Hi Crystal G

I don't know anything about marriage, but he sounds like a keeper

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But he doesn't even mind washing my period blood-stained underwear with his bare hands.

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Must be love

Huehuecoyotl said:

Why do people need government permission to be friends...or even so called God's permission? It is just a piece of paper and unimportant. It is the relationship that matters...not the societal sanction.

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I think most people get married because they want to, not because society wants them to

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I am sorry, but 95% of all our behaviors are programming. Free will is a precious commodity that is rarely exercised. Many think that by reacting to their programming that they are free, but they are not.

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Crystal G said:

I never thought that I would get back together with my ex, but I did, and it's odd... I feel much better about it than when we first got together. We're making plans to start living together in the next couple of months again.

Even though I was kind of weary about our relationship--considering we had completely different, incompatible personalities that I was constantly reminding him of, I've come to realize that it's the combination of our lifestyles, in conjunction with our desires in a relationship and aspirations in life that makes us fit so perfectly. Like, for instance, he prefers the woman to be dominant and is often egging me on to be a lot more aggressive and unleash my inner hatred of all humanity subversely onto him (which is REALLY sexy!!!).

He really despises gender roles and that's the most attractive part about him. He isn't afraid to cook for me, clean for me, or do laundry for me (most guys are afraid of appearing "girly"). But he doesn't even mind washing my period blood-stained underwear with his bare hands. (Now THAT'S intimacy lol)

We’ve also lived together for a long time, and we’ve both seen each other at our worst, sickest moments. But we’re still completely attracted to each other regardless, no matter how terrible we look, even if we both look like a train wreck--this is something I never thought I’d say about somebody after seeing all the hidden parts about them.

The other MAJOR thing that's drawing me in, is that we both want open relationships. It’s a bit of a paradox since I have a tendency to get competitive seeing other women stare at my man, but when it’s purely about sex he prefers to have men as sexual partners. When it comes to him though, apparently jealousy is a huge turn-on for him, and it really gets him going rock hard when he sees me with another man.

I mean, on top of that, he is THE nicest man that I've ever been with, and although he lacks brains in the common sense department, I would be a fool to just throw him away and give him up like next day's garbage. We don't even have to compromise, it's usually whatever I say goes.

The rumor "Nice guys finish last" or "The way to get a woman is to treat her like shit" is all a myth to me. I fall for the unbelievably nice guys... HARD.

I can’t believe I’m actually saying this–-ME, the forever “single girl bachelorette”–but this unison works out perfectly for the both of us. He’s actually the closest I’ve come to thinking about marrying somebody... God knows he'd love it if I popped the question. Though we both know that medical science says that 2 years is typically the time frame that it takes for somebody to fall out of “romance” with another person, so just to be on the safe side I'm going to wait an extra 1-3 years, just to make sure this isn't all based on raging hormones. But when I do, I know I'd definitely be the one getting on one knee and asking to propose LOL!

The other thing that I like about him is that he is so open-minded and the farthest thing from traditional... I mean, I wouldn't want one of those cookie cutter gay ass clown parades that they call weddings. He's the type of guy that would want to exchange rings while going skydiving, and that kind of daredevil philosophy means that he'll be able to keep up with my lifestyle.

I know I'm jumping the gun here, but before I get myself too involved and hitched, I'd like to know the perks and the down-sides of marriage. Including money matters, any legal issues, tax cuts, benefits, deterrents, shared vs individual ownership (like bank accounts), even what prenuptial agreements are all about. (FYI my dream is to  "spread my seed" and have one baby from fathers of all different races, but realistically since I cannot afford the time and responsibility for all those kids, I probably wouldn't have any kids in the picture. Decades later though, I may consider adoption in the far future)

Thanks for the feedback in advance.

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Huehuecoyotl said:

Mostly your just seeking reward for agreeing with society. Since birth you have been told how you should act and even feel. These things were reinforced in you until you adopted them for yourself. A simple system of punishment and reward was used. Your parents, peers, teachers, etc... all participated in it. Our rebellions are only small ones. I mean...most hallucinogenic drug users are no threat to the status quo. We still hold the core values of the parent society. If we had been raised to think abusing old folks was noble we would be doing it. You made these agreements without even being conscious of it. I am no different. I have been married for 22 years, and I am now understanding that what my partner and I have has little to do with that piece of paper. Over the last few years I have started to examine my programming to understand it. Will I ever be "free"? No, but maybe I will be more aware of my choices and gain just a little freedom. The again maybe it's not possible. Ever seen the movies The Matrix...it was a parable.

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sounds to me like he does everything for you. what do you do for him?

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