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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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I always make bad impressions upon my ex-girlfriend's new boyfriends
#5382442 - 03/09/06 06:11 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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I dated a girl some years ago and we remained friends ever since. There was drama and bullshit in our relationship at times. But, over the past six months things really changed. She stopped being possessive about me. She finally realized that we were not going to be together.
I asked her to be my true friend. I wanted her to be there for me, to talk to me, and to genuinely care about me. I promised the same to her. I was elated that our friendship had gone from being a fucked up mess to a healthy friendship. We became best friends.
When she got new boyfriends I was genuinely happy for her. But no matter how hard I tried to be nice, these new boyfriends never seemed to like me. Maybe it was because this girl and I had dated at one time. Maybe it was because we talked on the phone a lot. I tried to put my best foot forward, but you could always tell they had animosity toward me.
This girl and I had a falling out about two months ago. We haven't spoken since. She and her new boyfriend moved to another state. I messaged her boyfriend on Myspace. I told him that I hoped the move had gone well and to tell the girl that I said hello. He didn't respond and he deleted me from his friend's list.
I am genuinely down about this. I guess I can't win for trying to be a nice guy.
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Jadian
Ninja


Registered: 07/07/05
Posts: 7,404
Loc: The desert
Last seen: 6 years, 1 month
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Re: I always make bad impressions upon my ex-girlfriend's new boyfriends [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5382451 - 03/09/06 06:15 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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Nobody wants his girls ex hanging around trying to stay friendly. I'm sure it's nothing personal.
-------------------- LNC's official Alaskan stoner
 
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Silversoul
Rhizome


Registered: 01/01/05
Posts: 23,576
Loc: The Barricades
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Re: I always make bad impressions upon my ex-girlfriend's new boyfriends [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5382462 - 03/09/06 06:19 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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I'm still friends with my ex-girlfriend, but I've never talked with her new boyfriend. I prefer to keep it that way.
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The_Red_Crayon
Exposer of Truth


Registered: 08/13/03
Posts: 13,673
Loc: Smokey Mtns. TN
Last seen: 6 years, 8 months
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Re: I always make bad impressions upon my ex-girlfriend's new boyfriends [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5382465 - 03/09/06 06:19 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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Ah the classic Bridge Burning technique. Dont worry though regret has a funny way of catching up to people.
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blissedout


Registered: 11/11/04
Posts: 22,320
Loc: Yonder
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Re: I always make bad impressions upon my ex-girlfriend's new boyfriends [Re: The_Red_Crayon]
#5382483 - 03/09/06 06:23 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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I agree with you, totally. If she is truly a good friend, then she will eventually feel bad for turning her back on him like that.
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: I always make bad impressions upon my ex-girlfriend's new boyfriends [Re: blissedout]
#5382591 - 03/09/06 06:55 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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I just poured my heart out to her boyfriend who just dissed me:
I see that you deleted me from your friend's list and that you didn't respond to my message. I am a little miffed at this. It is obvious that you are mad at me. Please let me explain myself and my feelings.
If I didn't like you I would just admit it. But, from the times that I met you I can genuinely say that you seemed like a nice guy. *****'s last boyfriend (#####) was a dick and I wasn't afraid to make that plain.
***** and I used to date. Given that I am an ex-boyfriend I can completely understand how you would be leery of me being in *****'s life. I myself would be leery if my girlfriend was good friends with one of her ex's. I can assure you that over the past year I have had no ulterior motives when it came to my friendship with Jenn. I was not trying to get in her pants, I wasn't trying to "win her back", and I wasn't trying to play games. To be honest, I never even viewed her in a romantic way.
I truly tried to be a loyal friend who would be there for her. I tried to support her in anything that she did. When she mentioned that you two were dating I was thrilled for her because you sounded like a cool guy. She has dated way too many assholes in her life and I don't like seeing her with another one. I'll admit that I was worried that our close friendship might bother you (which I'm sure that it did).
I care for ***** very much and I always will. This caring is completely pure, innocent, and genuine. I want her to be happy and I want her life to be good. Even when we had spouts of not liking each other I still cared about her. Most of the time, I like her very much and I enjoy her company. There were times when there were tensions between us (like now). My friendship with ***** has been trying at times to say the least. There were times when she was incredibly immature, manipulative, and hurtful with the things she said or did. However, I'll admit that I was (and still am sometimes) immature and vindictive toward her when I get mad. I am not perfect. Sometimes it was her fault and sometimes it was my fault. Even during these trying times I always made it clear that I cared about her and that if she needed anything I would be there for her.
If you don't want me contacting *****, I won't. If you don't feel like responding to this message then that is ok. Given that you two have moved and started a new life, I can understand how you might not want me in the picture at all. Maybe it will be better for ***** to "leave her old life behind" and start anew.
While it is obvious that you and ***** probably don't think too highly of me now, I still extend my thoughts to both of you. I hope that things go well for you both in your new location.
Edited by RandalFlagg (03/09/06 07:10 PM)
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Jadian
Ninja


Registered: 07/07/05
Posts: 7,404
Loc: The desert
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Re: I always make bad impressions upon my ex-girlfriend's new boyfriends [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5382606 - 03/09/06 07:00 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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Honestly, if someone was saying that shit to my girlfriend, I'd tell him to fuck off and if he didn't listen I'd get mad.
This being if I have no previous relationship with the guy. I dunno, I don't blame you for wanting to be there for your friend though, it's just that guys aren't really too understanding about things like this.
-------------------- LNC's official Alaskan stoner
 
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: I always make bad impressions upon my ex-girlfriend's new boyfriends [Re: Jadian]
#5382610 - 03/09/06 07:01 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
Jadian said: Honestly, if someone was saying that shit to my girlfriend, I'd tell him to fuck off and if he didn't listen I'd get mad.

I swear I'm being completely honest. I am not trying to cause shit.
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The_Red_Crayon
Exposer of Truth


Registered: 08/13/03
Posts: 13,673
Loc: Smokey Mtns. TN
Last seen: 6 years, 8 months
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Re: I always make bad impressions upon my ex-girlfriend's new boyfriends [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5382617 - 03/09/06 07:04 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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You might just want to cut your losses. If she wants to be your friend she will.
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Jadian
Ninja


Registered: 07/07/05
Posts: 7,404
Loc: The desert
Last seen: 6 years, 1 month
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Re: I always make bad impressions upon my ex-girlfriend's new boyfriends [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5382619 - 03/09/06 07:04 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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I see where you're coming from. What I'm trying to say is I doubt her boyfriend does. He'll always be suspicious about you, because that's an issue that goes right down to instincts of protecting your woman.
-------------------- LNC's official Alaskan stoner
 
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: I always make bad impressions upon my ex-girlfriend's new boyfriends [Re: Jadian]
#5382639 - 03/09/06 07:10 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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Man, I'm so sad. I lost my best friend.
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TheDude
is waiting forthe peak

Registered: 04/15/03
Posts: 2,876
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Re: I always make bad impressions upon my ex-girlfriend's new boyfriends [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5382725 - 03/09/06 07:40 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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Who needs friends when you have a gun.
-------------------- "this lebowski he called himself 'the dude'. now, 'dude', that's a name no one would self-apply where i come from but there was a lot about the dude that didn't make sense to me...."--the Stranger
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RandalFlagg
Stranger
Registered: 06/15/02
Posts: 15,608
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Re: I always make bad impressions upon my ex-girlfriend's new boyfriends [Re: TheDude]
#5382752 - 03/09/06 07:45 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
TheDude said: Who needs friends when you have a gun.
Yeah really. I'm so fucking depressed.
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TheDude
is waiting forthe peak

Registered: 04/15/03
Posts: 2,876
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Re: I always make bad impressions upon my ex-girlfriend's new boyfriends [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5382814 - 03/09/06 07:59 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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Sorry to hear man. Going for a walk always cheers me up.
-------------------- "this lebowski he called himself 'the dude'. now, 'dude', that's a name no one would self-apply where i come from but there was a lot about the dude that didn't make sense to me...."--the Stranger
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browndustin
dustybuddy

Registered: 10/03/03
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Last seen: 9 years, 8 months
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Re: I always make bad impressions upon my ex-girlfriend's new boyfriends [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5382830 - 03/09/06 08:02 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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Dude, don't get too down about it. I've been there and it was really kind of lame. Embarrasing to say the least.
Think about it from his point of view, the guy is probably insecure about what you two have. Fuck. I would be. You guys managed to keep shit together after splitting up and to be honest, I'd probably tell you to fuck off or end up putting my fist in your mouth.
You're a great guy and all... but that's exactly the thing. Even if you guys are completely neutral and flacid, he's still going to worry. He's got balls, testosterone and a paranoid concious.
But if I were you, I'd probably be doing the same thing. Just don't spill your guts out to the new bf, it's just fuel for the fire. And it won't go anywhere. Keep talking to her though, he needs to suck it up.
-------------------- When the stress burns my brain it's like acid raindrops maryjane is the only thing that makes the pain stop
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blink
eye of horus



Registered: 03/31/02
Posts: 11,349
Loc: Geographic Location (Stat...
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Re: I always make bad impressions upon my ex-girlfriend's new boyfriends *DELETED* [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5382855 - 03/09/06 08:09 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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Post deleted by blinkidiotReason for deletion: Im sorry
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browndustin
dustybuddy

Registered: 10/03/03
Posts: 2,957
Last seen: 9 years, 8 months
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Re: I always make bad impressions upon my ex-girlfriend's new boyfriends [Re: blink]
#5382873 - 03/09/06 08:13 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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Very, very wise words blinkidiot. I could not have said it better myself!
I never, EVER bother talking to girls over IM or email anymore, too many bad experiences.
-------------------- When the stress burns my brain it's like acid raindrops maryjane is the only thing that makes the pain stop
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Penguarky Tunguin
f n o r d

Registered: 08/08/04
Posts: 17,192
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Re: I always make bad impressions upon my ex-girlfriend's new boyfriends [Re: browndustin]
#5383281 - 03/09/06 10:16 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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Same here. Never again will I text or write emails or whatever. Its either going to be done strictly in person or at the minimum over the phone. Texts are especially troublesome.
-------------------- Every mistake, intentional or otherwise, in the above post, is the fault of the reader.
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Jackattack
Stranger

Registered: 01/16/06
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Re: I always make bad impressions upon my ex-girlfriend's new boyfriends [Re: Penguarky Tunguin]
#5383526 - 03/09/06 10:59 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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Hey man how can you be best freinds with a girl? They're really annoying and they lie like no other. I bet she thinks your annoying cause your always texting them but she'll never tell you that. You need to make some new freinds man you'll feel better after that. Sorry if I sounded like an asshole.
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Jadian
Ninja


Registered: 07/07/05
Posts: 7,404
Loc: The desert
Last seen: 6 years, 1 month
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Re: I always make bad impressions upon my ex-girlfriend's new boyfriends [Re: RandalFlagg]
#5383545 - 03/09/06 11:03 PM (17 years, 10 months ago) |
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Quote:
RandalFlagg said: Man, I'm so sad. I lost my best friend.
Yeah here's your lesson as to why not to be friends with girls. They are strange and unpredictable creatures, best when used purely for entertainment.
-------------------- LNC's official Alaskan stoner
 
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