issues, you are simply giving them more strengh, and when you stop taking these meds...BAM! It's suddenly many times worse than it was before you went on the medication. I've been told that anxiety/depression is a result of chemical imbalances, but I've always believed that all emotions, negative and positive, are a result of fluctuations in one's neurochemistry. I've never been on depression/anxiety medication myself, but I don't consider continuous drug use (legal or illegal) to be an appropriate solution to one's problems. To me, these meds are just another example of societies need for a quick fix and easy money.


--------------------
Stand up for your freedoms, join the fight against the War on Drugs!

www.drcnet.org
www.drugpolicyalliance.org
www.drugsense.org

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: Grav]
    #844000 -

I've always found mushrooms to have a powerful long-term anti-depressant effect but if you need other things then by all means use them.


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Don't worry, B. Caapi

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: Xlea321]
    #844059 -

Mushrooms are the answer to a lot of things.




--------------------
What if everything around you
Isn't quite as it seems?
What if all the world you think you know,
Is an elaborate dream?
And if you look at your reflection,
Is it all you want it to be?


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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: Murex]
    #844143 -

Very very true. Psycedelics are PROOF OF GOD in my opinon!!!!!!

I too have had a bad childhood. The bitch knew that i could get her for physical abuse so she TORTURED ME MENTALLY!!!!!!!!!!!

I listen to the inner god! So far its help me! (with mushrooms its a easy way of activatiing the inner god)


--------------------
And the gameshow host rings the buzzer (brrnnntt) oh and now you get a face full of face!

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: johnnyfive]
    #845086 -

shit im agreeing with swami for once....;]
yes overcoming your fears and doing one thing you wouldnt normally do every day is a good principle to live by.....

and like 420 girl said, e is good for the realisation of a lot of issues and i wouldnt change my experiences with it, but i think long term heavy use of marijuana, e and various other psychoactives can get you on a level too deep for ordinary social interaction, you start to feel misplaced around others, and can be misunderstood by your closest friends... yep its the same old story some people can take it and continue a normal existence and some people cant..
it took me a while to come round , and at the end of it all, you think how stupid you were in the first place, but at the time, its serious, and you want it to stop, and if your wondering why your mind is so confusing, and you want some consistency, then lay off the altered routine, ie: drugs, fucked up sleeping patterns etc. get outside get some exercise, eat healthily and give it a month or so and you might be surprised like i was

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: Grav]
    #845808 -

Swami gave the best advice here IMO. Confront as many fears as you can. Just walk through the fear and do/say what you want. Just don't fear the consequences of social interactions; it's never as bad as you think. Only once in a great while will you regret speaking out. Looking like an idiot in public used to be my absolute greatest fear. Being shy and awkward for years was much worse than any embarrasing moment could be. Learn to identify instances where fear is making a decision for you, and remind yourself that it is YOUR life and you can do whatever the fuck you please.

But no matter what, nothing will change unless you force yourself to directly confront your fears. Just think of something you wish you could do (ie walk up to a chick and say high), then imagine what it would be like if you had done it. Then just do it looking as confident as possible. Don't give yourself a chance to chicken out or rationalize your way out of it, JUST START WALKING. Throw yourself into those situations and soon you'll realize there is nothing to fear. That kind of fear is an illusion, I swear. You've just conditioned yourself to fear the consequences, probably because you suffered them as an impressionable child long ago. Since you let fear make the decision every time, the idea of not being afraid and just going ahead with it seems unacceptable. I know my anxiety used to stem back to a childhood event, and it took a lot of fearless actions to get rid of it.


--------------------
Welcome evermore to gods and men is the self-helping man.  For him all doors are flung wide: him all tongues greet, all honors crown, all eyes follow with desire.  Our love goes out to him and embraces him, because he did not need it.

~ R.W. Emerson, "Self-Reliance"

:heartpump:

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: WhiskeyClone]
    #846052 -

At age 28 I went from being a total computer geek into management with a crew of 50; some twice my age. At the weekly meetings, there would be sweat running down my arms as I struggled to not look down or mumble. After 3 or 4 of those episodes with the world not coming to an end, I started to believe that I was a leader and speaker and I fit the role well.

Create a new self image and grow into it.


--------------------



The proof is in the pudding.

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: Grav]
    #847353 -

Have you ever taken the Myers-Briggs test? If not I suggest trying it as a starter, not to change but to understand yourself. I am introverted and rarely initiate conversations, especially with women, outside of a work environment. I have a job that requires me to "act" like an extrovert and that I was able to achieve with practice but I am still an introvert which means that I am drained in most social settings, not that I have something wrong with me. I'm wired different if you will. I am most concerned with meeting and interacting with women, in social settings, because that is what is most meaningful to me, deep down inside (I feel good about being attractive and wanted by women as well as my desire to get laid). What I have done is start by looking directly at them, try to get into their eyes. If they don't say anything, I usually won't and accept that I may have missed an opportunity to talk or be friends or maybe even get laid, who knows. The point is that I can't be both yin and yang, that is why I seek companionship from women. I want and strive for acceptance and love, especially from women. First I must remind myself that no matter what happens that I am worthy of acceptance and love, first from myself and second from people I meet.


--------------------
"New shit has come to light..."

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: Grav]
    #847359 -

Oh, BTW, it never really gets easy. It is always a bit of a chore but so is cutting the grass and I really feel good afterwards.
Ciao!


--------------------
"New shit has come to light..."

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: GRTUD]
    #850252 -

Ya, Im a lot like you. Im Inrovert, but Ive forced myself to become extrovert in many situations in work and socially. Im the same way about women, and I always try to get eye signals before approachig a woman further.

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: Grav]
    #12916784 -

i had it bad about 4 years ago to the point where id feel dizzy and on the verge of passing out if i was forced into a situation where i was around people, i still have a lot of trouble talking face to face to people i feel very shifty and like i need to get away from them, I've always had a strange issue with making eye contact with people while i speak to them, even my parents, it feels like staring into someones eyes while talking to them is making some kind of a strange emotional connection that feels inappropriate.

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: kieran]
    #12916802 -

difficult as a mutha fucka...... being shy is involunatry:sadyes:


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EVERYTHING EVENTUALLY BECOMES A DESERT


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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: Salomon]
    #12916897 -

This thread is 8 years old. You could have started a new one...

Anyway, if you want to fix social anxiety look into NEUROPLASTICITY. It's the theory that you can completely rewire who you are through thinking and experience, and that we do this involuntarily on a day to day basis, wiring ourselves up to be someone we do or do not want to be. It's a very 'obvious' type theory - I mean, classical conditioning is basically this neuroplasticity at work.

You also wire yourself to get addicted to emotions. So eventually you WANT to be stressed out in a social situation because it feels more natural. Your cells start to crave it.

I'm overcoming social anxiety at the moment, and all I do is assert to myself that there is no reason to wonder or think about things, that I already have what I need, I don't need to think to get it, so I don't need others' approval on anything, and that any thinking could be wholly inaccurate - ie. I could completely create a hostile world in a town that has zero crime, just by expecting bad things to happen.

tldr; relax and stay that way.


--------------------
My solitude...
My shield...
My armour...

TESTED
WITH
FULL
FORCE

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: circastes]
    #12916920 -
Log in to view attachment

Here's the PDF about neuroplasticity I'm reading at the moment. Very interesting even if you have no problems (unlikely!)


--------------------
My solitude...
My shield...
My armour...

TESTED
WITH
FULL
FORCE

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: circastes]
    #12916946 -

circastes said:
This thread is 8 years old. You could have started a new one...


:lol:  I love these epic bumps.  It's weird seeing my post from so long ago.  I'm advocating ephedrine pills, speed (adderall) and alcohol to help with SAD.  God.  Dumb.  I was right about the meditation.  One out of four aint bad.










--------------------
--------------------------------


Mp3 of the month: The Mamas & the Papas - Strange Young Girls


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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: kieran]
    #12917015 -

kieran said:
i had it bad about 4 years ago to the point where id feel dizzy and on the verge of passing out if i was forced into a situation where i was around people, i still have a lot of trouble talking face to face to people i feel very shifty and like i need to get away from them, I've always had a strange issue with making eye contact with people while i speak to them, even my parents, it feels like staring into someones eyes while talking to them is making some kind of a strange emotional connection that feels inappropriate.



Everyone is a mess imo. Remember that and don't be fooled. Everyone has trouble living imo. Having compassion for your self is a great help. Having compassion for being a mess and having compassion for the rest of humanity even in the midst of self loathing and fear of others. Compassion for all of it. Over and over and over again. :heart: It's something I work on. I try to have compassion for myself when I can't feel any.


--------------------
"Don't believe everything you think". -Anom.

" All that lives was born to die"-Anom.

With much wisdom comes much sorrow,
The more knowledge, the more grief.
Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: Learyfan] * 1
    #12917103 -

:shineon::peace::shineon:

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Re: Overcoming social anxiety [Re: World Spirit]
    #13022454 -

Stop smoking weed and start drinking alchohal.

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General Interest > Philosophy, Sociology & Psychology
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