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Re: Wanting to fuck [Re: a2ndopinion]
    #6481938 -

Look at this emoticon :thumbup:

it carries a collective weight in the universal mind, no doubt. By being raised as part of this planet's thoughtforms you will view the thumbs-up a certain way. Sure, sure. But other than that, any additional coloration is your resopnsibility.

There are people that are celibate and who have overcome sexual desire. There are people that view women only as objects to be bent over, dominated, fucked, used, hurt, raped, savaged, ravished, and pushed aside.

Where do you stand? Where do you want to stand? Start walking the path to where you want to be man.

I used to get stoned a lot and look at porn. I thought it was so hot. Then something in my  brain set off and I suddenly realized. Women are just pieces of flesh and bone and they HAVE NO CHARGE WHATSOEVER. They are neither hot or ugly. It is all an object of perception.

I found myself unable to really lust anymore. To scour facebook and look at "hot chicks" and feel horny for them. They are just pieces of meat man. The human organism..... it's just here.

Sex is a hardwired drive,  IMO moreso by social programming than biological, because any physical arousal you feel will fade away very quickly if your mind is not full of thinking lustful things, rather it was just an honest physical response.

But look.

Stop looking at those fucking pictures! They are worthless. They make you SUFFER. Do you realize this? Lust makes you suffer. It never does anything beneficial for the human being, EVER. It is nothing but suffering. From 8th grade when you wanted to go run home and masturbate so bad and it was getting you all antsy in the pants........ to being rejected by a girl who is not mature enough to understand unconditional love and is using you as an object. To using girls as objects.

To all the porn you watch that makes you want to get laid but then you aren't getting laid you are just laying yourself in your room and you feel lonely. To all the frustrated sexual dreams. To all the chicks you see everywhere conditioned to flaunt their bodies like old time prostitutes complete with writing on their ASSES saying things.......

It is nothing but suffering.

You are meant to have sex out of love. If you truely truely love a drug and treat it with humble respect it can be your friend. The Native Americans understood this and they did not ever have problems with addiction until they met white men. If you use a drug for lustful pleasure you have an addiction and you are in hell.

Lust is the same fucking way.

No more porn at all. Look at girls in the eyes, in the face, not in the bosoms. Stop using masochistic and chauvenistically flavored words like tits, ass, clit, pussy, twat, cunt, bitch, slut.

They are women. They have breasts. Breasts are just strange collections of fat.

Uncolor sexuality. So that if you have sex it is wonderful, but it is wonderful with your loved ones.

Telepylus is completely right about respecting womanhood.

I am saying this because I have suffered more from women and sexuality than anything in my entire life. It has droven me to want nothing more than to kill myself. It still grips me with immense pain.

And I don't want to just simply fuck. I want to be loved enough by someone to say "you are valid and I care about you" that we could simply nurture each other with phsyical touch. And I haven't found that.

and this desire, this colored emoticon has been strong enough to push me into bouts of suicidality when I was younger. The extremely wrong, viciously absurd social program that states that women are objects. That a man cannot be complete without putting his penis into a vagina. Or.... that a man cannot be complete without love from a woman.

It is an act of unity. I pray all people understand it and treat it right and experience it but.

Let go of it. It'x like holding onto a hot coal and hoping that before it destroys your hands it will cool off and turn into a diamond.

coloring : http://www.swamij.com/klishta-aklishta.htm


--------------------
I am the MacDaddy of Heimlich County, I play it Straight Up Yo!

....I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm, to feel connected enough to step aside and weep like a widow, to feel inspired, to fathom the power, to witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain, to swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human......
Om Namah Shivaya, I tell you What!

Edited by leery11 (01/21/07 09:24 AM)

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Re: Wanting to fuck [Re: leery11]
    #6481993 -

i completely agree .... and as far as the desire goes... it wont just fall away, you have to observe the desire and wait for it to subside... i do agree that we have an inherent desire to be with multiple partners even though we truly love one of them.

i think its very hard for people especially girls to understand that you could love them and still desire others... however, this desire and instinct comes from the purely animal driven human. i believe that we are now in the next faze of evolution where we are moving away from this.

the fact is that having one parter that you are very close to and work with is a lot more beneficial then having multiple partners. at least spiritually. you learn to go deep into this person and merge your souls. to experience true unconditional love of all of creation not just oh yea baby you feel so good.

so what I'm saying is that the urge comes from the past( need to spread seed, continue the population etc.) the action of observing the desire until it fades is the action of the future (spiritually awakened mindfulness that we must realize or we all die.) so don't feel bad i actually struggle with this my self.... but i know what is best for me to progress, and i walk that path. guilt will not help your progression.... only observation.

i must also add that if you could truly truly be in a situation of complete understanding and non jealousy this bond of true love could be had with multiple partners. and could be even more benefitial because it is connecting with more people... but i think this is extremely rare and almost always causes problems that regress you spirituality. but it is possible


--------------------
love is what is left when you"ve let go of everything you love

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Re: Wanting to fuck [Re: a2ndopinion]
    #6482239 -

a2ndopinion said:
i'm a girl... so i thought maybe you'd be interested in my opinion.

i have had many boyfriends who felt the same way you do, i guess. i mean, they'd say they loved me but they also had strong desires to fuck other women. one boyfriend flat out told me not to worry over it, that he could control it, and it was just "a guy thing". he also cheated on me though, i found out much later, so... i mean... that's fucked up. especially since he told me i had nothing to worry about...

i mean, i know that guys have some primal urge to look at and fantasize about other women. women have it too... but, personally, i would never act on it if i am in a relationship. so, my point is, i guess that as long as you keep it to yourself (i'm pretty sure your GF doesn't want to hear about the other girls you'd wanna bang) and never ever act on it, then it's no big deal. it's nothing you really need to feel bad about if it's just thoughts. but, if you do decide that you must act on these thoughts, then at least break up with your girl before sleeping with somebody else.

finding out i had been cheated on was an incredibly awful experience. i wouldn't wish that kind of pain on anyone.



that's the big problem. people are selfish. the concept of monogamy is a good one, but that doesn't by any means make it right or even wrong. as was said before, men naturally want to fuck as many women as possible. it's silly to pretty much totally disregard things like polyamory and such. people need to learn to share. sex is generally totally independent of love, or at least as far as this thread is concerned...so whats the big deal?


--------------------
TACOS LIKE A MOTHERFUCKER

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Re: Wanting to fuck [Re: leery11]
    #6482603 -

Were you talking to me leery11? I dont look at porn or pictures myself, I grabbed that one off google. Thats some great writing though. But...you say "You are meant to have sex out of love". Is this true? Back in the day, would the Alpha male not have sex with as many of the females as he could? Obviously modern humans have evolved far from such primeval instincts, but isn't that instinct still there? I completely agree with you, and personally I strive to rise above it, but should that be a given?


--------------------
let yourself be silently drawn by the stronger pull of what you really love

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Re: Wanting to fuck [Re: mr_kite]
    #6482754 -

mr_kite said:
would the Alpha male not have sex with as many of the females as he could? Obviously modern humans have evolved far from such primeval instincts



thats debatable...


--------------------
"The real voyage of discovery
consists not in seeing new landscapes,
but in having new eyes."

"Small doses suck dogs cocks, smoke that shit until the elves piss in your eyes. " -Hanky

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Re: Wanting to fuck [Re: mr_kite]
    #6482837 -

mr_kite said:
But...you say "You are meant to have sex out of love". Is this true?[1] ... Obviously modern humans have evolved far from such primeval instincts[2], but isn't that instinct still there?




(1) The problem with the statement isn't whether it's THE answer or not, the problem is there IS no answer, so when it says "You are meant", it presuposesthere is some "right way" to view and act on interpersonal and romantic aspects of sexuality. There is no right way to go about, it's a matter of preference. Some people may act simply on animalistic urges and that might be enough for them. For others sexuality is an exclusively emotional ordeal bewteen two people in love. A lot of people lie somewhere in between There's not way that people in general are "meant" to live.

(2) No, they haven't. A handful have adopted different standards based more in rationality and more sophisticated emotions, but "modern humans" in general haven't changed any since they wore animal pelts and and shat in the bushes.



Oh, and that picture of the blonde? It actually repulses me. I don't know why, but I actually am sickened by bronze-skinned, bleach-blonde, meaty whorish-looking women. Just not visually appealing at all. Anything that looks artificial just isn't appealing to me. Though to be fair, I think my relationships have pretty much brought me to the point where I have to be emotionally connected to somebody before I can even experience physical attraction. My list of priorities go: intelligent, funny, indepent, kind, pretty. And pretty for me means naturally pretty. If a girl isn't pretty with her natural hair color, very little make up, and every day clothes, then she isn't pretty at all as far as I'm concerned.

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Re: Wanting to fuck [Re: HeadTripVertigo]
    #6482968 -

HeadTripVertigo said:
people need to learn to share. sex is generally totally independent of love, or at least as far as this thread is concerned...so whats the big deal?



well, it's a big deal to me if i am in a relationship. i expect it to be monogamous. i want it to be monogamous... for a myriad of reasons.


--------------------
Boo, you whore.

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Re: Wanting to fuck [Re: donkers5257]
    #6482975 -

donkers5257 said:
And pretty for me means naturally pretty. If a girl isn't pretty with her natural hair color, very little make up, and every day clothes, then she isn't pretty at all as far as I'm concerned.



yay!


--------------------
Boo, you whore.

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Re: Wanting to fuck [Re: mr_kite]
    #6483033 -

mr_kite said:
Were you talking to me leery11? I dont look at porn or pictures myself, I grabbed that one off google. Thats some great writing though. But...you say "You are meant to have sex out of love". Is this true? Back in the day, would the Alpha male not have sex with as many of the females as he could? Obviously modern humans have evolved far from such primeval instincts, but isn't that instinct still there? I completely agree with you, and personally I strive to rise above it, but should that be a given?



i think it was to you, but i didn't know you just grabbed the picture.

so

is animal behavior, pack characteristics, dog like activity, etc, still really relevant to humanity? "Meant to be" well. One half animal and one half God is what it seems like humans are and so meant to be is such a broad question. Our science and history gives us the animal half, but society is blinded to think that we are "meant to be" anything more than animals generally speaking, excluding all the religions of men.

we have a very rich history of consciousness exploration and abandoning animal drives too.


--------------------
I am the MacDaddy of Heimlich County, I play it Straight Up Yo!

....I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm, to feel connected enough to step aside and weep like a widow, to feel inspired, to fathom the power, to witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain, to swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human......
Om Namah Shivaya, I tell you What!

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Re: Wanting to fuck [Re: a2ndopinion]
    #6483038 -

sex with love is a wonderful thing to experience and sex without love is mediocore at best. but you still wish to have sex with others? why? Doesnt matter but having natural feelings looked down upon is idiotic because it then causes people to lie and feel bad about themselves for having inapropriate feelings and shit and is generally healthy active and uplifting. so why not spread the feeling of sex with everyone and spread the love:heart:


--------------------
i'm a very evolved ape you know.

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Re: Wanting to fuck [Re: leery11]
    #6483039 -

Maybe it is meant to be both.


--------------------
:redpanda:
If I should die this very moment
I wouldn't fear
For I've never known completeness
Like being here
Wrapped in the warmth of you
Loving every breath of you

:heartpump: :bunnyhug: :yinyang:

:yinyang: :levitate: :earth: :levitate: :yinyang:

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Re: Wanting to fuck [Re: rubixcubies]
    #6483288 -

rubixcubies said:
sex with love is a wonderful thing to experience and sex without love is mediocore at best. but you still wish to have sex with others? why? Doesnt matter but having natural feelings looked down upon is idiotic because it then causes people to lie and feel bad about themselves for having inapropriate feelings and shit and is generally healthy active and uplifting. so why not spread the feeling of sex with everyone and spread the love:heart:



dude... don't get me wrong.  i am all about spreading the love.  when i am not in a serious relationship, i'm down for some love-spreading (however, not disease spreading... always use a condom, kids!!!).  but, if i feel passionately enough about someone to the point where we mutually decide to be in a longterm relationship, then i expect it to be committed and exclusive.  that's just how i roll.  when i'm in love with someone i want them all to myself, and i want them to want me all to themselves.  is there really anything wrong with that? 

i mean, being in a relationship, for me, doesn't mean the sex stops or anything.  i fuck my boyfriend all the time... and we try all kinds of new freaky shit just to keep things interesting.  for me, this is the best way for a relationship to work.  IMO, bringing another person in for a threesome, or having an "open relationship" is just asking for drama.

i was a theatre major.  i prefer my drama on stage, not in my real life.


--------------------
Boo, you whore.

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Re: Wanting to fuck [Re: a2ndopinion]
    #6483949 -

there comes a time when you lose that desire.. or some men do like me which is probably rare. alot of it is how we are programmed, our bodies and especially the media.
yes, as males we have the urge to mate, but females have the exact same thing programmed into their genetics or whatever you would like to call it. the purpose is to produce life. but the media takes it and gives us 1000000X more desire than we would ever of had in the wild. [control desire repression control]. you dont see animals fucking the whole year round all the time everyday, as most humans would like to. well this is because there lives are balanced. reproducing is not on their minds constanly, and they have alot else to worry about other than fucking.
probably the reason you feel like fucking other girls is because you havent spent time with those other girls and also you are unable to express and fufill your emotional connection with them. life is confusing, but i can tell you the desperateness we have come to is not natural or beneficial to us or our species our or planet which is overpopulated with peoples kid's when the parents are even in love, or knowledgeable enough to reproduce. the desperation we have come to is not natural either. if we were cavemen, we wouldnt have the desire to fuck all the time. part of it is because women dress so provacatively and wonder that is why men can only think that (atleast in cerain periods of their life). it is hard for them to understand it from out perspective i guess causse they arent programmed with the same hormones, they are more recieveing to create life, not initiating.
well anyways like i was saying its not natural to be so horny and desperate. After becoming so much less desperate i realized it is a learned thing, as are so many other things which we think are inherintly natural. Reading this book about tribes of the amazon (current era) only reiforced my idea. They actully get married there. They are less desperate because they are not so detached from their natural lives and hormones. and they have much more to worry about like surviving.

If you think about it lustful sex wasnt realistically an option for people until the relatively recent invention of condoms and contracectpive devices. If you had sex, youre fucked in 9 months.. this is why women wore so many layers of rediculous clothing back in the day.
i know the desperation has instinctual roots, but it is for certain not natural to desprate as 99% of us are.

maybe we are becoming so desperate to expand our race, because the end is coming soon in 2012(i doubt it) and we messed up not devoting our energy into space travel and colonization.
but yea, alot of people experience desperation, but not everyone.

since our genitals and our feet our usually covered up they have become super-sensitive. walking on the ground can be just as pleasurable (if you are in the right state of mind). I have felt estatic just by hiking barefoot, and i could tell it was making the earth feel good aswell.
good luck, its something hard to explain, but know, not everyone is in desperation.


--------------------
God says dance with your heart
And shake free of you desire

Where theres a will theres always a way
When you get confused listen to the music play


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Re: Wanting to fuck [Re: leery11]
    #6484035 -

leery11 said:
I used to get stoned a lot and look at porn. I thought it was so hot. Then something in my brain set off and I suddenly realized. Women are just pieces of flesh and bone and they HAVE NO CHARGE WHATSOEVER. They are neither hot or ugly. It is all an object of perception.

I found myself unable to really lust anymore. To scour facebook and look at "hot chicks" and feel horny for them. They are just pieces of meat man. The human organism..... it's just here.

Sex is a hardwired drive, IMO moreso by social programming than biological, because any physical arousal you feel will fade away very quickly if your mind is not full of thinking lustful things, rather it was just an honest physical response.




So maybe it is less rare than i would believe. Lust is so empty once you realize you would like someone by your side to understand and talk to and help you. and make something special not empty.

Quote:
But look.

Stop looking at those fucking pictures! They are worthless. They make you SUFFER. Do you realize this? Lust makes you suffer. It never does anything beneficial for the human being, EVER. It is nothing but suffering. From 8th grade when you wanted to go run home and masturbate so bad and it was getting you all antsy in the pants........ to being rejected by a girl who is not mature enough to understand unconditional love and is using you as an object. To using girls as objects.

To all the porn you watch that makes you want to get laid but then you aren't getting laid you are just laying yourself in your room and you feel lonely. To all the frustrated sexual dreams. To all the chicks you see everywhere conditioned to flaunt their bodies like old time prostitutes complete with writing on their ASSES saying things.......

It is nothing but suffering.

You are meant to have sex out of love. If you truely truely love a drug and treat it with humble respect it can be your friend. The Native Americans understood this and they did not ever have problems with addiction until they met white men. If you use a drug for lustful pleasure you have an addiction and you are in hell.

Lust is the same fucking way.




Hes not going to understand this just by us telling him. You couldnt have understood it by someone telling you, it had to come from your empty experiences, and the chemicals of understanding clicking in your brain.

Mr_kite- you talk about alpha male stuff as if you have experienced. its not true. you have not experienced it. this mentality is just programmed into you by the dominator society values, beer commercials, lust, desire, control, repression, media, etc...

I tell you once again, denying those real connections that you have to people (and probably an euqally confused [controlling and jealous girlfriend])are going to hold you back from this freedom of your mind until it all builds up... It is going to keep you suffering and clinging to lust and desire. Listen to us. Fufill your heart, and make a connection to anyone you feel it with. dont be jealous or feel wierd if your girlfriend does the same. if she is jealous now, shes probably not going to change..
All this talk about programming... we are programmed into being so lustful and repressed and desperate (atleast in this society), but an even greater drive/force is the instinct to take care of the woman you love.

Tell us about your girlfriend mr_kite. is she jealous or controlling?




A2ndopionon- You are wrong about "as long as you dont tell your partner about these feelings". the more you hide something the more it eats away at you. 'the thoughts we try to deny take a toll upon our lives'. if you embrace your thoughts, you dont cling to them. stopping them from flowing by internalizing and denying them will only confused you more and make you feel guilty. being honest is sometimes hard, but it is the only way things will really work out.


--------------------
God says dance with your heart
And shake free of you desire

Where theres a will theres always a way
When you get confused listen to the music play


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Re: Wanting to fuck [Re: mr_kite]
    #6484061 -

mr_kite said:
One thing that I find undeniable in life is the male human urge to fuck. I frequently feel bad in my long term relationship due to my entirely natural male instinct to be attracted to females and to desire them physically, even when I am in love with my girlfriend. (Not even only physical desire, I feel other emotianal links too on occasion) Granted it doesnt happen often, but its not that I haven't met my perfect girl, or am too young; blha blha blah etc etc giber on. I think human nature is too complex to simplify to modern ideals.

Guidence, wisdom, please?



any emotion or action in our body is controlled by chemical reactions

the chemical that controls "wanting to fuck" is known as a steroid hormone (as estrogen or testosterone) that is produced especially by the ovaries, testes, or adrenal cortex and affects the growth or function of the reproductive organs or the development of secondary sex characteristics

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Re: Wanting to fuck [Re: CerebralFlower]
    #6485660 -

CerebralFlower said:
Mr_kite- you talk about alpha male stuff as if you have experienced. its not true. you have not experienced it. this mentality is just programmed into you by the dominator society values, beer commercials, lust, desire, control, repression, media, etc...

I tell you once again, denying those real connections that you have to people (and probably an euqally confused [controlling and jealous girlfriend])are going to hold you back from this freedom of your mind until it all builds up... It is going to keep you suffering and clinging to lust and desire. Listen to us. Fufill your heart, and make a connection to anyone you feel it with. dont be jealous or feel wierd if your girlfriend does the same. if she is jealous now, shes probably not going to change..
All this talk about programming... we are programmed into being so lustful and repressed and desperate (atleast in this society), but an even greater drive/force is the instinct to take care of the woman you love.

Tell us about your girlfriend mr_kite. is she jealous or controlling?





Emmmmmmm....im not sure I understand or agree with you at all. I am also not sure that I am as confused as you make out. Perhaps you yourself are confused :wink:;)

First off, of course humans have to rise above their natural instincts, as we have evolved to be capable of this; it is what makes us human, what makes us different from the animals. (EG similarly an animal cannot consciously decide to change their diet for moral reasons (vegetarianism), but humans can). But; these "animal" instincts are still there. You cannot deny them, they are not programmed into us by society, they are part of our make up; part of being human. Men aren't attracted to breasts because society makes us, its an instictive attraction (stemming from the comfort of a mothers bosom from babyhood to the way that they remind us of women's buttocks from when we used to fuck doggystyle in the caves :wink:). Of course society plays on, capitalises on and encourages these instincts, but society doesnt create them.

So, we cannot deny the instincts that make us human, yet we cannot deny the fact that we have to rise above those instincts, as that is also what makes us human. A contradictory predicament; but from my experience the human race is a very condradictory thing.

My girlfriend is one of the least jealous or controlling people you'll ever meet! And I am even less jealous and controling. Very occasionaly  some will arise but we are reasonable, like-minded people. Our honesty and commitment to eachother means that we have complete trust, and we know that we would never cheat on eachother. I feel very lucky to be with such a great girl.


--------------------
let yourself be silently drawn by the stronger pull of what you really love

Edited by mr_kite (01/22/07 12:07 PM)

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Re: Wanting to fuck [Re: mr_kite]
    #6487109 -

instinctual, yes and no

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Re: Wanting to fuck [Re: capliberty]
    #6489254 -

i thought of this just now.. what if we jsut wnat to fuck because our soceity enables us to meet our physical needs with very little work so we constantly want to breed because it is favourable conditions in which to raise offspring but what about when you are depressed and have no desire to fuck? is this a chemical response telling you not to breed because the situation is miserable and undesirable to bring another life into.


--------------------
i'm a very evolved ape you know.

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Re: Wanting to fuck [Re: MushmanTheManic]
    #6489955 -

MushmanTheManic said:
You're pleased that their pleased by your [sexual] pleasing.



This is exactly what they talked about on that episode of Seinfeld where George and Jerry are both neurotic about giving bad head to women. It's emasculating and displeasing.


--------------------
my.web dev

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Re: Wanting to fuck [Re: mr_kite]
    #6490022 -

it's just sex.

like everything else in life it is what you make of it.

spiritual paths may enforce the renunciation of pull to desire but think to yourself "to what avail"

the point of spirituality is to live a joyful life (for yourself and others). IMHO.

if you can do this while having sex/ using drugs go for it, just be non-attached to these things and realize they are temporary, and TRUE happiness comes from within, not from ANYTHING OR ANYONE ELSE.

to the original poster. dont feel guilt for being sexually attracted to women while you have a girlfriend.

our society has demonized sex, when it is a NATURAL HUMAN RESPONSE.

i personally am in a relationship so i respect the GAME rules of not acting on these impulses (knowing the suffering it would bring), however this again is just part of the complicated thing we have made of sex/relationships.

i'm not saying i know the answer because i sure as hell dont but this is my idea. i have been in the same mental place (of debating what to do about my sexual desires) that many of you are describing  and this is the conclusion i have come to, not just in regards to sex but to spirituality and life itself.

take from my words what you will, but please remember not to take anything too damn seriously. :smile:

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