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Re: Do you consider yourself anti-gay? [Re: mr_kite]
    #6606471 -

Also, to toss out something about 'being raised' gay, or as a result of your environment or whatever.

In many ways, I was 'raised' to be straight. I was encouraged to play sports, to fix things, to do 'boy' things. I was always told that one day I'd have a girlfriend, a wife. etc. My parents even went out of their way to ensure I had 'strong male' influences in my life. My grandfather was a cop, I had uncles who were farmers, pretty much every male in my family played hockey / etc.

Growing up, I'd have 'girlfriends', I'd do the whole kiss a girl thing - but I'd never seem to get anything out of it. Hell, even into high school - I kept getting messages that 'I should be noticing girls one day'. I'd go on dates with them, hell - even had a GF for a few weeks and made out a few times. However, during this time - something just didn't feel right, it felt like something was missing. I didnt get that 'pit of my gut UNF' over girls.

I could see a girl - and say that she was pretty / sexy / etc and mean it. I still find the female form to be VERY attractive, just not sexually arousing. But, I digress.

Then, one day - I was sitting in my grade 11 or 12 English class, and finding myself staring at the same person day after day. I started to get that 'fluttery' feeling in my stomach - that extra uNF that had been missing. Then, it dawned one me - I'm crushing, and I'm crushing on a guy - OMG. I WAS GAY!, so much of the past few years of my life suddenly made soooooooooooooooo much more sense.

Now, when I look back on my childhood - I recall things from a fairly young age which now make sense.

When other kids were playing doctors with the neibours daughter, I was lingering over the mens underwear section of the sears catalog. When the other kids were laughing / joking in the locker room, I felt uncomfortable but 'wasnt sure why'. I'd make a point to keep my eyes to myself and get in/out as fast as possible.

When I was in my pre/early teens - I remember my eyes starting to linger on my friends 'package'. It never occurred to me at the time that I was gay - I figured 'it was just curoisty and normal', but - I never seemed to have the same curoisty towards girls. I just kept telling myself 'it'd come in time'.

I guess whats the point of all this? - I was 'raised' on the path of being straight. Every possible point along the way was gearing me towards a life as a heterosexual. Hell, it was such a good job that I was 100% oblivious about it until I was about 17/18 when I clued in that I wasn't straight.

I dunno, I just don't think that being gay is a matter of your enviorment or how you were raised, it's something thats deeper than that.

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Re: Do you consider yourself anti-gay? [Re: kaniz]
    #6607236 -

Nice posts, Kaniz.

My question to those who believe homosexuality is a choice is: If the world suddenly flipped around and heterosexuality was "wrong", "unnatural", and would cause you to be hated or discriminated against the way gays are now, could you just "decide" to become gay?

I don't think sexual attraction is that simple. I don't remember making any conscious decision to like the opposite sex.

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Re: Do you consider yourself anti-gay? [Re: Asante]
    #6607258 -

i think some guys are hot. but there are a rare few i'd probably bang.

cute brunette girls with curves = key


--------------------
So I say, walk by the Spirit, and you will not gratify the desires of the flesh. - Galatians 5:16

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