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Re: Why does my dad suck? [Re: Delyrium]
    #2722177 -

Not to offend you but you I think you are becoming dependent upon your abuser in a really unhealthy way that warrants psychological help.  You really ought to go see a counselor because the things you've talked about are in no way normal and are probably affecting the rest of your life as well.  Hope things get better, and don't talk to him ever again.  That's my advice.  But I'm sure you already know that.  :thumbup:


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Persons denying the existence of robots may be robots themselves.

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Re: Why does my dad suck? [Re: Delyrium]
    #2722286 -

sorry to hear this... i have many friends who have horrible relationships with one or both of their parents, and it always makes me really grateful for the great parents i've got...

i would suggest talking things out, saying to him how you feel about it all, and so on... maybe things won't get better, but it's always better than just brooding over it!

:smile:


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Re: Why does my dad suck? [Re: Delyrium]
    #2722645 -

I wouldn't say you were "dependant on your abuser" or anything like that. You're just upset that your dad isn't who he's supposed to be and rightfully so. We have certain expectations of our parents. One is that they nurture us to be the best people we can be and also show us that we are a priority in their lives. Just know that there are many, many people out there with f*cked up parents. It just forces you to be stronger and more independent. You could try to talk to him again, but how many years can you wait for things to change just to be hurt again and again? It's not fair to you and it doesn't seem to bother him in the least. So if your own father can't listen to you for 5 minutes to understand his own daughter, then I hate to say it, but fuck him. Tell him when he's ready you'll be available, but don't have anything to do with him and try to move on. Some people just never get it. Slip him a ten strip and lock him in a room for 12 hours.....he'll get it when he gets out!


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Re: Why does my dad suck? [Re: mockeylock]
    #2725638 -

i find when i an situation with ppl who hurt you, talking about somtimes works (depending on the person)but only if that person is willing to talk, and accept resonsibility for their actions, some people cant seem to understand that they hurt others, through their action/words and it takes a lot for them to finaly come to this realization (if ever, some ppl are just stuborn)and your dad sounds like the kinds of person who has trouble admiting to fault, so i agree with other posters on here, if he isnt willing to talk to you, admit wrong doing, he isnt wroth your time,money, or efort, father or no father

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Re: Why does my dad suck? [Re: Delyrium]
    #24912129 -

I've come to realize that when parents become shitty parents there's a good chance that they have a mental block...usually caused by some kind of childhood trauma and then possibly another trauma in their later life... to the parent they may never even realize they had trauma because back in their day, it was normal. If anyone goes through anything in younger years it encrypts their brains significantly and a lot of different things can happen to the brain after that in negative ways which makes them act in negative ways. I always say, everybody does everything the way they do for a reason (reason being from life experiences and how the mind processed that)...perhaps your dad getting that dog was his way (not always the proper way, but to him it may seem proper)of getting you a dog because he knew that you would be around it often but this way he has some kind of control over it, do you get what I'm trying to say? Until we take the time to study and research the human psyche and its past and present we cant really understand why ppl choose to do the things that they do. I had to go though this process with my both of my parents to figure out who they really are and although, because of the wiring of each of our brains, we still don't get along but at least I understand why now. Hope this helps


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I'm a leaf on a windy day ~

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