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Re: yes another, im leaving [Re: fireworks_god]
    #1809180 -


i hope i do find something.
wich is about the only hope i have in my life.
i spent so much time demeaning hope,
questioning good nature and ignoring myself
that i ended up at this situation.
ive realized how much hope
and a general well being to live comes into play

i lived so many years
with no reason to live,
no hope for anything
and with no passion for life, cept in poetry

Quote:
To decide to give up this Experience offered here will be the worst decision you ever made, and the last one.




this is known to me, and thats why i cant kill myself
ive tried, and its impossible for me to do it directly
and thats also why im leaving here.
because i hope that something better is out there for me
and i hope that i will find it one day
and put to rest all my doubtfullness and manic depression



--------------------
*NEW!* from Monkah Inc.The "Silence game" hold an exhilerating game between you and a friend,see who finds silence first! (warning:M. Inc. patented silence-in-its-self,failure to pay up will result in sending satan after you! err,we mean our laywer!)

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Re: yes another, im leaving [Re: Monkah]
    #1809187 -

Good luck, man. Maybe you should stop by Los Angeles and we can go to a poetry reading? They have some nice places here.

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Re: yes another, im leaving [Re: Monkah]
    #1809190 -

You could well be in for the grandest adventure of your life Monkah, i realize right now it may SEEM like the end of the world, i'm sure things seem kind of terrifying to a cattepillar too just B4 it morphs into a butterfly :wink:


--------------------
"Being crazier than a shithouse rat is not sufficient grounds for banishment"


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Re: yes another, im leaving [Re: Rhizoid]
    #1809206 -

i realize that.
but still, it does not change the way i feel
i had even come to the point that i had not thought about having sex with anyone else, and not even thinking of cheating on her or leaving her for any reason.

before i met her, i didnt have a sexual apetite. i didnt care
i didnt want love, i had no urge to find it or even try it.

i feel though, that if i did ever fall in love again
it would be just a shadow of what i had
and could never compare

life is just full of proving me wrong though.

like mainy said, time will tell.


--------------------
*NEW!* from Monkah Inc.The "Silence game" hold an exhilerating game between you and a friend,see who finds silence first! (warning:M. Inc. patented silence-in-its-self,failure to pay up will result in sending satan after you! err,we mean our laywer!)

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Re: yes another, im leaving [Re: LeViTY]
    #1809314 -

i would love too!
ive never had a chance to read my poetry in front of a group
besides friends.

so, i just take 40 all the way to cali, find los angelos
and youll be waiting there to go to a poetry club?
sweet.


--------------------
*NEW!* from Monkah Inc.The "Silence game" hold an exhilerating game between you and a friend,see who finds silence first! (warning:M. Inc. patented silence-in-its-self,failure to pay up will result in sending satan after you! err,we mean our laywer!)

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Re: yes another, im leaving [Re: Monkah]
    #1809391 -

Existance itself is much like poetry, the ryhmes of of a verse, our thoughts can sometimes go in reverse. Life has its ups and downs, like the rythms of a song. It arouses feelings in us that can change us. Sometimes poetry can be short, much like life is, but sometimes it is long. The best part of poetry for you, is that you can write the story :wink: . No matter what you go through, there is always now, and even at your end, there still yet lies another beginning. Death is final, it is for the totality of ones lifes ambitions and dreams, it is the wooing call of lost souls. Cause maybe in death all things become understood. But much like poetry, life cannot be understood while one reads it. It is an essence, a force, a drive that compels us to go on, and when the end of the poem is near, it is not the end of life, but the end of one road, and a start of another. Maybe you just need to understand that you aapreciate the sound beauty, the essence of which life creates, and that it takes getting past those misunderstanding to move forward with that lovely grace.  :heart:


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What?

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Re: yes another, im leaving [Re: Zero7a1]
    #1809424 -

Zero7a1, 5 shrooms for you, man!

That is the most profound thing I've read lately...
And definitely what Monkah needs to hear, too.
Thanks.
Peace.


--------------------
:redpanda:
If I should die this very moment
I wouldn't fear
For I've never known completeness
Like being here
Wrapped in the warmth of you
Loving every breath of you
:heartpump: :bunnyhug: :yinyang:

:yinyang: :levitate: :earth: :levitate: :yinyang:

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Re: yes another, im leaving [Re: Zero7a1]
    #1809462 -

that was amazing.
i beleive ill write that down to take with me


well im leaving now. thank you all for your support.
and for all the wonderful conversations ive had here.

who knows, maybe in a few years, few months. ill see you guys still around.


great love to all

-Monk Of Tha Ahhhhs


--------------------
*NEW!* from Monkah Inc.The "Silence game" hold an exhilerating game between you and a friend,see who finds silence first! (warning:M. Inc. patented silence-in-its-self,failure to pay up will result in sending satan after you! err,we mean our laywer!)

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Re: yes another, im leaving [Re: Monkah]
    #1809486 -

Good luck, I hope you find what you are looking to find..
And if you kill yourself, I will kill you. Remember that. hehe
Peace.


--------------------
:redpanda:
If I should die this very moment
I wouldn't fear
For I've never known completeness
Like being here
Wrapped in the warmth of you
Loving every breath of you
:heartpump: :bunnyhug: :yinyang:

:yinyang: :levitate: :earth: :levitate: :yinyang:

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Re: yes another, im leaving [Re: Monkah]
    #1809538 -

I hope it helps you on your journey. The best of luck to you. :smile: 


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What?

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Re: yes another, im leaving [Re: Monkah]
    #1809646 -

I have taken some tough blows in my own life.
One thing I learned was that if you can absorb it, even grin in the face of it, you find the strength you never knew you had.

But it takes a couple days to get over the inevitable depressed state that follows. Don't base your existence on one person..please!!

These things go in cycles. If you bail on the downswing you'll never get to see the upswing. Will your life into what you want it to be in small increments. Don't let your life be decided by fate.

Don't lay down and die.
You will only have to live another life and go through your lesson again.
You don't want that do you?

Do the right thing.
Peace.


--------------------
I am what Willis was talkin' bout.

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Re: yes another, im leaving [Re: Monkah]
    #1809705 -

It takes much courage to leave everything and head to the unknown. I never knew you, but know you have my repect and i wish you a fufilling journey in the path of life.


--------------------
"Know your Body - Know your Mind - Know your Substance - Know your Source.

Lest we forget. "

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Re: yes another, im leaving [Re: Azmodeus]
    #1810074 -

My respect, too, but I'd definitely want to be in a better state of mind as I headed out.. not thinking about the worst, but rather "my life can be so much greater, there is so much out there, I am going to head out there and make myself".. that sort of thing, ya know?
Peace.


--------------------
:redpanda:
If I should die this very moment
I wouldn't fear
For I've never known completeness
Like being here
Wrapped in the warmth of you
Loving every breath of you
:heartpump: :bunnyhug: :yinyang:

:yinyang: :levitate: :earth: :levitate: :yinyang:

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Re: yes another, im leaving [Re: fireworks_god]
    #1810092 -

I don't see how you can keep a negative attitude on such a journey....i mean a week or two after you leave and the realisation will set in that you can go/do whatever you want! What an amazing experience...


--------------------
"Know your Body - Know your Mind - Know your Substance - Know your Source.

Lest we forget. "

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Re: yes another, im leaving [Re: Monkah]
    #1811099 -

We should start an offline community, or at least join an existing one.  :heartpump: 


--------------------
:heartpump: { { { ṧ◎ηḯ¢ αʟ¢ℌ℮мƴ } } } :heartpump:

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Re: yes another, im leaving [Re: Adamist]
    #1811181 -

We should definately start one:) 

As for homie, I dunno what the fuck your plan is, nor do I wanna change it, do what you gotta do man! Just remember that we will always be here for you =] I wish you luck on your journey, and I know life will get better for you real soon.  Shit happens, then when you think you are down, shit happens again. It will eventually get better :smile: Peace man :smile:


--------------------
The DJ's took pills to stay awake and play for seven days.

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Re: yes another, im leaving [Re: tak]
    #1811235 -

good luck.

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Re: yes another, im leaving [Re: domite]
    #1811273 -

good luck, n check out Asheville, NC

its a beautiful place, mabye get lost in the Pisgah National forest.
I lived there for about a year.

or come out to Western Washington, where is its absolutely incredible laid back place...wonderful atmosphere


--------------------

Take a music bath once or twice a week for a few seasons, and you will find that it is to the soul what the water bath is to the body.
Oliver Wendell Holmes

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Re: yes another, im leaving [Re: Monkah]
    #1811359 -

"It's only after you've lost everything
that you're free to do anything."  - Tyler Durden

Good luck on your journey  :smile:

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Re: yes another, im leaving [Re: chodamunky]
    #1812125 -

That it will never come again
Is what makes life so sweet.
Believing what we don't believe
Does not exhilarate.

That if it be, it be at best
An ablative estate --
This instigates an appetite
Precisely opposite.

-Dickinson, no. 1741

I hope you find what you believe, my friend, and that it exhilarates you.


--------------------
There are things known, and there are things unknown, and in between are the doors - Morrison

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