Chubba said:

Quote:

like Brave New World?

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I want to live in the universe created in Brave New World.

Encouraged to have promiscuous sex and dosed up with the best drug known to man, doesn't seem bad to me.

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Gumby said:

If I had a kid that pulled out their hair during temper tantrums I'd probably zip-tie their wrists behind their back... Then the kid would probably be picked up by child protective services shortly after. I'd be a horrible dad, that's why I'm not having kids.

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indigo_shades said:

Ok so i am in a relationship with a women who already has a daughter from a previous bf.  Her daughter is out of control and destroys the house as well as throws huge tantrums throwing herself around, throwing things and hitting us everytime she doesnt get her way or she loses her pascifier which she should be almost off of.
We are trying to break her of staying out of stuff, turning off the tv just cause spongebob isnt on, throwing these tantrums and one method we use is smacking her hand. 

I believe she is a little bit young to get spanked but she understands when shes doing something wrong i say your goin to your room and she says no cause i did it a few times and locked her up so she knows what i mean but if i do lock her up shes only good for like 5 minutes sometimes then back at it.  The only problem is she screams and crys for her pascifier or that her diaper is wet or anything she can to get mommy to come let her out and baby her then shes walking all over us again destroying things around the house and acting nuts especially when we dont give her everything she wants. 

I told my fiance she needs to be locked in her room to cry herself to sleep then she will realize that will happen every time she hits, throws things and throws her self around pulling her hair and acting nuts.  This kid is nuts for a 2 year old and i think its only cause mom gives her everything she wants and we are talkin bout a 2 year old with her own playstation big tv and more toys than i ever had as a kid and she hardly plays with them rips the playstation cord out and turns off the tv to come yell at us to put on what she wants in the living room.  now we do let her watch tv in the living room most of the day but she needs to learn her room is her room and the living room is the adult room so we can watch something other than spongebob sometimes.

  For all parents out reading this did you get locked up in your room as a kid and if you had a kid this hard to control would you do my method and teach her she gets locked in her room everytime she acts wild?  I believe since she is now at learning age she needs to know you dont get everything you want in life just cause you throw a tatrum rippin your hair out, hitting people and throwing things and i do just threatin lockin her up mostly but i think she really needs it sometimes.  Am i doing it right by locking her in her room?  Should she be locked in her room to cry herself to sleep to realize nobody is coming to baby her everytime she does act nuts?

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indigo_shades said:

Gumby said:

If I had a kid that pulled out their hair during temper tantrums I'd probably zip-tie their wrists behind their back... Then the kid would probably be picked up by child protective services shortly after. I'd be a horrible dad, that's why I'm not having kids.

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lol sometimes i feel like this but i couldnt EVER bring myself to do something like that.  We are agreeing now to punish her more and maybe use the stand in the corner method too, which i dont thing will work but we will try.

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actually i remember my mom did this with me she'd stick me in the living room corner and keep her eye on me and i'd have to stay longer if i sat down, looked away from the corner, etc.... i fuckin hated standing there cross eyed listening to soaps

smokeybear said:

Bipolardox said:

I assume you would like to avoid child protective services and what not, My wife and I have 3 kids, 18 month daughter, and two boys 3 and 5 both from a previous (and very abusive)ex, by abusive i mean he bit and drew blood from the youngest when he was about 8 months old, befor the ages of 1 they would be put into the bath tup fully clothed, shower on, Ah hows that bad? no warm water. just freezing cold shower for 2 to 15 min depending on whet they did and how mad or methed out the dad was. anyway, he got in nice and deep with heroin being one of his "lighter" chioces, haven't heard from him in a couple years, ... onward. the boys throw tantrums in the stores, screaming and crying, I'm 28, so, picture a 28 year old guy, sitting in the basket of a shopping cart at safeway arm around a screaming child, and pretending to cry right al;ong with him. note these things drove me nuts with the oldest, not I see they're phases that thank GOD they outgrow. Si, why not have fun with it, throw humility right out the window. when they throww a fit, I cry right along with em (they absolutely loath it, and it makes it fun for me, so they stop, almost immediately. When they pout, I make it a point not to look at them, use perepheral viision, when they look at u (2c if your looking) abruptly turn your back, chair and all away. Again it's not their desired effect, so they stop, spankings open havd swat on the bum, last resort. I used to spray my cat with water when I caught her doing something wrong, and guess what, Kids hate it too! especially when they are in bed and talking after repeated warnings to stop, then their pillow is wet, their hair's wet, just terrible, now all I do is shake the bottle so they can hear it, and wah la! I know, what did these poor kids do in another life to get stuck with a dad like me?

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this and pris#1 last comment to this one are the best advice in the whole thread.

i remember when i was a little kid, i tried to throw a temper tantrum to get something.  well as soon as i got hissy, started crying, etc, my mom walked away from me and i followed her and she kept saying "who's kid is this??"  like she didn't want me anymore for a few isles in the store.  i only tried it once and it never happened again.

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Senor_Doobie said:

  I'm not a perent but it seems to me that consistency is the key to it...that and making sure the kid understands why he/she is being punished.

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indigo_shades said:

well we came to more agreements on how to punish her and make her understand things and today we practiced on it a little bit.  She seems to be a little bit more calm today than the past few times and locking her up is starting to work along with the occasional hand slap or spanking.

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A marriage counselor told me that each argument leaves a scar, it may no longer bleed, but the scar will always remain as a reminder, and the key to making a relationship work, is the ability for both parties to compromise. If the 2 of work together you will come to agreeable methods of discipline.  As for the marriage? what would I know, shortly after the counselor gave us those words of wisdom, we got a divorce. Still good advice though

norml840 said:

throat chop will do the trick.  quick, fast, and hard.  right on the adam's apple.

no, but seriously.  discipline must be consistent.  no "giving in".  it may take time and it will be hard for mom to bear.  mom may not allow what she thinks to be cruel.  if this is the case i would get out of the relationship or be prepared for a long hard life with a spoiled brat.

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haha parenting skill learned on the Shroomery! Whats next??

inSense said:

like Brave New World? seriously?

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Quote:

If you feel the best drug known to man fits in the category anti-depressants what bring you to the shroomery?

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indigo_shades said:

Ok so i am in a relationship with a women who already has a daughter from a previous bf.  Her daughter is out of control and destroys the house as well as throws huge tantrums throwing herself around, throwing things and hitting us everytime she doesnt get her way or she loses her pascifier which she should be almost off of.
We are trying to break her of staying out of stuff, turning off the tv just cause spongebob isnt on, throwing these tantrums and one method we use is smacking her hand. 

I believe she is a little bit young to get spanked but she understands when shes doing something wrong i say your goin to your room and she says no cause i did it a few times and locked her up so she knows what i mean but if i do lock her up shes only good for like 5 minutes sometimes then back at it.  The only problem is she screams and crys for her pascifier or that her diaper is wet or anything she can to get mommy to come let her out and baby her then shes walking all over us again destroying things around the house and acting nuts especially when we dont give her everything she wants. 

I told my fiance she needs to be locked in her room to cry herself to sleep then she will realize that will happen every time she hits, throws things and throws her self around pulling her hair and acting nuts.  This kid is nuts for a 2 year old and i think its only cause mom gives her everything she wants and we are talkin bout a 2 year old with her own playstation big tv and more toys than i ever had as a kid and she hardly plays with them rips the playstation cord out and turns off the tv to come yell at us to put on what she wants in the living room.  now we do let her watch tv in the living room most of the day but she needs to learn her room is her room and the living room is the adult room so we can watch something other than spongebob sometimes.

  For all parents out reading this did you get locked up in your room as a kid and if you had a kid this hard to control would you do my method and teach her she gets locked in her room everytime she acts wild?  I believe since she is now at learning age she needs to know you dont get everything you want in life just cause you throw a tatrum rippin your hair out, hitting people and throwing things and i do just threatin lockin her up mostly but i think she really needs it sometimes.  Am i doing it right by locking her in her room?  Should she be locked in her room to cry herself to sleep to realize nobody is coming to baby her everytime she does act nuts?

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Sounds like you have a big problem on your hands, a child .

Don't lock her in her room, that will just increase her anxiety and lead to more problems. Children work on a more 'basic' level of fear-gratitude response.

If she is still using a pacifier I imagine she is not older than 2 right? If she is you should start _weening_ her off it.

Establish rules (simple ones!). If she starts acting out, and it's obvious, tell her to calm down count down from a number (5 for example) and once you reach that number take her, gently but securely, in your arms and take her to a time out spot (decide on one from the beginning, her bed works well). Sit her down and wait a few seconds until she calms down and instruct her simply and clearly "You can come back once you calm down and you're ready to act better."

Once she understands this message leave, she should come back much calmer.

The first few time's it will take constant re-sets because it will be new to her. Just keep doing it in a constant and calm manner and believe me she will get it.

Children are naturally seeking boundaries and you just have to set them. A belt will more painful manner but not necessary. Once you establish the rules they will be followed.

Just make sure the rules are constantly followed in a consistent and rational manner. Remember it _is_ a child and will act out, just the nature of a child. The child is seeking boundaries.