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I'm afraid of being alone
    #8230607 -

So I recently got out of a relationship with my boyfriend of a one year. For the first time in my life I'm having a hard time getting over the whole thing. He is moving on just fine (already hooked up with someone else). Honestly I feel scared of living life without him. In the time we were together we had a daughter together, and I'm afraid no one is going to want me now that I have a kid. I will always choose her above any man, I'm just afraid of being alone my whole life. :undecided:

I'm usually not into all this relationship stuff, I'm just having a hard time with the whole thing.


--------------------
Listen to the trees and they will tell you the gypsy's story...

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: GypsyFlowerChild]
    #8230688 -

you'll be fine.
dont be scared that no one is going
want you because you have a child.

if the dude really likes you, he'll
accept your child too.

my x has a 3 y.o kid, it was a little
intimidating for me at first since i had never dated a 'mom',
but after spending time with them both,
it all came natural.

edit:
actually,
what intimidated me the most was being
'accepted' by her parents.


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:pacman: - - - -  :pill: :mushroom2: :pill2: :mushroom2: :regularshroom: :mushroomgrow: :pill: :pill2: :mushroom2: :poison:

:sun::heart::sun:

tiny_rabid_birds said:
"your avatar is dirty."

Edited by 40oz (04/02/08 08:57 PM)

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: GypsyFlowerChild]
    #8230691 -

meh, i honestly try to avoid ladies who already have kids. tried it, did not work out well.. but it really does not matter, youll find someone just fine if you really want to. maybe a guy who is in the same boat as you divorced with a child?

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: GypsyFlowerChild]
    #8230692 -

I heard once that your supposed to really feel the loss of a loved one through death or breakup one month for every year you were close.


So i guess that means your feelings are normal and it will pass in time...


--------------------
"And we, inhabitants of the great coral of the Cosmos, believe the atom (which still we cannot see) to be full matter, whereas, it too, like everything else, is but an embroidery of voids in the Void, and we give the name of being, dense and even eternal, to that dance of inconsistencies, that infinite extension that is identified with absolute Nothingness and that spins from its own non-being the illusion of everything."

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: GypsyFlowerChild]
    #8230695 -

I can imagine you being scared seeing as how your now a single mom. Your choices however, are very straightforward.
Obviously, you want a man who can deal with a kid as well, meaning you will definitely have less men interested in you, but maybe it's better that way.
Where as before you had your daughter, dating was more casual for both parties and neither had to be too serious right away, now you are probably looking for a man to start a family with. (I apologize if this is not the case) Now I think you will be a little more picky with who you want to help raise your daughter, and I think that only a man who both loved you and was interested in a very long-term relationship would attempt to date you, seeing as you already have a kid.
So the bottom line is, a man who is willing to get serious with you knowing full well you already have a child will probably stand a better chance of staying with you, as opposed to a guy dating someone who has no other strings attached.
It's basically a lesser amount but better quality deal.
But anyway, good luck with everything. Yours is a situation that I feel would be very difficult for me to live with.

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: GGreatOne234]
    #8230700 -



--------------------
No statements made in any post or message by myself should be construed to mean that I am now, or have ever been, participating in or considering participation in any activities in violation of any local, state, federal, or fashion police laws. All posts are works of fiction.

For well you know that its a fool who plays it cool
By making his world a little colder.

Under closer inspection I realised it was a funky ball of tits from outer space.


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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: GypsyFlowerChild]
    #8230701 -

GypsyFlowerChild said:
So I recently got out of a relationship with my boyfriend of a one year. For the first time in my life I'm having a hard time getting over the whole thing. He is moving on just fine (already hooked up with someone else). Honestly I feel scared of living life without him. In the time we were together we had a daughter together, and I'm afraid no one is going to want me now that I have a kid. I will always choose her above any man, I'm just afraid of being alone my whole life. :undecided:

I'm usually not into all this relationship stuff, I'm just having a hard time with the whole thing.


I know how you feel, you just have to occupy yourself with something maybe; It will pass eventually. Being alone actually is my biggest fear, so I can relate to the fear. Having a kid won't be too much of a problem I don't think, it just means that the next guy that sticks with you will really care if he is willing to help with a child too.


--------------------
The universe is a strange and wondrous place. The truth is quite odd enough to need no help from pseudoscientific charlatans. -Richard Dawkins

yeahthatguy@mac.hush.com

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone *DELETED* [Re: GypsyFlowerChild]
    #8230723 -

Post deleted by Chubba

Reason for deletion: Deleted


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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: GypsyFlowerChild]
    #8230791 -

Hey! You're cute, if that's you in the pic. You have made it this far in life to realize how hard reality really is. I say right now you're panicing like someone who just had a major car accident and walked away okay. Time will never repair all the damage done psychologically, but the pain will become less the more you move on. It would be nice to walk away from and forget that man, but there is someone who will always be there asking for him..maybe. I'll admit I have the same fear, but it only spikes the way you're feeling right now when I just get out of a relationship. I'd try to not follow his life story where you start comparing how you're doing to how he's doing. You're out of a relationship for a reason, move on, be strong. Wishing you the best of it,

Horse_meister


--------------------
KTHXBai2YoU

Horse_Meister


Life is what happens while you're busy making other plans.

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: Chubba]
    #8230820 -

i did it for a long term relationship, over half a decade.
the child will always be more important to her.
and that kid, might think the world of the guy for the first several years but they grow up and in my case (i was not the original father) the kid turned on me in a way.
twisted stuff. my parents never divorced so i might not quite understand what the boy was thinking.
i thought the world for him and would have died to save the kid, but really do not give a flying fuck about them anymore after what went down.
i would recommend other men without children to avoid it.. could be wrong that is just my outlook on it now.
others obviously have better things to say about it.
i would rather start a family similar to how i was brought up without the parents having multiple children with other partners.
i went into it with an open mind, did not work in the end.
best of luck to you OP, i think that you are fortunate to have a child.

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: Horse_Meister]
    #8230866 -

yeah if that is her real picture she can just walk out the door and pick any guy she wants really.

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: GGreatOne234]
    #8230872 -

GGreatOne234 said:
yeah if that is her real picture she can just walk out the door and pick any guy she wants really.


:thumbup:


--------------------
The universe is a strange and wondrous place. The truth is quite odd enough to need no help from pseudoscientific charlatans. -Richard Dawkins

yeahthatguy@mac.hush.com

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone *DELETED* [Re: GGreatOne234]
    #8230876 -

Post deleted by Chubba

Reason for deletion: Deleted


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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: GypsyFlowerChild]
    #8230896 -

I'm not opposed to being in a relationship with a woman and her kid,
as someone said above the key ingredient to make yourself appealing
is being financially and emotionally stable.

Hang in there, some lucky guy will love to have the two of you in his life!

How old is the daughter, best guess is recently newborn..


--------------------
-=Check my Gallery=-

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: Chubba]
    #8230898 -

no actually, it does not matter for females, if they have kids or not even attractive, ive seen it before, its almost disturbing how easy it is for females. :smile:

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: GGreatOne234]
    #8230918 -

GGreatOne234 said:
Its almost disturbing how easy it is for females. :smile:


Finding a relationship isn't the same as sustaining one succesfully.

My two cents is not to rush into anything as I hope you'll find that relationships that develop naturally over time tend to forge much stronger links.


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Discuss Politics

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: GypsyFlowerChild]
    #8230931 -

Posting tits usually helps


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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: GypsyFlowerChild]
    #8230933 -

GypsyFlowerChild said:
So I recently got out of a relationship with my boyfriend of a one year. For the first time in my life I'm having a hard time getting over the whole thing. He is moving on just fine (already hooked up with someone else). Honestly I feel scared of living life without him. In the time we were together we had a daughter together, and I'm afraid no one is going to want me now that I have a kid. I will always choose her above any man, I'm just afraid of being alone my whole life. :undecided:

I'm usually not into all this relationship stuff, I'm just having a hard time with the whole thing.


ill be your internet man, baby. youre a cutie :wink:

unless you live somewhere in missouri, then we could really get it on. haha


--------------------
"The soul has greater need of the ideal than of the real. It is by the real that we exist, it is by the ideal that we live."

If you want to get a hold of me, my email address is in my profile. Just click on my screen name. I got banned from using private messages cause I didn't follow the rules... :frown:

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: GypsyFlowerChild]
    #8230963 -

i can help u.


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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: GypsyFlowerChild]
    #8230976 -

I've been that way for 26 years.When your disable, no one will date you..:sad:


--------------------
:Awesketch:

:cool: Fair is Fair :devil:

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: Brainiac]
    #8230991 -

whats up with the burst of relationship threads. r we in a crisis....summer is cummin young ones and u know what that means....grab some bud and meet me at the mall.


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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: highc]
    #8231024 -

highc said:
whats up with the burst of relationship threads. r we in a crisis


springtime hormones, I know I got it too


--------------------
-=Check my Gallery=-

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: GypsyFlowerChild]
    #8231051 -

Thanks for the feed back everyone. It really helps. Also, thank you for the complements.


--------------------
Listen to the trees and they will tell you the gypsy's story...

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: Vanguard]
    #8231052 -

yeah cant lie....they are begining to take effect on me to. noooooooo


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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: highc]
    #8231248 -

i've been feelin it too, i do just fine being single most of the time, but I've kinda been itchin for a mrs. apple as of late.

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: appleorange]
    #8231307 -

Clearly you need and orange to your apple


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Discuss Politics

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: Ferris]
    #8231589 -

girls are too fishy these days..


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Re: I'm afraid of being alone *DELETED* *DELETED* [Re: highc]
    #8231599 -

Post deleted by Chubba

Reason for deletion: Deleted


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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: Chubba]
    #8231608 -

lol.....idk my bff jill


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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: Chubba]
    #8231688 -

Chubba said:
As in the smell? I reckon... fucking too much McDonalds...

Eat your salad and fruit ladies so you taste sweet!!


:lol:

gross, dude...


--------------------
:pacman: - - - -  :pill: :mushroom2: :pill2: :mushroom2: :regularshroom: :mushroomgrow: :pill: :pill2: :mushroom2: :poison:

:sun::heart::sun:

tiny_rabid_birds said:
"your avatar is dirty."

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: 40oz]
    #8231750 -

oh man fuck you guys, i gave her a compliment earlier today and now i realize i'm typical. i hate being typical.

to be fair though i was mainly referencing some of the things you've mentioned in your posts, and not just your appearance.


--------------------
You can check the last post in my journal for contact info.

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: truekimbo2]
    #8231799 -

what are you talking about & to whom?


--------------------
:pacman: - - - -  :pill: :mushroom2: :pill2: :mushroom2: :regularshroom: :mushroomgrow: :pill: :pill2: :mushroom2: :poison:

:sun::heart::sun:

tiny_rabid_birds said:
"your avatar is dirty."

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: 40oz]
    #8231836 -

I believe hes talking about GypsyFlowerChild.


--------------------
The universe is a strange and wondrous place. The truth is quite odd enough to need no help from pseudoscientific charlatans. -Richard Dawkins

yeahthatguy@mac.hush.com

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: yeahthatguy]
    #8231840 -

and directed at all.

sorry, i don't use the reply to feature.


--------------------
You can check the last post in my journal for contact info.

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: truekimbo2]
    #8231859 -

truekimbo2 said:
sorry, i don't use the reply to feature.


how typical :smirk:


--------------------
:pacman: - - - -  :pill: :mushroom2: :pill2: :mushroom2: :regularshroom: :mushroomgrow: :pill: :pill2: :mushroom2: :poison:

:sun::heart::sun:

tiny_rabid_birds said:
"your avatar is dirty."

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: 40oz]
    #8231988 -

nooooooooooooooo!!!!! i've been burned twice in one day, its only 4am.


--------------------
You can check the last post in my journal for contact info.

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: truekimbo2]
    #8231995 -

well isn't that typical?

:lol:


--------------------
:pacman: - - - -  :pill: :mushroom2: :pill2: :mushroom2: :regularshroom: :mushroomgrow: :pill: :pill2: :mushroom2: :poison:

:sun::heart::sun:

tiny_rabid_birds said:
"your avatar is dirty."

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: 40oz]
    #8232035 -

I'm a little bit different, but nearly the same.

My parents were just 3 months out of high school when I was born, and they got married primarily due to me.

My father joined the Army, and I guess I've always felt that my mom and dad loved me, but never wanted me.

All through life, I've never really gone more than 3-5 months between relationships. Then I had a baby with my GF that we gave up for adoption. We weren't together then and drugs were gettin me pretty fucked up for the first time, etc...

Then I dated this other girl and 6 months after we broke up she visits me in hail saying that her baby is mine.

She was born Nov. 28 2007, But I still don't know who the father is and now I'm back with my first baby momma, and I've always loved her, but not the way that feels "right" to me.

So now I wonder what it would be like to be alone for awhile. I've straightened my life out and should be able to afford an apartment with my buddy.

But I don't want to break Cara's heart either...

Life/Love is stupid sometimes, probably only because I let it be though.


--------------------
My advice is to find those things that give pleasure and do them often without too much attachment and relax and wait for the show to end.

-Icelander-

I like free markets and all. Truly I do, at least in general, but there needs to be some kind of oversight in recognition of sustainability. Life works the same way, on a bunch of sustainable systems. Why not honor what made us what we are and take some lessons? Nature FTW!

~dill705~

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: truekimbo2]
    #8233077 -

Quote:
truekimbo2 said:to be fair though i was mainly referencing some of the things you've mentioned in your posts, and not just your appearance.


I would much rather be recognized by my mind than body.


--------------------
Listen to the trees and they will tell you the gypsy's story...

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: GypsyFlowerChild]
    #8233084 -

:werd:


--------------------
My advice is to find those things that give pleasure and do them often without too much attachment and relax and wait for the show to end.

-Icelander-

I like free markets and all. Truly I do, at least in general, but there needs to be some kind of oversight in recognition of sustainability. Life works the same way, on a bunch of sustainable systems. Why not honor what made us what we are and take some lessons? Nature FTW!

~dill705~

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: GypsyFlowerChild]
    #8233085 -

GypsyFlowerChild said:
I would much rather be recognized by my mind than body.


As long as you're quoting Grateful Dead lyrics below your name, your mind has my respect.


--------------------

Discuss Politics

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: Ferris]
    #8233122 -

Well with the kid and all good luck. But dont let it get you down. Someone will fall in love with the kid and wont be able to leave and then realize its ok and be with you. It happened to me and I hate my old lady. But I fell in love with her son since he had no male figure and looked to me. Now he and my 2 biological sons are all daddy's boys.

Id leave her in a second if I was childless but am too much of a loving daddy to leave my her with my boys. Even if to just get my own place across town and see them all the time. Id rather be miserable and have my kids know daddy is there 24/7 not every other weekend or every few days or whatever. There is more guys out there and with those qualities. Just wait until you find him and he will not be affected at all by you having a kid.

Also trust he is out there and dont hide the kid thing or youll end up making mistakes with guys who will hold the kid against you and youll regret being taken advantage of just because your looking for love and Mr Right with your child in mind all at the same time. So dont rush and keep your eyes peeled he is out there somewhere.


--------------------
While driving my overpowered car around tight corners like a maniac all my friends yell out. Hey man slow down, we might Wreck. I reply, Shut up, I drive like Dale Earnhardt. They all look around at each other and laugh. Then one asks me. Hey wait, isnt he dead? Well yeah he is I said. Then I drive like Junior I mumble, while I promptly slow down.
"Everyday is opposite day. Everything I say is opposite of what you think I am saying. So if I say something and you think I mean one thing it is the opposite of what I am really trying to say. I actually mean another thing other than what you are thinking I am saying. Get it? Good because that's what I meant".
"You may defeat me, you may even destroy me, But you will never CONQUER me"!

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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: GypsyFlowerChild]
    #8233158 -

GypsyFlowerChild said:
Quote:
truekimbo2 said:to be fair though i was mainly referencing some of the things you've mentioned in your posts, and not just your appearance.


I would much rather be recognized by my mind than body.


We don't have much to go on...you've been here over a year and only 70 posts!

For all we know you could be a raging bitch :lol: (certainly not saying you are)


--------------------
No statements made in any post or message by myself should be construed to mean that I am now, or have ever been, participating in or considering participation in any activities in violation of any local, state, federal, or fashion police laws. All posts are works of fiction.

For well you know that its a fool who plays it cool
By making his world a little colder.

Under closer inspection I realised it was a funky ball of tits from outer space.


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Re: I'm afraid of being alone [Re: circularvortex]
    #8233392 -

circularvortex said:
GypsyFlowerChild said:
Quote:
truekimbo2 said:to be fair though i was mainly referencing some of the things you've mentioned in your posts, and not just your appearance.


I would much rather be recognized by my mind than body.


We don't have much to go on...you've been here over a year and only 70 posts!

For all we know you could be a raging bitch :lol: (certainly not saying you are)


Meh, what can I say. Internet really isn't my thing.


--------------------
Listen to the trees and they will tell you the gypsy's story...

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