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Colon Purge
    #8013511 -

Alright so here's the deal. I ate some really spicy food today, the kind with the crushed red peppers and all. I LOVE spicy food, but I make an effort to not eat it on days where I have to wake up early the next mourning and I don't have time to shit my brains out for an hour. Tomorrow is one of those days where I don't have the time, and I don't want to have to go into school and shit my brains out there, so I was thinking about getting something today that will make me shit my brains out so tomorrow I won't have that problem. Get it? So what I need to know how is what are good cheap effective ways of going about doing this? What is the best colon cleanser type thing? How long do they usually take to work? I want to go and get whatever I need and do this within the next few hours. Thanks.

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Re: Colon Purge [Re: Innominate]
    #8013516 -

haven't you ever heard of a laxative?

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Re: Colon Purge [Re: 0xYg3n]
    #8013553 -

A Laxative?!?!? Noooooo, never heard of such a thing :rolleyes:

No shit sherlock, yes I've heard of a laxative. What I'm asking is what are some good, preferably all natural ones, and how long to they take to work.

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Re: Colon Purge [Re: Innominate]
    #8013572 -

how about some strong coffee

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Re: Colon Purge [Re: stefan]
    #8013591 -

isn't coffee an acid? I would suggest prune juice, however nomatter what you use, their is a chance the laxitive will still be in effect tomorrow

you could do an enema, but crimmny i wouldn't use one just so i don't have to open the bear trap at school


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We were sent to hell for eternity :hellfire: Ø:omgawesome:h®
We play on earth to pass the time :foreheadslap:

Over-population the root of all Evil-brings the Elites Closer to the gates.

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Re: Colon Purge [Re: Innominate]
    #8013606 -

colon purge?

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That outta do it.


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We are not human beings going through a temporary spiritual experience.

We are spiritual beings going through a temporary human experience.


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Re: Colon Purge [Re: makaveli8x8]
    #8015801 -

Quote:
isn't coffee an acid?


dunno, but it makes me shit in the morning :shrug:

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Re: Colon Purge [Re: Innominate]
    #8015825 -

Innominate said:
A Laxative?!?!? Noooooo, never heard of such a thing :rolleyes:

No shit sherlock, yes I've heard of a laxative. What I'm asking is what are some good, preferably all natural ones, and how long to they take to work.


A large glass of salt water. Give it an hour and be ready for it when it comes.


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Re: Colon Purge [Re: Innominate]
    #8015893 -

anal sex prep? i used to know a chick who liked anal and one day i found all these laxatives and lubricants in the same drawer. i hope you're telling the truth man.

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Re: Colon Purge [Re: hazey]
    #8016530 -

stick the end of the vacuum hose in your ass and turn it on make sure to keep it moist with some kinda lubricant(if you want natural lube then spit in it)

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Re: Colon Purge [Re: hazey]
    #8016590 -

hazey said:
anal sex prep? i used to know a chick who liked anal and one day i found all these laxatives and lubricants in the same drawer. i hope you're telling the truth man.


Thats what I thought of when I saw the topic "Colon Purge". I'm raising the BS flag on this one.


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My name is Mud

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Re: Colon Purge [Re: Innominate]
    #8016602 -

tryin to lose those last few pounds eh?

anyway, i agree with whats already been said. Drink a lot of coffee and then eat a big meal.  Or just find a bathroom at school in a very quiet part of the building...one where no one goes. And then lay it to waste.  :headbanger:


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Re: Colon Purge [Re: Colbadol]
    #8016618 -

i had similar problems in highschool. always having to take giant dumps but never being able to do so in the bathrooms (socially unacceptable).

Just go into a faculty restroom (usually single toilets) and drop the bomb there. If nobody catches you - you're good to go. If someone does, just explain that you were on your way to the public bathroom and caught the SUDDEN URGE that needed to be fixed immediately. One whif of the restroom you just bombed and they'll let you go.

Yes, i've done it and yes it works every time (as long as you lie correctly)

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Re: Colon Purge [Re: memes]
    #8016643 -

contrary to popular belief, all humans poop. Yes, even girls. *shudder*
most people are understanding enough. Ive walked in, seen someone in the stall and just walked out tons of times.


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Re: Colon Purge [Re: Colbadol]
    #8016672 -

girls don't poop you big liar. why do you lie.

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Re: Colon Purge [Re: Irradiated_Feces]
    #8016673 -

btw i loves the nekid bikes

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Re: Colon Purge [Re: memes]
    #8016687 -

meams said:
i had similar problems in highschool. always having to take giant dumps but never being able to do so in the bathrooms (socially unacceptable).



Thats so funny how its socially unacceptable to shit in high school. And no Colbadol, not everyone poops. Girls are biologically incapable of it, there were even articles in Scientific American and Discover recently on the topic.


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My name is Mud

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Re: Colon Purge [Re: DragonChaser]
    #8016740 -

enema and a cigarette


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omg really?

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Re: Colon Purge [Re: impgl]
    #8016887 -

u can get a natural laxative tea at a health food store


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Re: Colon Purge [Re: Her0]
    #8017257 -

"Smooth Move Herbal Laxative Tea". Tastes great, about 8 hours later you'll lose any and all material from your stomach to your sphincter.


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My name is Mud

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