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Re: The Relationship Building Mind Games....? [Re: Veritas]
    #8608647 -

Veritas said:
I am not interested in men who are desperate to be with me, nor men who have not developed their own lives. 

The guy who would "catch my eye" is the one who openly and respectfully demonstrates his interest in my mind and body.  The guys who play games & act aloof are not attractive to me.



Thanks for that. You support my point well. :thumbup:


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Word to your mom.

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Re: The Relationship Building Mind Games....? [Re: BrainChemistry]
    #8608664 -

If that is your point, why were you claiming that subconscious and genetic factors mean more than personal insight?  :confused:

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Re: The Relationship Building Mind Games....? [Re: Veritas]
    #8608706 -

I didn't say that they mean more. I'm saying that those things influence your personal insight. There is no way around it.

Subconsciously, we are all attracted to those people who seem to have life figured out, and who seem to want to share that with us. Why? Because thats what drives our reproduction. Females want a capable male so they know that safety and security will be provided, and males want a capable female that can raise and care for their children. So its been since the dawn of reproduction.

You don't THINK about these things when you are trying to find a relationship, I'm saying its subconscious. These are the things that drive your desires and your interests.


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Word to your mom.

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Re: The Relationship Building Mind Games....? [Re: BrainChemistry]
    #8608771 -

I'm attracted to girls who look like they don't have *shit* figured out. Dunno why. My girlfriend can be a whack job sometimes when it comes to her emotions (I usually assume that it's that time of month though).

I don't know, I'm not sure it's entirely healthy, she calls it the Knight in Shining Armor Syndrome, which she turns into "kiss-ass". :undecided: My best friend calls it LDS- Lonely Dick Syndrome, lol.


--------------------
Captain Cannabis, Guardian of Ganja, Sultan of Shrooms, Giver of Green, Tabbed Tripper, and all around Good Guy.

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Re: The Relationship Building Mind Games....? [Re: WornTraveler]
    #8608900 -

Maybe you see something in them other people don't, and feel like you can help them? I'm definitely attracted to girls I consider "simple" or "innocent" just because I think they have a lighter view of life than most people do, and that makes me happy. But I also like girls who aren't afraid to think about their life and their situations, and talk about deep shit with me.

Life can be so complicated sometimes. :shrug:


--------------------
Word to your mom.

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Re: The Relationship Building Mind Games....? [Re: BrainChemistry]
    #8608950 -

BrainChemistry said:
Females want a capable male so they know that safety and security will be provided, and males want a capable female that can raise and care for their children.


Seven billion of us and you've figured out what every single one of us wants. :cuckoo:

:muahaha:


--------------------
:redpanda:
If I should die this very moment
I wouldn't fear
For I've never known completeness
Like being here
Wrapped in the warmth of you
Loving every breath of you
:heartpump: :bunnyhug: :yinyang:

:yinyang: :levitate: :earth: :levitate: :yinyang:

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Re: The Relationship Building Mind Games....? [Re: fireworks_god]
    #8608992 -

fireworks_god said:
BrainChemistry said:
Females want a capable male so they know that safety and security will be provided, and males want a capable female that can raise and care for their children.


Seven billion of us and you've figured out what every single one of us wants. :cuckoo:

:muahaha:


I'm talking only about base instincts and pre-programming. I was generalizing the words "female" and "male" to pretty much any species, not just humans.


--------------------
Word to your mom.

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Re: The Relationship Building Mind Games....? [Re: BrainChemistry]
    #8609050 -

BrainChemistry said:
I didn't say that they mean more. I'm saying that those things influence your personal insight. There is no way around it.

Subconsciously, we are all attracted to those people who seem to have life figured out, and who seem to want to share that with us. Why? Because thats what drives our reproduction. Females want a capable male so they know that safety and security will be provided, and males want a capable female that can raise and care for their children. So its been since the dawn of reproduction.

You don't THINK about these things when you are trying to find a relationship, I'm saying its subconscious. These are the things that drive your desires and your interests.


What does being capable have to do with being dishonest and manipulative?  A capable male, by my definition, would be someone who is honest and straightforward, and who has enough self-confidence to deal with people directly (rather than playing stupid games). 

Perhaps you are not arguing for the ridiculous mind-games proposed by the seduction community, but rather for some other means of relating to the opposite sex?

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Re: The Relationship Building Mind Games....? [Re: BrainChemistry]
    #8609059 -

*valley girl voice*

Um, Yah...  This thread is really bad.  *giggle*



if you are interested in attracting and developing a relationship with a deep, sensitive, insightful woman, you'll need to quit climbing trees & acting like a nut.

I WILL FIND A NUT, DAMMNIT...  Seeds er weeds, bitches.:lol:


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Re: The Relationship Building Mind Games....? [Re: WornTraveler]
    #8609403 -

I also do not condon this style of dating, and prefer honest and sincere people and relationships.  Ive learned and am still learning that self improvement leads to healthy self cofindence wich leads to fruitful reltaionships, instead of acting like i am self confident I work on becomeing self cofident, and through that work a worthwhile person can emerge.  I do think poeople who tend to fall for the mind games are naive, young, and inexpierienced in my opinion.

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Re: The Relationship Building Mind Games....? [Re: cottlestonpie]
    #8609506 -

Mind gamers are fun to fuck with a little and shake em up.  Not to be an asshole.  Kinda funny.  Two sarcastic comments in the right places and...  What...??  A flash of innocence...??  Doh..?!


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Re: The Relationship Building Mind Games....? [Re: PhanTomCat]
    #8609853 -

You see, we humans, generally RUN from what chases and pursues us. Familiarity breeds contempt. In this case, you are the selectee, she is the selector. She is being pursued, you have/are done/doing the pursuing. Lovers are pursued, providers do the pursuing. Don't be a provider

As far as normal game playing relationships go he is giving good advice. So if you want to play the game and get everything that goes with that and be a player yourself then pay attention.

On the other hand if you want to really find a friend and develop a serious loving relationship disregard all that crap and always speak your mind. The downside is there are not very many people who can play the being real game and so you may spend a lot of time waiting. Then I hope you enjoy your own company.


--------------------
"Don't believe everything you think". -Anom.

" All that lives was born to die"-Anom.

With much wisdom comes much sorrow,
The more knowledge, the more grief.
Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC

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Re: The Relationship Building Mind Games....? [Re: Icelander]
    #8610126 -

Icelander said:
You see, we humans, generally RUN from what chases and pursues us. Familiarity breeds contempt. In this case, you are the selectee, she is the selector. She is being pursued, you have/are done/doing the pursuing. Lovers are pursued, providers do the pursuing. Don't be a provider
.
As far as normal game playing relationships go he is giving good advice. So if you want to play the game and get everything that goes with that and be a player yourself then pay attention.
.
On the other hand if you want to really find a friend and develop a serious loving relationship disregard all that crap and always speak your mind. The downside is there are not very many people who can play the being real game and so you may spend a lot of time waiting. Then I hope you enjoy your own company.


See that's the thing, this is all kinda~ new to me - I am not the "player" type....
My parents were always the model for what I considered "normal"....
They were open and honest about feelings and such, and they are still together - always "seemed" like the winning combination....
So, this being my model of "normality" as I grew up, it is the mindset I adopted, and the way that I am now and have always been....
But, thru all of this and thru the years, something doesn't seem to be working for me....

I know the waiting game, I know what it is like to be alone, and I am fine with it....
That doesn't mean that I don't desire to change that status....
The two fold ironic part is that I feel the most "confident" when I am in a relationship - at exactly the time when it seems the wrong time to have it....    :rolleyes:
That is the time when all of the opportunities seem to come out of the woodwork - even though not looking for them....

I don't know if I could pull off being the cocky arrogant type - it really just isn't me....
My humor is already a little askew, but I also seem to have the dreaded "nice guy" tag.....  :whoa:
But hey, I open doors for perfect strangers, why wouldn't I extend a "common courtesy" like this to someone I care about....?    :shrug:

Then I see stuff like the women that are in relationships that get abused and/or beaten, yet they absolutely won't leave that relationship because "I LOVE HIM"....    :puke:
So, one can't exactly ignore the fact that cockiness and arrogance does seem to have some kind of hypnotic effect on a large portion of people/women....

Was just looking for other's take on this, as I don't seem to have a clue any more....
Maybe I need to find another confident roommate, as confidence seems to be somewhat contagious....    :lol:    :shrug:


>^;;^<


--------------------
I'll be your midnight French Fry....  :naughty:

"The most important things in life that are often ignored, are the things that one cannot see...."
>^;;^<

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Re: The Relationship Building Mind Games....? [Re: PhanTomCat]
    #8610379 -

there's so many ways we humans play these games

who is the more intellectual, spiritual, witty, outgoing, attractive, creative, etc...

we all play some version of our own games, whether we know it or not... regardless of how "real" we think we are

pretty hard to escape this mentality, having grown up in a game world

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Re: The Relationship Building Mind Games....? [Re: deranger]
    #8610723 -

synthetic mind great proposition, and sig :wink:

Icelander, i didn't clarify what I meant by the lover pursuer. i'm basically just saying don't pursue a specific woman too much. Don't get me wrong, I pursue women, please believe it, but I don't pursue them to the point they get tired of me trying to get at them so much anymore. I realized years back when I was younger, I would try to pursue a specific girl too much, and she would get tired of it, and I assume a little annoyed as well. and therefor in those situations, once again, FAMILIARITY BREEDS CONTEMPT.

In my experience, pursuing a woman too much will subcommunicate that you are a needy, clingy and desperate guy with little or no game looking for approval and affection.

and brain chemistry layed it out well with the whole self confidence thing. As any girl what they look for in a guy, and chances are the 1st or 2nd thing they say is "confidence"...

I feel it is plausible to say that if you can develop firm self-confidence, and the ability to identify high-status people(in a social sense) as well as develop and exude high-status mindset(thus, walkng into every situation expecting to be one of the high status people there) everywhere you go, everything will fall into place.


--------------------
"Life lived in the absence of the psychedelic experience that primordial shamanism is based on is life trivialized, life denied, life enslaved to the ego."

"You teach the world how to treat you, by showing the world how you treat yourself."

A well developed sense of humor is far superior to any religion"

"Everything you could want and could be, you already have and are."

:peace: & :heart:

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Re: The Relationship Building Mind Games....? [Re: Veritas]
    #8611357 -

Veritas said:
I did not say that people were not influenced by other factors, but rather that the stupid seduction games proposed here were geared towards attracting a certain type of female.

Why do the behaviors/attitudes you propose have to be an either/or?  I am not interested in men who are desperate to be with me, nor men who have not developed their own lives. 

The guy who would "catch my eye" is the one who openly and respectfully demonstrates his interest in my mind and body.  The guys who play games & act aloof are not attractive to me.

How does telling a woman that you have strong feelings for her = unattractive desperation?  The "opposite" behaviors you've proposed are NOT what the seduction community teaches men.  Respect has NOTHING to do with manipulation nor mind-games.

The idea of "keeping your power" is central to the seduction community, and it involves being dishonest and manipulative, while suppressing all of your natural inclination to behave in a loving manner towards the woman you love.  :thumbdown:

Again, if you want to catch "squirrels," feel free to climb that tree & act like a nut.  The non-squirrely women will pass you by in favor of the man who acts like a human being, and treats them as people & not puppets.


Thank you!

:lighter: :heart:


--------------------
Goodbye Shroomery.

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Re: The Relationship Building Mind Games....? [Re: PhanTomCat]
    #8611948 -

Then I see stuff like the women that are in relationships that get abused and/or beaten, yet they absolutely won't leave that relationship because "I LOVE HIM"....    :puke:

This has nothing to do with love. This is addiction and fear and self loathing generated from poor childhood development.

As to your case, as in salvation in general, you will have to work yours out like the rest of us. Good luck. ( some luck never hurts)


--------------------
"Don't believe everything you think". -Anom.

" All that lives was born to die"-Anom.

With much wisdom comes much sorrow,
The more knowledge, the more grief.
Ecclesiastes circa 350 BC

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Re: The Relationship Building Mind Games....? [Re: Icelander] * 1
    #8611959 -

Icelander said:
Then I see stuff like the women that are in relationships that get abused and/or beaten, yet they absolutely won't leave that relationship because "I LOVE HIM"....    :puke:

This has nothing to do with love. This is addiction and fear and self loathing generated from poor childhood development.




Exactly!

I dont know my mother, and all of my dads other wives were pieces of shit that did nearly every abusive thing possible to try and get rid of me. When I got older I subconsciously sought out abusive women in order to feel love. I was completely miserable until I realized what I was doing and corrected myself. Luckily we human beings are excellent at adaptation, a bad childhood is never a reasonable excuse to act like a fool.


--------------------
The Prophecy!

Learn To Code

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Re: The Relationship Building Mind Games....? [Re: hoopershroomer]
    #8612554 -

hoopershroomer said:
Its not even about being completely cocky and arrogant. it's about being cocky/arrogant AND FUNNY.



No no no, Man you have been watching to many self help dvds imo.

Those things that you are telling ppl they need to be to be are summed up in one word.

Confidence.

If people are woried about childish little mind games like that how are they ever going to be confident in themselves.

Sure you may gat some attention from like minded women who are on the same game playing level, But really whats the point in that?

If you face up to who you are and accept it rather than trying to appear otherwise you will radiate confidence and attraction that shadows mind games.


it's about being cocky/arrogant AND FUNNy:lol:

Imo this just shows that ppl are insecure and tring to compensate


Although thats just my opinion, Go with what works for you man:thumbup:

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Re: The Relationship Building Mind Games....? [Re: PhanTomCat]
    #8614312 -

Where are the frappuchino glasses chicks at, damn.:what:  Woot.


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