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What are you choosing to let kill you?
    #23034016 -

What if you woke up tomorrow & find out you have terminal lung cancer? Or tonight after work you go to that club you always went because that's what you do & on the way you get hit by a car & die? Or would it be a heart attack? Or you drown?

You could say that death doesn't just happen, but it is a constant work-in-progress that you do by each breath you take, each decision you make, each bite, each late night & missed traffic light - they each bring us one step closer to our own denouement from this world. Life itself is a long string of choices & habits which lead to death.

You got lung cancer because YOU chose to smoke cigarettes. You got hit by a car because YOU chose to go to that club. Heart attack? YOU chose to eat unhealthy & not exercise. You got drowned because YOU thought a day at the seaside would do you good. It's always YOU. Because hadn't you done those things you'd not have died.

Everything you do each day brings you closer to death in its own unique & subtle way. It's not about when you are going to die, but rather what you are choosing as your vehicle to get there? What are you choosing to let kill you?

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Re: What are you choosing to let kill you? [Re: jodidonino]
    #23034033 -

So the question is, 'how are we choosing to live our lives'?


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"To be yourself in a world that is constantly trying to make you something else is the greatest accomplishment" - Ralph Waldo Emerson

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Re: What are you choosing to let kill you? [Re: HardTrippin]
    #23034080 -

Yes, indirectly. I was trying to see life and death as one instead of opposites, and this post came about. Hopefully that's what it conveys :smile:

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Re: What are you choosing to let kill you? [Re: jodidonino]
    #23034107 -

What if you die of old age? Are you choosing to let old age kill you?


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Shroomery mycologist definitely know their shit. :wink:


Knowledge talks. Wisdom listens.

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Re: What are you choosing to let kill you? [Re: klhouse]
    #23034169 -

I guess you chose to avoid the things that kill you & died a natural death later in life, which is still a choice. Because if you died of old age, chances are that you chose to avoid cigarettes, unhealthy food & chose to exercise & eat right. But still that doesn't guarantee longevity, as death is unpredictable. Which got me thinking that the best thing to do, as Charles Bukowski said it : "Find what you love and let it kill you".

Love travelling? Go for it. If you died on that path, you died in love :heart:

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Re: What are you choosing to let kill you? [Re: jodidonino]
    #23034498 -

The Langoliers.

:death:


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γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself

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Re: What are you choosing to let kill you? [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #23034602 -

I feel like I'm looking forward to death myself. Passing to the other side, just on the off-chance that there's anything else there, feels like the next big adventure to me. Possibly the greatest adventure.

And as such I tend to indulge in some pretty high-risk activities in this life. Seeing death the way you describe it in OP seems very unexciting IMO. It's coming for us all, so why live a life considering which activities one might choose so as to stave it off for as long as possible? I've lived long enough to notice my physical form deteriorate with age; do I really wanna try and drag this vehicle I'm in along until it starts to loose all of its faculties? For what reason would that be again?

Sure my biological instincts still kick in when I get close to it, but thinking about not doing all the things that excite me in life cause they might give me a few more years in this crazy world seems the antithesis of living a free, fulfilled life.

Live fast, die young I guess is my philosophy. I do the first bit, I just wish I could guarantee the second bit.


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Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not.
--Jac O'keeffe

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Re: What are you choosing to let kill you? [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #23034753 -

MarkostheGnostic said:
The Langoliers.

:death:


I love this answer.

For me, probably oxygen. No matter how I try I just can't stop breathing, and despite the fact that not breathing would quickly kill me, all this breathing is still going to eventually kill me.


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Edited by Vahn421 (03/22/16 05:41 PM)

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Re: What are you choosing to let kill you? [Re: Vahn421]
    #23035002 -

Vahn421 said:
MarkostheGnostic said:
The Langoliers.

:death:


I love this answer.

For me, probably oxygen. No matter how I try I just can't stop breathing, and despite the fact that not breathing would quickly kill me, all this breathing is still going to eventually kill me.


Well, thanks. :cheers: Maybe start taking some potent anti-oxidants: Astaxanthin, Bilberry (Blueberry) extract, Alpha Lipoic Acid, Vitamins C & E. :lol:


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γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself

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Re: What are you choosing to let kill you? [Re: Vahn421]
    #23035043 -

I had a friend who used to say that he wanted to die in a car going fast.

He died in a car going fast.  He wasn't even driving.


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Anxiety is what you make it.

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Re: What are you choosing to let kill you? [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
    #23035067 -

You, my virtual friend, are probably depressed. But from what I've learned of your losses of late, it is actually normal to feel that way. I think you must have racked up some of the highest possible stressors listed on the Holmes and Rahe Stress Scale: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holmes_and_Rahe_stress_scale ; Fortunately, (from what I understand of the changes you've been going through), your depression is situational, not endogenous (Reactive Depression). Your situation will change, and probably for the better if you've hit rock bottom 'cause there's no where else to go except up - unless you die of course. Don't be so hasty to die. I'm old, but my quality of life is just fine and apparently (as I was told today by a 35 year old client) I do not look my age at all. I finally get to enjoy life like I did until college ended and I had to go out and work for a living, create a professional persona, struggle to obtain credentials and become a goddamned grown-up. I better not get sick and die before I can resume living by my own rules for as at least as long as I had to 'work by the sweat of my brow,' which means another 30+  :noway2:


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γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself

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Re: What are you choosing to let kill you? [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #23035946 -

You're right man, I'm pretty damn sure I am, and also pretty damn sure that it's situational. My whole life is up in the fucking air right now and it's wearing thin. I've been working with my therapist on trying to bring it to the surface but don't seem to be having much luck. Rather, it seems to be lurking down there somewhere and catching me unawares from time to time.

But saying that, I've been one for daredevil activities since my earliest memories. There's a certain thrill for me that comes from getting close to the edge.

The only difference between the last few years and all those that preceded them is the fact that I used to fear death - I don't seem to fear it anymore. I can think of much worse things than dying, and like I say, the fact that what lies beyond is mystery is intriguing and exciting to me.


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Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not.
--Jac O'keeffe

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Re: What are you choosing to let kill you? [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
    #23036033 -

Eternity is Present prior to creation, during all of creation, and by definition, will be Present at the death of creation - regardless of whether it expands and fizzles out, slows, stops, and reverses into a Cosmic Crunch, or some not-yet imagined possibility. Experiencing The Eternal Now is the subject of mysticism, and physical death by itself does not necessarily guarantee the proper experience of It/Him/Her. That is to say, we must become like the Light to Be the Light. The Christian metaphor is not Light, but Love. We must Love to enter into Eternal Life, because Love is the nature of Eternal Life, the Life of God, hence the urgency to Love in the New Testament for example. That being said, ceasing to care about one's physical life is an absence of Love for oneself. It's like watching a puppy drown when it's in your power to save it. How cruel to treat oneself that way! And why?! I don't even know you, but I would be grieved to hear of your demise. :shrug: You know yourself better than anyone else at these forums know you, and you no doubt still have work to do on this plane, but you're saying 'fuck it.' That's just walking out of the movie before it's over.


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γνῶθι σαὐτόν - Gnothi Seauton - Know Thyself

Edited by MarkostheGnostic (03/24/16 04:06 PM)

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Re: What are you choosing to let kill you? [Re: Jokeshopbeard]
    #23036329 -

Close To The Edge



Jokes, you care too much, and think that there's so much more to find, you're willing to pay a stranger to dig deep within you, but you need to pick up the shovel and do it yourself.  I'm kidding, there is no shovel.  It's a spoon.


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Anxiety is what you make it.

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Re: What are you choosing to let kill you? [Re: LunarEclipse]
    #23036359 -

LunarEclipse said:
Close To The Edge



Jokes, you care too much, and think that there's so much more to find, you're willing to pay a stranger to dig deep within you, but you need to pick up the shovel and do it yourself.  I'm kidding, there is no shovel.  It's a spoon.


We have a winner. Yes and this record absolutely rules.

The last part of your post is incredibly lucid, LE.


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"Real knowledge is to know the extent of one’s ignorance." — Confucius

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Re: What are you choosing to let kill you? [Re: Loaded Shaman]
    #23036369 -

It's odd I wrote that without really thinking about it.  Maybe it came from outer space.



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Anxiety is what you make it.

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Re: What are you choosing to let kill you? [Re: LunarEclipse]
    #23036373 -

LunarEclipse said:
It's odd I wrote that without really thinking about it.  Maybe it came from outer space.




Or from a center/space that's more true and in alignment than the ego typically allows.

Spot on, mate.


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"Real knowledge is to know the extent of one’s ignorance." — Confucius

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Re: What are you choosing to let kill you? [Re: Loaded Shaman]
    #23036382 -

"Making love with his ego, Ziggy sucked up into his mind
Like a leper messiah"


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Anxiety is what you make it.

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Re: What are you choosing to let kill you? [Re: Loaded Shaman]
    #23036412 -

Some people don't have the power of choice. They find themselves living in some of the most polluted areas of cities where the length of average life is far shorter than the rich shts who live in the leafy relatively fresher areas with 'less stress'

Others in 'the undevloped world' may find thmselves literally living on rubbish tips, and on sewage where the water is not fit to drink and even the air is not fit to breathe.......................................!

There are two extremes, the ascetic and the liberatianism, and like all extremes which are not separate but form a dynamism, there are infinite shades in between and...

In China there is the philosophy and practice of Tai chi from which Qigong comes which can also be very monk-oriented and ascetic. By moving certain ways and focusing on the breath and 'qi' also translated as 'chi'--'the universal energy', apparently you can direct this energy, a Taoist saying being 'where the mind goes chi follows', and you can resolve 'blocked energy' which they say is cause of disease, and there is the promise of living to be a 100 if you get good at it. You see many older Chinese people do these moves also

I the healer traditions of the upper Amazon there is this asceticism also. Healers (Ayahuesceros) who will use psychoactive plants such as Ayahuasca will themselves abide by a special diet ('dieta') which basically cuts out many of the tasty stuff, and celibacy! As a result many of the youth there are refusing to carry on this healing tradition because they don't want that kind of diet, discipline and want sex sex sex!

In the psychedelic movement now there seems to be an emphasis on an ascetic form of taking psychedelics which promotes healing the past, and 'heroic doses'. I was watching a video of this young guy saying how he had taken a massive does of shrooms, and refused to listen to music because it was a 'distraction' to healing!
So it seems fun whilst tripping is seen as 'recreational' and 'escape' and all that is a big no no to the therapeutic mindset.

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Re: What are you choosing to let kill you? [Re: LunarEclipse]
    #23039800 -

MarkostheGnostic said:
You know yourself better than anyone at these forums know you, and you no doubt still have work to do on this plane, but you're saying 'fuck it.' That's just walking out of the movie before it's over.


Thanks for saying Markos. I agree. I undoubtedly have more work to do on this plane. And 'fuck it' is exactly what I'm saying. Throwing my toys out the pram, as some might say. Or, put another way, not accepting my reality as it is. I've let my practice slip quite a bit of late, which I find can happen quite easily if one is not paying attention. Unnervingly easily in fact.


LunarEclipse said:
Jokes, you care too much, and think that there's so much more to find, you're willing to pay a stranger to dig deep within you, but you need to pick up the shovel and do it yourself.  I'm kidding, there is no shovel.  It's a spoon.


I agree very much with your spoon analogy. Slow progress. Although when I entered therapy I didn't do so with the expectation of paying someone to do the work for me. I was practicing religiously at the time, I just wanted to supplement my own work with another POV. It has been helpful in that regard. It's kinda turned my spoon from a teaspoon to a tablespoon.

How does one turn it into a shovel? Or better yet, a big fuck off diesel powered digger?


--------------------
Let it be seen that you are nothing. And in knowing that you are nothing... there is nothing to lose, there is nothing to gain. What can happen to you? Something can happen to the body, but it will either heal or it won't. What's the big deal? Let life knock you to bits. Let life take you apart. Let life destroy you. It will only destroy what you are not.
--Jac O'keeffe

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