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Friend tried to gouge my eyes out
    #4955635 -

So yesterday i was rolling around with my homeboy M. We had been drinking all day. When evening rolls around he is fairly drunk, he starts acting belligerent. Not towards me, or his gf who were with him tho.
He starts lying compulsively again. He only does that sometimes when he is very drunk. Making up new shit. Bringing up old lies.

So we are on our way to hang out with a few friends of mine. We get there, and M starts talking shit to them. He has been very bitter for a long time because She didn't wanna be friends anymore, and her boyfriend hooked up with her. This has been building for a few years. They just fell out, and there was no closure on the relationship.
Anyway when he starts trying to pick fist fights with both of them, i and his girlfriend have to drag/coax him back to the car. She starts driving home. I'm in the back passenger area of the truck, and he's in the front.
I tell him how UN-cool that was, and he starts trying to fight me.

We get to a stop-sign up the street, and he gets out of the car trying to get me to "step out" I tell him that i don't want to fight. So he grabs the front of my shirt. I tell him again that i don't wanna fight him.
He starts pulling harder, so i punch him twice in the face. He's dazed. A few seconds later he moves forward towards me, so i punch him a few more times in the head/face. As he's climbing back into the truck, i keep hitting him in the head, but its not slowing him down.
He somehow gets on top of me, and pins me down. Then he puts his thumbs in my eye sockets, and starts to squeeze my Eyeballs. I fight him off for a whole minute, but he gets me pinned, and goes for my eyes again.
At this point, I'm yelling at his girlfriend to call the cops. She's behind him yelling at him to stop. I was punching him in the head, and trying to bring my legs up around over his neck.
At this point, i was very close to pulling out my pocket knife, and stabbing him. I was scared that he was going to blind me. He doesn't know how close he was to being stabbed.
He got his thumbs into my eyes one more time, i realized that if he wanted to blind me, he could have. All he had to do was squeeze alittle bit harder.

Anyway this all happened in less than a minute. His thumb slipped out of my eye, and i grabbed onto it with my teeth. He cocked back his other hand, and i caught it. We stayed that way for a minute talking shit, and we both agreed to quit.

Anyway i got out, they drove off. I walked back to my friends house, and we got nice and drunk. His girlfriends sister calls telling me that he is coming back with a .38 and threatening to kill me. I was scared for a sec, than i realized that he couldn't get access to a gun before he would sober up.

Pretty crazy huh? So he's been calling all morning, leaving messages trying to apologize. It would be one thing if we just got in a fist fight. I would let that slide by now, but the motherfucker tried to gouge my eyes out!
I am pissed, but i know that i will forgive him eventually. He's never done no shit like that before, and as long as he never does again, i will chock it up to alcohol. I've done worse when i was drunk. I'm not going to drop one of my best friends over it.
what do you think?


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Re: Friend tried to gouge my eyes out [Re: Dreamer987]
    #4955762 -

If he doesnt stop drinking he'll do it again.

next time you or him may not be so lucky


talk to him about it.. hes got a problem

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Re: Friend tried to gouge my eyes out [Re: Dreamer987]
    #4955766 -

from personal expericances i'd say to ditch him
ive had good friends go retarded with the help of alcohol
id say there are some mental problems/situations here that the alcohol only brought out.
and you cant just write it off on the alcohol.
if my expericances with this sort of thing are common, then i say it will just get worse.
he will do it again.


but then im no psycologist
ive just seen a few friends turn to sorry ass peices of shit


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shroomery.
not even once.


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Re: Friend tried to gouge my eyes out [Re: sherm]
    #4955850 -

oh

I was no way blaming the drink...but you are right, he's got some issues.

personally I would have beat the crap outta him and hung around until he sobered up and then had a talk

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Re: Friend tried to gouge my eyes out [Re: goobler]
    #4955928 -

Wow dude, that is a pretty fucked up story.
I think you really should stop hanging out with this guy. I know the type. This will happen again and again and again...

Pluto

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Re: Friend tried to gouge my eyes out [Re: Tien]
    #4955985 -

just avoid him. forever, you can catch up with him at his wake.

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Re: Friend tried to gouge my eyes out [Re: Dreamer987]
    #4956628 -

if you had hit him hard enough the first time you'd be friends still...

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Re: Friend tried to gouge my eyes out [Re: cateyes]
    #4956732 -

Dreamer987 said:
what do you think?


run away from this lifestyle immediately and never come back to it.

That was very disturbing to read....... :/

I lose more and more faith in alcohol. It's a fine drug in low doses I suppose [though it's toxic and I much prefer psychedelics], it's the people that are the problem I guess.... but ..... man that just creeps me out.

I don't think you should hang out with him anymore.... it's not safe. You said you've done worse... that's fucked but, consider it a wakeup call.... you could have died even.....
goobler said:
If he doesnt stop drinking he'll do it again.

next time you or him may not be so lucky


talk to him about it.. hes got a problem


exactly.

If you keep getting in these situations involving alcohol, this kind of stuff will happen again. Find a better crowd or only hang with him sober.


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I am the MacDaddy of Heimlich County, I play it Straight Up Yo!

....I embrace my desire to feel the rhythm, to feel connected enough to step aside and weep like a widow, to feel inspired, to fathom the power, to witness the beauty, to bathe in the fountain, to swing on the spiral of our divinity and still be a human......
Om Namah Shivaya, I tell you What!

Edited by leery11 (11/19/05 06:56 PM)

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Re: Friend tried to gouge my eyes out [Re: leery11]
    #4957089 -

And stop drinking and driving. :whack:


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I am the king of Rome, and above grammar! - Emperor Sigismund

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Re: Friend tried to gouge my eyes out [Re: Heffy]
    #4958797 -

In the end of your post you said you've done worse when drunk? Just curious but what did you do that was worse than trying to gouge a friends eyes out???


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Re: Friend tried to gouge my eyes out [Re: Dreamer987]
    #4959146 -

You consider this guy a friend?!!! As the saying goes: 'With friends like this, who needs enemies?' 'Friend,' my friend, is a type of loved one, from the Greek 'philias,' from which we get Philadelphia - City of Brotherly Love - and words like 'filial' and 'affiliation.' Actually, you don't need a dictionary, you need a counselor...which is why this counselor responded. Take a valuable bit of advice: make some distance between the both of you - long distance.

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Re: Friend tried to gouge my eyes out [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #4960443 -

I've known this dude for 4 years. He's one of the few close friends i have left that i can count on to be there for me.
Granted this was a severe fuck up, and he obviously has some emotional issues that need working out, but I can't really hold a grudge.
Like i said, i have done worse to people when i was drunk, and they forgave me. So i would be a hypocrite not to forgive him. I've already forgiven him in my head. I will just give him a few weeks/months to think about what he did.
I still trust him. Just not around alcohol. From now on, our friendship will be alcohol free.


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Re: Friend tried to gouge my eyes out [Re: Dreamer987]
    #4960462 -

"if you had hit him hard enough the first time you'd be friends still..."
yea, i was trying. We can't all be Bruce Lee's.
This situation reinforces the fact that i need to learn how to defend myself better.


Oh, and thanx for the advice everybody.


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Re: Friend tried to gouge my eyes out [Re: Dreamer987]
    #4961532 -

Was he the kind of guy who just can't fight? (No judging, I'm one of them... but because of it I *don't* start fights)

It doesn't really sound like he threw any punches or anything. I know some people who, if it came to an unavoidable fight, would more likely go for the throat or whatever, knowing a punch wouldn't phaze a guy. Follows the same lines as pulling hair, biting, kicking in the nuts, but much more psycho-extreme.


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You're not like the others. You like the same things I do. Wax paper, boiled football leather... dog breath. We're not hitch-hiking anymore, we're riding!

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Re: Friend tried to gouge my eyes out [Re: Koala Koolio]
    #4961609 -

I'm a rather violent individual myself, even more so when drunk.
But I don't care how drunk YOU are getting (not you, just general),
There is a line that should stay the same..

Upon being pretty drunk before, I've realized I started some shit with someone I'd only handle while sober..
I punched this guy in the throat and kneed him in the sternum the first chance I got

Had I been sober, I wouldn't have done this, being drunk it was a 'gotta do w/e it takes' step..

Moral of my post: he started some shit, got rocked a few times, and had to do 'w/e it takes'

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Re: Friend tried to gouge my eyes out [Re: Koala Koolio]
    #4961703 -

"Was he the kind of guy who just can't fight?"

i don't know. I've never really been in a fight since middle school.
He is smaller than me, but he lifts weights, and does manual labor. And he gets into fights frequently with his family members.
My mistake was not getting out of the truck. On my feet i probably could have won, but i don't know how to wrestle, or grapple or whatever. It was a simple matter of him getting me pinned, and dominating.


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Re: Friend tried to gouge my eyes out [Re: Dreamer987]
    #4961827 -

Dude...you don't have a "friendship" - that kind of violence defines a sick relationship, but in no way carries any resemblance to a friendship. If he is ever 'there for you' when he's sober, it is merely out of some guilt-ridden obligation for having tried to blind or kill you. Consider yourself advised by virtue of my age, experience and profession. I don't need to hear any further rationalization for being near this guy because you'd rather not be alone, or whatever. It sounds like you've got a major problem with violence yourself, so maybe the two of you can go on playing Popeye and Bluto, but it's not what I understand as friendship.

Peace Out, or not.

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Re: Friend tried to gouge my eyes out [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #4961955 -

I've had to fight a really good friend of mine once.. He started hiitting his girlfriend so I tried to stop it..He head butted me so I started punching him.. we ended up on the ground and he ended up biting me ont he side of my head.. I think he was going for my ear..Anyway I choked him out and let him go and he tried to stab me we started fighting again..Luckily he wasn't very good with the knife cause I managed to wrestled it out of his hand and I literaly had to beat him unconcious and throw him down the stairs and lock the door.. It was fucking scary.. Obviously were not friends anymore and this guy sounds pretty similar to my friend.. I'd say find some more peacefull people to be with.. Violence is stupid..

Edited by Bhairabas (11/20/05 11:54 PM)

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Re: Friend tried to gouge my eyes out [Re: MarkostheGnostic]
    #4963976 -

I don't think your really listening Mark. I don't feel like trying to justify my actions, but I'll do it one more time.

"Dude...you don't have a "friendship" - that kind of violence defines a sick relationship, but in no way carries any resemblance to a friendship. If he is ever 'there for you' when he's sober, it is merely out of some guilt-ridden obligation for having tried to blind or kill you"
Alright, as i stated earlier this is a one time incidence of violence, out of 4 years of friendship.

"I don't need to hear any further rationalization for being near this guy because you'd rather not be alone, or whatever."
Its not because he's my only friend. I've got other friends, its that i see friendship as a sacred bond. True friends should only part under serious circumstances. I've seen to many friendships get fucked up over stupid inconsequential shit. Girls, misunderstandings. Not that this was trivial, or i would let him get away with it again, but I'm about forgiveness. Everybody deserves a 2nd chance.

"It sounds like you've got a major problem with violence yourself, so maybe the two of you can go on playing Popeye and Bluto."
From which one of my posts did you conclude that i have problems with violence?
The one where i said that i have never been in a real fight before this, or the one where i tried to diffuse the situation verbally, before defending myself?

"Peace Out, or not"
sincere much? don't get pissed off, because i won't take your advice. Mabey i have to learn from my own mistakes.

I apreciate everybodys advice, and will take it to heart.


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Re: Friend tried to gouge my eyes out [Re: Dreamer987]
    #4964016 -

I certainly wouldn't ditch the friendship... you guys definately need to have a talk.

Whether or not he was justified threatening your other friends, what the hell were you thinking bringing him over there while he was beligerant and you knew he had issues with them? Thats like smoking a cigarette next to a powder keg and not expecting anything to happen.

Realize there was poor judgment both on his part, and on your part... and sit down to talk to him. thats all you can really do, things will work out.

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